Would you forgive an affair?...............
Apr 9th 2010, 5:02 am
#76
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Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Calgary
Posts: 1,480
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
Forgiving is a beautiful act and comes easy to many people, making them feel better within themselves and appear gracious to the others. Forgetting, on the other hand, is something that very few can do voluntarily, especially as there is no noble status attached to it... Remembering can be ugly, and this seems to be the main killer in the majority of post-infidelity relationships...
As for 100% trusting your partner... I think that it is a sweet utopia - just like when my forefathers in the beginning of the 20th century thought they could build a country where everyone would be equal - it's simply against human nature. There is no way to predict all the circumstances and moods of the future, changes within yourself and your other half, just as it is impossible to know if at some point there will be all the components present for a perfect storm one day, and your house will or will not be in the middle of it. All I can do is hope and pray that my home is strong enough...
As for 100% trusting your partner... I think that it is a sweet utopia - just like when my forefathers in the beginning of the 20th century thought they could build a country where everyone would be equal - it's simply against human nature. There is no way to predict all the circumstances and moods of the future, changes within yourself and your other half, just as it is impossible to know if at some point there will be all the components present for a perfect storm one day, and your house will or will not be in the middle of it. All I can do is hope and pray that my home is strong enough...
Apr 9th 2010, 5:21 am
#77
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Calgary
Posts: 1,480
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
.......if my eye was going to stray, I would make sure I was free to do just that....
Apr 11th 2010, 2:36 am
#78
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Joined: Nov 2009
Location: Gastown - East Van
Posts: 413
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
Surely a lot would depend on whether the offender admitted to it first, or just got caught doing it. Either way, taking such liberties on a relationship is a really bad sign. There can't be many relationships where this happens, is forgiven and then there's no repercussions.
I would not forgive unless I genuinely felt in my heart that I'd done something to actually cause it.
I would not forgive unless I genuinely felt in my heart that I'd done something to actually cause it.
Apr 12th 2010, 10:56 pm
#79
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Joined: May 2009
Location: Langley, BC
Posts: 1,958
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
I think if you agree to be in a relationship with someone, and you cheat, then you've effectively violated the most intimate agreement between two human beings. That being said, if the person really means everything and are exceptional, then it wouldn't be that easy to just end it. Believing that you could find anyone that special again would be extremely difficult. So I think this is a very open and difficult question to answer since there are so many variables.
Apr 13th 2010, 5:17 am
#80
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,533
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
HI
Yes I agree with what you have said....but hand on heart, does anyone ever get over the betrayal....is the relationship ever going to be the same again?
It is all to do with Love and Trust......May Love, but find it very hard to Trust again.....as you say a hard one!
lol
Stef
Yes I agree with what you have said....but hand on heart, does anyone ever get over the betrayal....is the relationship ever going to be the same again?
It is all to do with Love and Trust......May Love, but find it very hard to Trust again.....as you say a hard one!
lol
Stef
I think if you agree to be in a relationship with someone, and you cheat, then you've effectively violated the most intimate agreement between two human beings. That being said, if the person really means everything and are exceptional, then it wouldn't be that easy to just end it. Believing that you could find anyone that special again would be extremely difficult. So I think this is a very open and difficult question to answer since there are so many variables.
Apr 13th 2010, 5:29 am
#81
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 26,319
Re: Would you forgive an affair?...............
HI
Yes I agree with what you have said....but hand on heart, does anyone ever get over the betrayal....is the relationship ever going to be the same again?
It is all to do with Love and Trust......May Love, but find it very hard to Trust again.....as you say a hard one!
lol
Stef
Yes I agree with what you have said....but hand on heart, does anyone ever get over the betrayal....is the relationship ever going to be the same again?
It is all to do with Love and Trust......May Love, but find it very hard to Trust again.....as you say a hard one!
lol
Stef
