HelenTD

I can confirm what Wendy has posted, as we have experienced sharing the cost of a retaining wall. Our back boundary is higher in places than our neighbour's and also lower in places. If we had built the retaining wall that we were responsible for on our side of the boundary, and the neighbour had done the same on his side, we would have ended up with a dog-leg (and dog's breakfast) of a retaining wall with fence on top. Instead, we have placed the retaining wall and fence straddling the boundary and we shared the cost. The property title had to be amended to show an easement along the boundary.

I still think that as well as checking the rules on retaining walls in your local govt area, it would be worthwhile checking on the block boundary. Perhaps it doesn't happen in parts of the country with soil, but here in the Land of Sandgropers, fencing sometimes drifts over the years, so you think that your boundary is where the fence currently is, but that might not be correct (a surveyor can confirm). Another question is whether either owner has done any landscaping over the years, artificially changing the level of their block and in theory it is possible to change the responsibility for the retaining wall.

Surely the local council can inspect and communicate with your neighbour, as there are those questions of liability if someone gets hurt or something gets damaged. Keep putting everything in writing.

asprilla

Dadagain I reckon you're in the right here. If your neighbour has a responsibility to make that repair, then she should at the very least accept that responsibility instead of simply ignoring you, which I think is pretty pathetic.

Given that your neighbour is "living in poverty" and "hardly has enough money to feed her kids" (which I find hard to believe - I bet she's got enough money to run a car?) then perhaps you will end up paying for the majority of the repair bill, and she might only make a small contribution.

If I was in your shoes I would probably get in her face, explain that I want this sorted, gauge her reaction. If the money is an issue then at least get some contribution from her. At least get her to accept responsibility. Perhaps she might only pay 10% or 20% towards the total...and it might be spread over the course of a year. Surely she can't have any issues with that.

If she won't even speak to you, won't take any responsibility - well then I'd just go via the legal channels and see what happens, regardless of your odds of success.

Kooky.

Some of you are all heart.

moneypenny20

If someone got in my face, regardless of how much money I may or may not have, I'd be seriously pissed off.

TiddlyPom

Wow, when did you become quite so judgemental?
Been in a situation where you've not had enough money to feed your kids? I have. And a car was a necessity.

Can't have any issues? You think 'no money' means she's got a bit stashed away? You think she could sell something to keep Dadagain happy?

Good advice... yeah, clog up the legal channels with a stupid issue which will waste everyone's time and effort and take away attention from issues that really need it. Guess who pays for that? You do...taxpayer.

FFS.

Build a fence and get over it. Bunch of nutters.

Kooky.

Don't waste your time, Tiddly. Some of these people obviously have no ****ing idea how the other half live.

DadAgain

Yeah - she could start by selling the $650,000. 4 bedroom house she has all to herself 12 days a fortnight.

(in many ways she's an ideal neighbour - never makes a sound, makes no fuss - but if she can't afford to live the surely it's time to convert equity to cash?

moneypenny20

Do you know for a fact she owns it?

rasen78

That's assuming there is any equity. Perhaps she can't afford to move. Is it hers to sell? We can all make assumptions about our neighbours, but that's exactly what they are.

My advice would be to write her a very polite, non-confrontational letter with some suggestions about what could be done and invite her to make some suggestions too.

Cheetah7

We have a dividing fence - asbestos, solid little bugger it is as well - withstood the worst of the Perth storms but it is an eyesore. We get on really well with our neighbours and have said when we can afford it, we will split the bill in half.

Their first baby is due soon and Mr PP and I cant afford it either so our solid, ugly fence will live to see another day/storm but when we are all in a position to replace it, we will - no arguments (thank god).

asprilla

sorry Tiddlypom I just don't buy this. How can a person living in (and presumably owning) a 4 bed house in an affluent area of a capital city, not have enough money to feed her own children? I'm guessing that she's got a 4 bed house, a car, probably a nice big tv, a double door fridge, a boat on the back lawn... but - just not enough money to feed the kids - let alone fix up that fence !!!!

I suggest that you get out there and actually speak to someone who is poor. By poor, I mean genuinely poor. Then explain to them how they can still run miraculously run a car for everyday usage.


Getting back to the subject in hand. Tiddlypom I think you're more than a little bit biased in an emotional sense towards the single mum next door. Dadagain is clearly annoyed about the money. But the way I read this (and I could be wrong) he is more annoyed about the evasiveness of the neighbour.

Even single mums can have the decency to simply say "I know it's causing you guys a problem but I don't have the cash to fix it at the moment". It's not hard.

asprilla

me too. "Get in her face" was the wrong choice of words.... what I really meant was, simply speak to her and don't let her duck out of it. Don't be confrontational. Just tell it how it is, and see what she says.

asprilla

Sounds like a good plan.

Put a deadline on there too. "please respond within 72 hours or I will be pursuing this through the courts".



(ok just kidding with that last sentence. Don't kill me tiddlypom.)

TiddlyPom

That's the problem with this thread. The assumptions that you all have about a woman struggling to feed her kids, not my emotional connection.


Funny, thanks for the advice. You mustn't have read the thread properly.

I could imagine she's finding it hard having a guy chase her for money. As I said, send someone who's got a little charm, or perhaps isn't a bloke. Who knows her past? To repeat myself, perhaps she got beaten up by her ex or perhaps she's just a skanky ho. Who knows?

No-one here has got a clue what it's like to be on the bread line and not be able to pay for food apart from a couple of us. If you did, you wouldn't be spouting crap like this.

Ah, the bottom line. You think she's got no right to live in her house because she's not got the money currently to build a fence you want. Good and I'm glad we cleared that up.


Good luck with the fence DadAgain, do let us know how it plays out. : )

DadAgain

ok - this thread needs to go dormant for a couple of weeks until some stuff gets sorted out - but heres a bit more of a background.

They bought the house back in 2002/3? I'm guessing for around $350k - so YES they bought it, but you're right I have no idea how much equity she has now - she could have remortgaged 6 months ago and be up shit creek.

About 6 months after moving in she kicked her husband out and although there was a short period of fiery outbursts, it all seemed to get fixed up pretty quickly (I guess it always does when viewed from the 'outside'?). Oddly enough, she got to keep the house, he got custody of the kids except for alternate weekends (which seems very unusual). I'm guessing that if there was a history of abuse from him then that wouldnt have happened - so although its still an assumption - I doubt very much she has been a victim of domestic violence. (Apart from anything else she's built like a boxer - lean, wiry, muscly and lives in the gym - not that that makes being a victim impossible of course).


Have I been confrontational? In this thread I may have let off a bit of steam and floated a few 'out there' suggestions - but really thats what the internet is for isnt it? Let off steam with strangers so you dont end up offending someone who matters. The timeline goes like this:

2008 - Had a brief friendly chat (after 'THE' storm) with next door about the degrading fence. We both agreed it needed fixing and that a bit of gardening work removing trees on both sides would be a good start. She suggested (and I agreed) that collaborative efforts to clear vegetation would be helpful and then we could see if either of us had any contacts who knew about building walls/fences. Apathy on both sides resulted in no futher action.

2010 - Following further degradation, I spoke with her again about the increasing need for us to act. She once again agreed that collaborative action to remove the trees on her side (that she hates because they throw palm fronds everywhere and I hate because they are pushing the fence over) was the right thing to dofor a start - but that her lack of employment at that time prevented ANY financial outlay being viable. I agreed to wait until her situation improved. She was giving serious thought to returning to Police work, but wasnt sure... clearly not my business - but she was happy enough to have a pleasant conversation about her predicaments at that stage.

2011/09/10 - Further fence degredation: I knocked on her door to discuss in the morning and had no answer. When I tried later in the day (knowing she was in) her son (aged 13ish?) answered and said she was asleep. He suggested once more that attacking the palm trees on their side was a good plan of action and that his gran would be around the following week to help, but said he'd get his mum to come and talk to us.

2011/09/17 - After seeing the 'gran' arrive. I went to go talk further about the fence and was brushed off with "Who needs a fence?" and "We have to go go out - dont have time to talk" (before retreating into the house for the next 4 hours).


At no point yet have I discussed money with our neighbour, and I hardly think 4 attempts at conversation over 3 years constitutes 'relentless hounding'!


I will of course update this thread as news comes in! (I've contacted BCC to see if they can give me an indication of what the retaining wall situation is in our case and they say they'll get back to me).