Tootsie Frickensprinkles

Hi Gypsygirl, a few things came to mind throughout this thread.

Unless you were planning on coming back to the UK and supporting your family working in the hospitality or agricultural industries then the whole eastern euro immigrant media hype will be utterly irrelevant. The sarcasm was intended, I have spent considerable periods back in the UK over the last 2.5 years of predominantly being abroad and these people make little difference to the vast majority of the British public. What they do do, however, is show up the lazy arsed British born dole bludging ****wits for what they are.

I find the attitude of some Brits towards this issue, xenophobic, narrow minded and VERY short sighted. But that's just the opinion of another outsider for you. The commentary of the Daily Mail has a lot to answer for. I think you should take this sort of headline scaremongering with a huge dose of salt.

Since the EU expansion the only "real" issue of piss-taking I've heard about is some several hundred unaccompanied Romanian children being sent over and the UK authorities having to deal with them. Hardly the kids faults though.

I spent the first 3 months in the US unable to drive legally and car less, if you are going to stay this has to be a priority to change. The difference is indescribable.

I tend to stay out of advising people on this question as I personally, for a multitude of reasons had a disastrous experience in the States and therefore am probably quite bias in my evaluation of things but .. one thing stood out to me.

With 4 kids, and without the guaranteed means to put them through college, I would worry about their futures. Whilst I realise going to Uni's is no longer as financially easy in the UK either it is still *far* more affordable here and will remain so imo. Also, not having a college education in the UK is nowhere near as debilitating in the job market. We have decent free vocational further education and employers that still value experience and otj training.

Also, some numbers for you to consider. It costs an average 250k dollars to raise a child to the age of 18 in the US and an average 165k pounds in 'London' to raise them to 21 including new education fees.

Bias aside, I look at my OHs family over there, half of which "do well" and half of which struggle to make ends meet (mostly despite working hard). I know where I'd rather be in the latter situation. Only you know where you think your financial situaion will progress to.

krizzy

I don't get lost that often...I drove for a living in the UK...you just learn to drive by using N-S etc...and landmarks...

jumping doris

I would find it very hard not being able to drive here. I would be trapped on my neighbourhood

It was a bit nervewracking for the first few days but I love driving and I enjoy driving here. I spend hours trying to persuade my family to do big roadtrips!

I am on my own in the day and I just get in the car with the dog and we go all over the place...any little road that looks interesting, we take. I never worry about getting lost, even in the city and I don't have SatNav.
We have found all sorts of things on our travels and met other dog friends, some of whom are now really good friends.

A big turning point for me was planning our daughters graduation party. I realised how many people we knew...too many to invite! And that wasn't counting "slight acquaintances" and what was more they are people I have grown to like and I would miss them if we went back.

gypsygirl

Thanks for this, I get what your saying about the immigrants. I wanted to get more opinions on how bad it actually is over there. I do see the doctors as a problem in our areas back there, due to overbuilding there already is a shortage of them. As they moved alot into our area, I can see that would cause issues, its only a small place.

I cant see me being able to drive until next year. Right now our priority is to get back and see family, so we are saving for that. We cant go until later in the year anyway, as they are renewing our H1-b. Then of course its Christmas next! Its never ending, this is why I dont already have one with moving and having babies lol. I dont know where the heck Id go with one anyway, there isnt anything to do here in the week, everyone else is working to pay for their homes

Finicially forus its swings and roundabouts. DH has a wonderful job for a big international company here and they are training him to be a manager. If we move to the Uk he would have to leave the company as they are in London and we couldnt afford to live within any reasonable travelling distance of there. The house prices in England are insane, we definately wouldnt rent, we have been there, done that and burnt the t-shirt

To me college is important, I cant see how they could do it here unless they work their ass off and never slept, to pay for it themselves.
We did think about moving to Ireland as there is dh company in Dublin, but then again I hear all sorts about them not liking the British and cant get any sensible truth about that to form an opinion.

We are comlete hippys and partly self sufficient. So when I say we have a nice house and no money etc, I dont mean we have a brand new home with a pool and no money for shiny things! We have a run down place that needs fixing up (its really old but we love it) and pretty much everything we own is second hand. We knew it would be a struggle when we came here, we were prepared to deal with it because its where we wanted to be.
Everything that could go wrong did, we actually had to come here on a promise and $11 as the agency had messed our wages up, we didnt get any more for 3 days. We should have took that as a signal and stayed where we were.
So to leave would seem a waste of the struggle we put up here to make it work and of the years and years we spent trying to move here. We have 6 acres of pure peace here (apart from the disgusting bugs lol) and dh has a good job. The lifestyle is less dramatic here, less queues and traffic, less arguments etc etc Im sure you know the rest. I think money aside, our basic quality of life is better than it was in the Uk, but money is so darned useful

Tootsie Frickensprinkles

Yes, house prices have become ridiculous, and quite un-doable if you dont have a foot on the rung already.

Company sponsored training is always a good thing obviously, is it a long term thing?

jumping doris

Your house sounds lovely. We had always lived in old houses that needed tons of work until we came here Our house is 35 years old and needs tons of work which we can't afford to have done and we have no time to do ourselves. We have always done our own work and here OH is at work all the time.
We wanted an old house here with land but we've ended up in a fairly souless neighbourhood, purely for the schools.

Our eldest is off to college here later this year and it isn't as expensive as we expected. Hopefully by the time she is in her second year she will be able to work and she will have to get a loan but all her friends in the UK are having to work and take out loans.
The big schools here are expensive but she is going to a small state college.

Tootsie Frickensprinkles

Is that classed as a community college?

jjmb

Glad to hear that things are settling down for you Doris. I remember when our daughter started Uni 4 yrs ago and thinking it was the end of the earth as how were we going to afford the fees. Well, we did and at the end of her third year, our son started Uni, so we were faced with 2 lots of fees and living expenses but we got through the year again without too many hassles. Now Elisabeth has finished her degree but the youngest is about to start. 4 more yrs and we will be free...whhoa!

Comparing costs with the UK, based on the new higher fees being introduced in England and Wales and stated living costs on the Uni sites, we worked out that we are only paying a couple of thousand dollars more than if we had been in England. It helps that we stated from the beginning they had to stay in State which a lot cheaper option.

My daughter is now on her own as of August when she starts her masters. She will have to take out loans for living costs but her fees will be paid by the Uni as she has got a teachers assistants position.

As to the OP, don't despair, things seem hard at the moment but they will get better. Hopefully by the time your kids get to college age they will have gcs and able to work. If not, make them take out loans as they will need at least a degree to get a decent job over here.

I suspect everyone on this board has gone through this part of emigrating. Been here 7 yrs now, gone through the terrible teens unable to work, no car and then everyone's taxi driver period and I have finally managed to settled into a life I am happy with.

krizzy

I was looking for a house last night near a job hubby is looking at...found a 1900 Victorian..5 beds two living area..2 bath $235k...found a place on a lake...not that old...1930s..small just right to retire...my dad would love to walk down the garden and fish from the dock...$325k..you are talking millions for homes like that on the Cape...I loved nearly every house I looked at for a different reason...everyone has a pool if you go to high in price....which I don't want so that cuts out a lot of homes over $300k...

We do all our own home repairs and upgrades...I like to work with what is in the house...and keep it to style..no new kitchens or bathrooms if the old ones can be saved...

penguinsix

Community colleges are 2 year 'associates degrees'

Most small state schools are also know as 'directional schools', i.e. South Florida, East Carolina U, Eastern Illinois U, Northern Michigan U., etc. They generally offer 4 year bachelors (along with graduate programs) and attract a regional student body.

The state 'flagship' schools are the monsters, 30,000+ students, slightly more than the directional schools in price. University of Illinois, Michigan, Cal-Berkely, Univ. of Montana, etc.

The instate / outofstate tuition at public schools can be a savings of $10,000 or more in many cases. If they are really close they can live at home and save even more money (though drive the parents a bit crazy).

gypsygirl

Oh nice We have an 1825 house, but they think its older than that. The records office burned down that year so could well be. I think there was a stone house here before this one, that someone landscaped the garden with instead. It needs alot of work, but we do it ourselves too and its very rewarding. I could use getting some help, but we cant afford it, so training the kids instead lol.
The garden is SO overgrown and wild, its really hard to keep on top of it. We just discovered an old buried stone path we are relaying. I couldnt live in a new house they are too sterile for me. Our house in England was a 300 yr old stone cottage which we miss very much

Tootsie Frickensprinkles

Thank you.

Now that top up fees got through, having seen FL State fees it can be almost as expensive as sending kids through State (especially if living in state colleges). Scotland and Wales are still free mind, if you stay within the borders to study. I think the undergrad course fees of the online BSc the OH was doing are pure extortion though.

The difference is, that cost in the UK doesn't exclude you from the centres of excellence. I can still choose, LSE, Oxbridge, Durham, UCL medical etc etc. Based on merit and not $$$$. That's an aside though, it can't be easy seeing 3 or 4 kids through higher education anywhere.

jumping doris

No. It's one of the State Universities. She is doing a BA in Fine Arts at Edinbororo University up near Eerie.

jumping doris

From what I understand, years ago in PA each of the State colleges had a specialty and more or less stuck to it. Now they all offer a wider choice but still are known for their specialties. Edinboro, which is where she is going, was the Art School and teacher training one. Today it is still highly regarded in PA for those things but also offers a wider choice.

jumping doris

That was and is how I feel I really miss my old house but where we live there really aren't any very old houses...one or two but the likelihood of them comming up for sale is slim. One of them was for sale just as we were moving here and they couldn't sell it. I watched it on the internet for over a year and it sold just weeks before we were able to make an offer on it.

There are some beautiful old houses around here but they are in poor school districts. Once our youngest is through high school we'll be on the move.