A Matter of Balance

Once upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him on the seventh day resting.

He enquired of God, “Where have you been?”

God pointed downwards through the clouds. "Look Michael, look what
I've made," said God.

Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, “What is it?”


It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."


"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused.


God explained, pointing down to different parts of the earth, "For example, Nth America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Sth America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot and Russia will be a cold spot."


"Over there I've placed a continent of white people and here I've
placed a continent of black people." God continued pointing to different countries.
"This one will be extremely hot and arid and this one will be very cold and covered in ice."


The archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to another area land and asked,” What’s that?"


"Ah", said God. "That's Launceston the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful people, impressive pubs; it is the home of the world’s finest drinkers, musicians, teachers, thinkers, and sportsman. The people from Launceston are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world.


“They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as speakers of truth."


Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance God, you said there will be BALANCE!"


God replied very wisely, “Wait till you see the wankers I'm putting in Hobart ”