US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Thank you so much to whomever responds :)) I'm a USC who has been "seeing" a Scot online via Skype twice a day for almost two years and we are finally ready to make a move jeesh! We are as sure as we can be at this point, that we want to be together but would like to actually spend time in each other's presence before deciding to actually make our commitment official.

I was under the ignorant impression that he could just get a passport and fly out here (Texas) and we would just wing it from there. Not so easy.

I've been combing the internet for hours and hours trying to figure out how to go about making that happen. We are chasing our tails trying to digest and make sense of the copious amounts of information, the ridiculous amount of red tape, and surprising difficulty in making our dreams come true in starting our life together.

One cog in the wheel of our "happily ever after" is that I am currently receive Social Security monies from the US gov because my husband passed away ten years ago and I'm raising our child alone. So a shotgun wedding is totally not an option in the event my Scots love has 14 toes and a third nipple, because by marrying I would surrender any further Social Security assistance from the US gov.

What do I do somebody tell meeeeeeeee! (and sorry I am so long winded)

Thank you thank you thank you...

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Choose, your money or your love.

Ok, that's a bit harsh (but a tad honest). Does your Scottish friend have any advanced skills, preferably a college degree, that might qualify him for an H1 visa in the tech industry or some other professional skills (medicine, law, etc)?

Is he young enough and rich enough to go to graduate school in the US?

Does he work for a large multinational in the UK and eligible to get a transfer to their US office?

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

He can come here on his passport via the Visa Waiver program and stay for 90 days so you can indeed meet.

Beyond that, if you do not want to marry, I agree that he'd have to find some sort of other way in - work is probably the best way, or as the other poster suggested, a student visa (not sure what the situation is).

If he is ever going to try to get a visa here, be sure he does not stay past the 90 days on the visa waiver program, which is calculated by the date on the I 94 (a form he will receive when he arrives - they normally staple it in his passport).

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

This is important. Don't overstay a VWP or any visa. Overstays can be a horrendous problem. Always book his flight back a week or so before his I-94 expires (note, it isn't always 90 days, just usually). That way you have some time should there be a last minute crisis.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Okay, soooo not what I wanted to hear. But thanks for the no-nonsense reply lol.

In answer to all your questions... no, no no and no. He graduated from the "Tech College" with a license as a painter/decorator, and has been self employed in that field for like 30-something years.

Is there a way for him to just come see the lay of the land like on just a passport, and then if all is rainbows and butterflies, he finds a job, and we get married after we actually know each other, and THEN applies for a work visa? Is the US that strict about it all?

Thanks a bunch for your quick reply :)))

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

If you get married, why even bother w/ a work visa? Spousal visa all the way.

And yes- penguin6 is right about the 90 days not always being exactly 90 days. That is why you have to pay attention to the date on the I 94 when he visits.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Wow thanks for your speedy reply too! Okay, this may be a long-shot, but is there a way, that he comes on that tourist visa thingy, and then we decide we want to be together, but not get married so quick, and we just take things a bit slower than the speed of sound, and I could start my jewelry business back up and then hire him 8-) ???

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Getting a job is the easy part.

It's the visa that is the tricky thing. The US doesn't give out visas for people to work in jewelry shops, or painters or decorators or carpenters or other types of jobs. The visas are designed (generally) on the idea that the person coming to work here either possess world-reknowned capabilities beyond that of any American (think David Beckham) or will contribute to the economy in such a way as to create other jobs for Americans (think an entrepreneur starting a company here, or a tech genius developing some code for a big US software company that makes billions from his work). Ok, that's the general 'happy smiley' face version of what the visas are out there for even if reality is slightly different.

Coming over on a tourist visa and then getting hitched is a RED FLAG!!! Do not do it! Go to the marriage forum and read a whole lot more about this. Your intent on a tourist visa is to 'visit' but when you get married it shows that your intent might not have been to 'visit' but to 'settle' and as such, you entered on your tourist visa under false pretenses. This can be a huge problem. If you do hit it off, send him home and make the arrangements for the fiance / marriage thing that way. Do not pop over to Vegas and think the visa thing will follow.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

'Tourist visa thingy' is the visa waiver program. It is intended for passport holders of certain countries to be able to visit the US and/or conduct business here for a short period (90 days) w/out having to get a visa from the consulate. Bottom line is he should not overstay on the VWP - not even so you can take your time and decide if you want to get married.

It's not ideal, but situations like this 99% of the time mean that the new couple has to spend some time apart while waiting on the immigration system. It sucks but that's what it is. It's either play by their rules or suffer the consequences for years to come.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

No, No, and No. A small jewelry business is not:

1. large enough to require foreign workers;
2. is not on the list of eligibility for hiring foreign workers on an H-1B;
3. he does not have qualifications for any H-1B visa; and
4. he is SOL in getting any work visa and his only hope of emigrating is through marriage to a USC.

And, no, he cannot come here to meet you for the first time with the intent to stay and marry you if he likes the looks of you in person and you like him because he remembers to put the seat down and dirty clothes in the hamper.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Oh and BTW the US is not trigger happy with the fiancee visa. You are just expressing your frustration at not being able to have what you want when you want it.

If you were going to the UK, he would have to do the same thing for your entry.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Thanks for all your time and advice Penguinsix :) I think I am starting to get it now. And I thought the US was laid back. Not so much. Okay so he visits, goes home, we apply for fiance visa from there. So not fun.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

It sounds like the two of you have not met in person yet. How about having him visit you for a week or two, then you both take some time to think about what to do next. Proceed with caution.

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Thanks for your messages. Yes, you're right, I'm totally frustrated. I thought the US was all about bending the rules. Hard to swallow that aliens that cross the borders illegally have more rights and benefits than actual life-long citizens. But what can you do? Nada...

Re: US a bit trigger happy with the fiance visa? How do I...
 

Thanks. Good advice :)