Losing Your Independence
#16
Young at heart!!!!!!!!!!!
Joined: Dec 2004
Location: Turis , Valencia
Posts: 48
Re: Losing Your Independence
Mainly for the ladies. Do you feel that moving to spain and living 24-7 with your partner and perhaps downsizing to one car between you that you tend to lose your independence? I certainly do. Whereas in the UK on the days off I would just go off and do my own thing in my own car, now I feel guilty about leaving the other half at home on his own. Also there are a lot of women who give up driving when they move over and have to be ferried around. Do they regret this?
#17
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: UK/Costa Luz
Posts: 399
Re: Losing Your Independence
Give it a try - maybe have a "driving lesson" around Novo Sancti Petri, it's very quiet at this time of year - you might be pleasantly surprised.
#18
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Marbella
Posts: 223
Re: Losing Your Independence
I was very very nervous of driving here...but knew I would just hate not having my bit of independence.
Plus the thought of not being able to go to a shopping centre on my own made me feel sick! Nothing worse than going shopping with your other half and they dont want to be there or being on a timer!
A friend of mine was very nervous about driving so she didnt for about 4 years. Last year she got herself a car, took a few refresher lessons and now shes driving everywhere. She cannot believe she went so long without a car and how much it has improved her life.
If I can drive here - anyone can!
Plus the thought of not being able to go to a shopping centre on my own made me feel sick! Nothing worse than going shopping with your other half and they dont want to be there or being on a timer!
A friend of mine was very nervous about driving so she didnt for about 4 years. Last year she got herself a car, took a few refresher lessons and now shes driving everywhere. She cannot believe she went so long without a car and how much it has improved her life.
If I can drive here - anyone can!
#19
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Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Chiclana
Posts: 3,327
Re: Losing Your Independence
Hi Glynis
I rely on my OH for all my outings, We both took early retirement in 2005 and moved here permanently, I had a very busy social life (he on the other hand did not) and when we first arrived here I loved spending 24/7 with him (still do really) OH is the most amazing person and will stop whatever he is doing to indulge my every whim, I only have to say I want to go out and off we go; anywhere just for a ride out to see the sights.
I did drive back in Blighty, but here; well I don't think I could cope with the Chiclana driver! I also feel guilty about going out and leaving him on his own, the look of hurt on his face is heart wrenching when I mention that I might ventured forth on my own, he says "I'll take you, drop you off, you ring when your ready and I'll come fetch you". But just occasionally I would love to be spontaneous and just go out on my own, I am beginning to miss the independence I had of just hopping on a bus or train, meeting friends and family for coffee in town was so easy then. I love where I live but sometime I think being in a town would have been better because I know I would have been much more independent there then I am now.
Having said that what do you know about buses, I am a little nervous about trying them as my Spanish is still very sparse, I seem to remember someone telling me you buy the tickets somewhere before you board does anyone know if that is correct.
I rely on my OH for all my outings, We both took early retirement in 2005 and moved here permanently, I had a very busy social life (he on the other hand did not) and when we first arrived here I loved spending 24/7 with him (still do really) OH is the most amazing person and will stop whatever he is doing to indulge my every whim, I only have to say I want to go out and off we go; anywhere just for a ride out to see the sights.
I did drive back in Blighty, but here; well I don't think I could cope with the Chiclana driver! I also feel guilty about going out and leaving him on his own, the look of hurt on his face is heart wrenching when I mention that I might ventured forth on my own, he says "I'll take you, drop you off, you ring when your ready and I'll come fetch you". But just occasionally I would love to be spontaneous and just go out on my own, I am beginning to miss the independence I had of just hopping on a bus or train, meeting friends and family for coffee in town was so easy then. I love where I live but sometime I think being in a town would have been better because I know I would have been much more independent there then I am now.
Having said that what do you know about buses, I am a little nervous about trying them as my Spanish is still very sparse, I seem to remember someone telling me you buy the tickets somewhere before you board does anyone know if that is correct.
That is exactly what I mean. I don´t want to be dropped off and then picked up. I want to go out and come back when I am ready without feeling guilty that I have got the car. I have always done my own thing and that is just as well after thirty plus years of marriage or else I would have killed him and him me! As for riding a scooter I would be petrified. I love the idea in principle but would be sure to be knocked off on the first outing. P.S. I MISS WORK TOO.
#20
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Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Chiclana
Posts: 3,327
Re: Losing Your Independence
I am going to try next week to get the bus into Cadiz and have a mooch around the shops and have lunch too. Have become inspired to give it a go.
#22
Re: Losing Your Independence
Reading these posts made me question, for those of you who admit to being reliant on OHs for driving etc since moving to Spain, what are you going to do if/when OH maybe becomes unable to drive or, sorry to be morbid...but realistic....dies? How will you all cope than?
#23
Re: Losing Your Independence
We have lived here for over 5 years, and the first thing we did was buy a car and drive, both my husband and I are semi retired, but like most "girls" I love my independence, and get out and about on my own. You need a car where we live or would be housebound, always the lovely shopping centres to browse round, and although lovely going with hubby also nice to have a real good look on your own and take your time.
#24
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Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Chiclana
Posts: 3,327
Re: Losing Your Independence
We have lived here for over 5 years, and the first thing we did was buy a car and drive, both my husband and I are semi retired, but like most "girls" I love my independence, and get out and about on my own. You need a car where we live or would be housebound, always the lovely shopping centres to browse round, and although lovely going with hubby also nice to have a real good look on your own and take your time.
#25
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2005
Location: Ireland, for the moment
Posts: 107
Re: Losing Your Independence
Glynis,
here is a useful link re buses in and around Cadiz. You probably know about it already.
www.tgcomes.es
Glad to hear you are taking that first step to regaining your independence.
Find a nice cafe/restaurant where you can sit and watch the world go by, inbetween browsing around the shops and you will start to feel comfortable doing it on your own. I say this because in recent years my OH won't go out very often and certainly not to any shops so I had to take courage in both hands and go for it by myself
Jenna.
here is a useful link re buses in and around Cadiz. You probably know about it already.
www.tgcomes.es
Glad to hear you are taking that first step to regaining your independence.
Find a nice cafe/restaurant where you can sit and watch the world go by, inbetween browsing around the shops and you will start to feel comfortable doing it on your own. I say this because in recent years my OH won't go out very often and certainly not to any shops so I had to take courage in both hands and go for it by myself
Jenna.
#26
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Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Chiclana
Posts: 3,327
Re: Losing Your Independence
Glynis,
here is a useful link re buses in and around Cadiz. You probably know about it already.
www.tgcomes.es
Glad to hear you are taking that first step to regaining your independence.
Find a nice cafe/restaurant where you can sit and watch the world go by, inbetween browsing around the shops and you will start to feel comfortable doing it on your own. I say this because in recent years my OH won't go out very often and certainly not to any shops so I had to take courage in both hands and go for it by myself
Jenna.
here is a useful link re buses in and around Cadiz. You probably know about it already.
www.tgcomes.es
Glad to hear you are taking that first step to regaining your independence.
Find a nice cafe/restaurant where you can sit and watch the world go by, inbetween browsing around the shops and you will start to feel comfortable doing it on your own. I say this because in recent years my OH won't go out very often and certainly not to any shops so I had to take courage in both hands and go for it by myself
Jenna.
#27
Not Junior but not Senior
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 1,052
Re: Losing Your Independence
That is exactly what I mean. I don´t want to be dropped off and then picked up. I want to go out and come back when I am ready without feeling guilty that I have got the car. I have always done my own thing and that is just as well after thirty plus years of marriage or else I would have killed him and him me! As for riding a scooter I would be petrified. I love the idea in principle but would be sure to be knocked off on the first outing. P.S. I MISS WORK TOO.
#28
Re: Losing Your Independence
Just like mine. Makes you feel rushed doesn't it. I'm hoping to make some girlfriends when I am over there, someone to shop and dine with and have a giggle....be girlie again and forget (for a little while) that I am a housewife and mother
#29
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 5,359
Re: Losing Your Independence
This really does surprise me as I always think drivers on the Costa de la Luz are very patient - certainly you don't hear horns blaring like in other parts of Spain.
Give it a try - maybe have a "driving lesson" around Novo Sancti Petri, it's very quiet at this time of year - you might be pleasantly surprised.
Give it a try - maybe have a "driving lesson" around Novo Sancti Petri, it's very quiet at this time of year - you might be pleasantly surprised.
#30
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 5,359
Re: Losing Your Independence
Reading these posts made me question, for those of you who admit to being reliant on OHs for driving etc since moving to Spain, what are you going to do if/when OH maybe becomes unable to drive or, sorry to be morbid...but realistic....dies? How will you all cope than?