Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

How i wish it was as easy as that. I said NO straight away and got called the biggest bastard on the planet

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

God i need to have a scream and shout, so i chose to do it on here, hope you all don't mind.
Most of you know i am trying to sell my house, but with everyone else trying to sell and no bugger buying, i am still here in the land of nod
Anyway this is not about my house not selling but about the in-laws that live here too. My MIL has cancer and has requested that my hubby pays for a relative from Scotland to come over and see her. Feeling in a position of guilt, my OH said yes he would pay $1000 to help get his cousin over to visit his mum. Problem is that the rest of the family in UK want to come over too and said it is unfair that this cousin is getting over here for free and not them.
What annoys me, is that why the hell do we have to pay in the first place. If his mum wants his cousin over, why doesn't she pay!!!
I don't mind paying a share (maybe $500) but to hell with paying all of it.
We are skint anyway, any money we have spare is for our flights back to the UK, container, deposit for rental etc....we can't sell the house so that makes money even tighter. His mum knows this, yet she thinks cause she has cancer we should pay.
I am fuming!!!
Am i wrong?? I just can't stand this carry on anymore.:curse::curse:

Originally Posted by rabsody

Oh you poor thing NuShooz, they sound bloody awful! :curse:

I know it's easy for us to say don't do it and don't let her get her way etc, but it's usually not that easy with the various politics and emotions involved is it? I know what my ex MIL was like!! Can you not say that money is tight at the mo, what with the move etc, but that you know how much it means to her so you will go halves with her, $500 each. That'll shut the old wotsit up! Plus that would be meeting your husband half way too. Worth a try ....

Good luck

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

Thanks for the advice. I did say that $500 is better for us, i think his mum needs to pay for something at least.
He was going to go up later tonight and have a word with her, but the last time i spoke to him he said he'll do what he wants!
Like i say, if we had the money it wouldn't be a problem. But for us $1000 is alot of money and took us along time to save it.

Originally Posted by rabsody

Gawd, sounds like OH now has a been in his bonnet

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

Definately had a big bee in his bonnet...he went and paid the full amount tonight behind my back. He said he did it to spite me more than anything.

What have things come to

Originally Posted by TraceyW

Oh heck R, dunno what to say mate 'cos he's out of order. Doesn't he realise that you're a very capable woman, who's also very capable of looking after herself and her kids?

I hope it all works out. I'm in of an evening if you need a chat

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

Thanks Tracey.

I think he regrets his movement now. I am past caring. He did say this is the last time he gives her money, but we'll see.

Got to concentrate on what is important and that is getting home.

Originally Posted by DunRoaminTheUK

My approach would be to tell him that he has spent $1,000 of HIS air-fare for getting back to the UK and if he wants to leave Australia at the same time as you and the children then he'd better start clawing the $1,000 back somehow?

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

lol, oh yes, he knows full well he has dipped into our small savings that we had, to give a free ticket to someone we will never see.
He knows he did wrong, but the way he has been brought up by his mum is something i can't handle. It's ashame to be so frightened of your own mother. So i have let this matter drop, he is feeling bad enough.

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

Thanks for the advice. I did say that $500 is better for us, i think his mum needs to pay for something at least.
He was going to go up later tonight and have a word with her, but the last time i spoke to him he said he'll do what he wants!
Like i say, if we had the money it wouldn't be a problem. But for us $1000 is alot of money and took us along time to save it.

Originally Posted by Machiavelli

I think you're right to let it go now, you can't change what has been done.

I'd have a chat with him though about maybe putting your savings where he can't access them in future. That way although he knows how much there is, he can honestly say to his mother that HE has no money.

I really feel for you

M

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz

The most thing that upsets me is that even though he stood in front of his mother and said..'i think it's unfair for me to have to pay when we have no money spare'...she still took it off him and never offered to pay anything towards it. To me that is just evil!
Even though she has cancer i never want to see or look at her again.

Originally Posted by DunRoaminTheUK

is your OH (and MIL) Australian?