Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Hello all,

I'm a Canadian possibly moving to England looking for some advice from those who have done the same except the other way round. My partner moved to Canada nearly 5 years ago with his family, we met and had a son together who is nearly 2 now. His family has gone back and he would like to follow.

I'm not "sold" on the move yet. I love it here in NS, I've never been to England and we can't afford for me to even have a visit before moving there permanently. The visa fees and container would be expensive, not to mention the flights for us and the higher housing costs there. I'm prone to seasonal depression and am terrified at the prospect of not seeing a full sunny day from Nov-May. I'll miss the wide open, unpopulated spaces. I'll miss my family. I would love to have an extended visit in the UK, but I'm afraid I won't like living there. I've dreamed of travelling to the UK all my life but when faced with a permanent move I'm balking.

Do you have any advice for me? When you moved to Canada did you have reservations? Should I just take the plunge? It seems like some of you really love it here in Canada. I sure wish my fiance felt the same way. :thumbsup:

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Whereabouts in England will you be moving to?

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Take a bartending course.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Hi there

it might be worth checking out the Moving Back to the UK forum to get some advice. I moved to Canada back in 1999 and I'd never even visited before so I understand your apprehension.

FWIW I moved to the UK with my Canadian OH and he wouldn't dream of moving back to Canada (mind you he had lived here for quite a few years before). Oh and we do see the sun every so often so don't worry too much about the weather;)

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Don't mean to be a downer but England is as s**t for Canadians as Canada is s**t for English people.
If you're having reservations now, you'll hate it there, living in some else's culture, far away from all you know, family, friends, etc. You'll be too far away to visit very often, it'll be too expensive and all in all I suspect a miserable experience for you.
If he's bent on going back, separate now, so you can move avoid the inevitable later on, only then you'll have no power, control or support. Sorry to be so blunt, but unless you win the lottery over there, that'll be the reality.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Bedford area. I have no choice in the matter as that's where his parents are living and he'll be working for them.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Thanks, I'll check that out. Glad to hear your OH had a good experience, that's encouraging.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

I appreciate your honesty. What you said is what I've been thinking all along and I'm honestly not a close minded person. I have no real profession and we're in loads of debt so yeah, I would be stuck there for a long time. Hoping to win the lottery over here so we buy a home in England and Canada and settle this. :thumbup:

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Houses in the UK are MUCH smaller than Canadian houses - and are very expensive.

I moved to Canada having never been here before, with the notion that if I didn't like it, I could always return to the UK, although that may not be an option for you. You don't know until you try though ;)

I've never been to NS, so don't know what it's like there, but the UK is certainly more over-populated. They do have sunshine between Nov-May.... it just rains alot, even in the summer.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

You're right about that, I won't know until I try and I know I'd regret it if I didn't try at all. The drizzle shouldn't be an obstacle, lol.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Worst case scenario: you move and hate it. Your OH will not consider moving back and you now can't take your child back either, as your OH won't allow it. You are stuck for possibly the rest of your life.

Can you handle the that possibility? I'm serious. It can and does happen. HOpefully you'll fall madly in love with the UK and it'll be fine, but...

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

The problem you'll also face, is that you'll be a mum with a toddler, stuck at home. It'll be difficult to make friends as you won't understand their culture and probably don't want to go out every night, getting extremely drunk, screaming at the top of your voice and waving your tits about to every passing bloke. And to top it all off, Bradford?

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

On the other hand having a little kid may be an advantage most towns in the UK have plenty of mother and toddler groups where you can go and meet other mums:)

Anyway I better go and start drinking some Buckfast to get ready for another night of pucking and flashin' me tits:eek:

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

That's a scary possibility. I didn't even consider that OH might be able to prevent me from leaving with my son. I don't think he would do that but who knows?

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Bedford. Probably not much better than Bradford from what I hear. I'm not in the business of tit-waving but I might take to getting extremely drunk. ;)

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

I know Bedford well, I went to school there and my mother still lives there. She needs a new daughter as I am here so you can adopt her.

There are some lovely villages around Bedford, the river is very pretty, you can drive to the coast in 3 hours, easy reach of London and MK for shopping. I gather Bedford itself if pretty run down these days, recession and all that. It could be worse!

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

That's good to hear. I really haven't met many other mums here and I know there are lots around. Maybe the overpopulation thing would come in handy for making friends.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

That's good to hear as well. Thanks! I would definitely be making many trips to the coast as I've never lived inland. I'm a sea woman.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Seems you need to hear good things about the UK! :)

Here you go:

http://talk.uk-yankee.com/index.php?topic=3338.0

(Lots of other useful stuff on that forum too.)

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Then head off to Wells-Next-the-Sea in north Norfolk. Buy a Magnum (this is an icecream bar) and sit on the beach to eat it. It's not huge cliffs and waves but it is lovely.

You can also get to Cambridge easily, Milton Keynes is great for shopping, theatres, cinema. They have an indoor ski slope, real snow and cold stuff. Bedford has windsurfing, boating, rowing, golf, bloody golf everywhere. Try not to live in the town if you can. Also avoid Kempston. There are nice spots in both places but it can be rough.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Someone once told me not to make life-changing decisions until after 2 years of having a huge event occur in your life, such as major surgery or a baby (you may even be suffering from baby-blues)

We holidayed in Canada then applied for emigration from England. We miss our family, culture and BEAUTIFUL countryside and ease of commuting and not necessarily by car!!! On foot and cycling so much better and healthier lifestyle in Britain. The winters are not that bad, we get gorgeous sunny days in Nov and Dec then spring is sprung in March and all those colourful flowers start to bloom. In Ontario the winters are from Nov to March/April and are so much longer than British ones with no colourful flowers to speak of all green green green and not as nice a shade as UK grass. We find we have to plan everything we do in Canada whereas in the UK you could just go out and not worry about the ice snow and freezing rain - DANGEROUS stuff that no -one warned us about. The food and electric prices in Canada are ridiculously high.
British homes are lovely generally, the wages are twice that of Canadian wages, but the overall cost of living is on a par. Buildings, architecture and restaurants are so much classier in the UK.

Really, you sound very young and should have thought about starting a family with a foreigner without discussing long term plans. Also you have an idea about Britain that is not built on any of your actual experience of it as you have never been there. Try going there and seeing for yourself - many Canadians love it and ask why we emigrated from England to Ontario. As for being a young Mum you can join in toddler groups and meet a whole new lot of friends, your husband has a job with his family and in no time, you'll be able to afford to fly back and see your own family in Canada.
We're heading back this summer and can't wait.
All the best in whatever you decide

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

piece of advice dont leave canada for england for the love of god what as got into you, this once great country is no more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Seemed alright when I went back in October. All my English friends have lovely houses, great jobs, nice families and are thoroughly happy with the place. But then they don't read the Daily Mail or Telegraph and turn specific and isolated incidents and then theorize to generalized social pathologies.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

You don't know, which is why you need to think about it. I also recommend going to the MBTTUK forum for some insight into what it's like to be the partner stuck in a country you can't leave cos of the kids.

on the other hand, you might love it and the OH might be begging to come back after a few years :D

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Do you have a second job selling ice cubes to Eskimos?

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Yeah, I thought that was kinda sad tbh. Sorry Fled :p

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

No, because I didn't think it would be a permanent move. BOth the OH and I talked about heading back to Europe, which is where we met. I hadnt' spent longer than 2 weeks in Canada before I moved here as a PR. I had no/low expectations, honestly. I thought there was snow 6 months of the year and everyone had sled dogs.

I do love it here but I went through bad culture shock in the beginning and used to whine constantly about how much canada sucked :thumbsup: but I also knew that I liked it, which sounds contradictory, but that's how it was. However, once I got past the shock, it just 'works' for me on a lot of levels, but I wonder if it's also because a. I had low expectations (I did NO research before coming) and b. I thought we would leave if we didn't like it - the OH was up for that. I was also in my late 20's so probably easier to adapt, who knows.

So I guess my advice is to be prepared for the worst. The only thing that gives me pause is that you sound very close to your family. I am not close to mine at all. If you are close you may well find it a lot harder than I did. :(

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

lol, no second job but it is true about MK and the snow dome thing and I thought it might make a Canadian feel at home if they could stand the freezing cold and look at snow all year round.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Hiya.....

I have lived in four different countries and now have good friends in all of them!

How things turn out will, to a large extent depend on your attitude going into the situation. IF you just sit at home you will have a miserable time....However, if you grit your teeth and go to all the mom and tot groups that you can you will make friends and things will get easier. Having a child certainly helps. When you go to the parks make an effort to chat to other mothers. Some will be totally unfriendly but others will be better. In the UK the local churches often have little playgroups. It isn't fun to walk into a place and know no-one - believe me I have done it. BUT you simply have to do it and that is all there is to it. You have to accept that you will have to go outside your own comfort zone but hopefully not for too long.

You could also take a look at www.canuckabroad.com Maybe you might find some expat Canadians to meet up with....

England is different. The houses are small, the traffic is crap, a lot of the people are hugely unfriendly BUT....The culture is amazing, the countryside is beautiful, and a lot of the people are fantastic and sooooo funny!! Go for it and at least you won't regret never having done it.....

Good luck with everything
Lisa

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Many of us on this site may not be the best persons to ask as we're the ones that wanted to move away from the UK, all for various reasons.

Personally, I think the UK is a beautiful place; it has a bit of everything, coast, mountains, rolling hills etc etc. Unfortunately the UK has many problems now that, for us, made us feel it wasn't a place we wanted to raise our children any more. I allow my children far more freedom here in Canada than I would have ever have done so in the UK.

To be honest, I'm not over familiar with Bedford (driven through a few times). I'm sure much of it is very nice and I don't mean to offend anyone that lives there, but it isn't a place necessarily recognised for its beauty as say the Lake District, Cornwall or the Scottish Highlands etc.

Having a young child will, I think, help you meet people; it certainly has helped me when moving over here. You will meet other parents through parent and toddler groups, pre-school etc etc. You just need to make the effort sometimes.

There are differences in culture which take some adjusting to.

And yes, there's the weather. You do get sunny days in the winter time but I think it's fair to say you will get more grey and wet days than you will sunny ones and that probably applies to the summer too!

Personally, I wouldn't even contemplate moving to another country without first having a couple of visits. I know some people don't visit first and I think they are very brave. I came to Canada twice before we made the move over; once in the summer and once in the winter.

I know people have mentioned the scenario of you moving over, hating it and wanting to return home with your child and your husband refusing to allow you to remove your child from the country. In the UK, I worked for the Family Department of a solicitors office and we had some similar cases. Although there's no hard and fast rule, in most cases if the matter went to court, the wife was granted permission to return to her native country if it was considered in the child's best interest - ie. support of extended family etc etc. There's never a certainty but there's always the possibility!

It's true what others have said too about the housing in the UK. Property is very expensive and compared to what we have experienced here in Canada, generally much smaller. There are some parts of the country that are somewhat cheaper but I would imagine Bedford to be quite high due to its proximity to London.

If I had to choose between Beford and NS, I certainly wouldn't choose Bedford.

I wouldn't advise you not to go because you might absolutely love it over there. However, just give it some serious consideration. I know you said finances don't allow but I really would try to go for a visit first to get a feel for the place. A visit first will cost you a lot less than moving over, hating it and moving home!

Well I wish you well with whatever you decide and, if you do make the move, I hope you will be happy there.

:starsmile:

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

:thumbup:

What a great list... only read the first couple of pages and I think i want to go home :blink:

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

Taken from the above forum - things someone (from the US) said they would miss about the UK if/when they left :

"English TV.
Little old men in tweed coats riding their bikes along the street.
Narrow boats on the canal.
London.
Lush cosmetics shop.
Watching little kids in cute English school uniforms file along the sidewalk to school.
The cathedrals.
The museums.
Market Day.
The slower pace of life.
Being so unique in my neighborhood.
Proper english breakfasts.
Political flexibility.
The Guardian!!!
Being surrounded by gorgeous, varied accents.
Sunday roasts.
Pubs.
Strong, local beers.
Women in hats at weddings.
Non old-lady Bingo.
The countryside.
Sunsets over the Fens.
Little pheasants running all around the fields.
Ancient houses all over the place.
Preserved historical buildings.
Pub quizzes.
Christmas carol services in a church older than my country.
Gargoyles.
Flowers blooming in winter.
Charity shops.
English Maternity care.
Documentaries galor on TV.
BBC Radio 4.
Good public transportation.
Closeness to Europe.
The cool antique shops.
Having a different perspective on US goings-on.
Greener greens than I've ever seen before.
Green in the winter, too.
Ghost walks & stories in local pubs, houses, etc.
The friendly relationship between mainstream medicine and non-traditional medicine.
The dressier type of clothing available.

There's millions more, but that's just off the top of my head..."

:unsure::(

:D Cute list though ...

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

What, like the chiropractors suing the arse off Simon Singh for daring to say that they promote bogus cures for various childhood ailments? Glad to see that he won his appeal against the ludicrous ruling by David Eady, but it's nuts to suggest there's a friendly relationship between quack medicine and anything sane when the first recourse of the quacks is to the courts rather than to bother providing any substantive evidence that their quackery is anything other than bullshit.

<can you tell that I have (indirect) experience of the damage caused by dodgy chiropractics?>

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

I'm with you on this.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

I was very pleased about that result. Bloody quacks using the libel laws instead of clinical trials; it should never have got as far as it did.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

I really would recommend a visit before you decide. If you have people you could stay with in the UK, then you just need to track down a cheap flight.. don't Canadian Affair do cheapish summer flights from Halifax-London? It depends a lot on how you feel about the place, and what the area you are thinking of going to is like. Whilst there are some lovely bits of the UK, England isn't all the Lake District, just as Scotland isn't all the Highlands. We live in Glasgow and are very keen to get to Nova Scotia. To us, Britain feels cramped, grey, expensive (for houses), selfish. I was reading the local headlines on my phone today whilst waiting for a train, and there were 3 murders/attempted murders in the Glasgow area on Saturday. One a father and son attacked by a man with a sword, son killed, father in hospital. OK so I'm going off tangent, and before anyone leaps to the UK's defence, that is just how we feel about the place! And that is Glasgow, no idea what Bedford is like. But it does show it depends very much where you live - and where you can afford to live. I love the Highlands, but I can't live there because there is no work. In Nova Scotia I can live in the countryside but not be far from a town.

I guess it depends very much on the sort of person you are, what sort of things you like to do etc. Like people moving from the UK to Canada; some go and love it, some go and come back. You might love it, or you might not. I can't help but think it's quite different from Nova Scotia... but then my goal is to get to Nova Scotia so of course I'm going to say that :)

I've rambled quite a bit... when I probably could have just said - I really think you should try and visit first before you decide, if you can. Good luck whatever you decide :)

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

It's that fool Eady. Why the hell is he still a serving judge - he must have broken all records by now for the number of decisions overturned by higher courts.

Bit of a threadjack, though - apologies to OP.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

What a w***er.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

My wife is a cradle. We moved from Vancouver to the UK then to Toronto. Although she didn't seem that keen when we were in the UK she now quite misses the place and we are playing around with a possible move back to London. I quite like the feeling of living in 1978/9 (kind of like just before Thatcher) again but not sure how long the novelty will last.

Re: Advice for a Canadian moving to England?
 

The Winter of Discontent, Callaghan and Healey, The Jags, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Anna Ford :thumbup:, Keith Moon :( Lager 35p a pint and king size 555's Ahh the good days.