Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

My heart goes out to the parents because of the sheer terror they must now feel and my heart goes out to the little girl because of the sheer terror she must feel. The horror of the situation like so many other things in the world is frankly beyond words.

This particular situation was avoidable because the children were left alone and there wasn't anyone there to offer immediate protection. For a good number of years our children are completely vunerable if we aren't there with them and that should be the guide on what decisions we make in considering their care.

I don't know how any parent can think that checking on small children every half an hour is a good way of looking after them and assume that there won't be any requirement to tend to their needs in the meantime. Minimally one of them could have woken up from a nightmare without anyone being there to comfort them. Still, this Mum and Dad won't ever need to be told this because whatever the out come their lives can never be the same again.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

When my twin sons were about 2 years old we had a very traumatic episode.
They were both safely strapped (I thought!) in the back of the car and we set off to collect my 4 year old daughter from school.
I parked about 10 yards from the school gate and left the car to collect her.
I was away for 4 or 5 minutes maximum.
When my daughter and I returned to the car one of the boys was sitting in the passenger seat eating.
I discovered he had undone his car seat belt, climbed over into the front and opened my handbag.
He had found some travel sickness tablets and was tucking into them!

He was kept in hospital overnight as we didn't know exactly how many he had eaten and he could have hallucinated.
Fortunately he had no side effects and continued to cause chaos in our lives!
He subsequently demonstrated to us how he had undone his seatbelt! New harnesses were promptly fitted!

This episode brought it home to me how accidents can happen so very quickly!
I felt so very guilty.
You can't turn your back for a second!

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I feel really angry with the parents and worried to death about that poor little girl.

The parents are both 38 year old doctors. Can I ask that if it were an 'ordinary' couple or from a poor background would nobody in the media raise the fact that they DID in fact leave 3 children under the age of 3 in a room which was located at the other side of the complex. Mum and dad took it in turns to check on them every 30 minutes and discovered Maddy was missing at 10pm. Are the parents MAD :curse:. Abandoning toddlers so you can go for a meal for a few hours is very very poor parenting. There was even a nanny service available at the complex but they did not use it. Where was there natural instincts and common sense?

This whole situation is a parents worst nightmare. I really really hope that they get their girl back and no harm has come to her.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I pray to god that this little girl is found and taken back to her parents I cant even image the fear she and her parents are going through.we never once went on holiday and left our kids for a second alone, as we would take our babysitter on holiday with us if we were taking a holiday in the UK and the babysitter would bring a freind so she could have a good night out when we stayed in.if we went overseas we all spent day and night together.I know thats not everyones way of doing things but it worked for us and we knew our kids were safe and would do it all over again if we had to. it may cost more doing it that way but aleast we had peace of mind
kate

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I think that's the thing that confuses me most about this whole dreadful story. Mark Warner holidays are famous for their attention to the needs of families. They're a bit out of our price range and we prefer to do our own thing on holiday anyway, but several friends have been time and again (especially on the skiing holidays) expressly because of the availability of childcare facilities both during the day and in the evening.

Sure, you go on a family holiday to be with the family, but it's important too for parents to have "adult time" - a resort with qualified nannies and childminders on the staff suits that purpose very well. I find it difficult to understand why two doctors, presumably not short of a bob or two if they're paying Mark Warner prices in the first place, would not use a babysitter so that they could enjoy their dinner uninterrupted.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I find this bizarre. I think there is an in resort creche with an apparent take up of 50% (reported in papers). Presumably that meant 50% of the parents choose not to use it and did the same? A friend pointed out that the creche service meant disrupting children's routine. Some parents nowadays are focussed on a real gina ford style parenting when if they go to bed 1 hour later its awful, and the creche provided would probably meant this- so routine led parents were less likely to use it. But I still don't understand the choices made! i think maybe the whole culture on these holidays is one that gives and apparent air of safety and presumably 50% of parents there think it is safe to do the same. Apparently most of these resorts have a listening service that roves around and listens to hear any children crying and then chalks up the room number on a board in the dining room for cryers. I'm not sure how that is safe...

Gryphea

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

Maybe the other 50% kept their children with them...

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I'm thinking that the other 50% of parents simply stayed in or took their kids out with them - the normal thing that people do.

Am not sure about using the roving listening service abroad either. We have all heard about sneak thieves raiding holidaymakers rooms. Thieves breaking into rooms with only children in them doesn't bare thinking about :ohmy:

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

Mark Warner appear to offer 3 different babysitting options:

1. You get your childfren ready for bed, take them to the creche and they are put to bed - you collect them later.

2. A roving service where they listen at the door every 10 minutes.

3. A babysitter who stays in your apartment all the time - £10 an hour.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

This brings back memories of something that happened to me about 30 years ago -- yes - that long.

It was New Year's Eve and we had been invited into the next door neighbour's. We could not find a babysitter. So we told our sons, aged 5 and 3 that we were going into Pat's and that we would be coming in to check on them all the time. They went to bed and were fast asleep before we even left. Either my husband or I went back every 20 minutes or half an hour and they were both tucked in bed fast asleep.

Well, about midnight - the doorbell rang. The neighbour up the street drank too much so someone said "It's Alfie and he's probably drunk - don't let him in". The doorbell rang again. My neighbour's husband went to the door and there was my 3 year old standing there in the 30 below weather in his blanket sleeper!! He said his brother was not in bed.

Of course we freaked out and went back into our house and there was his brother fast asleep in bed.

I can tell you - we did not try that again!!!

It still sends shivers down my spine 30 years later when I think what could have happened if we hadn't answered the doorbell.

And we would have had nobody else to blame but ourselves.

We thought it was fine - it was only out one door and in the neighbour's back door right opposite. We checked on them. But you can never tell with children. Did that little girl open the shutters herself looking for her parents? Did she open the door herself and go out by herself? Was she taken on the street? Did she get trapped somewhere? We don't know this and maybe never will.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

makes you wonder

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

God, part of the reason I left the UK was to escape the tabloid-enthralled morons who'd get all over-excited by "sicko's". Canadian journalism may not be that great, but at least they don't have publications of the calibre of the Sun and Mail over here - or if they do they don't enjoy anything like the same level of scary popularity.

As for the poster who recommended reinstating the death penalty to stem the wave of terrorists and murderers; it doesn't really seemed to have helped the US much.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

Ive been reading everyday the bbc website hoping they find her, the poor soul, why anyone in this day and age would leave there kids even for a split second is beyond me, But they shouldnt be punished any further for it, they probably feel terrible enough!!

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

I'm sure they do, but if they're guilty of neglect then they should be punished according to the law. It would set a pretty crazy precedent not to.

Re: Abduction in the Algarve
 

tomorrow will be even harder for the parents as its maddy's birthday,it's my daughters birthday tomorrow and she will be eight and she is upset with me because her friends of the same age are allowed to play in the street and i will not let her go and play with them,things like this just makes me more scared to take the chance.
also places like portugal are very taken with blonde haired children,when we went my son was two and everyone kept touching his head which made me very nervous.