Well thanks for the vote of confidence people!.
Yes i know what i'm doing My divorce is 2 weeks from final, Sues is in the process, Yes it is still happening, her hubby knows everything and he is a very good friend!.He has offered to sponsor me if need be!.

There are alot of Good genuine helpful people on this forum, and alot of complete arseholes too!. Peole can never give good advice without being clever.
But thanks to all the NICE people who gave advice very much appreciated.

Is it just me, but WTF?????? !!!!!!!!

No, I also think it's a very strange carry on

This ostensibly is taking place in Michigan, right?

Texas law says that IF you have sex outside your marriage before your divorce is finalised, you can lose your right to community property AND have child custody heavily influenced. It matters not if your divorce drags on for years; or how long you've lived apart. Texas doesn't recognise a "separated" marital status: you're either single or married.

So it stands to reason that a lot of people in the middle of a divorce will go to great lengths to get dirt on the other partner. It's sad, and really, the lawyers get more money out of it than anyone, but some people will use every means at hand to deny their soon-to-be-ex a penny more than they absolutely have to hand over.

What if soon-to-be-ex-husband is clever? This woman's divorce IS NOT FINAL yet and there are children involved. I don't know about Michigan, but I know for a fact that a family court judge here would find this entire situation completely deranged and likely be sympathetic to the father if he changed his story and began to object to the situation.

Mr Derbyshire.... I'm not trying to be judgmental here. But you have no idea what the American court system is really like. Think about the most prude stern people you've ever met, and then try to convince them that some bloke whose wife you're shagging in front of her kids and your own is really going to PAY to support you.

Its no good getting upset because people are 'judgemental' about your circumstances. You ask questions on a public forum obviously without doing a shred of homework on the actual marriage based visa process and then get uspet when people give you the bad news.

So you've enjoyed your meeting ... gone and gotten engaged, now you have to face reality. Divorce in Michigan can take from 2 years upwards, yours may be but weeks off but the hard facts are that you cant even begin to petition for K1 until she has her decree absolut in her hands.

Time to sit and take stock if you ask me .... 2 years is a long long time

Jan

Oi Jan,

What do you reckon the Michiganders would make of the situation if the husband contested property division and/or custody based upon the wife's having what is, technically, an affair?

Around here we have to wait until the decree is issued (we don't have Decrees Absolute -- the divorce process can take as little as 90 days or can go for years!) until we even DATE someone or it can affect the outcome of the divorce.

Perhaps Michigan is more sympathetic?

To be honest I dont know if the court has any influence on what happens after a couple have officially seperated in Michigan ... I do however know that there is a minimum amount of time divorce takes here along with councelling and all that good stuff.
I was just stating that the OP needs to do his homework .... read read read the rules are very clear .. you cant petition until both parties are free and clear to marry.

Jan

........ unless they are mormon of course .... hmmmmmmmmm

I believe you'll find that we are trying to watch your back for you, as fellow brits and ex-pats we have somewhat of an obligation to tell you what we know from living on this side of the pond. We don't know your girlfriend and don't presume to but you really should read these posts (weeding out the joking ones which you will always get on an open forum) and take the good advice from the others.

We're a blue state..........so yes, things aren't so black and white here.

LOL, I sure have been there!! There are phone plans in UK that seem to be much cheaper than here in the states

Best of luck to you both, the process is a long one and different from case to case. It is NOT easy, Ive been there, my advice, chin up and ALWAYS think positive, its worth it in the end.

I blame that on the cold winters


NC Penguin