Bevm

Anne, I'm so sorry for your pain.

I agree with the others, though. Don't rush into anything now. Give yourself time to grieve, get a job if you can to build up some money, tidy up your affairs, and yes, do get your USC.

In a few months it probably would be wise to come back for a visit, to get comfort from your family and to firm up your plans

Bev

Anne188

I was home for Christmas as a kind person donated a ticket for me I spent it with my mum (she is 80) my sister called me once and I had not spoken to her since the day my son died when I called her to ask if mum was strong enough to hear the news she lives an hour away but did not even come to see me over the holidays so I have written her off sad to say but there it is. When something like this happens you have to make some major adjustments sometimes... so I am not too scared of that.

I just took the first steps to apply for USC I am applying and asking them to waive the fees maybe they will its worth a try. Fingers crossed.

Elvira

Here is some information on fee waiver letters:

http://www.joneslibrary.org/esl/citi...e_waivers.html

Good luck!

Mummy in the foothills

So sad. Don't write anyone off just yet, she may be still doesn't know what to say about it all, and so avoided talking all together. Give it time.
You have been through such heart break. ((hugs)) to you.
How are the other kids reacting to you deciding to move home? Are they supportive?
Once you have your USC you can at least travel with no restrictions to see the grandkids if there are any.

Sally Redux

That's excellent advice.

alba1

Anne, I am so sorry for your loss. I know mere words are not enough to comfort you. No one can feel your loss but hopefully, we on the board can give you enough information that you can make an informed choice. First, pleasedon't make any large decisions until a year has passed and you are better able to deal with your grief. As a real estate agent I receive calls from widows to sell their homes and I always tell them to wait as long as possible before making a decision.
Also regarding your green card, I too had an old card (so old it was blue LOL) but a few years ago the lawchanged and all cards had to be renewed to 10 year cards. I know I was a few years late updating mine and as I remember I could have done citizenship instead of updating.

Anne188

Thanks for all the kind comments I so appreciate them. It is a very hard road and thinking about all these things help keep me distracted so at least for a few minutes my brain can be active other than missing my son. I have wanted to go home for all 32 years of my being in the USA just didn't have the nerve to actually go do it but the motivation has come because I realize this is it and at any time things can end for me for anyone and so we must live in the now etc., etc. I appreciate the waiver information very helpful. I did speak with an attorney friend of mine regarding the green card he said the government propose to change all green cards over to the 10 year ones but that it has not been mandated into law yet as it will cause such chaos they are waiting before they give you 90 days to get it done. I just returned from UK on my green card and they said nothing about it they never have so I think the "friendly" people at the gate would have told me it was not a good card to return on. I did some research again just now in case something had changed but all the information says it is a proposed action not a mandatory one as yet. I am having diner with the two remaining children tonight (it feels so horrible to say that) I am going to discuss with them all about my thoughts then. Funny thing is Adam was the only one whose birth I did not register straight away so he never had dual nationality and yet he was the only one that wished he lived in the UK to a certain extent he thought like a European and was very loving and kind just different from my two very American children that praise God I still have with me. Thanks again for your kindness to me.

reginac7

Hi--

I am continuing research on my move back to the U.K. and checked out a very good website in Wiltshire that gave excellent on taxes required and utility bills. But I really have no clear idea of the cost of living overall. I am interested in whether anyone has a recommendation about how much one would need for the first year in the U.K. if one is not working at a job? At 64, I am a writer with intervals of income customary with the self-employed. So I am trying to see if I can count on my savings for that first year with the hope, of course, that the writing is a true source as well. But initially I want to be sure I have enough with the savings. I would rent an apartment and so wonder what a monthly cost of living apart from rent might possibly be in the South West.

Many thanks,

Mallory

Were your 2 older children born before 1983? If they are interested in having dual nationality they would have to apply for British citizenship before they can get British passports - which is also quite expensive.

Good luck with it all.

Relocateme

Sincere sympathies to Anne 188...I believe only the very strongest could cope with this the severest of tests...I shall think of you over the coming weeks with great hope for your dreams to return to UK..

I also think that investing yourself and time in a job of work would relieve your mind of the pain as well as advancing toward a financial goal for your eventual re-establishment back home

I suppose the talk at the evening dinner may affect an outcome to some extent and that remains to be seen...for myself a complete removal from bitter and reduced circumstances has been a significant cure coupled with a renewed commitment to begin again...time will do the rest
Sincere thoughts and wishes go your way

trottytrue

Anne I am so sorry about the loss of your son. I also have two sons and a daughter and I always pray for health for all my children. May your memories help you through this difficult time.
I also had a green card that was old but a few years ago I had to go and get it renewed. I live in New England so perhaps the laws here are more up to date. In fact I just renewed it again as the 10 years was up. I think once you are in the system they follow up on you. Perhaps if I had never renewed they would not have bothered.

You say you are 51 well take heart I am 66 and I am going home and I do not consider myself a failure I just feel the need to go home. I have led a very full life here in the US. I think like others have said you need a plan and I think that should start with your citizenship. You say you have not worked in 2 years perhaps its time for you to look into going back to work and setting up a bank account for when you do return home. You will need money for expenses. Write a list of what you want to accomplish and set goals. It will help. I wish you all the luck in the world.

I went to have my fingerprints taken on the 31st December so now I am awaiting my interview. The girl told me that they do the interviews at the place I had my fingerprints taken. She gave me a booklet with a Audio CD and all the questions they will ask. I am studying a bit each day.

Anne188

Well I think the initial plan is going to be to go for a 6 month period which I will renew for a further 6 months if it goes well. I think everyone can live with a 6 month "trial" so to speak so I am going to set goals for that. I am a Real Estate Agent have been for years and so I am going back to work to see if I can make that happen to be honest I don't think I could go sit in an office in the state I am in emotionally at the moment because I cry a lot and I would need lots of bathroom time in an office. Well I am exhausted as part of this bloody grief is that you have no energy so I am off to bed I am expected to be in the office at 9 tomorrow...fingers crossed...

Easterndawn

Good for you!!!, I know it will be difficult in the beginning, but be assured it will get better. Will be thinking of you today, each day will get easier.

lilybilly101

I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine your pain but send you my sincerest wishes. Much love and luck in trying to get home where you might find some peace around those you love. Good luck on your voyage back. x

aes1

I have only just read your posts and, along with everyone else, I wish you all the best in this difficult time. As ED said, it is not the order of things, for our children to go first. I am guessing it must seem to you that the world as you know it has come to an end. But, inevitably, this too shall pass, and your grief, though always there, will in time leave room for you to begin to function a normal life again. I have been told many times that when we are in a deeply emotional state, any major decision should not be made for at least a year, no matter how strong we think we are. From my experience, this has been true. You really are in a very fragile state right now. Be careful if you are planning to leave the country for six months or longer on your green card. Even though it is not yet mandatory to have one with an expiration date, I was on a week's cruise leaving from the US in 2006 and they almost didn't let me back in from our brief stop in Mexico, just because I had one of the old cards. In fact, I was warned not to leave the country again on it and the inspector noted I had been warned on the card itself so I couldn't use the excuse that I didn't know anything about it. I have since (this last year, after 26 years in the US) got my citizenship. I didn't want to, and wish now I had done it sooner. The cost of it just keeps going up. So better be safe now than sorry later. I have 2 grown sons still living here and, even though they are not even married, I would hate to think I couldn't visit them in the future whenever, and for how long, I want just because of some old or new US law. As for the advice of others of waiting till you have some money behind you, well that is very sound. However, I know how you feel, you want to go home. I do too, and I have found that waiting and trying to save up more money in order to do that doesn't work in practice as well as in theory. Especially for us single, older women. It seems to put more stress on us than anything else. Money can come, and it can go. But the days we have on this earth definitely never return and only become fewer. Follow your heart - once it has mended.