So who is a Monty Python fan?

What are your best lines from the movies?

Brian: "You mean he raped you Mum?"
Brian's Mum: "Well, at first...yes!"

"Not the Watt Dabney, the inventer of the inverted firkin?"


Jaberwocky, probably not technically Monty Python but brill non the less.

"This is the machine that goes 'ping', it's the most expencive machine in the hospital"

"We are the knights who say 'Ni'"

Crucifiction?

I'm Brian and so's my wife!

Q: Are you the Judean People's Front?
A: F#$k Off! We're the People's Front Of Judea!

Brian: I'm not the Messiah! Will you please listen? I am not the Messiah, do you understand? Honestly!
Girl: Only the true Messiah denies His divinity.
Brian: What? Well, what sort of chance does that give me? All right! I am the Messiah!
Followers: He is! He is the Messiah!
Brian: Now, f#$k off!
[silence]
Arthur: How shall we f#$k off, O Lord?

Roman: I'm warning you! If you say "Jehovah" one more time (gets hit with rock) RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Stoners: She did! She did! (suddenly speaking as men) He! He did! He!
Roman: Are there any women here?

I'll have you know, my fwend Bigus Dickus w@nks vewy high in Wome

Life of Brian fan by any chance

Stan: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
Reg: But you can't have babies.
Stan: Don't you oppress me.

Help! Help! I'm being repressed.

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The end of the "I'd like an argument sketch" cracks me up.
O: I told you, I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid!
M: I just paid!
O: No you didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: No you didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: No you didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: I'm afraid you did not.
M: I don't want to argue about that!
O: Well, I'm very sorry but you didn't pay!
M: Ah hah! Well if I didn't pay, why are you arguing? Got you!!
O: No, you haven't!
M: Yes I have! (short pause) If you are arguing, I must have paid.
O: Not necessarily. (short pause) I *could* be arguing in my spare time.

'I'm opening a boootique, Brian.'

'Sheep don't so much fly as plummet'.

Death awaits you with nasty sharp pointy teeth. (Holy Grail)

What i wouldn't give to be spat at in the face. Favouritism, that's what it is. (Life of Brian)

Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People's Front?
Reg: **** off! We're the People's Front of Judea. Judean peoples' front....splitters.

Maitre D: And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint.
Mr Creosote: No.
Maitre D: Oh sir! It's only a tiny little thin one.
Mr Creosote: No. **** off - I'm full...
Maitre D: Oh sir... it's only wafer thin.
Mr Creosote: Look - I couldn't eat another thing. I'm absolutely stuffed. Bugger off.
Maitre D: Oh sir, just... just one...
Mr Creosote: Oh all right. Just one.
Maitre D: Just the one, sir... voila... bon appetit...
(Mr. Creosote swallows the mint, expands and then blows up dramatically, spewing vomit on everyone and showing his open rib cage and still beating heart.)
Maitre D: Thank you, sir, and now the check.
— Monty Python's The Meaning Of Life