Go Back  British Expats > Living & Moving Abroad > USA
Reload this Page >

making friends

making friends

Old Jun 30th 2003, 12:46 am
  #1  
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Florida
Posts: 33
Smesa is an unknown quantity at this point
Default making friends

Is anyone having trouble adapting to life in Florida as a Brit. Not wanting to let go of your roots but resenting people only noting your differences & the fact that your 'British'. I've been living here ( Florida ) for 13 years now & still have one foot in the door & one foot out. It's no wonder I can't ' settle'. I now worry that I'll feel 'different' in the UK & find myself in that grey area where I belong neither here nor there. Simply at a point where I need to embrace America as my home or just go home. I'm leaning toward the latter. Does anyone else share my conflict? It is a lot easier for immigrants to adopt the US when they have come from war torn places, or countries that offer sub standards of living but when I listen to my Cuban mother in law share her stories of life with Castro, I have nothing to compare. I don't know why I left England, I know I was young, miserable & looking for a bit of adventure & to be fair this country has afforded me the pleasure of motherhood & it's not all bad but now I can't think of any more reasons not to be home, where my family is & just be "british".
Smesa is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 2:44 am
  #2  
BE Forum Addict
 
frrussre's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
frrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: making friends

Originally posted by Smesa
Is anyone having trouble adapting to life in Florida as a Brit. Not wanting to let go of your roots but resenting people only noting your differences & the fact that your 'British'. I've been living here ( Florida ) for 13 years now & still have one foot in the door & one foot out. It's no wonder I can't ' settle'. I now worry that I'll feel 'different' in the UK & find myself in that grey area where I belong neither here nor there. Simply at a point where I need to embrace America as my home or just go home. I'm leaning toward the latter. Does anyone else share my conflict? It is a lot easier for immigrants to adopt the US when they have come from war torn places, or countries that offer sub standards of living but when I listen to my Cuban mother in law share her stories of life with Castro, I have nothing to compare. I don't know why I left England, I know I was young, miserable & looking for a bit of adventure & to be fair this country has afforded me the pleasure of motherhood & it's not all bad but now I can't think of any more reasons not to be home, where my family is & just be "british".
If you can/able why don't you try to go to Blighty for 3 months. I have friends that sold their home in Florida & returned to UK after 20 years. They got to UK & loved it for a month, then reality set in. They now hate being in UK and are desperate to get back to FL. In twenty years, they had visited the UK many times, but never for more than 2-3 weeks. After a month, they decided they missed all the Florida stuff.
I have been here since mid 80's my wife & son are USC's. Some days I wake up & asked myself what am I doing here? Sometimes it lasts all day other times it only lasts for minutes. I think it happens to everyone who leaves his or her homeland.

My advice, think really hard before jumping ship. If you feel you have problems here in US, they will not just go away by going back to UK. Some problems, just travel with you.
You could take a look at the "Returning to UK page". Though would not advise it.

Reg. Frank R.
frrussre is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 2:45 am
  #3  
Ray
 
Ray's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 68,280
Ray has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: making friends

Seems to mean I get that feeling sometimes, usually when I am reminiscing about the past, but of course our minds only remember the good times in our past, I have been here a few years less than you, I do visit the UK every 2/3 years and really look forward to the visit, but once I am there, I want to come back here...When I am there all the shit that was not good come back to mind, My suggestion, sit back and relax where you are and dream of a decent Crusty bread roll, with Anchor butter and a huge English sausage inside..Oh God, I am hungry now...
Ray is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 2:50 am
  #4  
BE Forum Addict
 
frrussre's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
frrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond repute
Default

ray6, it's the only Brit stuff I buy these days is Irish Kerry Gold, Danish Lurpak. English County Butter.

I vote the worst thing in US is their butter, wo! is rubbish.

Reg. Frank R.
Just thinking of a Chip Butty,
frrussre is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 3:00 am
  #5  
Ray
 
Ray's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 68,280
Ray has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Originally posted by frrussre
ray6, it's the only Brit stuff I buy these days is Irish Kerry Gold, Danish Lurpak. English County Butter.

I vote the worst thing in US is their butter, wo! is rubbish.

Reg. Frank R.
Just thinking of a Chip Butty,
Frank..you really are depressing me, You sophicated people in NYC can buy that sort of thing, whereas we in the Klan land
go without...All I could find in the Ethnic section of the supermarket are Heinz baked bean at $5 a can, ridiculous.. I bought them all...
Ray is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 3:01 am
  #6  
Banned
 
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,933
Ranjini will become famous soon enough
Default Re: making friends

Originally posted by Smesa
Is anyone having trouble adapting to life in Florida as a Brit. Not wanting to let go of your roots but resenting people only noting your differences & the fact that your 'British'. I've been living here ( Florida ) for 13 years now & still have one foot in the door & one foot out. It's no wonder I can't ' settle'. I now worry that I'll feel 'different' in the UK & find myself in that grey area where I belong neither here nor there. Simply at a point where I need to embrace America as my home or just go home. I'm leaning toward the latter. Does anyone else share my conflict? It is a lot easier for immigrants to adopt the US when they have come from war torn places, or countries that offer sub standards of living but when I listen to my Cuban mother in law share her stories of life with Castro, I have nothing to compare. I don't know why I left England, I know I was young, miserable & looking for a bit of adventure & to be fair this country has afforded me the pleasure of motherhood & it's not all bad but now I can't think of any more reasons not to be home, where my family is & just be "british".
I have had lots of friends from England. I worked with many of them for 20+ years. One thing I have found is, that it's hard for an Englishman/woman to feel at home anywhere but in England. They don't care how much more difficult life is at home they always have this longing to return. While practical reasons may keep you in the US for many years, why not get a retirement plan together to go back home to England, maybe buy yourself a little house and live the evening of your life in the country of your birth? You don't have to be an exile forever, surely?

Last edited by Ranjini; Jun 30th 2003 at 3:03 am.
Ranjini is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 3:14 am
  #7  
BE Forum Addict
 
frrussre's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
frrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Originally posted by ray6
Frank..you really are depressing me, You sophicated people in NYC can buy that sort of thing, whereas we in the Klan land
go without...All I could find in the Ethnic section of the supermarket are Heinz baked bean at $5 a can, ridiculous.. I bought them all...
Ray, we can get English/Euro butter in local supermarkets. Not cheap, $5.99 per pack. Though a new upmarket Deli has just opened, all my butter at $3.99.

I guess one of the few things I would miss about NYC, is the abilty to buy any food, from around the world.

Plus we do have UK store Myers of Keswick, I hardly ever go there. The owner is Ex Lancs Butcher, makes is own pies/sausages etc. Irish Bacon & all kinds of UK imports.

Frank R.
frrussre is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 3:19 am
  #8  
BE Forum Addict
 
frrussre's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
frrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond repute
Default Patrick, where's Patrick.

Ranjini, is being derogatory towards the British again.
Reg. Frank R.
frrussre is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 9:26 am
  #9  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: UK
Posts: 35
aramintaalice is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: Patrick, where's Patrick.

Originally posted by frrussre
Ranjini, is being derogatory towards the British again.
Reg. Frank R.
No she wasn't, she just said that, in her experience, English people find it quite hard to feel at home anywhere but England. You could take that as a compliment - saying that the Homeland has just got something intangible but special that makes it really hard to leave!


Also, can't you ask Myers of Keswick to import the butter you miss? I feel the place must be really expensive though as it's hard to see how its cost effective to import food, especially cold storage items, so far on such a small scale.
aramintaalice is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 1:33 pm
  #10  
Banned
 
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,933
Ranjini will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Patrick, where's Patrick.

Originally posted by frrussre
Ranjini, is being derogatory towards the British again.
Reg. Frank R.
Et tu Brute?
Ranjini is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 1:50 pm
  #11  
Ray
 
Ray's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 68,280
Ray has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond reputeRay has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Originally posted by frrussre
Ray, we can get English/Euro butter in local supermarkets. Not cheap, $5.99 per pack. Though a new upmarket Deli has just opened, all my butter at $3.99.

I guess one of the few things I would miss about NYC, is the abilty to buy any food, from around the world.

Plus we do have UK store Myers of Keswick, I hardly ever go there. The owner is Ex Lancs Butcher, makes is own pies/sausages etc. Irish Bacon & all kinds of UK imports.

Frank R.
With apologies to "Smesa" for Hijacking her thread...but this must make you laugh, but eating is a serious thing for some men.
OK Frank here's the deal..I am sure I read somewhere you wanted a trip to Florida..load up your car with Goodies come on down for a week in the sunshine...you can drive it in 24hrs ...a young man like yourself.......
Ray is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 2:07 pm
  #12  
BE Forum Addict
 
frrussre's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
frrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond reputefrrussre has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Originally posted by ray6
With apologies to "Smesa" for Hijacking her thread...but this must make you laugh, but eating is a serious thing for some men.
OK Frank here's the deal..I am sure I read somewhere you wanted a trip to Florida..load up your car with Goodies come on down for a week in the sunshine...you can drive it in 24hrs ...a young man like yourself.......
Ray6, I go to Florida, at least once & usually twice a year. Only fly there, now. Jetblue is pretty cheap.

We have driven there several times, but like to take 2 or 3 days. Now tooooo lazy to make that long drive, though have had some great times getting there.

My wife’s cousin lives in Winter Park FL, I know there is a British Store & restaurant there. Fort Lauderdale & Tampa, have Brit stores I am sure.

We can get Kerry Gold & Lurpak at A&P Food Emporiums (Don't think they are in FL).
Reg. Frank R.

Still guess we need to get back to the Original thread.
frrussre is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 8:33 pm
  #13  
BE Forum Addict
 
Joined: Mar 2003
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,296
Taffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: making friends

Originally posted by Smesa
Is anyone having trouble adapting to life in Florida as a Brit. Not wanting to let go of your roots but resenting people only noting your differences & the fact that your 'British'. I've been living here ( Florida ) for 13 years now & still have one foot in the door & one foot out. It's no wonder I can't ' settle'. I now worry that I'll feel 'different' in the UK & find myself in that grey area where I belong neither here nor there. Simply at a point where I need to embrace America as my home or just go home. I'm leaning toward the latter. Does anyone else share my conflict? It is a lot easier for immigrants to adopt the US when they have come from war torn places, or countries that offer sub standards of living but when I listen to my Cuban mother in law share her stories of life with Castro, I have nothing to compare. I don't know why I left England, I know I was young, miserable & looking for a bit of adventure & to be fair this country has afforded me the pleasure of motherhood & it's not all bad but now I can't think of any more reasons not to be home, where my family is & just be "british".
I share your conflict Smesa- its a shame you live so far away (we're on the Gulf coast) otherwise you could come round for a cuppa. Been here 11 years and this issue doesn't get any easier- sometimes I think I'm in no man's land (fish out of water syndrome). At times the feeling isfleeting- like when you reach that inevitable level of mutual misunderstanding in conversation with someone- and that passes quickly. Other times, the feeling can last for days - like when you've just had friends over and its been sooooo lovely just to be yourself and have that old rapport etc you know what I mean- that's harder to shrug off. At times like that I find myself devising plans to move back home. Hubby and I are working towards retirement and hope to get a home in Wales (we've just sold our house in the South East, so one step nearer our goal :-) and plan to spend 6 months of the year in both countries when we retire... that seems like a good compromise to this conflict. Our children have settled here (although my newly married daughter is thinking of moving over to the UK) and we have a grandchild here, so we have roots here too. Anyway just having this plan makes me feel a whole lot better.

On a footnote- I heard Dudley Moore saying once that he when he got homesick (living in CA) he would put on the film "Chariots of Fire" and have a good cry- then get on with what he had to do...that works too.

Last edited by Taffyles; Jun 30th 2003 at 8:41 pm.
Taffyles is offline  
Old Jun 30th 2003, 8:49 pm
  #14  
BE Forum Addict
 
Joined: Mar 2003
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,296
Taffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond reputeTaffyles has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Originally posted by ray6
Frank..you really are depressing me, You sophicated people in NYC can buy that sort of thing, whereas we in the Klan land
go without...All I could find in the Ethnic section of the supermarket are Heinz baked bean at $5 a can, ridiculous.. I bought them all...

Ray6, Publix now sells Kerrygold butter, at least the stores here in Ellenton (just south of St Pete) do- take a trip down and stock up. Albertsons also have a range of British goods (in the ethnic foods aisle)- a range of heinz products, Robertsons jams and squashes, chocolate etc and other British products. Also now since Walmart bought out Asda in UK- there are some British products creeping in to some of the Super walmarts here- I found Ariel washing power last week ..oh joy LOL. Sad isn't it when we get excited over washing powder.
Also in Sarasota there are quite a few British shops which sell everything from clotted cream to Easter eggs..at a price, of course but at least you can treat yourself occaisonally.
Taffyles is offline  
Old Jul 1st 2003, 2:05 am
  #15  
Just Joined
 
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: New York
Posts: 1
kingsleyk is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Food

There is a Brit store in Dallas, Texas that sends orders all over the US. I don't know about the prices, but if you are dying for Heinz baked beans (the English version, not the American one..) or something, it might be worth exploring:
http://www.worldservice-uk.com/about.html

Cheers,

K.
kingsleyk is offline  

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.