Happiness
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I think to answer your question, we each have an inner longing to connect to others in a meaningful way and to just appreciate life and to find our real (inner) path in life. I think that is really what all this happiness malarky is about.
May we all find that state of being
May we all find that state of being
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#92
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HAPPINESS = DRUGS AND LOTS OF THEM
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#93
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#94
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No, I don't think that is the child I describe above. I mention family conditioning as a negative, but children in the worst of situations can still be happy when they are on the edge of starving, or having lost a parent, or having little companionship. I do not believe the three things you mention are the basis for happiness.
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I've met them too. I can't subscribe to that way of thinking. If someone can get as far as realising they are damaged by their circumstances then surely they are capable of reaching out for help? Although you can't force them to take the help though, and I think there are some people in the world who actually don't want rescuing from that damaged state.
I wouldn't suggest its something that happens all the time - of course I don't spend my whole life wondering how to make people happy, but its like doing a good turn that backfires. Most people will recognise that from some point in their lives I'm sure, doing something or saying something, behaving in a certain way which you think is the right thing and ending up causing pain instead of pleasure to the other person.
Maybe its not an experience you've had?
Maybe its not an experience you've had?
Actually I do really feel quite content at present. The reason for starting the discussion was just cos I was mulling over something that happened that night and just got to wondering about other people's thoughts on the subject. Reckoned it would be interesting to hear what other people thought about that elusive state of "happiness".......
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As for recognizing family stuff, your original post would indicate you're still well and truly reading off that script. It's good to recognize it for what it is, but then there's the deviation from the script too. That's a different step.
No, I don't agree with that, I think it is quite possible to be reasonably content, and that is the way I feel. Not 100% content with my life, but certainly OK at the moment
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Honestly, that is why I started it - a train of thought as to why people - me included at times - strive for more out of life, and keep thinking there must be a better life there for them somewhere.
Those who do know my skills well enough to offer career guidance aren't suggesting a move at all because they are well aware that I have found my professional niche.
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No, I don't think that is the child I describe above. I mention family conditioning as a negative, but children in the worst of situations can still be happy when they are on the edge of starving, or having lost a parent, or having little companionship. I do not believe the three things you mention are the basis for happiness.
I think that you might have a romanticized view on happiness. In reality, young children who are starving, homeless and/or alone, are extremely unhappy. It is true that they might have fleeting moments of happiness but in general they are not happy. The happy newborn baby you describe lives in a warm environment, is well fed and is loved/looked after/has a sense of companionship.
When the young child becomes older, the final ingredient to being happy becomes apparent - a person not only needs food&shelter and friends/partners, they also need freedom.
These are the three things that we as humans need to be happy. Unfortunately most people cannot see this simple fact.
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I think that you might have a romanticized view on happiness. In reality, young children who are starving, homeless and/or alone, are extremely unhappy. It is true that they might have fleeting moments of happiness but in general they are not happy. The happy newborn baby you describe lives in a warm environment, is well fed and is loved/looked after/has a sense of companionship.
When the young child becomes older, the final ingredient to being happy becomes apparent - a person not only needs food&shelter and friends/partners, they also need freedom.
These are the three things that we as humans need to be happy. Unfortunately most people cannot see this simple fact.
When the young child becomes older, the final ingredient to being happy becomes apparent - a person not only needs food&shelter and friends/partners, they also need freedom.
These are the three things that we as humans need to be happy. Unfortunately most people cannot see this simple fact.
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Children play in the worst of circumstances. It's natural. This is what I'm referring to. As you say, they have moments of happiness.
I don't think anyone is happy all of the time. It's not possible, but I do believe that in the worst places children find their moments of happiness.
That's not romantic but scientifically accepted wisdom.
I'm talking with specific regard to Polly, who as much as I know about her, had a well cared for childhood with people who loved her. She wasn't chucked into a Romanian orphanage and left to rock herself alone in a cot. Therefore, I would have said that at a point, she was a naturally happy child and can access that feeling again.
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#98
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I'm talking with specific regard to Polly, who as much as I know about her, had a well cared for childhood with people who loved her. She wasn't chucked into a Romanian orphanage and left to rock herself alone in a cot. Therefore, I would have said that at a point, she was a naturally happy child and can access that feeling again.
Also, this was never meant to be a "let's psycho-analyse Polly" thread, as I'm actually really interested in other views, however diverse they are - such as those about children in orphanages and living in poor conditions, as well as people such as PP, with an "ordinary life" in Australia, and her own ideas of what makes her "happy". Thats really why I started it, more than searching for an insight to my own soul.
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#99
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To my Wingman, if he ever logs back in to read it - we both now know I owe you an apology in regard to that post, mon ami, and I think it needs to be a public one.
Wrong time, wrong place, wrong wording, whatever, a blip in life's rich tapestry. Sorry
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#100
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Happiness is the only sanction of life; where happiness fails, existence remains a mad and lamentable experiment.
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Trouble is it's easier to be aware of being unhappy than it is of being happy. Happy is kind of automatic and you take it for granted. Become unhappy and it fills your world to the extent it can be hard to find a way out.
Disclaimer: General you not specific
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#103
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For my granda happiness was hiding in his shed sitting on an old box lighting up his woodbines. As my gran hated smoking and used to give him a hard time lol.
I was speaking to an old lady recently who at 90 has the startings of demantia, and for her happiness is remembering her childhood and young life when she was able to do as she pleased. Now she is happy to hear of 'young people' having an adventure.
I asked my 7 year old what makes him happy and he simply said, having a mam and dad who love him despite him not being perfect.![Love](https://britishexpats.com/forum/images/smilies/wub.gif)
Mandy
I was speaking to an old lady recently who at 90 has the startings of demantia, and for her happiness is remembering her childhood and young life when she was able to do as she pleased. Now she is happy to hear of 'young people' having an adventure.
I asked my 7 year old what makes him happy and he simply said, having a mam and dad who love him despite him not being perfect.
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Mandy
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#104
Account Closed
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 10,784
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Hell, that's deep ![Blink](https://britishexpats.com/forum/images/smilies/blink.gif)
Trouble is it's easier to be aware of being unhappy than it is of being happy. Happy is kind of automatic and you take it for granted. Become unhappy and it fills your world to the extent it can be hard to find a way out.
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Trouble is it's easier to be aware of being unhappy than it is of being happy. Happy is kind of automatic and you take it for granted. Become unhappy and it fills your world to the extent it can be hard to find a way out.
Disclaimer: General you not specific
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