Offering your seat to a lady?
#32
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
Depending on the context, 'lady' in Canada can mean, like dingbat says 'ladies who lunch' - ie it can carry the perceived negative qualities of being 'ladylike' : deferring, decorative, mindless, feeble, bobble-headed doormats.
I wouldn't say it's necessarily bad manners but it is along the continuum of "don't you worry yer purdy little head, darlin'" type speak.
I wouldn't say it's necessarily bad manners but it is along the continuum of "don't you worry yer purdy little head, darlin'" type speak.
I was also wondering why there were so many ladies on the bus heading for downtown at that time in the morning... surely they can't all be secretaries?
#34
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,020
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
I always offer up my seat to the elderly, disabled, or injured, but not the pregnant. That's self-inflicted (well, kind of) and just selfish.
#35
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 806
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
i have no problem wihtthe terms ladies, lady, ladylike or gentleman. Lady to me has connetations of gentle nobility - not incapable of defending themselves, mind you, but someone with a sense of how things 'should' be. One of the best 'ladies' in that sense was a secretary i knew. Always a kind word, always well polite, but if you crossed her, woe betide you. You'd never even notice until after hte fact but you'd be in deep troulble.
it speaks of old world gentility.
it speaks of old world gentility.
#37
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
Oh you're not talking about those prairie oysters again are you....no sorry must be mistaken thats SHELLFISH....
#38
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 604
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
I had to stand up on the tram for around 30 minutes when I was 4 days overdue, everyone looked away pretending I didn't exist and yes I was in some pain, as I couldn't walk for long periods without my back hurting. I am not complaining but a little consideration sometimes I can go a long way. I have given up my seat in the past for various reasons.
What gets me is the shopping trolleys on buses, so big square things, that people insist on going bringing on even if it is busy.
What gets me is the shopping trolleys on buses, so big square things, that people insist on going bringing on even if it is busy.
#39
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
Not sure that anyone would call me feeble or bobble-headed - but I sure would love to be a "lady wot lunches". Negative or not, sounds like the life to which I would like to become accustomed - occasionally, anyway
#41
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
[QUOTE=hot wasabi peas;6460436]Depending on the context, 'lady' in Canada can mean, like dingbat says 'ladies who lunch' - ie it can carry the perceived negative qualities of being 'ladylike' : deferring, decorative, mindless, feeble, bobble-headed doormats.
Thats my occupation sorted but as i never travel on public transport i don't expect anyone to give up there seat for me,
which is the send button, damm chipped a nail now
Thats my occupation sorted but as i never travel on public transport i don't expect anyone to give up there seat for me,
which is the send button, damm chipped a nail now
#43
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
Query on bus manners here...
I have been taking the bus to work, and by the time it gets downtown it's pretty full.
In general, I'd say that Canadians (well, certainly Calgarians) are kind and generous people, but I have never seen anyone offer their seat on the bus to a lady, whether old, fat, pregnant, whatever.
So I've been sitting in my seat on the bus, feeling very uncomfortable that nearby a woman may be standing, and unsure of whether I ought to behave the way I was brought up to, or if the woman would (a) be shocked that I even offered, and (b) take offence that apparently I thought she was old or fat or otherwise in greater need of a seat than me.
So, can I continue to enjoy my seat without feeling guilty?? (It's only a 20 minute journey)
I have been taking the bus to work, and by the time it gets downtown it's pretty full.
In general, I'd say that Canadians (well, certainly Calgarians) are kind and generous people, but I have never seen anyone offer their seat on the bus to a lady, whether old, fat, pregnant, whatever.
So I've been sitting in my seat on the bus, feeling very uncomfortable that nearby a woman may be standing, and unsure of whether I ought to behave the way I was brought up to, or if the woman would (a) be shocked that I even offered, and (b) take offence that apparently I thought she was old or fat or otherwise in greater need of a seat than me.
So, can I continue to enjoy my seat without feeling guilty?? (It's only a 20 minute journey)
I always give up my seat if I see an old person or pregnant lady standing and I am a 27 year old female.
Its about doing some to help someone. Nothing wrong with that.
#44
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,124
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
The fact that one rarely sees a kid, or even an adult, giving up their seat for an obviously very pregnant person, or for an older type, or someone cursed with a walking stick, simply illustrates the lack of civility in a very selfish, I-don't-give-a-sh*t society.
Parents are excellent at procreating (very little brain power or effort involved) but not at educating their young in good manners.
In Montreal there are signs on buses and the metro requesting that seats be vacated for the pregnant or infirm. What is puzzling is that a polite request and not a firm demand is made.
Some Moms are also selfish. A two year old can easily be placed on ones lap and doesn't need a seat. Plus, the infant doesn't even pay a fare.
Parents are excellent at procreating (very little brain power or effort involved) but not at educating their young in good manners.
In Montreal there are signs on buses and the metro requesting that seats be vacated for the pregnant or infirm. What is puzzling is that a polite request and not a firm demand is made.
Some Moms are also selfish. A two year old can easily be placed on ones lap and doesn't need a seat. Plus, the infant doesn't even pay a fare.
Last edited by montreal mike; Jun 13th 2008 at 5:16 pm.
#45
Re: Offering your seat to a lady?
The fact that one rarely sees a kid, or even an adult, giving up their seat for an obviously very pregnant person, or for an older type, or someone cursed with a walking stick, simply illustrates the lack of civility in a very selfish, I-don't-give-a-sh*t society.
Parents are excellent at procreating (very little brain power or effort involved) but not at educating their young in good manners.
In Montreal there are signs on buses and the metro requesting that seats be vacated for the pregnant or infirm. What is puzzling is that a polite request and not a firm demand is made.
Some Moms are also selfish. A two year old can easily be placed on ones lap and doesn't need a seat. Plus, the infant doesn't even pay a fare.
Parents are excellent at procreating (very little brain power or effort involved) but not at educating their young in good manners.
In Montreal there are signs on buses and the metro requesting that seats be vacated for the pregnant or infirm. What is puzzling is that a polite request and not a firm demand is made.
Some Moms are also selfish. A two year old can easily be placed on ones lap and doesn't need a seat. Plus, the infant doesn't even pay a fare.
Whilst on our recent holiday in Scotland, my 2 and 4 year olds held open the outer door to the corridor for the washrooms for a man who looked 70+ who followed us out. This was clearly a deliberate effort by my children, and this man was in excess of 5' 10" tall and not once did he look at them, acknowledge them or even say Thank you .... can I point out bad manners isn't reserved purely for the young (however young). I was thoroughly disgusted with this mans practice and explained to my children in a very loud voice so he could hear....that he was a very rude man not to have said thank you and what they did was very kind.