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Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by dunroving
(Post 8825435)
Been there (a few times!) and one thing I learned is you just can't waste energy beating yourself up about the money thing - you can't get it back so there's no point. The timing of my moves has meant not only the cost of moving, but huge losses on house sales/purchases, huge losses on exchange rate, blahdeblahdeblah, but you just have to move on and don't let it eat away at you. I can't do anything about the fact my peers have all paid off their mortgages and I have 22 years left of a 25 year mortgage (I'm 53) - though it does piss me off when I get the sneering "You must be loaded on a university lecturer's salary". Grrrrr ....
- See? See you how easy it is to get into the negative thinking rut? Don't do it!! ;) I suppose we realise we have to put up with less, can't worry about whats done. Enjoy Your Weekend. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Well I too pondered it forever.... I am 32 and moved to South Florida when I was 12 So I grew up in the U.S for the most part. with trips to England however over the past few years I have been back every year and each time it was really hard for me to leave. i went back again this past August and all the day to day anxiety I suffer here in the states was gone. i felt "at peace, and at home" I finally felt like i belonged somewhere after feeling lost for years. i have been on anti-anxiety medication since i was 14 xanex, valium, anti-depressants but when i was in the UK i was able to not have piece of medication until the day before I had to fly back to florida where my life was just in a shambles... so i packed up all I had left of 1 broken engagment, and once a marriage and moved to my mom in South Carolina (which is hell on earth) 2 weeks ago because the 2 of us are selling it all and finally going home to the rest of our large family... i finally got that feeling of home and it was back in the UK ... so thats the leap i am making, just getting the dog prepped now... It is very scary and I will miss the beach and friends, but i have so many friends that are constantly in touch with me in the UK and In Florida life is grand if u can afford to sit on the beach all day, but when u are wearing a suit and driving in a car with crappy Air -con.. in 95 degrees and missing your family and the people in general.. its all a bit different... just my thoughts... good luck and follow your gut, there is a reason to feel like you need to go home so go with it..
Wish all of you the best , time to get excited and go home!:) |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by hayleyatfla
(Post 8986121)
Well I too pondered it forever.... I am 32 and moved to South Florida when I was 12 So I grew up in the U.S for the most part. with trips to England however over the past few years I have been back every year and each time it was really hard for me to leave. i went back again this past August and all the day to day anxiety I suffer here in the states was gone. i felt "at peace, and at home" I finally felt like i belonged somewhere after feeling lost for years. i have been on anti-anxiety medication since i was 14 xanex, valium, anti-depressants but when i was in the UK i was able to not have piece of medication until the day before I had to fly back to florida where my life was just in a shambles... so i packed up all I had left of 1 broken engagment, and once a marriage and moved to my mom in South Carolina (which is hell on earth) 2 weeks ago because the 2 of us are selling it all and finally going home to the rest of our large family... i finally got that feeling of home and it was back in the UK ... so thats the leap i am making, just getting the dog prepped now... It is very scary and I will miss the beach and friends, but i have so many friends that are constantly in touch with me in the UK and In Florida life is grand if u can afford to sit on the beach all day, but when u are wearing a suit and driving in a car with crappy Air -con.. in 95 degrees and missing your family and the people in general.. its all a bit different... just my thoughts... good luck and follow your gut, there is a reason to feel like you need to go home so go with it..
Wish all of you the best , time to get excited and go home!:) So glad you have found your place ... Gabriella |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by Mummy in the foothills
(Post 8824978)
The longer you stay the bigger the financial hit, you'll buy more furniture, cars, the kids will get settled into the lifestyle. We have tons of stuff to sort through and get rid of. All those bits and pieces you end up with.
For that reason, I'd say best to go sooner rather than later. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by Gabgoeshome
(Post 8986153)
WOW ,good luck :)
So glad you have found your place ... Gabriella |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by Sally Redux
(Post 8986161)
That's where we are. I don't think we can go back now.
For that reason, I'd say best to go sooner rather than later. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by hayleyatfla
(Post 8986121)
Well I too pondered it forever.... I am 32 and moved to South Florida when I was 12 So I grew up in the U.S for the most part. with trips to England however over the past few years I have been back every year and each time it was really hard for me to leave. i went back again this past August and all the day to day anxiety I suffer here in the states was gone. i felt "at peace, and at home" I finally felt like i belonged somewhere after feeling lost for years. i have been on anti-anxiety medication since i was 14 xanex, valium, anti-depressants but when i was in the UK i was able to not have piece of medication until the day before I had to fly back to florida where my life was just in a shambles... so i packed up all I had left of 1 broken engagment, and once a marriage and moved to my mom in South Carolina (which is hell on earth) 2 weeks ago because the 2 of us are selling it all and finally going home to the rest of our large family... i finally got that feeling of home and it was back in the UK ... so thats the leap i am making, just getting the dog prepped now... It is very scary and I will miss the beach and friends, but i have so many friends that are constantly in touch with me in the UK and In Florida life is grand if u can afford to sit on the beach all day, but when u are wearing a suit and driving in a car with crappy Air -con.. in 95 degrees and missing your family and the people in general.. its all a bit different... just my thoughts... good luck and follow your gut, there is a reason to feel like you need to go home so go with it..
Wish all of you the best , time to get excited and go home!:) Good for you, I came here in my late teens, its not a place I wanted to be, but the whole family came, what was I supposed to do. I can relate to that feeling of peace, I feel the same way when I go back, it just feels safer and something feels so right, some Brits will say its got worse of over there but thats nothing new, Ive hard that for years and still I feel safer, other than war zones nothing compares to the amount of guns and murders in this country. A life of anti-depressant drugs and beaches has no appeal when compared to real peace and feeling good. Life can only get better. I wish you well. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by garyp
(Post 8823366)
Did you get cold feet when you believed you wanted to return to the UK and it came down to booking the flights in case you are making the wrong decision? Keep in looking at flights but not managed to go through with it. I am not 100% happy here in OZ and my kids would like to go back. its just the wife who wants to stay as we have only been here 6 months. I dont believe in the you have to give it 2 years before you settle as I realised pretty early it was the wrong decision to come. but I realise it will all be over once I book those flights. Think i need counciling again :confused:
Then at 6 months we both decided to return to the UK. We were both scared - we were worried we might get back home and regret our choice we also worried our family and friends would think we were crazy. BUT the second we got of the plane at heathrow we knew our decision was right and now 2 years later we are both still really happy with our UK life! We love the seasons, the green countryside, the history, the people, the TV need I go on... and are off to cornwall next week for a winter break by the beach! Follow your heart! |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by clairemoir
(Post 8986869)
Well, my experience was that I knew in 2 weeks I wanted to come home. Hubby and I agreed to give it 6 months - which I found extremely testing!
Then at 6 months we both decided to return to the UK. We were both scared - we were worried we might get back home and regret our choice we also worried our family and friends would think we were crazy. BUT the second we got of the plane at heathrow we knew our decision was right and now 2 years later we are both still really happy with our UK life! We love the seasons, the green countryside, the history, the people, the TV need I go on... and are off to cornwall next week for a winter break by the beach! Follow your heart! The people are most important, you have something in common that cant be duplicated, everything else is a bonus. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by Fish n Chips 56
(Post 8986646)
Good for you, I came here in my late teens, its not a place I wanted to be, but the whole family came, what was I supposed to do.
I can relate to that feeling of peace, I feel the same way when I go back, it just feels safer and something feels so right, some Brits will say its got worse of over there but thats nothing new, Ive hard that for years and still I feel safer, other than war zones nothing compares to the amount of guns and murders in this country. A life of anti-depressant drugs and beaches has no appeal when compared to real peace and feeling good. Life can only get better. I wish you well. Thanks Fish 'n ' Chips... All countries are messed up in some way the economy and jobs here are no better, in the 90's and early 2000's i was doing alright here but as i get older i want home back the best way I can describe it is like "slipping on a pair of old cozy slippers"... i tried it here for 20 years and i now know i am happier jumping on the no# 50 bus into birmigham city center with a bunch of mates thats have still stayed in touch and met up with me on all my visits over the years and pub hopping till its time for a curry (: Just gotta find some kid of job here in the middle of South Carolina to get me on the boat in August ... thanks for the kind words mate :thumbsup: |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Good question by OP,
No cold feet for me, slightly chilly maybe. I had been looking forward to this move back for 18 yrs, back home (although there was one particularly trip back and a wet weekend in London that showed me the benefits of a mild winter in North Carolina). I had been happy to live in USA with DH, we had a nice life there and used the opportunity to visit about 40 states. We were just average working folks, we didn't become financially rich (but that wasn't the plan) but our lives were enriched by the experience. When things were good they were good, but the summer heat became daunting, prospect of high cost of retirement (particularly healthcare) was intimidating but mainly the feeling that home and belonging was here in UK was what brought us back, me absolutely ready, DH more reserved because of the negative aspects of UK (he had got used to the negatives of USA) When we first got back to England we saw warts and all, but since then have found the nicer side of life here and are quite happy. Would I move back to USA ? possibly for a limited time, I bear no grudge or resentment, i enjoyed the experience, but no, I do not dream or have ambition to move back there in the way I always felt I wanted, needed, to move back to UK. Isn't that so odd, so many of us just having this 'feeling' that UK is home and that's where we need to be, even Hayley and Fish and others that left at fairly early ages when one would have thought they would have grown into it, or acclimated, as presumably their parents expected. This forum is such a fascinating insight into human nature, thanks to all those who open the door to peek inside your hearts and minds. I feel privileged to share with you. Best Wishes to all on your journey's. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
That's WonderfulJ.J , I am glad things are going well i cant wait to back there and its always nice to read the positives.. thanks for sharing and keep enjoying home xoxo:D
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Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by J.J
(Post 8989306)
Isn't that so odd, so many of us just having this 'feeling' that UK is home and that's where we need to be, even Hayley and Fish and others that left at fairly early ages when one would have thought they would have grown into it, or acclimated, as presumably their parents expected. This forum is such a fascinating insight into human nature, thanks to all those who open the door to peek inside your hearts and minds. I feel privileged to share with you. Best Wishes to all on your journey's. |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
I sometimes worry that we are making the wrong decision.
I look at my eldest son's room ,all his belongings and his gadgets he has worked hard saving up for ...all in his cozy 12 year olds nest lol ! I know at 39 that this is not the place for him ,but he has sticky feet :( My younger son is 7 and excited to leave this small town , our little girl is just turning 2 so no problem there . The biggest reason we are leaving though (as so many have said before me ) is family and the feeling that we do not want to grow old here . Life for the kids is lovely in some respects ...but not for us :( I am hoping that by re-locating to Dorset (this time )we will find a happy place for ALL of us . Good luck to all of us here :) |
Re: Scared of Making Wrong Decision
Originally Posted by Fish n Chips 56
(Post 8825503)
Dunroving hit the nail on the head for me, Im the same age and wished my house was paid for too, Man I hate all the good luck stories people tell me, everybody seems to do well, what about us?
I suppose we realise we have to put up with less, can't worry about whats done. Enjoy Your Weekend. |
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