a joke
Dec 18th 2012, 12:26 pm
#136
Banned
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: the GTA
Posts: 3,824
Re: a joke
I just received my tax return for 2011 back from the Revenue Canada. It puzzles me!!!
They are questioning how many dependents I claimed.
I guess it was because of my response to the line : "List all dependents"
I replied: 2 million Native Indians; 1 million crack heads;
7.3 million unemployed people; 100,000 people in prisons;
Half of Haiti ; and 105 persons in the Federal Senate and 308 Members of Parliament.
Evidently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.
I KEEP ASKING MYSELF, WHO THE HELL DID I MISS?
They are questioning how many dependents I claimed.
I guess it was because of my response to the line : "List all dependents"
I replied: 2 million Native Indians; 1 million crack heads;
7.3 million unemployed people; 100,000 people in prisons;
Half of Haiti ; and 105 persons in the Federal Senate and 308 Members of Parliament.
Evidently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.
I KEEP ASKING MYSELF, WHO THE HELL DID I MISS?
Dec 18th 2012, 3:46 pm
#137
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary
Posts: 1,898
Re: a joke
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
Dec 18th 2012, 3:51 pm
#138
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary
Posts: 1,898
Re: a joke
Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.
Dec 18th 2012, 9:33 pm
#141
Concierge
Joined: May 2006
Location: ex ex-pat, in Taunton
Posts: 27,404
I normally get a warning.
Dec 19th 2012, 12:25 am
#143
Lowering the tone
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Here and there
Posts: 7,433
Dec 19th 2012, 12:29 am
#144
Pictou County Superstar™
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: On top of the Green hill, NS
Posts: 4,219
Re: a joke
The Bogeyman lies awake in fear, each night, scared that Chuck Norris is hiding under his bed.
Dec 19th 2012, 1:36 am
#145
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 732
Re: a joke
Dec 19th 2012, 2:12 am
#146
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 26,319
Re: a joke
Santa say's to his Elf "I'm getting sick of this. It's the same old shit every year. Running about like a ***** in this stupid red costume, and at the end of it all, I always end up with nowt."
The Elf says
Some bloke walked up to the counter and said, "Burger and chips, please."
"Certainly, Sir," I replied. "Are you eating in or taking out?"
"***** off you *****," he snapped, before walking off with his food.
The Elf says
Spoiler:
Some bloke walked up to the counter and said, "Burger and chips, please."
"Certainly, Sir," I replied. "Are you eating in or taking out?"
"***** off you *****," he snapped, before walking off with his food.
Spoiler:
Last edited by DaveLovesDee; Dec 19th 2012 at 2:18 am.
Dec 19th 2012, 1:29 pm
#147
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2012
Location: Whitby, ON
Posts: 119
Re: a joke
Two unemployed Irishman saw a sign that said, "Help Wanted: Tree Fellers." One said to the other one, "We can't take that job. There's only two of us."
I have a Chinese girlfriend. The other night I asked her, "What about a 69?" to which she replied, "F*** off, I don't feel like cooking right now!"
I have a Chinese girlfriend. The other night I asked her, "What about a 69?" to which she replied, "F*** off, I don't feel like cooking right now!"
Dec 20th 2012, 2:49 am
#148
Moderαtor Emeritus
Joined: Sep 2003
Location: Upstate South Carolina
Posts: 30,771
Re: a joke
Dec 20th 2012, 3:13 am
#149
Stand-up Philosopher
Joined: Apr 2009
Location: Regina Saskatchewan
Posts: 16,344
Re: a joke
I asked my teenage son "Why are your eyes red?" He said "I've been smoking dope, dad." So I punched him right in the mouth - the lying little emo ****er's been crying again!
Dec 20th 2012, 3:14 am
#150
Pictou County Superstar™
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: On top of the Green hill, NS
Posts: 4,219
Re: a joke
How do you make a moderator suffer?
Spoiler:
