In your case, you would be an exception. I would actually pay extra for you to be sat next to me

I sat on a plane between two women who were of "large" size and it was insanely comfortable. They didn't have the traditional rotten sausage smell, and they were warm and soft like big meaty pillows. I would have taken a nap between them but they got their slightly-less-tremendous husband to switch places with them. I sort of want to make friends with two obese women for the sole purpose of fat-napping.

And your prospects of surviving a crash would have been greatly improved.

"should lager passengers pay more on planes?"

Major discrimination of those who drink


Tsk tsk.

Well at least its nice to know that those of us who are larger than average small of rotten sausages.

I'm really glad I bothered to log in now.

jeez are you not there yet

2 hours late already, only just hit Singapore. I've had no sleep for 36 hours due to people talking to me every time I closed me eyes, feel and look like sh*te. They just called the Brisbane flite, I may just get on that and throw myself out halfway! Look out sharks.....dinner is on its way!

(Waving at Polly from hotel in Singapore)

2 hrs late

no sleep for 36 hrs


Bernie is in for a treat when you arrive mate

yes, and put some clothes on next time

But I'm packing, and it's hot Do you think I look good - today I had a facial, eye treatment, all-over massage, got covered head to toe in paraffin wax and wrapped up in plastic and an electric blanket til I sweat, head massage...total detox and relaxation...shame I then shopped til I dropped At least I resisted an invitation to the pub

All that rigmarole and your Mary is still looking more like Tasmania than Brazil

go get it waxed you filthy animal

Self-censoring jokes about Changi landing strip

ready for a jumbo arrival me thinks

I can't work out if you're the reincarnation of Frankie Howerd or Sid James.

(Or is it Hilda Baker?)