My experience of being back
Nov 25th 2006, 11:27 am
#16
A rather curious boy
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 5,917
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by whisky
Our minds are there for changing.
No doubt I will be changing mine about a few things in a couple of weeks.
Good luck with whatever you decide.
Whisky
No doubt I will be changing mine about a few things in a couple of weeks.
Good luck with whatever you decide.
Whisky
Nov 25th 2006, 11:36 am
#17
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by busterboy
And you know there is no disgrace if you do!
Nov 25th 2006, 11:42 am
#18
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,196
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by Betty Boot
Haven't posted on this site for ages........................... Good luck with whatever you decide
Overall, how's it been for your kids?
Nov 25th 2006, 11:55 am
#19
A rather curious boy
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 5,917
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by whisky
Right now i am changing it about every 20 minutes. LOL
So we go, should we stay, we'll go, no we'll stay....and on and on and on
Nov 25th 2006, 1:53 pm
#20
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 629
Re: My experience of being back
Thanks for Sharing BB. While we are really glad to be back, there is always the odd day when we wonder, though for us those are in the minority. It seems to be when the weather gets too much - though this year has been good so far for us. We could envisage a return to sunnier climes in years to come too, but we'd probably consider somewhere in Europe. It's the expat's dilemma - can't have the best of both. It must be easier for those that just don't like one country or the other. We like both, and that's the trouble! But we prefer ehere for now so it's not hard for us.
Good luck in your return. I think you will be more settled having more experience of both countries.
Good luck in your return. I think you will be more settled having more experience of both countries.
Nov 25th 2006, 3:29 pm
#21
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Re: My experience of being back
BB, that was good reading. Good luck in your return to Oz. You are lucky that you *know* that Australia is the place for you. There are so many people (like me!) who never find the answer as to where they need to be - always on the fence. It must be a great feeling making decisions with such conviction.
Nov 25th 2006, 4:38 pm
#22
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Posts: 156
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by HiddenPaw
BB, that was good reading. Good luck in your return to Oz. You are lucky that you *know* that Australia is the place for you. There are so many people (like me!) who never find the answer as to where they need to be - always on the fence. It must be a great feeling making decisions with such conviction.
Tracey
Nov 25th 2006, 7:50 pm
#23
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2004
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by HiddenPaw
BB, that was good reading. Good luck in your return to Oz. You are lucky that you *know* that Australia is the place for you. There are so many people (like me!) who never find the answer as to where they need to be - always on the fence. It must be a great feeling making decisions with such conviction.
Totally agree with that, always feel really happy for someone when they post they *know* this is now the right thing. Lucky beggars and good luck to them, it doesnt matter where it is its just the fact they dont have the dull overhanging doubt anymore.
I dont think for me it will ever be so simple, for a start we have 5 people to agree on getting the I *know* this is right thing.
Also I think for many once you have lived in 2 places nether will ever again have all you want, sheer impossibility, you gain some things in one coutnry and that will always compromise something else you wont have in the other country.
Nov 25th 2006, 8:00 pm
#24
Marie
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Thornlands, Brisbane
Posts: 83
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by Betty Boot
Haven't posted on this site for ages because things have been so hectic since returning. Now that things are settling down i just thought i would like to share my experiences with people, not to influence anyones decisions, just to share a point of view.
After 6 years of living in Oz we finally decided to move back to the UK with 2 aussie kids in tow! It seems like it was a case of being there one minute, the house sold in one day and we were packed up and back home within 2 months, didnt really have time to think about it or worry too much about the outcome. I have always been homesick at some point in time whereas my husband really doesn't care much for the UK so i have always felt the decision to return has been made more difficult.
Anyway, after getting back, moving into my parents for 2 months (which was a nightmare!!!), setting up bank accounts (even more of a nightmare!!), getting a rental (not too tricky but bloody expensive), getting my daughter into nursery (which she cries about going to but never did in Oz), chasing numerous agencies and my husband getting contract work (which pays surprisingly well) and basically trying to establish our lives again, I can safely say it has been one of the toughest times of our lives
I believe everything happens for a reason because as soon as we got back my FIL was diagnosed with cancer and is really very sick, there is no way we would have been able to cope with that being so far away so I believe it would have been the deciding factor for us to return. We are grateful we are here to help my FIL and family members, saying that it has also added a lot more stress to an already stressful situation.
We decided that to help us settle we should to buy a home of our own and for me to return to work as i have always stayed home with the kids, we have now changed our minds as we just cant see this move as permanent
After the initial excitement of being back has worn off and you stop running around like an idiot to get everything sorted we have sat back and said - is this what we really want? The answer for us is no. I never appreciated what I had in Oz and how simple my life really was, I thought it was too simple and boring but i would take it all back in a flash, i didnt realise how good my friends were there and i thought my family could be the centre of our lives - big mistake 
During this whole process my husband hasn't complained, he has gone to work (although he detests the travelling times to and from work and the traffic jams!), i know he hates this awful weather (because I can now admit to myself it really is grim) but he has settled in OK, surprisingly after all those years of complaining about Oz, is me who feels we should return at some point
So we are going to continue renting a home, my husband is going to carry on contracting and as soon as timing is right we will be going back!
We have wasted a lot of money, will have upset a lot of people and will probably have put ourselves well behind in the housing market (with the way Perth prices are going) but I have to say - no regrets, i came, i saw, i changed my mind (woman's prerogative!!) and will be going back. If we hadn't have done it i would have always lived my life with what ifs. So this post isn't to put people off because i believe i had to do it to answer a question, i just wanted to share my experience
Good luck with whatever you decide
After 6 years of living in Oz we finally decided to move back to the UK with 2 aussie kids in tow! It seems like it was a case of being there one minute, the house sold in one day and we were packed up and back home within 2 months, didnt really have time to think about it or worry too much about the outcome. I have always been homesick at some point in time whereas my husband really doesn't care much for the UK so i have always felt the decision to return has been made more difficult.
Anyway, after getting back, moving into my parents for 2 months (which was a nightmare!!!), setting up bank accounts (even more of a nightmare!!), getting a rental (not too tricky but bloody expensive), getting my daughter into nursery (which she cries about going to but never did in Oz), chasing numerous agencies and my husband getting contract work (which pays surprisingly well) and basically trying to establish our lives again, I can safely say it has been one of the toughest times of our lives
I believe everything happens for a reason because as soon as we got back my FIL was diagnosed with cancer and is really very sick, there is no way we would have been able to cope with that being so far away so I believe it would have been the deciding factor for us to return. We are grateful we are here to help my FIL and family members, saying that it has also added a lot more stress to an already stressful situation.
We decided that to help us settle we should to buy a home of our own and for me to return to work as i have always stayed home with the kids, we have now changed our minds as we just cant see this move as permanent
After the initial excitement of being back has worn off and you stop running around like an idiot to get everything sorted we have sat back and said - is this what we really want? The answer for us is no. I never appreciated what I had in Oz and how simple my life really was, I thought it was too simple and boring but i would take it all back in a flash, i didnt realise how good my friends were there and i thought my family could be the centre of our lives - big mistake During this whole process my husband hasn't complained, he has gone to work (although he detests the travelling times to and from work and the traffic jams!), i know he hates this awful weather (because I can now admit to myself it really is grim) but he has settled in OK, surprisingly after all those years of complaining about Oz, is me who feels we should return at some point
So we are going to continue renting a home, my husband is going to carry on contracting and as soon as timing is right we will be going back!
We have wasted a lot of money, will have upset a lot of people and will probably have put ourselves well behind in the housing market (with the way Perth prices are going) but I have to say - no regrets, i came, i saw, i changed my mind (woman's prerogative!!) and will be going back. If we hadn't have done it i would have always lived my life with what ifs. So this post isn't to put people off because i believe i had to do it to answer a question, i just wanted to share my experience
Good luck with whatever you decideMarie - Celtic Roses
Nov 25th 2006, 8:07 pm
#25
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by jad n rich
Also I think for many once you have lived in 2 places nether will ever again have all you want, sheer impossibility, you gain some things in one coutnry and that will always compromise something else you wont have in the other country.
) but must be hard for you with 5 voices to be heard. (Or maybe an odd number is better!)Don't you find yourself responding with a neg every time 'he' comes up with a positive and responding with a positive, every time he comes up with a neg? Not sure whether BE made me argue this way in home life, or home life made me argue this way on BE
.
Nov 25th 2006, 8:53 pm
#26
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Joined: Sep 2005
Location: Sunny Brisbane
Posts: 421
Re: My experience of being back
Just wanted to say I think you're very brave It's tough enough to emigrate in the first place :scared: when you don't know what you're in for, but to do it all over again & move back to the UK & then to find the
energy, determination & courage to face it all again, knowing how hard it's going to be, well thats Brave
I really wish you all the best for the future and I hope you find happiness soon.
It's tough enough to emigrate in the first place :scared: when you don't know what you're in for, but to do it all over again & move back to the UK & then to find theenergy, determination & courage to face it all again, knowing how hard it's going to be, well thats Brave
I really wish you all the best for the future and I hope you find happiness soon.
Nov 25th 2006, 10:24 pm
#27
Marie
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Thornlands, Brisbane
Posts: 83
Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by HiddenPaw
This is it - it's just a game of gains and losses....there's only two of us (well, only two who have an opinion ) but must be hard for you with 5 voices to be heard. (Or maybe an odd number is better!)
Don't you find yourself responding with a neg every time 'he' comes up with a positive and responding with a positive, every time he comes up with a neg? Not sure whether BE made me argue this way in home life, or home life made me argue this way on BE .
) but must be hard for you with 5 voices to be heard. (Or maybe an odd number is better!)Don't you find yourself responding with a neg every time 'he' comes up with a positive and responding with a positive, every time he comes up with a neg? Not sure whether BE made me argue this way in home life, or home life made me argue this way on BE
.Hi HiddenPaw - great name
You are so right, I think that I can't possible go and when I say this to OH and he starts to agree with me, I then come back with all the reasons that we should go so we are back on the circuit again. Feels right most days but other days I wish we had never started, Still not told family so it all feels like a big secret at moment.
WHat stage are you at and where are you planning on going?
Talk soon, Marie
Nov 26th 2006, 4:19 pm
#28
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by woogle
Just wanted to say I think you're very brave It's tough enough to emigrate in the first place :scared: when you don't know what you're in for, but to do it all over again & move back to the UK & then to find the
energy, determination & courage to face it all again, knowing how hard it's going to be, well thats Brave
I really wish you all the best for the future and I hope you find happiness soon.
It's tough enough to emigrate in the first place :scared: when you don't know what you're in for, but to do it all over again & move back to the UK & then to find theenergy, determination & courage to face it all again, knowing how hard it's going to be, well thats Brave
I really wish you all the best for the future and I hope you find happiness soon.
Someone asked how the kids have coped, to be honest it hasnt changed them one bit as they are still quite young to understand but i think returning to Oz will be tougher on them because they have gotten to know and love the whole family, I ask myself why I am doing it but deep down i know it is better for us all in the long run.
Nov 26th 2006, 8:59 pm
#29
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by Betty Boot
Thanks, i know i must be mad, esp. because i have to face telling everyone. When we went 1st time around we had no children and people thought we would be back after 1 year, 6 years later and 2 young children (the only grandchildren for my parents as i am an only child) and I dont think it will go down too well, when we arrived home it was like all my families christmases had come at once, they will be devastated to say the least.
Someone asked how the kids have coped, to be honest it hasnt changed them one bit as they are still quite young to understand but i think returning to Oz will be tougher on them because they have gotten to know and love the whole family, I ask myself why I am doing it but deep down i know it is better for us all in the long run.
Someone asked how the kids have coped, to be honest it hasnt changed them one bit as they are still quite young to understand but i think returning to Oz will be tougher on them because they have gotten to know and love the whole family, I ask myself why I am doing it but deep down i know it is better for us all in the long run.
My 2-year old has a fantastic relationship with her GPs and it does concern me what she would miss out on if I took her away from all that.
When are you going back, and how soon beforehand do you think you will break the news?
Nov 26th 2006, 9:12 pm
#30
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Joined: Oct 2003
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Re: My experience of being back
Originally Posted by Celtic Roses
Hi HiddenPaw - great name
You are so right, I think that I can't possible go and when I say this to OH and he starts to agree with me, I then come back with all the reasons that we should go so we are back on the circuit again. Feels right most days but other days I wish we had never started, Still not told family so it all feels like a big secret at moment.
WHat stage are you at and where are you planning on going?
Talk soon, Marie
You are so right, I think that I can't possible go and when I say this to OH and he starts to agree with me, I then come back with all the reasons that we should go so we are back on the circuit again. Feels right most days but other days I wish we had never started, Still not told family so it all feels like a big secret at moment.
WHat stage are you at and where are you planning on going?
Talk soon, Marie
We've been to Oz and come back. The reason for our return was due to expecting our first baby and wanting to have her in the UK. Following that experience, for personal reasons, I knew I would only ever have another baby in the UK, and never overseas, so we stayed put until we had #2. In the time between being back and having baby #2, I had to push back on endless pressure from my husband to return to Melbourne.
The arrival of #2 coincided with my husband starting a new job. Just as I felt that I was ready to go back, he found himself in a job that he wanted for life! So we were poles apart again! I'm not sure if I said "I'll go back" because it felt safe to say so (i.e. because I knew damm well that he wouldn't want to leave), or because I really did feel ready. The only conclusion I have really come to is that I can take it or leave it. But there is a nagging doubt about the future...... Coming on this site gives me a good reality check tho and reminds me of all the emotions I felt about living in Aus. I am happy here tho, that I will say.
How about you?