Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

I agree JJ. Getting back to Mallory. The post has a point, not one I necessarily agree with... I am sure many people do think that about people who come to the USA and then want to leave. As others including Eng43 have posted the sad irony is many of us came for reasons other than the Hollywood ideal of America.

It always strikes me as strange when I hear the 'Mallory' version of events because people really do seem to think of the USA in those terms. But what to me underlies it is a deep sense of jealously. Something you can't quite put your finger on but it is there.

Myself I think its a beautiful country and having visited all 50 States and lived in more than 8 of them over 20 + years, I think I can safely comment. However, it does not change the fact that I don't want to be there anymore.
Not because of lack of success. If I followed that side of me I would most definitely stay in the USA.

It is more a sense of never having really belonged. I know someone else said it on another thread. Going back to the UK is like putting on a pair of your favourite slippers.

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

I agree confused, I have lived in the US for 34 years, and had a wonderful life for many years. After my divorce, when I was on my own, I tried to continue, and make it on my own, but came to realize that the reasons I am here are gone, except for my daughter, who is grown and having a life of her own, and rarely has time for her mother these days. So I am going home, to where my parents are, and where I feel comfortable. My daughter knows where to find me, and I may even come for a visit, but I am living the rest of my life at home...
Jackie

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

How can you say that about anyone. You don't know the poster. You have no idea whatsoever what brought anyone to the US.

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

You've got that right, ldyinlv. Denial about just about everything is so prevalent here.

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

Must be American :rofl:

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

Hi All - scary indeed. I left the UK in '93 on secondment to Malaysia following the death of my first wife. Lived in Malaysia for 5 enjoyable years and met my wonderful wife there. We moved to Oz in '98 for work reasons. Oz was ok in but never really settled even though business was successful In dec 2009 we moved back to Malaysia as the wife's mum was poorly she unfortunately passed away in Oct last year. So we now have to decide where to live. We had always planned on NZ (we have Oz PR so also NZ PR) but we are now tempted by the UK but SCARED of making the wrong decision. For business NZ is the way to go as I have a good reputation in Oz/NZ. But I would love to go home (I think) where we have family and friends and my wife has loved it every time we have visited. We are going back for 5 weeks in Feb and I am hoping something happens to either tell us UK is the place we want to be OR puts us off and we head off to NZ. BIG BIG BIG decision - returning to Malaysia was a mistake (other than the family aspects) and we don't want to make another one. We dont want to ping pong we REALLY want our own house again.. I know no one can really advise just wanted to share with other scared people

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

Good luck in whatever you decide to do. Here is my take on it. When you get back to the UK in Feb. go to as many places as you are able, not just sitting around supping cups of tea with relo's :lol:

Get out and see just how BEAUTIFUL our country is and get into your feelings. Take a deep breath at the top of a mountain or in a little village and drink it all in and ask yourself if you could see youself living there for the rest of your life. And of course your wife really should feel the same way too.

All the very best. :)

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Good luck making the final decision. Have fun in February. :thumbup:

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

Doesn't this mean that both sides of it are discussed though? You may not agree with the other posters comments - but are you all in this forum just looking for reasurance that you've made the right decision because it involves moving home to the UK, or are you actually wanting to hear opinions of people who have maybe done it and regretted it, or just other opinions in general?

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

Yeah but it's usually people with no desire to move back and happy where they are just popping in here to give a bit of grief, hardly useful at all. If they love where they are so much and don't want to go back, why can't they stick to their usual area of the boards and leave the returnees alone? No one asked them to come in and make trouble. We aren't in the OZ, US, or wherever is is sections going on about this stuff, we leave them to bask in their love of the new land ;)

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

But its not always people who love where they live - and having popped into this forum a few times, from an outside perspective as someone who lives in the UK and is curious why people are coming back, it does all seem like pats on the back to people who are moving home from people who aren't there yet. (not all, but a lot).

I understand what you mean, but surely some people are on here asking for a bit of input? Or are they actually just wanting reassurance from likeminded people and not seeking other view points?

Just asking - not having a go.

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I think that offering an opinion when it is asked for is perfectly fine and actually what everyone is looking for when they ask. But that's not what I was reacting to. Out of the blue, one person accused another of being shallow and greedy, and got very snarky about that person's desire to move home. It just seemed uncalled for.

Personally I'm interested in everyone's opinions as I make my decision - especially those who have experienced America and the UK, as they are the ones who understand the good and bad of both places. I just think that being nasty and dismissive when offering that opinion is unhelpful to say the least.

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I wasn't saying it as you Mrs G. others who aren't in UK or who are just trying to get a rise out of people. Like Sally says.
Dunroving is in UK too and manages to be very balanced and helpful even though he has a desire to move back to the US, and if thats his desire who are we to squash that, we don't pick on him and tell him he's wrong for wanting that. We wish him well.

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Fair enough ladies - I was just asking cause it can seem a bit one sided in here sometimes. Sally - I'm sure there could have been a different quote for me to highlight - I wasn't trying to single you out at all that part just kind of highlighted what I was trying to ask about.

Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
 

well said, it is never and easy decision but these discussions help greatly, some people love their new home i loved the staes for about 17 years and now after 20 i am sooo excited to move home for so many reasons... the people, the way of life, family, friends.... we all love England and at some point we were happy where we were but only after living in both for a long time can you truly decide and we all do what feels right and want to go where feels like home..... this is a supportive thread and i like it that way.. we are all entitled to opinions, but we also like to feel good about what we are doing.. good luck everyone , hopefully i wll be home this summer, everything is ready just the money issue... work and save, work and save... cant wait to leave the fake materialistic country this has become...:D