YRSBoy

Controversy continues to hound the recently appointed Ambassador for Bedford. It has come to the attention of the SSSR that the Ambassador may have used Public Funds to purchase her Father’s new hot tub and is currently under investigation by the Republic’s Ministry of Finance.

Our undercover reporter managed to snap the Ambassador’s Father as he luxuriated in his new tub on his rear deck. Several of his neighbours (who did not wish to be named) have claimed that they have been forced to retreat inside their homes after catching glimpses of his scrawny naked butt disappearing into the bubbles. One neighbour is quoted as saying ‘It’s not so much him I’m concerned about - it’s the Over 60’s Pool Party that I hear he is trying to arrange – he’s not exactly the Hugh Heffner of Nova Scotia now is he

YRSBoy

SCOTIA’S SUNDAY SCANDAL RAG

COMING SOON:

Great Britain threatens a trade embargo on the Republic of Nova Scotia

Our reporter goes undercover with the North Shore Separatists, he reports back on the movements of the North Shore Peoples Popular Front.

We will be reporting on Ex President Bill Clinton’s visit to the Republic.

Cookie

LiffyB

Poppy2

Madam – in your position as speaker of the House of Representatives I ask that you address the issue of public servants being blatantly victimized by the Scotia Sunday Scandal Rag.

Members of my family in recent weeks have found themselves at the blunt end of this disgraceful publication – is nobody safe from it’s totally unsubstantiated repots? I can categorically deny that public funds were used to buy my father a hot tub, in fact my father purchased his tub with money he had collected from recycling bottles & cans. Perhaps Amy-David can substantiate these claims as I believe that my Father recently followed her into the Recycling Depot out at Bayers Lake – perhaps she witnessed him collecting his dues?

I fail to see how my Fathers neighbours have seen bubbles in his tub – he didn’t have the funds for a deluxe jet model. The only time my Father has bubbles in his bath is when he has been eating Beans with Hog Fat!

Madam – I ask that you investigate this publication at your earliest convenience!:curse:

Poppy2

Everyone needs to calm down - there is complimentary Vicodin at the local Drugmart.

Now whilst I am mobilising the appropriate people to look into this matter, I have approached a couple of well known figures to assist us in this transition period. I know they will bring both enlightenment and discipline......not to mention show us how best to utilise a hot tub........

LiffyB

Thank you Madam speaker! I'd love to see it when YRSBoy gets a visit from Mr T shouting 'You crazy fool!' I must say I am concerned about this Trade Embargo - does it mean no more British Chocolate at Pete's? surely you for one must be concerned



OMG! I nearly chocked on my lemon meringue when I enlarged the picture of the 'Pope' - where the heck did you find that? Hugh Heffner as the Pope - nice going!

LiffyB

Poppy2

Well.......if they are serious about the trade embargo, then we will go to war! It all rather depends what they are talking about. If it's faggots, then I am not concerned, but if they want to keep me from my turkish delight, curly wurly or lucky stars ........:curse:

........................but that's just crazy talk. Shall I get the submarine brushed off just in case?

As for Hugh dressed as the Pope - well when you are as influential as I clearly am, and when NS is so well publisized by the infamous North Shorer's, its amazing what a new immigrant might do to get PR. Dont for one moment think its merely dress-up time for Hugh, he is dead serious, he wants to be NS's version of the Pope. I have suggested we might be more interested if he went more *Dalai Lama*.......but when Hugh gets an idea its hard to shift. Bless him!

Kimi-Deacon

The republic's all female submarine crew prepare to sail incase a trade embargo is announced on the Republic.

destinationnovascotia

Fantastic. I always fancied myself as a bit of a sailor. Put me down for first mate

Poppy2

Well Miss Kimi-Deacon - I sincerely hope that your proposed submarine isnt our answer to the issue, its not properly equipt for starters! Where the heck are the Rhinestones?

And I also include my suggestion for weapon to arm our all female forces.

I think the UK will rethink their impetuous decision when they see that lot bearing down on them - however, dont make the landing anywhere near Brighton. No-one would know that was an invasion force, they would assume that it was some Mardi Gras float!

And Destination...............we all knew you would want to be with Sailors, sadly these look to all be girls.............rethinking your stance, or game to be in command?? I can find you a suitable outfit!

Poppy2

Its ok..................have found a suitable outfit for you DNS, it combines both your current profession, but also your new vocation. I think it will be just the thing - inspiring, commanding and very versatile. Also doesnt need ironing.

What cha think?

destinationnovascotia

It will be just the thing for me after my boob job

Poppy2

Whatever are you talking about? We all know you have bodacious ta-ta's! We've all googled you and seen the pics online..............................

Damnit people................we have our first sex tape scandal!

Kimi-Deacon, can we trust you to do damage limitation with the media and rhinestone that sub before Wednesday, my proposed date of invasion?? Hold on, do all the Spa's in the UK open all day on a wednesday so we can raid their chocolate shelves??

destinationnovascotia

Crikey, I will have to be more careful about who is allowed to take my photo. No more cameras at meet ups folks.

I just can't live with the papparazzi, have they no respect for the privacy of members of their government???

Poppy2

Well you do rather attract attention what with your prevocative choice in attire...............what are these nurses like??