scrubbedexpat091

Never got any response from anyone interested. There were many companies offering the service and I could not compete with them.

Nobody wanted their dog to be walked around town on leash.


Then we moved to another city.

Almost Canadian

I agree, I am one of them

scrubbedexpat091

As I had mentioned it in this thread, and I didnt want to start another.

I understand why services are the way they are but its terribly frustrating the services most suited to personality disorders are condensed in 2 of the most exspensive citys.

Vancouver and Victoria.

Which of course means a lot of people fall through cracks as they cant afford housing in either of those places.

I saw a post on FB today of someone locally who has another personality disorder who is in the same boat.

I think its time to end community based mental health its a failure and people should be sent to where the appropriate services are.

Shirtback

This is just an observation, & I hope you don't take it the wrong way, JS: many, if not most, of your posts end up as "what I can't do", rather than "what can/might I do?", however you disguise them to start with.

I get that mental health care programs are few & far between & hard to access in BC.

I understand that you struggle (& believe me, I know about that kind of struggle).

What, if anything, can your BE friends do to help? It's getting to the point for me (sorry again if this sounds harsh) that I just don't dare respond to your posts because any and every positive suggestion/comment gets shot down/converted to 'woe is me' by you .

scrubbedexpat091

I really have no idea what I can do which is part of the problem...

Realistically the first step in any success in life will be treatment and then other stuff can be dealt with after.

I dont have clear thinking, lack of confidence, roller coaster of moods and emotions few can deal with.

None of which is conducive to much success.

The key figuring out how to break the cycle and learn the coping skills necessary and working through long term issues.

Siouxie

I have a question, if I may ask JS?

When you were working for the airline, were you suffering the same black dog issues and did they stop you from working?

I'm just wondering if it's a case of 'what came first, the chicken or the egg'.. could it be if you could find a job that you enjoyed and felt was meaningful (and hopefully reasonably paid) you might find that your other issues take a bit more of a back seat?

Not wishing to offend.. 'cause you know we are on your side - we're just trying to offer up suggestions and wondering what we can do to be of help.



Edited to add, have you ever considered long distance truck driving? $25 an hour for this one for example, and they will train. Just a thought!

scrubbedexpat091

I had the issues at the airline however I enjoyed the job and the benefits allowed me to take frequent trips somewhere else. And shifts were flexible. If you needed time off you could trade off shifts to someone or pick up shifts for others.

Pay wasnt grand. Started at 6.94/hr and 5 years later last pay rate was 8.83 but I was young, lived with my dad (paid him rent) so was able to make ends meet at the pay.

I was part time as I wanted the flexibility but I averaged 40 to 60 hours a week as I had no life and picked up shifts for others all the time.

This was late 90s and early 2000s.

Outsourcing is the name of the game now. Not many have their own ground staff anymore in Vancouver.

Air Canada does but the pay is 11/hr and some change and the commute is 2 hours minimum one way a mix of highway and congested city streets so not enjoyable.

The pay just is too low to justify the commute and need for a 2nd car and associated costs.

I also loathe driving and find it hard to do in the congested roads we have here. Lack of freeways makes it hard in a small car, not sure I could stay calm driving a large vehicle on city streets..


If Vancouver airport was closer I would go back to a non-customer service job in a heart beat if offered.

We did try 3 or so years ago to move to Vancouver closer to the airport but rents are too high and we couldnt find anything in our price range.

Well we found one place but they had a lot of applicants so we didnt get it.

Siouxie

I wasn't suggesting you should go back to an airline/airport job - more trying to ascertain if you were able to function relatively well when you were doing a job that you liked, which would appear to be the case.

The job I linked to was long-haul, into the US etc., so not really so much travelling on congested city streets I suspect. Ah well, it was just a thought - a year or two at $25 an hour would have perhaps enabled you to save up enough for that mobile home.

I'll put my thinking cap back on.....



Edited to add - if you did want to get back into the aircraft business, Air North, Pacific Coastal, Harbour Air, Swissport Air, ASIG and Menzies all hire ground crew.
http://www.flyairnorth.com/More/Careers.aspx
https://pacificcoastal.prevueaps.com/jobs/
http://www.harbourair.com/about/careers/
http://www.swissport.com/careers/job...-apply/canada/
http://www.asig.com/job-search/?lang.../jobsearch.ftl
https://rn11.ultipro.com/MEN1002/Job...px?Page=Browse

scrubbedexpat091

Sorry I misunderstood you. Short answer when not in customer service at the airline it wad perfect nearly....lol

Common link to downhill at jobs is customers and people. I just dont know how to deal with people and its just not a good situation. Hence why I do okay short term in hotels on night audit but do poorly in day front desk with non stop people. The multi taking is also a stressor.

I do very well when there is 1 task at a time. Not so good when your having to do phones, in persons customer service, and various side jobs hotels have front desk do.


May very explain why the ramp at the airline was the only place I did last.

Specific tasks, no customers, some downtime in between flights to recover.

MillieF

if I could find anything like this I can assure you I'd be much more positive .... And

I'm in unemployable NB

Oink

You're in an area that devoid of your culture. I'm sure if you lived in a small village in England you'd find a lovely job.

Siouxie

JS have you considered working remotely via the internet? I don't mean a 'call centre' type job, but maybe one of those that have help lines or similar that are just typing stock answers or engaging with people on a forum type of thing? There's hundreds of companies that take on remote workers and at least you wouldn't have to interact with people face to face.

scrubbedexpat091

I have no doubt if I found the right job, I would probably feel better.

Its hard to go into a place you loathe and dont feel good about and feel good.

Suppose it doesnt help being in this area, not exactly a good place to be for a good job.


I often wonder if its just being in Canada and lack of options is part of the issue as well.

With that I mean things lile road trips for a weekend. Easy to do in much if not all the US where gas is lower cost and hotels more reasonable price wise.

Where this side of the border its not really feasible due the high cost. 2 nights hotel on a long weekend here can break the entire budget...

Ditto with flying. No low cost airfare.

But who knows.

Hope you find employment if your looking.

scrubbedexpat091

Not really. I have applied to at home call center type stuff like with a pizza chain. Only thing that kept me from doing it was my pc not passing their tests and the internet connection too slow apparently.


Ill have to look into what you mention as I didnt know there was that much out there like that.

scrubbedexpat091

If I were more stable and less of an emotional roller coaster, I am sure I could handle the jobs better.

Even when I dont quit, eventually employers catch on Ive got some issues.

I try to hide everything the best I can when at work and pretend everything is A okay. But eventually things start to slip and become noticeable.

Long term nobody can stick around and that is more or less why I dont have friends. But that is not unique to me. That is a very common occurence for borderline persons.

There really are no words that adequately describe what life is like, and well tv and movies dont show accurate representations of borderlines but that is what people end up associating with the disorder.

I can be calm and fine and seconds later is a complete meltdown. And as fast as it happens, I can feel fine again. Up and down up and down. Imagine a roller coaster and the car is emotions.

Of all mental health issues borderline is one of the most if not most stigmatized out there both by the general public as well as mental health professionals.

The public system of course by and large finds the cost of treating the disorder too high. There are exceptions of course and there are some very good programs just the access to them isnt universal and boils down to where you live.

That is how I ended up in ON. In Whitby as the mental health place there offers a BPD program. Wait can be long.

I just made some poor decisions like I do a lot as decision making can be poor at times, and foind myself in BC again vs being homeless in Janaury in small town ON.

Now I try and focus on and my wife helps on finding acheiveable ways to self pay at the DBT place in Vancouver.

Ive been in and out of the public system for years, and while it does work well for some, it doesnt for others.

My wife is bipolar. She responds well to medication so the public system works.


I am on an antidepressant that does nothing for me. Ive been on it so long coming off is complicated and not something one wants to do cold turkey.

Ive asked to wean off them but the GPs have been hesitant.

I dont even know why I am on the medication and I havent seen the doctor who started me on it in 5 years and only saw that doctor when I was in hospital. Never sae that doctor as an out patient.


Depending on country medication may not even be reccomended or only reccomended when patients are followed closely.

Even from BC experts:

"Experts caution, however, that treatment by medication alone, without any psychological treatment or therapy, is not advisable."


But yet borderlines are routinely placed on medications as the sole form of treatment.

This editorial by a Vancouber area psychologist sums up the issues faced in BC better then I can.

http://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/visions/borderline-personality-disorder-vol7/borderline-personality-disorder






Sorry for the rambling.