britex01

What I learned about families in Texas, albeit a few, tend to be 'in your face', follow our ways, follow our thinking and so forth. If one is integrating as an outsider (foreigner) by-and-large southern families, seemingly, turn on the tap of suspicion and close ranks, especially when a member of their flock is taken outside of a family's 'comfort zone'.

I think it's down to small town, never been anywhere, this is the only place on earth that matters and where you belong, attitude. Anywhere beyond that, especially culture-wise, is highly suspect.

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repeat offender

I really dont think you can make such a generalized statement regarding southern families based on just your exposure to your in -law's. Families vary just like the ones in the UK. Do you plan on moving to the US or your wife to the UK ? Must be difficult to be apart.

Kaffy Mintcake

Hard to say. I can tell you that many who are originally from Cincinnati seem to have very close families. Case in point - my next door neighbor is one of 10 children. All I believe still live here. Their daughter moved onto our street. Another daughter lives one hour north. It upsets them greatly that their son lives 2 hours south in Kentucky and they aren't able to see him on a regular basis (the other kids are there at least once a week for an extended period from what I've seen). They are a very friendly bunch, and very happy doing most things together as a family. We mainly see them outside hanging out together, or when they have been baking and bring over cookies, or brownies, or bread for us.

In contrast, most of my family is out west.

repeat offender

Again people are just people all over the world what would you answer if I asked what are the differences between north and southern UK ? curious

britex01

I base opinion of this type on personal experience, and I am sure that not every family falls under the same type cast. In my opinion, families in the UK are more often than not more flexible in their attitudes towards their offspring, and such cases are not quite so clingy and 'doctrined' as those I experienced of Texan families.

I plan to meet my wife later this year in the United States to test the ground over there, as it were, over a longer visit. My wife has already lived in the UK but couldn't settle because of ingrained family-cum-godly 'pressures' in TX.

Yes, it is difficult being apart under such circumstances, hence my current sig.

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britex01

I'm sure you would receive a good many answers... ... Start a Thread and see...

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repeat offender

I assume then you have no input ?

Kaffy Mintcake

Why not start the thread as Britex suggested? I'd be interested to read the discussion.

britex01

Yes, likewise. A thread of that type may encourage lengthy opinion and so forth.

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Kaffy Mintcake

Okay - I've started it - now you have to contribute.

britex01

Ah, so I see ... ... But the difference in time zones between me and thee means that right now I'm about ready for my bed. I'll contribute my bit to your new thread when refreshed...

Now look at the fine mess you got me, Olly! ...

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ironporer

I agree. Most northerners are genuinly polite and kind; most southerners are superficially courteous and cliqueish.


Biggest difference I see every day is the amount of trash alongside the roads. In Indiana, OH, or Mo you see very little...down here you barely see any grass for all the McDonalds bags, paper cups, beer cans...let alone the crap houses with crap all over the mud (no grass because the tied up hounds have killed it all).

The Jesus (pronounces Jayyyyzzzus) preaching crowd (the same ones that f**k anything that walks and would lie and steal you blind if you let'em) get's really old as well. Church here is not so much a time for introspection and examination of one's character as a social event...to see who you can screw when your wife ain't looking....or to impress your boss/friends/etc.

Tracym

People are people all over the wold - but cultures and attitudes certainly differ in different parts of the world.

And the US is quite large - imo large enough to have a few different cultures.

AngloDreamer

Yes thanks for your response, I have had some thoughts on it.
I am very close to my friend in NC but we are not yet engaged as such, I need to save more money although I feel I will not require an enormous amount. I just want to be with her. Aw

I am 45 and she is 48 and she has 2 adult children who no longer live with her, a daughter of 30 and a son of 20 (adult but he cannot legally have a beer? Oh well I am sure he has a sly one the little devil)

Myself, I have a 42 yo sis and 9 yo niece but don't see much and a mum who is 77 but in good health. I see her a lot as she lives near me. My sis lives further away.
I often feel my mum does not want me to go to USA cos she thinks I will not come back, but that will not stop me. Mothers eh ??
Btw, I have no children myself.
I feel /know my NC friend would have difficulty emotionally leaving her many brothers and sisters (some half) and her own mom who is 80 and not in good health at all.

I feel that it is more likely that I would adapt to life in NC than my girlfriend would adapt to life here. She has a passport which I believe is unusual for a US citizen. I am more traveled than her but I would like her to at least visit the UK and Europe at least once to see our culture so that she can understand me better. (Sorry, It is late. I could have explained that more imaginatively)

I live in a town 8 miles east of Manchester UK population about 58.000 but still part of the sprawling city . Population 2.5 Million and probably 1.5 million takeaway kebab and curry places and 250,000 pubs.

She lives in a town (village by my standards) population 4,500 in western NC.
There are so many cultural differences. I would be ashamed to bring her here. Swearing, so much litter on the streets, drunks, badly behaved teenagers etc. She wouldn't stand a chance on her own here.
She would need to bring her shotguns. (She really does own 2 of them which she inherited from her father)
Apart from a brief spell in Monroe on the outskirts of Charlotte (which she hated) she is a mountain girl at heart.

Sure I could take her to the nicer areas of the UK but that's what tourists do.
I want to see the Grand Canyon and many US places and I am sure I will do that one day but not my no 1 priority. She is.

She lives in a dry town and it is so peaceful compared to what I am used to , hardly any crime, bit religious but nobody forces it on you.
People have religious plaques in their front yards and in the mountain region not too far away I seen large houses or mansions flying a confederate flag with a natzi swastika on top left corner.
Globe mountain. Bit disconcerting that was. I think illegal in Germany.
I decided to not comment to her on that despite my feelings.

However I get the feeling that it is advantageous to belong to a baptist church if you want a social life. or a reasonable job.
There seems to be thousands of baptist churches in her part of the world btw. If ya don't like one I guess there is always one around the corner LoL.

Can't find a pub though.
If I could I would go to church on a Sunday and confess my sins.

i.e I had 3 pints on a Friday night and I gave one to a 20 year old child.

Regards.

Tracym

Hi, nice to meet you.

lol, it's not unusual for yanks to have passports, many of us do. There're probably quite a few that don't also - but it's not unusual to have one.

Your friend sounds like she lives in quite an ..... interesting area. I've never actually seen a town with religious plaques in the front yards - and I've CERTAINLY never seen anyone flying a flag with a swastika on it! Of course, I haven't been all over the U.S. But a swastika???!!! Confederate flags are still around in the south, but most places don't have a lot of nazis. yikes.

I dunno - as long as you don't mind "having" to "be" Baptist, and don't mind conforming, perhaps it'll work out fine for you. You sound very fond of her indeed.

Just ramblings of a yank - hope they're helpful...