Serious about going back
#196
Forum Regular

Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 33


Granted, however if you read through the replies I am not sure it does give a true or complete picture of what to expect. Most replies where in retaliation to the OP's obvious dig at Canadian life after only 5mths.
Whatever reason the original post was put on for, it resulted in 'attacks' from many who replied it. I doubt that the next person who has only been here a short time, and is feeling depressed, isolated, or disillusioned would make the same mistake of posting.
I felt all of the above when I first arrived to Canada as many people do - yes its not easy settling into a new environment, and people deal with this differently. Some go back, but most move forward and enjoy what is on offer.
#197
If you post in a public forum you have to be prepared to take the rough with the smooth, and some of the less sugar coated comments come from people who have useful experience of the process. Generally people post here to share the benefit of their experience and to try and help others as they have been helped in the past by passing on their experience, both good and bad.
If anyone is abusive feel free to hit the [!] report button. I have not bothered to go through several pages of posts.
Last edited by iaink; Dec 14th 2010 at 7:01 am.
#199
Just Joined
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 8

Only been here for 5 months, and now even OH is fed up.
Have tried to stick it out and realise lifestyle is better but...
12 yr old is getting depressed,at least 3 pieces of homework every night,
children don't do anything apart from extra curricular activities they never hang out,
trying to mix with locals and just get empty gestures of we will have to...,
was promised lots of support and help from OH company- it never happened I ended up doing most of it,
still waiting for my certificates to be assessed so I can get a job,
OH hasnt been warm for 2 months - he hates the cold.
BUT
do we go back to the doom and gloom of UK
rising taxes
general lethargy
ARRRGGHH!!!!!!!!!
Rock and a hard place.
Some general advise would be appreciated.We have had this down before, but it doesn't seem to get any easier.Is it worth it????
Have tried to stick it out and realise lifestyle is better but...
12 yr old is getting depressed,at least 3 pieces of homework every night,
children don't do anything apart from extra curricular activities they never hang out,
trying to mix with locals and just get empty gestures of we will have to...,
was promised lots of support and help from OH company- it never happened I ended up doing most of it,
still waiting for my certificates to be assessed so I can get a job,
OH hasnt been warm for 2 months - he hates the cold.
BUT
do we go back to the doom and gloom of UK
rising taxes
general lethargy
ARRRGGHH!!!!!!!!!
Rock and a hard place.
Some general advise would be appreciated.We have had this down before, but it doesn't seem to get any easier.Is it worth it????

I just wish that some of the people for who it has worked out, would take a moment to understand that one size does not fit all, some will try and love it, others will say that this is not for us. I find that some posters see a decision to return to where you came from as an attack on Canada, it is not. I notice some saying that you are using your kids as scapegoats, well hey, isn't the happiness of the kids exactly the reason that you originally made the decision to try and better your life. I for one can state hand on heart that even if myself and my wife didn't like it here at all, if the kids settled quickly and 'enjoyed' life here, we would give it as long as it took for us to come round.
Do what you feel is right, and be happy. I would NEVER discourage anyone from emigrating, and I would certainly say to any one who tries it, and then goes back, at least you tried. The only things in life that you will regret, are the things that you could have done, but didn't. Happiness must follow you where ever you go, if it doesn't, it may well be time to take a step back to the last place you left it.
Best of Luck.
#201
don't fail to research




Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 291
From: London, Ontario











I think everyone should do what is best for them, when you post on this site you are looking for the honest views of people who have went through it and have no links to you so they are biased.
I would honestly say 6 months is not long enough but that is me - we have been here 4 years tomorrow and for the first time last week I had doubts. Reason, my parents were over and implied it might be the last time they come. I had said I would never go back not even for a holiday but now I am rethinking it. I think I will stick with my original decision but it has made me think.
My children were younger when they came 14 months and 6 years. Beverley now aged 10 feels she went backwards when she started school but now she is on an even par and enjoying life here. Damien knows no different. they are both thriving at school/nursery and in life. We have yet joined all the clubs we would like due to only one of us working but we will get there.
Do what you feel si right for you but be sure, be very sure, as you worked so hard to get here - have you REALLY given it your best - have you really made a true effort. Nothing worse to go back to what the UK has become and realise you made a mistake.
I would honestly say 6 months is not long enough but that is me - we have been here 4 years tomorrow and for the first time last week I had doubts. Reason, my parents were over and implied it might be the last time they come. I had said I would never go back not even for a holiday but now I am rethinking it. I think I will stick with my original decision but it has made me think.
My children were younger when they came 14 months and 6 years. Beverley now aged 10 feels she went backwards when she started school but now she is on an even par and enjoying life here. Damien knows no different. they are both thriving at school/nursery and in life. We have yet joined all the clubs we would like due to only one of us working but we will get there.
Do what you feel si right for you but be sure, be very sure, as you worked so hard to get here - have you REALLY given it your best - have you really made a true effort. Nothing worse to go back to what the UK has become and realise you made a mistake.
#202
Forum Regular




Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 250
From: kingsville, ontario











I share your sentiments exactly, as we too are in the same boat. 6 months and looking to go back. The kids have lost their identity, and no longer 'enjoy' being kids. They miss friends, and the happy go lucky children we raised (15, and 12 yrs old), now just seem to go through each day with no spark, bacause the kids are not happy, the OH is also finding it difficult to settle, which has a knock on effect on the whole family.
I just wish that some of the people for who it has worked out, would take a moment to understand that one size does not fit all, some will try and love it, others will say that this is not for us. I find that some posters see a decision to return to where you came from as an attack on Canada, it is not. I notice some saying that you are using your kids as scapegoats, well hey, isn't the happiness of the kids exactly the reason that you originally made the decision to try and better your life. I for one can state hand on heart that even if myself and my wife didn't like it here at all, if the kids settled quickly and 'enjoyed' life here, we would give it as long as it took for us to come round.
Do what you feel is right, and be happy. I would NEVER discourage anyone from emigrating, and I would certainly say to any one who tries it, and then goes back, at least you tried. The only things in life that you will regret, are the things that you could have done, but didn't. Happiness must follow you where ever you go, if it doesn't, it may well be time to take a step back to the last place you left it.
Best of Luck.
I just wish that some of the people for who it has worked out, would take a moment to understand that one size does not fit all, some will try and love it, others will say that this is not for us. I find that some posters see a decision to return to where you came from as an attack on Canada, it is not. I notice some saying that you are using your kids as scapegoats, well hey, isn't the happiness of the kids exactly the reason that you originally made the decision to try and better your life. I for one can state hand on heart that even if myself and my wife didn't like it here at all, if the kids settled quickly and 'enjoyed' life here, we would give it as long as it took for us to come round.
Do what you feel is right, and be happy. I would NEVER discourage anyone from emigrating, and I would certainly say to any one who tries it, and then goes back, at least you tried. The only things in life that you will regret, are the things that you could have done, but didn't. Happiness must follow you where ever you go, if it doesn't, it may well be time to take a step back to the last place you left it.
Best of Luck.
#203
BE Enthusiast




Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 487
From: Ottawa











I share your sentiments exactly, as we too are in the same boat. 6 months and looking to go back. The kids have lost their identity, and no longer 'enjoy' being kids. They miss friends, and the happy go lucky children we raised (15, and 12 yrs old), now just seem to go through each day with no spark, bacause the kids are not happy, the OH is also finding it difficult to settle, which has a knock on effect on the whole family.
I just wish that some of the people for who it has worked out, would take a moment to understand that one size does not fit all, some will try and love it, others will say that this is not for us. I find that some posters see a decision to return to where you came from as an attack on Canada, it is not. I notice some saying that you are using your kids as scapegoats, well hey, isn't the happiness of the kids exactly the reason that you originally made the decision to try and better your life. I for one can state hand on heart that even if myself and my wife didn't like it here at all, if the kids settled quickly and 'enjoyed' life here, we would give it as long as it took for us to come round.
Do what you feel is right, and be happy. I would NEVER discourage anyone from emigrating, and I would certainly say to any one who tries it, and then goes back, at least you tried. The only things in life that you will regret, are the things that you could have done, but didn't. Happiness must follow you where ever you go, if it doesn't, it may well be time to take a step back to the last place you left it.
Best of Luck.
I just wish that some of the people for who it has worked out, would take a moment to understand that one size does not fit all, some will try and love it, others will say that this is not for us. I find that some posters see a decision to return to where you came from as an attack on Canada, it is not. I notice some saying that you are using your kids as scapegoats, well hey, isn't the happiness of the kids exactly the reason that you originally made the decision to try and better your life. I for one can state hand on heart that even if myself and my wife didn't like it here at all, if the kids settled quickly and 'enjoyed' life here, we would give it as long as it took for us to come round.
Do what you feel is right, and be happy. I would NEVER discourage anyone from emigrating, and I would certainly say to any one who tries it, and then goes back, at least you tried. The only things in life that you will regret, are the things that you could have done, but didn't. Happiness must follow you where ever you go, if it doesn't, it may well be time to take a step back to the last place you left it.
Best of Luck.
#204
Forum Regular


Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 62








Hi,
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
#205
BE Enthusiast




Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 487
From: Ottawa











Hi,
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
#206
BE Forum Addict






Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,324
From: Near Kingston, Ontario











Hi,
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
IMHO, I think in your own mind you know if something is not right. We have been here for 5 years and lived in 2 different provinces but have decided that Canada is probably not for us. We are also pulling the pin and leaving Canada because we just can't see ourselves in old age here for various reasons that I wont bore you with. I wish everyone who has come here and found their own little niche in life the very best of luck but for some people Canada is not what they want nor will it ever be. However, I will also point out that I may not be the best at giving advice on permanency in a certain geographical location as I do have a somewhat chequered history of moving.
In our 5 years here we have met various people who have had differing attitudes towards Canada. Some have been very pro and some very anti for various and valid reasons relating to their own situation. What is for certain is that coming to Canada now is different to coming to Canada 5 years ago and I think that some advice you may get by some will be based on the process of moving to Canada a few years ago and which is not necessarily relevant to moving here today, again my opinion.
I have lived in both Australia and Canada and I have found (again totally my own opinion) that it is a totally different type of expat that goes to Canada and stays than one that goes and stays in Oz, not better or worse but certainly different. Because of this, I also think that for some, unhappiness in Canada is definitely dis positional and not situational and that for some, no length of time will make them happy here.
Some of those who have move here recently will know the hoops that one now has to jump through compared to a few years ago. Some may feel that perhaps what they may or may not gain in Canada is not worth what they may or may not have lost in your home country. It is not until a person does move that they can fully assess the gains or losses made. This process is highly subjective and usually very individually specific to the person experiencing or assessing it and can only be done whilst "On the ground"
In my opinion someone who comes onto expats and honestly expresses their true feelings especially when many are afraid to for whatever reason, deserves a big pat on the back and the respect of those expats yet to experience hardships. I think that honest posts such as this are absolutely essential to let others see that problems can and do arise and that it is perfectly fine and acceptable not to be happy sometimes and realise that immigrating is not necessarily always in everyone's best interests.
I have met some who simply can't afford to go back and others who feel that they have made their bed so they will have to lie in it. There also some others who pretend that they are well off but are really are doing it tough and won't admit it. There are also many I suspect who are suffering in silence here but think that they will be seen as a failure if they leave after telling everyone how great things will be in Canada. Then there are those who truly absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else. I personally believe that if you are unhappy just do what will make you happy whatever that may be.
Do not let yourself be brow beaten one way or another and do what you feel is right for you. I don't think that a person necessarily needs to be in a place for many years or even have to stay for a few years to know that they just don't want to be there. I admire those who can come on here and lay out their inner most feelings as sometimes British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" .
Some people but certainly not all, base their advice on their own situation or on this party line without fully understanding the posters situation. Moreover, there are also those who think that you must be doing something wrong and that you are to blame because you are not happy in a certain place and that it is what you make it. This type of opinion is utter nonsense and not even worthy of a response. Finally and thankfully, there is also the majority on expats who offer advice which is straight from the heart be it right or wrong but with really good and genuine intentions. It is because of this differing types of advice that you should ultimately do what you think is in your own best interest.
I wish you the very best of luck and hope you find what makes you happy
J
#207
Binned by Muderators










Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 11,708
From: White Rock BC











Yes, apart from this ...
A very good post ruined by a silly comment. Unless, that is, the moderators forgot to send me the memo on the party line.
... British expats can be a very tough and unsympathetic audience due a really strict party line that a few people on expats always feel compelled follow even if they really secretly disagree with the official line that "Thou shalt not be unhappy Canada in for any reason personal or otherwise and if you are, do not under any circumstances publicly express it or thou shalt be known as a decenter who will be forever cast from the clique" ...
#210
Forum Regular


Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 62








Sorry bad spelling and very well spotted, it should have read dissenter, I will try to do better in future. Also thanks to you, the last post was now my second last word on the matter.
j
j
Last edited by jjanj; Apr 10th 2011 at 2:27 pm.





