OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
May 3rd 2010, 9:33 am
#2986
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,606
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
This time, next Sunday we will be mid-flight - I must admit that this evening, even though I am so excited to seeing family, my sons (its been almost three and half years since I saw my sons and my grandchildren (I have one now that is just a few weeks old) - and for the first time over the last few months I felt a little apprehensive.
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
Its good to ramble (think out loud) Lara, hopefully all of this will work out, Ive heard it said that 99% of what we worry about never comes to pass, snd thats a good thing, also ask yourself questions about what if you stay, that might help you.
Everything has a way of working out for the best, Im a firm believer in that, Wow only a week left, many of us wish we were in that situation. My Best wishes go to You.
May 3rd 2010, 9:41 am
#2987
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,606
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Eastern Dawn (Peigi) I have just read your last post and it made me cry, you have given up so much to acheive your dream, I truly...with all my heart...hope your circumstances change for the better soon. I have thought about you many times during these last few months and have spoken with my husband about your struggle: most of all, I have to say that I know now that I could never go back on my own without my husband by my side to help me, I just do not have your strength. Our financial situation is pretty dire and, unless we have some luck, may never allow me to come home.
Hang in there and know that many people on this forum think, and pray, for your well being and success, often. Elizabeth
Hang in there and know that many people on this forum think, and pray, for your well being and success, often. Elizabeth
I have tears rolling down my cheeks too, there have been so many times that this lady has amazed me, she never gives up, and I know Ive said it before but she is an inspiration to us all, there are no other words for it, I just hope Peigi her husband and pooches can be together in Scotland soon.
I hope you have a Wonderful week Peigi.
May 3rd 2010, 10:53 am
#2988
WhiteRabbit
Joined: Dec 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 1,480
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Rebecajo...
Its nice to see you come out and say hello, I wonder how many others there are lurking around, I was a lurker too, then one day I had things I just had to say.
Parents, Its a great question, we all have a similar but different situations, here's mine.
The writing was on the wall for me many years ago, I saw stories of people going medically bankrupt over 20 years ago, that was all I needed to convince me to leave, My heart was still in England anyway.
I was planning my second emigration attempt 10 years ago, then I couldn't leave as I saw my Mum wasn't well, so I stuck around and helped take car of her, she passed away a year ago, then I was left with My Dad, I was thinking he might make it another eight to ten years so I was hoping to convince him to come with us, then all of a sudden he passed away, Now I'm faced with selling his home and mine too at some point, its a long job, I'm already into it over 6 months and only a hand full of lookers, lots of work and worries, meanwhile I hope I don't get sick and go broke in the process, I've already lost value in my home which exceeds what I will get from my parenst estate.
So I couldn't do what you are asking, at least I couldn't leave a sick parent, I did leave them when they were 62 but there was other family around to help them at that time, hopefully you have some family to help take care of your parents, even if not you should do what your heart tells you to do, or take care of Number one so to speak, My Dad left the UK and his mother when she was 65 but she also had other family to help, still it was a shock to her, he moved us here for a what he thought would be a better life for us all, and yes some of my family are happy here, it just wasn't for me, to be perfectly honest with you I will hate leaving my two sisters and their American families but as I see it its leave or deal with the chance of losing everything I've worked for all my life, I feel that my wife has given up a lot for me and my family, I think I owe her a better life with some security and I feel that England offers that.
I too have doubts in the back of my mind like others have mentioned in the last day or so, but that is normal thinking, maybe its a good thing, lets face it my plans could go belly up, Nobody knows what is around the corner or what's in store for tomorrow, I just hope its good.
These decisions arent easy but who said life was easy? hahhaaaaa
I'm sure I haven't helped you much, but sometimes its good therapy to write things down and think things out.
I certainly wish you well.
Its nice to see you come out and say hello, I wonder how many others there are lurking around, I was a lurker too, then one day I had things I just had to say.
Parents, Its a great question, we all have a similar but different situations, here's mine.
The writing was on the wall for me many years ago, I saw stories of people going medically bankrupt over 20 years ago, that was all I needed to convince me to leave, My heart was still in England anyway.
I was planning my second emigration attempt 10 years ago, then I couldn't leave as I saw my Mum wasn't well, so I stuck around and helped take car of her, she passed away a year ago, then I was left with My Dad, I was thinking he might make it another eight to ten years so I was hoping to convince him to come with us, then all of a sudden he passed away, Now I'm faced with selling his home and mine too at some point, its a long job, I'm already into it over 6 months and only a hand full of lookers, lots of work and worries, meanwhile I hope I don't get sick and go broke in the process, I've already lost value in my home which exceeds what I will get from my parenst estate.
So I couldn't do what you are asking, at least I couldn't leave a sick parent, I did leave them when they were 62 but there was other family around to help them at that time, hopefully you have some family to help take care of your parents, even if not you should do what your heart tells you to do, or take care of Number one so to speak, My Dad left the UK and his mother when she was 65 but she also had other family to help, still it was a shock to her, he moved us here for a what he thought would be a better life for us all, and yes some of my family are happy here, it just wasn't for me, to be perfectly honest with you I will hate leaving my two sisters and their American families but as I see it its leave or deal with the chance of losing everything I've worked for all my life, I feel that my wife has given up a lot for me and my family, I think I owe her a better life with some security and I feel that England offers that.
I too have doubts in the back of my mind like others have mentioned in the last day or so, but that is normal thinking, maybe its a good thing, lets face it my plans could go belly up, Nobody knows what is around the corner or what's in store for tomorrow, I just hope its good.
These decisions arent easy but who said life was easy? hahhaaaaa
I'm sure I haven't helped you much, but sometimes its good therapy to write things down and think things out.
I certainly wish you well.
May 3rd 2010, 10:53 am
#2989
WhiteRabbit
Joined: Dec 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 1,480
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Hi Rebecca and hubby, you will find this the most caring and supportive thread!! So welcome and do chip in with any questions.
When you emigrate or marry somebody from another country it is always going to be hard. Somebody is going to be left behind somewhere, children, parents, family of all kinds........it is extremely hard being the "leaver" and just as hard for the people left behind.
All you can do is what you think is right at the time, but unless your whole family moves or lives in the same country and you have ABSOLUTELY no ties to the other country then there are no winners.
Some of us have had to make decisions and compromises, but we will always be torn between two loves.
Sad fact of life..........
When you emigrate or marry somebody from another country it is always going to be hard. Somebody is going to be left behind somewhere, children, parents, family of all kinds........it is extremely hard being the "leaver" and just as hard for the people left behind.
All you can do is what you think is right at the time, but unless your whole family moves or lives in the same country and you have ABSOLUTELY no ties to the other country then there are no winners.
Some of us have had to make decisions and compromises, but we will always be torn between two loves.
Sad fact of life..........
May 3rd 2010, 10:55 am
#2990
WhiteRabbit
Joined: Dec 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 1,480
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Thank you Elizabeth for your kind thoughts and to all the others who have urged me on, have listened to my problems and have supported me in the past months.
Today is a bad day for me, not sure if it is the thought of another day of the verbal abuse that is flung at me from a certain manager or the fact that my wedding anniversary is coming up this month, so please forgive the self centeredness and feeling sorry for myself.
My God and I have little conversations through out the day and I do realize that I am very lucky to be where I do not have to worry about not having food, that health care is available at no cost, that I don't have to worry about bombs going off, or that my children and grandchildren are going to be abducted and killed, that my health is still reasonable good and that I have good friends both here on the forum and here in Scotland.
Well better get ready for work, hope everyone has a brilliant day and that all your dreams come true.
Today is a bad day for me, not sure if it is the thought of another day of the verbal abuse that is flung at me from a certain manager or the fact that my wedding anniversary is coming up this month, so please forgive the self centeredness and feeling sorry for myself.
My God and I have little conversations through out the day and I do realize that I am very lucky to be where I do not have to worry about not having food, that health care is available at no cost, that I don't have to worry about bombs going off, or that my children and grandchildren are going to be abducted and killed, that my health is still reasonable good and that I have good friends both here on the forum and here in Scotland.
Well better get ready for work, hope everyone has a brilliant day and that all your dreams come true.
I hope today is a better day for you. And all those after.
May 3rd 2010, 7:00 pm
#2991
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,197
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
DDL--you are so right when you say these intercontinental relationships are not always so romantic as they may appear on the movies etc! Difficulties arise, one partner is always not in his/her own country, and therefore not truly "at home," we are torn and we always will be....as so many others here have also said.
(Actually I thought I had already submitted a post responding to these words of DDL's, but I can't see it now. If I'm repeating myself, I'm sorry!)
Welcome to RebeccaJo! You will find friendly ears here...
Sad to hear you so down, ED/Peigi, though it is quite understandable, in your circumstances...your courage and gumption inspire us all, as you know!
Lara, what courage you, husband and son have--and how exciting! Do keep us posted if you can...
Fish, it's very interesting what you say about seeing Britain as the place where there is a "better life" and "more security" --this concept would stagger most Americans, of course! But the anxiety about medical care, and "what if...", the fear of losing it all because of medical bills, especially for the uninsured, is a huge burden for people here.
Wing, you say "the weather is a bit unsettled.." you must definitely be back in Britain, then!
(Actually I thought I had already submitted a post responding to these words of DDL's, but I can't see it now. If I'm repeating myself, I'm sorry!)
Welcome to RebeccaJo! You will find friendly ears here...
Sad to hear you so down, ED/Peigi, though it is quite understandable, in your circumstances...your courage and gumption inspire us all, as you know!
Lara, what courage you, husband and son have--and how exciting! Do keep us posted if you can...
Fish, it's very interesting what you say about seeing Britain as the place where there is a "better life" and "more security" --this concept would stagger most Americans, of course! But the anxiety about medical care, and "what if...", the fear of losing it all because of medical bills, especially for the uninsured, is a huge burden for people here.
Wing, you say "the weather is a bit unsettled.." you must definitely be back in Britain, then!
May 3rd 2010, 8:09 pm
#2992
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Nottinghamshire UK > Florida > UK 10days >Ireland > BACK IN NOTTINGHAMSHIRE UK
Posts: 209
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
This time, next Sunday we will be mid-flight - I must admit that this evening, even though I am so excited to seeing family, my sons (its been almost three and half years since I saw my sons and my grandchildren (I have one now that is just a few weeks old) - and for the first time over the last few months I felt a little apprehensive.
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
Lara
It's only natural that you would feel apprehensive. It is a big move but I'm sure once you are home and with your family all those fears will go away. There is lots of support in the Uk while people are looking for work so i'm sure once you are back things will come together.
I know what you mean about the age thing. I'm 54 and my husband is 58 but i still dont know where all those years went. I dont feel any different than i did years ago and until i do, i just think age is just a number and it's how you feel inside that counts.
It won't be long now. Try and enjoy your last few days before your new life begins. Kids are very adaptable so try not to worry too much about your daughter. That's coming from someone who cried uncontrollably all the way home and most of the day once she had left her son on his first day at school. I was such a mess, he was so small for his age. All i kept thinking was if he didn't like it he would hate me for the rest of his life. How extreme was that. Everyone still reminds me of that day lol.
Take care and best wishes for a bright new future.
Chris
May 3rd 2010, 8:24 pm
#2993
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Nottinghamshire UK > Florida > UK 10days >Ireland > BACK IN NOTTINGHAMSHIRE UK
Posts: 209
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Thank you Elizabeth for your kind thoughts and to all the others who have urged me on, have listened to my problems and have supported me in the past months.
Today is a bad day for me, not sure if it is the thought of another day of the verbal abuse that is flung at me from a certain manager or the fact that my wedding anniversary is coming up this month, so please forgive the self centeredness and feeling sorry for myself.
My God and I have little conversations through out the day and I do realize that I am very lucky to be where I do not have to worry about not having food, that health care is available at no cost, that I don't have to worry about bombs going off, or that my children and grandchildren are going to be abducted and killed, that my health is still reasonable good and that I have good friends both here on the forum and here in Scotland.
Well better get ready for work, hope everyone has a brilliant day and that all your dreams come true.
Today is a bad day for me, not sure if it is the thought of another day of the verbal abuse that is flung at me from a certain manager or the fact that my wedding anniversary is coming up this month, so please forgive the self centeredness and feeling sorry for myself.
My God and I have little conversations through out the day and I do realize that I am very lucky to be where I do not have to worry about not having food, that health care is available at no cost, that I don't have to worry about bombs going off, or that my children and grandchildren are going to be abducted and killed, that my health is still reasonable good and that I have good friends both here on the forum and here in Scotland.
Well better get ready for work, hope everyone has a brilliant day and that all your dreams come true.
Hi ED
I hope you have had a better day today, and hopefully you find a new job soon that is more satisfying and fulfilling. Hopefully you wont have any more anniversaries apart from your husband and he joins you very soon.
It sounds like you have had your share of ups and downs in life so i feel it's now your time for good things to come your way.
Take care Chris
May 3rd 2010, 8:52 pm
#2994
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,198
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Denise you are so right in everything you say here, You especially being American will have the culture shock to deal with maybe a little more then me and so many others who have been out here for 30 years or more, but I am sure you will quickly get into the swing of things......
May 3rd 2010, 9:18 pm
#2995
Home Sweet Home
Joined: Jan 2010
Location: Surrey, England
Posts: 5,128
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
My Dear Lara, I can definetly relate to where you are emmotionally at this moment. Although I did not have kids to worry about when I arrived, I arrived with £1,500.00 in my pocket, a friend I had met through the internet to stay with (although I did have to pay £80.00 per week) and two suitcases and lots of emmotions. I think the panic started to creap in after I had finally come out of the jet lag fog. I fully expected and had planned to get employment within weeks of arriving, except it took months and unfortunately I took the first position that was offered to me. Which has turned out to be a complete nightmare. I am still trying to find my way and I find it difficult to talk with friends that I have met since I arrived as they have no way of understanding what drives you to come back to your homeland, or why you would leave your husband, kids, and grandchildren to live here, therefore you add the loneliness to the other things that you are enduring. It has been a very long and difficult 7 months and there are times when I feel almost like giving up.
I have a long list of regrets in my life, I regret trusting a company with the money that I worked long and hard to accumulate and who with greed and no thought to those they left in their wake, stole all from us. I regret when we sold the business and house in Western Canada we did not come to UK then and instead purchased a house in P.E.I. and investing our money in that company. I regret leaving my husband of twenty years back in Canada, the list is long and complicated but the one thing I do not regret is coming back to Scotland.
You are much luckier than I, you have your family here, your husband and children will be with you to support you. Just remember at the end of the "honeymoon period", you will feel deflated and empty, but remember you will have everything that means everything to you, with you. So good luck, you will be fine.
I have a long list of regrets in my life, I regret trusting a company with the money that I worked long and hard to accumulate and who with greed and no thought to those they left in their wake, stole all from us. I regret when we sold the business and house in Western Canada we did not come to UK then and instead purchased a house in P.E.I. and investing our money in that company. I regret leaving my husband of twenty years back in Canada, the list is long and complicated but the one thing I do not regret is coming back to Scotland.
You are much luckier than I, you have your family here, your husband and children will be with you to support you. Just remember at the end of the "honeymoon period", you will feel deflated and empty, but remember you will have everything that means everything to you, with you. So good luck, you will be fine.
Take care and sending positive vibes your way.......
Barb
May 3rd 2010, 9:49 pm
#2996
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2009
Location: Back home now in my home town in England U.K. after 36 years in U.S. now retired and loving it,
Posts: 3,208
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
This time, next Sunday we will be mid-flight - I must admit that this evening, even though I am so excited to seeing family, my sons (its been almost three and half years since I saw my sons and my grandchildren (I have one now that is just a few weeks old) - and for the first time over the last few months I felt a little apprehensive.
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
When we arrive on home ground, we will have basically about 1,000 pounds in our pockets and 15 boxes filled with just over 6 years' worth of ... memories and "stuff" on their way to us. I think I have a little panic going on here!! the "what if's"!! ... what if my daughter hates school there ... what if there are bullies in the school ... what if she struggles there with schoolwork ... what if I can't get work ... Im 53 ... it's going to be harder to find work ... (How the heck am I 53 anyway?? that crept up suddenly!! I shouldnt even be on the 50's 60's thread!!)
I need to go to bed and get some sleep - I'll be fine tomorrow - just rambling the way I do ..
I am sure I will be where you are now in my mind when it comes to my flight being only one week from taking off,
Just try and relax and enjoy your last week, and visit some old places in your town where you live over here, go out for a nice dinner at your favorite restaurant, just kick back and dont worry about a thing,
Soon you will be in UK where you know you want to be,
Take good care,
Rodney.
May 4th 2010, 11:42 pm
#2997
Just Joined
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Allentown, Pa. U.S.A.
Posts: 9
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
Well, my wife and I were married in '04 on a marriage visa. She lived in Scotland when we met. We have decided to plan on moving to Scotland where her family is, and I will leave my family here in the States. This won't happen for a few years yet as we want to work until we're both 62 (5 years from now). Never to early to start planning. Just to get the dialogue started, I will ask about Social Security. Will it transfer over? I know that many things can change in 5 years. But I also now that time os flying right now. I know there is much more we'll need to know so anything you'd like to share would be welcome. Right now I have to get to bed so I can get up for work. Thank you.
May 5th 2010, 1:32 am
#2998
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
ED.. I am so sorry your new job turned out to be so bad, I hope you soon find a new one, you where so full of hope it must be a great setback to you but once you have one job under the collar others come much easier. Seems like you are having trouble with a manager, they can make life very miserable. Did you move yet or are you still in your old place.
I forget who asked but my husband is still having tests and it will be weeks before they have any idea what is wrong. Its very hard at times. I am trying to keep everything together as he is not able to do things at the moment. You never realize what it takes to keep a place looking good.
Rebeccajo...Leaving your parents behind is really hard. I had lost my Dad before I came to the US but my Mum and all my family where back in the UK. It wasnt hard to start with my Mum was in her early 60's but as she got older it did get worse. You have to take into consideration what your parents are like. My Mum was not very sociable and was very outspoken so did not make many friends so as she got older she got more isolated. She was also stubborn would not wear her glasses or a hearing aid which would have been a great help to her. She did come to visit me on many occasions.
I got very homesick I always was but the older she got the more guilty if felt. Those are all the things you have to take into account. How many relatives do you have in the US. Your son is young so you really dont know where in the US he will end up.
All I can say is take the next two years to plan and then try it.
I forget who asked but my husband is still having tests and it will be weeks before they have any idea what is wrong. Its very hard at times. I am trying to keep everything together as he is not able to do things at the moment. You never realize what it takes to keep a place looking good.
Rebeccajo...Leaving your parents behind is really hard. I had lost my Dad before I came to the US but my Mum and all my family where back in the UK. It wasnt hard to start with my Mum was in her early 60's but as she got older it did get worse. You have to take into consideration what your parents are like. My Mum was not very sociable and was very outspoken so did not make many friends so as she got older she got more isolated. She was also stubborn would not wear her glasses or a hearing aid which would have been a great help to her. She did come to visit me on many occasions.
I got very homesick I always was but the older she got the more guilty if felt. Those are all the things you have to take into account. How many relatives do you have in the US. Your son is young so you really dont know where in the US he will end up.
All I can say is take the next two years to plan and then try it.
May 5th 2010, 6:25 am
#2999
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Charleston SC, USA, North Yorkshire, now Malta
Posts: 632
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
I just want to give a quick update from Malta. I am sorry I have not been able to read all the posts, I have been soooooo busy and it wasn't always easy to get internet access. So, for all those who are struggling, torn between two worlds, in a new place homesick or scared, or in an old place feeling trapped and desperate..........take heart, we know that these times are short in the big scheme of our lives, and we know that after they have passed, we look back and either regret our decisions and think them mistakes, or we hopefully realize that they were all for a reason and we did the very best we could, given the facts and awareness we had at that time. That's what I choose to do. And it does all boil down to perspective. Every bad moment does pass, we just think it is lasting an eternity when we are stuck in it. I believe everything is for a reason, it's our need to control it that spoils it for us.
I said all the above because I need to remember it myself too!!
My two weeks here in Malta now have been a whirlwind! The first week was exciting - my sister here with me so we certainly did a ton of sightseeing, and Malta is fascinating, so much to see and do, so much history. Also very European, everyone outside, streets teeming with people going about their lives, or drinking a leisurely cup of coffee/tea at an outdoor cafe, speaking all languages under the sun (Maltese is completely incomprehensible to me!!). Now the second week, with my sister back in the UK, is bringing back all those anxieties on leaving my home and starting anew. Is this what I want to do, is this where I really want to be, what if I can't find work, what if I can't find a flat (which I have only just done today and who knows if I will like living in it?), what if I am penniless, what if I am all alone and no one understands me - how can I survive??????? All the natural worries that come with the territory that we expats have chosen for ourselves.
BUT, a big but, I am realizing that life is an adventure that I can either enjoy or feel depressed about. It is what I choose to make it - and the next 6 months here will definitely show me how courageous I am (or how crazy I am), they will be filled with pain and with pleasure, and THAT IS OK. I will choose to laugh instead of cry and one day maybe I will still turn my life into the blockbuster movie I think it already is Remember everyone, we are all perfect in our imperfections, and we are not alone!!
Time will fly by, we can notice the good moments or the bad ones. So now I am going for breakfast and out into the Malta sunshine and the beautiful blue Mediterranean. What new adventure will I have today?
I will try and post a photo or two soon........ciao ciao 
I said all the above because I need to remember it myself too!!
My two weeks here in Malta now have been a whirlwind! The first week was exciting - my sister here with me so we certainly did a ton of sightseeing, and Malta is fascinating, so much to see and do, so much history. Also very European, everyone outside, streets teeming with people going about their lives, or drinking a leisurely cup of coffee/tea at an outdoor cafe, speaking all languages under the sun (Maltese is completely incomprehensible to me!!). Now the second week, with my sister back in the UK, is bringing back all those anxieties on leaving my home and starting anew. Is this what I want to do, is this where I really want to be, what if I can't find work, what if I can't find a flat (which I have only just done today and who knows if I will like living in it?), what if I am penniless, what if I am all alone and no one understands me - how can I survive??????? All the natural worries that come with the territory that we expats have chosen for ourselves. BUT, a big but, I am realizing that life is an adventure that I can either enjoy or feel depressed about. It is what I choose to make it - and the next 6 months here will definitely show me how courageous I am (or how crazy I am
), they will be filled with pain and with pleasure, and THAT IS OK. I will choose to laugh instead of cry and one day maybe I will still turn my life into the blockbuster movie I think it already is Remember everyone, we are all perfect in our imperfections, and we are not alone!! Time will fly by, we can notice the good moments or the bad ones. So now I am going for breakfast and out into the Malta sunshine and the beautiful blue Mediterranean. What new adventure will I have today?
I will try and post a photo or two soon........ciao ciao
May 5th 2010, 6:32 am
#3000
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,606
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK.
I just want to give a quick update from Malta. I am sorry I have not been able to read all the posts, I have been soooooo busy and it wasn't always easy to get internet access. So, for all those who are struggling, torn between two worlds, in a new place homesick or scared, or in an old place feeling trapped and desperate..........take heart, we know that these times are short in the big scheme of our lives, and we know that after they have passed, we look back and either regret our decisions and think them mistakes, or we hopefully realize that they were all for a reason and we did the very best we could, given the facts and awareness we had at that time. That's what I choose to do. And it does all boil down to perspective. Every bad moment does pass, we just think it is lasting an eternity when we are stuck in it. I believe everything is for a reason, it's our need to control it that spoils it for us.
I said all the above because I need to remember it myself too!! My two weeks here in Malta now have been a whirlwind! The first week was exciting - my sister here with me so we certainly did a ton of sightseeing, and Malta is fascinating, so much to see and do, so much history. Also very European, everyone outside, streets teeming with people going about their lives, or drinking a leisurely cup of coffee/tea at an outdoor cafe, speaking all languages under the sun (Maltese is completely incomprehensible to me!!). Now the second week, with my sister back in the UK, is bringing back all those anxieties on leaving my home and starting anew. Is this what I want to do, is this where I really want to be, what if I can't find work, what if I can't find a flat (which I have only just done today and who knows if I will like living in it?), what if I am penniless, what if I am all alone and no one understands me - how can I survive??????? All the natural worries that come with the territory that we expats have chosen for ourselves.
BUT, a big but, I am realizing that life is an adventure that I can either enjoy or feel depressed about. It is what I choose to make it - and the next 6 months here will definitely show me how courageous I am (or how crazy I am), they will be filled with pain and with pleasure, and THAT IS OK. I will choose to laugh instead of cry and one day maybe I will still turn my life into the blockbuster movie I think it already is Remember everyone, we are all perfect in our imperfections, and we are not alone!!
Time will fly by, we can notice the good moments or the bad ones. So now I am going for breakfast and out into the Malta sunshine and the beautiful blue Mediterranean. What new adventure will I have today? I will try and post a photo or two soon........ciao ciao
I said all the above because I need to remember it myself too!!
My two weeks here in Malta now have been a whirlwind! The first week was exciting - my sister here with me so we certainly did a ton of sightseeing, and Malta is fascinating, so much to see and do, so much history. Also very European, everyone outside, streets teeming with people going about their lives, or drinking a leisurely cup of coffee/tea at an outdoor cafe, speaking all languages under the sun (Maltese is completely incomprehensible to me!!). Now the second week, with my sister back in the UK, is bringing back all those anxieties on leaving my home and starting anew. Is this what I want to do, is this where I really want to be, what if I can't find work, what if I can't find a flat (which I have only just done today and who knows if I will like living in it?), what if I am penniless, what if I am all alone and no one understands me - how can I survive??????? All the natural worries that come with the territory that we expats have chosen for ourselves. BUT, a big but, I am realizing that life is an adventure that I can either enjoy or feel depressed about. It is what I choose to make it - and the next 6 months here will definitely show me how courageous I am (or how crazy I am
), they will be filled with pain and with pleasure, and THAT IS OK. I will choose to laugh instead of cry and one day maybe I will still turn my life into the blockbuster movie I think it already is Remember everyone, we are all perfect in our imperfections, and we are not alone!! Time will fly by, we can notice the good moments or the bad ones. So now I am going for breakfast and out into the Malta sunshine and the beautiful blue Mediterranean. What new adventure will I have today?
I will try and post a photo or two soon........ciao ciao That's great insight.
It amazing how your outlook on life has changed over the past months, I can see you are somewhat content knowing its Malta or back to the UK and either seems OK with you right now, You just seem happier and I'm glad you are.
Enjoy your day, I know you will.