Former Lancastrian

Hate to say it but if she has a decent lawyer there have been numerous cases where you will be ordered to pay child support for that child even if not the biological father.

Almost Canadian

Custody and acces are very different things that most lay people fail to understand when making comments like you have done.

Custody does not mean which party the children are with. It means which party has the authority to make decisions affecting the childrens' lives (which school they attend, the language they speak, the religion they practise, etc.) It is very difficult to be able to persuade Canadian Courts that joint custody should not be imposed as they believe that both parents should have involvement with the children, even if they live at other ends of the country.

So, joint custody is what the Court will Order unless one of you is able to demonstrate that the other has made poor decisions in relation to the children in the past.

Access is whether the children live with you or her.

If the bio dad is already paying child support, she will not get any from you. The Federal Child Support Guidelines are followed by the Courts and, if she is receiving such child support from her previous ex, that is, most likely, the end of the matter, irrespective of whether you acted as locus parentis.

She would have to have very unusual circumstances to justify such an Order being made.

ultrarunner

AC...everything you said before this I get completely as I have been reading up on a lot of case law for close to a year now, and if I have to take the bar exam on family law tommorrow, I reckon I won't do too bad

I digress....I am not making a claim for the teenager that isn't a "child of the marriage".....I also happen to have proof that shows that way back when, she sort sole custody to the child from the bio dad, with all access terminated, with CS support ordered for the child.

All of a sudden now that she came to her senses and realised that I wasn't going to bendover and take when it came to our son, she is trying to make up that money by bringing a claim that I acted as a father to her daughter from a previous relationship.....I flat out didn't have a say in anything (school, sleepovers, discpline etc)

What she needs to do is stop spoiling the girl, and stop giving her money and encourage her to go get a part-time job like most kids.

She receives $410 / month for this kid already, and there is one case law that blows a claim out of the water...Cote v Cote 1995

ultrarunner

Based on what? You do realise there are criteria and tests that the person asking has to use to prove that the step parent did indeed take on that role?

Merely saying he / she acted as parent, is not good enought in court, especially when you are already collecting the money you are asking for elsewhere

dbd33

What's that, lunch money?

ultrarunner

Child support payment.....I am sure you can read up on how this is decided by the courts for 2 bio parents

Shard

Do you ever consider whether your ex's lawyer might be snooping this site and getting an oversight of your case/strategy...or is that being paranoid?!

Almost Canadian

I guess one could search the courts for the case of Ultrarunner v. Ultrarunner

Almost Canadian

If this is the child for whom she receives child support from the bio father, her prospects of obtaining child support from you for the same child are minimal.

ultrarunner

Yes it is the child (17 yr old teen with bio dad paying monthly) that she already receives CS for since 2001.

She is adamant that I need to be paying for that child (not my child) and that I need to maintain a 100% health coverage for the teen, even though ex has her own coverage from work

dollface

Tell her to get stuffed! and get real!

RubyRose

I agree.

ultrarunner

I intend to do just that, when we go for our case conference. Her lawyer hinted to my lawyer that her client is hoping to resolve this without going to trial.

Some past case laws have shown that this claim for a step parent to pay child support, is one that is a triable issue and no order for temporary support should be awarded.

You can clearly sees that she is motivated by money, considering she has a full-time job and is earning 38k / year, and will be receiving CS for the child of the marriage from me

helcat12

Sorry to hear that things have gone askew for you,. I hope things get sorted out for the good of your son and your sanity. Chin up!

ultrarunner

Update......

Wow.....it has been a while hasn't it? The past year has been a tough one for me based on a decision I made in July 2012, the decision was not received well, and things took a spiteful and emotional turn for the EX.

I realized that I wasn't exactly happy with the marriage (of 9yrs) because there was a fork in the road, and things weren't getting any better between me and the wife.

I felt like I was giving in more than I was getting out of it.....so I told her I wanted a divorce. We have a child of the marriage who is going on 6yrs, and she has a daughter now 17, who was 6yrs when I came along (this has put strain on her relationship too)

Anyway...this was not received well, and she was determined to make sure "I paid for this". I initiated mediation in town, and she decided to attend. We were there for 5 month and getting nowhere because she was being unreasonable especially when it came to custody of our son. She wanted me to have weekends only, and I said NO that am an involved dad and always have been, and won't settle for less than 50/50. She told me to take her to court, and I did just that by having her served.

She agreed to 50/50 in her response, to also having the house sold, and eventually divorce. All this stuff that I had asked for. Then she came with her own claims: wants me to pay child support for her 17yr old, who she is already getting paid for by her EX, she also wanted spousal support even though she has always worked and earns decent money

She moved out of the house 2 months ago, the house is on the market, and I have started paying child support based on the difference in our incomes i.e offset table amount for 1 child. My stance and that of my lawyer is that if she still insists on pursuing her spousal support and child support for her daughter who will be 18 early next year, she can do the leg walk and serve me the papers....I am not voluntarily going to pay her for those because she has no valid claims.

We now operate a 2-2-5-5 parenting schedule for our son that sees me having him on Monday and Tuesday, his mom on wed and Thurs...weekends starting on a Friday afternoon after school, gets alternated between us.

In the summer (8 weeks school closure), we do 2 weeks on, and 2 weeks off, to which I took our son to London to meet family and his cousins.

Because of the EX' inability to cooperate and sort this out like most rational couples....I have spent to date over 15k in saving on lawyer and legal fees. There have been times I have found myself having dark thoughts, but my running and reading has managed to keep me going.

Anyway...hope you are all well, and doing OK?

UR