Originally Posted by Oakvillian

[*]You've said that childcare and shift patterns may make it impractical for you to work if you return to the UK. If that happens, will you be left with a similar mental fog to what you have here? How much of the way you feel now is related to not being at work?

If I can't work there, I won't have gained much by moving back, in fact it will only make my husbands life harder as we needed my salary in the UK.
[*]If you stay here, but the administrivia of the nursing registration process is just too labyrinthine and slow to allow you to do that, what options do you have to find work in another field? Getting paid to be out of the house doing something constructive could work wonders. Volunteering could be another valid choice, as would starting a home business (do you bake? making cakes for your kids' classmates' birthday parties can be a good earner!)

I bake, and I've offered my services up to volunteer at the school. Will also be calling the hospital to volunteer there. Even being in the environment might satisfy.
[*]It's impossible to take the emotional response out of the equation, but so far as you are able to mull it over dispassionately, what do you really, actually, want to do. Homesickness can manifest as "put it all back the way it was" or as "get me away from this dreadfulness" - is your dominant feeling a push away from Canada or a pull back towards Wales? If the former, what is it specifically about Canada that's wrong - and can you fix it? If the latter, what is it about your corner of the UK that was so wonderful, and will you be able to recreate that wonderfulness now that you've had the Canadian adventure?[/LIST]
Good question, no push away from Canada. I think we will really miss the snow and all the activities you can do here. Much more outdoorsy lifestyle which suits us! The pull is towards "home" and friends. I think I miss the familiarity, the pattern of life, the certainty of always knowing what we were doing. That just needs time doesn't it?

I would suggest that the best medicine would be to come out to the Yard later this month and get pissed with the rest of us, but given your current condition that's probably even worse advice than everything else in this post!

Ha ha I wish. I'm sure a glass of wine would have made everything better by now.

Good luck whichever way you go, do let us know how things work out!

Originally Posted by Stinkypup

Just putting another slant on it to further complicate things, looking at your OH's perspective. I gather that he took a sabbatical out of his GP practice presumably with an easy slip back clause afterwards? I know that we have been away from GPland in the UK for 5 years, we have been keeping a close eye on what is happening and, as I am sure that you are both acutely aware it looks seriously bleak with big reductions in potential earnings and tick boxing all day, longer hours tied up with your more remote might make life far worse. I am sure that he is more than capable of jumping through the hoops - we did and are fairly idle in that respect. He could move province presumably once fully college registered if you feel that this may change things. I have to say that I am so glad that we left when we did, it is such a shame that general practice has become the pariah of specialties within the NHS- you know that the exodus from being a GP has snowballed, seemingly with good reason, underfunding, under resourcing and they have had enough.I get your frustration about your profession though, it is doable but bloody hard work and probably best not considered when "with child"!

Originally Posted by Shard

Not sure if you are more decided by now or not, but will add my two cents. If there are going to issues moving back (schooling, home, job) and things are relatively settled in Canada, that is a good reason not to rush the decision. More time in Canada may reduce the homesickness or may not, but at least after all the effort to relocate it would give you a more substantive adventure. If there were a great opportunity in Britain and/or it would be a dead-easy move, that would make it worth considering moving sooner rather than later. As I understand your situation, it might be worth giving it more time.

Originally Posted by Tirytory

I'm ready to take on the I told you so now...

My position is this, I would like to go home, I have been terribly homesick for all aspects of my life.

However, I have my job back but my hrs have now changed from my set day on my husbands day off to whenever suits the service and likely split hours.

My son can no longer get into his old school or any of the surrounding schools where he has friends. He will need to start a new school at that difficult time of year (Jan). This has many implications, for his sister and her place at school, we need to move areas, and may well have implications for my job. If I'm unable to get drop off/pick up from their new school area because of my new hours then I will be unable to work. I don't have family support and relied on my husband and school friends occasionally if I needed it.

So we're likely returning to a life vastly changed to the one I left, Probably financially worse off returning home, especially covering childcare costs/potentially unable to work, my son has to move from somewhere he is finally settling into, to a completely new class again and area also and so does my little girl. My new hrs are going to make life very difficult be it normal working hrs or school holidays. I won't be able to around for them as much as here. Ironically my husbands job is the only thing that remains unchanged in this "adventure". Right now staying despite the homesickness and not being able to work actually seems like the only good option, a case of you've made your bed now lie on it. Especially factoring in a property unsold as yet.

People said Go, it only needs to be a year, nothing will change, and yet everything has changed. I fear going back won't be as good as I think it will now. It will be filled with stress and trying to juggle everything. Top it all off with a third pregnancy and I feel very down with all the worry of it all.

My husband says we must go home now, it's done and decided and he won't go back on it. I think HELP....please

Originally Posted by Oink

Go back. This homesickness thing will only get worse until it gnaws away at you and destroys any enjoyment you have in life. You son may adjust but a what cost? Make the decision now, rip the plaster off and be home before you waste another Christmas away from family and friends.

Originally Posted by iaink

I disagree as shes really not been here long enough to be sure that its long term homesickness rather than mid term culture shock, tied in with the whole unable to work at the job she loved thing.

Originally Posted by Alan2005

If OP waits a few years she will likely hate it more and be really stuck. The time to leave is now imo.

Originally Posted by Sally Redux

I'm a bit confused about your husband. I thought he wanted to go back to the UK.

Originally Posted by Tirytory

Sooooo, after a few sleepless nights, the jury's back....

We are goings to stay, until at the earliest next summer- start of the new school yr for both- it gives me time to work through how I really feel, we will have a new Canadian citizen, we won't have to worry about short term money worries in the UK and potentially we would go back financially stronger.

The other option is to stay until it's time for the son to go to comprehensive- about two yrs away, or I'll work through my issues- love it here and stay for good. Time will tell....