Sam

i meant to add to my post



that i have told Alan he is welcome to have any member of his family visit and with the exception of one sister
me and the girls will enjoy the visit back to the UK if any of them choose to visit!

Sheff_Sparky

i know they will, and they will just get the door slammed back in their faces.

Didn't help us when we needed it, why should we help them now?

Sod them. My kids are more important that that lot any day.

madsad

very true.dont think i ever will tell my kids wot they can & cant do (when they are of age that is!) after all we have been through,we have both seen 2 sides of hurt & anger & how destructive that web can be.

Cheetah7

I have had people that I havent seen in years say to me 'Oh I will doss on your floor for a few months'

When I told them we were not doing the 'guest house thing' where people stay for ages, she said 'Thats fine, Ill sleep on your sofa'.

I know exactly who will and wont stay with me and for how long as well and I have already told some people that if they want to come, they can stay a couple of nights but after that its a motel.

Sam

good for you Sam

I wish i had done the ground rules before hand

i know have my Brother in Law and sister saying they want to come over in Dec,, not a prob!

and are bringing their 17 year old son and 15 year year old daughter

ok still not a major problem mind you thats 8 people in my house!





but to then tell me that the son and daughter want to bring their current girlfriend and boy friend (niether of whom we know) was crap


i told them that the kids and partners will have to stay in the garden in tents, NO WAY are they staying in my house!

eddie007

Some of my relatives and in laws are being crap, but on the whole, taking a balanced view.... which I wasn't this morning when I shared my life with you all... My parents are being fantastic, I have aunts, uncles and cousins coming out of the wood work (just had young cousin over right now, haven't seen him in 5 years, he is off to Afghanistan and I'm off to Oz, when he heard he came straight over bless his little cotton socks...) and NOT ONE of my friends has been anything other than positive about the whole thing.... No one is raining on my parade now as I am the lucky one going to the lucky country... as usual OH is totally right... (but if anyone ever quotes me on that I will deny it)....

Sheff_Sparky

At least things are not as bad as you first thought babe. You can alway come on here for a rant, we will support you and then just ignore you. only joking love. xx

Cheetah7

You have to be firm. It wouldnt be half so bad if people respected your property.

I wouldnt dream of treating someones house as my own home - at the end of the day it isnt.

Doing the cleaning and chipping in is the least someone can do, but rarely ever offer.

Dorothy

Years ago we had some friends who called and said they were coming out to our place for a two week vacation. "Great!", we said. "There's a fantastic B&B about 10 minutes down the road from us. We'll call and make your reservation". Surprisingly, they decided not to come visit.
I think it's very presumptuous of people to think they can just say they're going to be staying in your home without being invited.

eddie007

You can tell the parents of the kids who are planning a Gap year for their darlings... they are our NEW best friends...

we have always had an open house policy for friends and family, but I think we may have to revise this now we will be living some where desirable and not in blighty...

having said that I love having people to stay, I love catering for large numbers of people and I will welcome anyone who does their bit housework wise....

Cheetah7

Someone actually mentioned to me about their son doing a gap year and will 'choose Australia now'.

I never thought anything of it.

It is as though the whole world revolves around their kid and I dont mind being asked but when people assume I will look after their darling child then they are in for two hopes - Bob Hope and No Hope.

They can fund their gap year and their accommodation themselves. That is so bloody assuming that it takes the piss.

AndyR1976

What I would do is pick something that you don't like about your family - say your mum bought a new car, or they just moved house....then harp on and on and on about how they shoudl never have bought a new car cause the money should have went in their inheritance to the grand children....the car is too big and they won't be happy with it.....why on earth would they want a new car, the old one was fine etc etc.

See how long it takes before they get annoyed with you compaining about the decisions they make!!!!

Cheetah7

Its true, you often find when the boot is on the other foot they think its different.

There is a post on here by someone who moved back from Oz due to family pressure and when she got back, her parents moved away can you believe?

AndyR1976

I know you have seen some of my posts before and I just can't believe this is such a big issue for Enlgish people - are all english people so selfish?? (except for the ones on this forum, obviously).

Everything over here seems to be an issue and everyone is worried about everything all the time!

I'm going mental and I'm regarded as a loose canon at work simply because I don't take things seriously........honestly though, how seriously can you take the fact that the wrong colour paper has been put into the photocopier ('so just cahnge the fu**ing paper to whatever colour YOU want' was my recent reply to an email complaining of this exact thing......

Sheff_Sparky

that is not only nasty but hypocritical too. I can't believe that.