Oh God...you are in for the high jump now

At this point, I’m making terrible decisions so I really couldn’t give a naff. Naff off Ms. Gestapo and your communist rfgime. I’m an individual damn it.

You were in Vancouver last week, where’s the place to go to have a jolly good time?

I was just a brief visitor in Oinkworld, I was just dazzled by the bright lights of the big city

Yeah right- I can just imagine when she comes home how the conversation will go..

" Hello Oinky darling, how was your week end?"

"All very quiet dear, I just stayed in and watched an amazing subtitled art house movie on my laptop, eating my lentils and salad and missing you"

Should I follow the white rabbit? Naff it, what could happen?

Say's the bloke partying on a Panago.

Just go for it

I was having the prawn salad

You're right. I got two kidneys, a forgiving liver, a pocket full of rubles and HID is in Tokyo. What could go wrong?

Edited to note, that does rather sound like lyrics from an early 1990s Beck song.

There is only one possible reply to that....

How much spends did she give you for the weekend?

We might not all be rolling in the filthy lucre of the British tax payers investments but I got my own credit card and bus pass.

Bus pass???

Just a little query- amusing though it is to observe you sliding down that slope of drunkeness, why are you whilst out on a night of likely drunken debauchery still posting on Expats ?

To give you all a glimpse into my glamours lifestyle but really I'm a lonely and shunned soul.

(turns out, it's mainly because I'm drunk and smell of cat food)

And there was you thinking that it was that woman sat next to you. You must be really relieved to find out it was you all along

I bloody hope you don't have a cat btw..You know how much I love cats

A plastic card to get on buses