Ray

A VAWA will not get you citizenship ...

snowbunny

But it could get one permanent residency.

Ray

She already has a GC due any day .......
if she gets divorced ..she can apply for the removal of condition immediately after ...

ImHere

And then would it be a 3 year or 5 year wait? Since its a 5 year wait for a non-marriage GC.

Ray

It would be the 5 years

ImHere

Ah. Thats what I thought. Still better that than put up with that jerk I would have thought.

Lion in Winter

Well from what I've seen of Sibsie (virtually speaking of course), she's a strong character and I think she'll sort it. Bullying only works if the victim is prepared to be a victim, and I don't think Sibsie's that sort of person at all.

ladylisa

She needs to be back to the bossom of her family, safe and away from boiling rabbits bloke...

Neathborn

Sibsie, just wanted to add my best wishes whatever happens. My husband and I have a joint account and always have, but it was a mutual decision. However, over the past few years I've inherited some money and my husband always insisted that it should be in my name only. I think you need to go with your gut feeling -- if it doesn't feel right, then it probably isn't. None of us (I don't think!) know your husband, so you alone are in the position to know if what he's asking is unreasonable. I wish you good luck and hope things work out for you the way you want.

silvermine

oh right... well hopefully being a british citizen will not diminish rights in case
of divorce here. with inheritance it may be another matter. my understanding is in case the guy dies that is.. in the absence of a will the wife gets it all, if they are a US citizen...but otherwise???

silvermine

for sure it's a tight little island we have here...

Leslie

It pisses me off too. But, she is a survivor and she's already making her plans. I can see her processes and I recognize them very well.

The thought..... the word.... the deed....

It takes a while to even realize what's going on. Once you firmly recognize the problem you start doing a sort of mental and emotional inventory. What you need to hold on to and what to let go of, so to speak (and I'm not just talking about material possessions here). Sibsie has started talking about it now, that means she halfway there.

Guelder Rose

Very true ... in such situations, material possessions are not the only consideration. I know from experience that it can take a while to fully realize what is happening in this kind of situation, and that once you do realize, it is better to take time to plan what you need to do, rather than act in haste.

ImHere

Aye. I have been on more than one job in the past where we helped a woman (and in one instance a bloke) get away from a violent relationship. They had to make the moves, legally all we could do was give support and prevent any more domestic violence occuring, especially if there were kids involved. Some of the bravest people I've had the honour to help were those that had the guts and determination to get out of a nasty and potentially violent relationship. It takes one hell of a strong will I would imagine. I hope theres no violence here for sibsies sake, but it still aint easy to throw it all in on a relationship, no matter how bad it is. This is when she needs real friends.

evoal2003

So whats yours is his and whats his is his own. Yeah right.

Protect yourself sibs put your savings in your families name....

alan