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anyone else have problems adjusting??

anyone else have problems adjusting??

Old Dec 7th 2007, 5:15 pm
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Default anyone else have problems adjusting??

Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 5:32 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

i nearly choked when i read pre fab housing!! oh u took the words out of my mouth! They have that so that when the hurricane comes it just takes the houses with it on the tracks so we can build new in its place!!! less hassle that way and less debris. ( they aint heard the song of the three little pigs)

I find u either love it or u hate it, or u just get used to it. I am lucky that with my job i can go home pretty much when i want, so am making the most of that. The land of milk and honey it isnt, but there are some pretty neat things here that are not back home. As with everything, u only live once, so if u hate it that much ... leave!!! I find also that with a bunch load of close friends its easier. There are times when i really do shake my head though and think... only in America!!!

It took me a while but i am ok now, wish I had a brick house though with radiators and not this blowing crap at 3 in the morning. I pray for peace and quiet sometimes...
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 5:50 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

I arrived at about the same time as you. I'm not struggling to adjust as such, even though everything is so very different, but then, I didn't intend to stay here, but met Mr W(onderful) and ended up married to him.

I'd like to move from suburbia to the older part of Sac which, in my opinion, has a bit more character, somewhere where I could walk to a restaurant that isn't on a car park, or that doesn't have a menu that's replicated every 3 miles (Chilli's, olive garden blah blah blah).

So I think what I'm saying is that what your finding isn't unique. I too find it a bit soulless in California, but I'm working towards a compromise for me and Mr W.

Lets face it, if we're trying to compare the US to the UK we're on a road to nowhere. It's different, there are good things and bad things. I sold my UK house last year - it was a converted church built in 1827, and the yanks think something built in 1927 is prehistoric! so our terms of reference are going to be completely different.

Anyway, enough rambling from me, I hope that you find a solution to your issues and are happy wherever you decide to settle
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 7:07 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
America is what we doctors call massive, really big. I mean its phenominally, ridiculously gynormous!
There is actually a lot of diversity across the place as far as climate, local personalities and culture goes.

You are in a part of the country that has history alright.
The 60's, 70's and 80's (and the 90's - but they were a bit naff!)

If you have the time, money and energy why not try somewhere else and see how it goes? There really are places here where the history goes back 300 years and the feel is quite "villagey"

Bon chance.
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 7:26 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
I'm a yank, so can't really talk to adjusting. Though I admit I might find parts of California difficult.

There are so many different places, cultures, landscapes in the U.S. There are small towns where you can walk around and shop. There are places miles and miles from shopping malls. No pre-fab houses anywhere near where I live for example.

If one place isn't for you - try looking for another. Travel around a bit if you're able...

Welcome - and good luck!
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 7:38 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07)
I see the problem, Corona, CA is not exactly an all American town. People here in Orange county (OC) thinks that the San Bernadinians should be required to take visa to come to OC

If you don't like to drive then you have to move to a big city either San Francisco or Manhattan. Other small towns are nice but public transportation at night is bad or non existence, me thinking Lawrence, Kansas, beautiful college town with good public transpotation (day time).
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 9:05 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

I have been in the USA since 1999 and go back twice a year to England, except for the last 14 months, ( hopefully athe final stage of residency ) I am now in Florida and have visited 26 of the states and lived from NY to Maryland 5 of those years, I understand all too well where you are coming from. There is no doubt that this is one of the most beautiful/diverse Countries in the world but the lifestyle is difficult to adjust to, even now it is difficult for me and get very homesick, thankfully I kept my house in London ...... I often wonder if my problem comes from being a City person. I think you need to vent off steam with other Brits ..... you will feel better and find that they have the same difficulties as you, for me worse now as it's the longest I have been away. I know this is of little help but know you are not alone. Zed
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 9:07 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'.

Cheers..
20 years and counting. Still working on it
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 9:13 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 9:22 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

meh.

Having a job helps...hasn't really bothered me that much though...but a lot probably depends on circumstances, how old you are when you move, if you have a family or not etc.
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Old Dec 7th 2007, 9:26 pm
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by Lord Lionheart View Post
20 years and counting. Still working on it
Off topic... I used to live in a small village in the UK, where there was still a blacksmith, anyway, the blacksmith took his old Dad down the pub, and the Dad got chatting to this fella there.
The old boy asked "how long have you lived in XXXXX?", the fella responded, "oh, about 50 years now"
The old fella says "do you think you'll like it?"
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Old Dec 8th 2007, 12:26 am
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
Get out know while you can or you're be just like the others here who hate it but are trapped in a life of misery.
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Old Dec 8th 2007, 12:35 am
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Smile Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by benjipie View Post
Hi guys,

I'm a British citizen and I've been here (Corona, CA) since last June ('07) and i just cannot get use to living here. No matter what mindset i try to adopt, trying to maintain a positive outlook, i just cant adjust to the way of life over here....I don't understand why i cant just accept the way things are over here and just move on. I've lived abroad a few times, S. Korea for 2 years, Taiwan for 1 year, spent months backpacking all over South East Asia (had some pretty funky experiences) and adjustment has never been an issue, until i moved to California. It's the little things i can't get my head around, like, driving everywhere, the way people drive here (IMO is sooo bad), the pre-fab housing, shopping malls, California seems to be carpeted with malls and chain stores that add to a cultureless society ... It took ages (still going through the process) to get the visa to live and work here, but now I'm thinking was it all worth it?

Has anyone else had this problem adjusting or is it just me, or is it just California? How long did it take you guys do feel 'settled in'. Am i expecting to much? I'm not normally a complainer but as you can see I'm finding it pretty hard settling in here....

Cheers..
Culture Shock, it takes a while to come to terms with it with some people. I had visited the states and Canada many times before moving here, and I still found myself having to adjust to living here. It gets easier if you don't allow homesickness to get in the way.
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Old Dec 8th 2007, 1:22 am
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

I'm a wee bit surprised that my fellow peeps here in California have found the place a soul free zone.

I've had the opposite experience having lived in Los Angeles as well as being in the Bay Area now. There are plenty of museums such as the amazingly interesting Asian Art Museum, SF Moma and the soon to be spectacular Academy of Science and many more, maybe even too many galleries, both SF and LA have a great symphony, restaurants that create some of the best food (mind you - at a price) from around the world, countryside that encompasses forested areas, rugged coastline, beaches full of people as well as small quiet beaches, hiking trails, you can ski, shopping (for sure plenty of shops), book clubs..... the list goes on.

I agree with the house comparison but in a land that has earthquakes you probably don't want to be buried under a pile of bricks!

So my friends - get out! Explore, visit visit visit - you will have fun!
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Old Dec 8th 2007, 1:35 am
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Default Re: anyone else have problems adjusting??

Originally Posted by scotch03 View Post
I'm a wee bit surprised that my fellow peeps here in California have found the place a soul free zone.

I've had the opposite experience having lived in Los Angeles as well as being in the Bay Area now. There are plenty of museums such as the amazingly interesting Asian Art Museum, SF Moma and the soon to be spectacular Academy of Science and many more, maybe even too many galleries, both SF and LA have a great symphony, restaurants that create some of the best food (mind you - at a price) from around the world, countryside that encompasses forested areas, rugged coastline, beaches full of people as well as small quiet beaches, hiking trails, you can ski, shopping (for sure plenty of shops), book clubs..... the list goes on.

I agree with the house comparison but in a land that has earthquakes you probably don't want to be buried under a pile of bricks!

So my friends - get out! Explore, visit visit visit - you will have fun!
There are those that go out and enjoy life and those that prefer to take perverse pleasure in the own unhappiness.
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