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Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Old Feb 19th 2007, 6:50 pm
  #76  
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by HiddenPaw View Post
I feel exactly the same and emotionally, I'm all over the place. When OH first sought a work transfer and got a positive response, I really was excited; when the guy in Oz then didn't call when he said he would, I was full of fear that it wouldn't happen; when he did call and wanted to get the transfer underway I burst into tears with shock and fear. Then we hit a stumbling block and I was worried again it wouldn't happen. Now we've overcome that and it's all happening and I'm all over the place. One minute I want them to come back and offer a really crap package so we have to turn it down, the next minute I'm dreading not being able to go. It's horrible! I just want to fast forward my life to the next phase.

I am scared for the same reasons as you Michelle - last time we just went for an adventure, we kept the house in the UK, no children, just off to have a good time for a couple of years. This time we've got 2 children in tow, have to sell the house and I'm terrified that I'm going to get there and think OMG, what have we done!

I think deep down I know I want to do it, but I keep losing focus of exactly why we are doing it. Sometimes I just sit here and wonder why on earth we are doing this all over again.
Not You as well Hiddenpaw!!! IM so behind the times!
Its odd isnt it? You fantasise about going back, then when something smacks of the reality of it all, panic stations hit
It would be easy if i hated one place, but i never did. I was very ill out there and the effects made me go back, but from an outsiders view, it was ok really. i am so scared of going radio rental again but want to feel i have learnt coping mechanisms from the first time round.
im lucky - lovely people both sides of the globe.....but unlucky to not be satisfied with my lot
good luck and keep us posted
c xxx
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Old Feb 19th 2007, 7:00 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by chance to be View Post
Not You as well Hiddenpaw!!! IM so behind the times!
Its odd isnt it? You fantasise about going back, then when something smacks of the reality of it all, panic stations hit
It would be easy if i hated one place, but i never did. I was very ill out there and the effects made me go back, but from an outsiders view, it was ok really. i am so scared of going radio rental again but want to feel i have learnt coping mechanisms from the first time round.
im lucky - lovely people both sides of the globe.....but unlucky to not be satisfied with my lot
good luck and keep us posted
c xxx
Thanks C. To be honest, I've only really posted about it in this thread, so you haven't missed anything anywhere else! I've not really felt like talking about it on the forum, mainly because my head is all over the place. Aside from that, I'm up to my eyes in DIY!
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Old Feb 19th 2007, 7:18 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Hello Hiddenpaw

Thank you for replying to the thread.

I have read your posts on numerous occasions on various topics and always thought how sensible your comments are.

It has been sssssoooo refreshing to join in with these threads about ping ponging and realise that people are sharing the exact same emotions. Not that it makes the decision any easier mind you!!

I think that if/when we all decide to return, we'll hit the tarmac running, see the sun and think "right, here we go again" but with 110% effort and determination.

I can't believe the transition between Rooksie being uncertain and then all of a sudden the house is on the market and it's all systems go!

You never know, this time next year we may all be corresponding with each other and posting the obligatory 3-6 month update!

I wish you and yours all the best Hiddenpaw and please keep us updated as to how you are doing with the transition back to Oz.

Take care and keep positive

Michelle
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Old Feb 20th 2007, 2:15 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Hi There,

Yes I remember you too hidden paw. Guys, Im sort of a newbie...I haven't posted on here for ages. I remember reading Hidden Paws posts as I joined the site after we landed back in the UK.

I was in sydney for 6 years...got pregnant with first bub and headed back to uk. I feel that we are heading in the direction of back to oz.

Financially tho we may have to wait a bit.

Hidden paw...are you going back to melbourne?
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Old Feb 20th 2007, 7:36 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Hi Michelle, I'm having a good day today.....I'm really excited about going. I haven't seen my sister for 3 years and I spoke to her today and I just can't wait to see her again.

I think it's brill Rooksie's got the house on the market....talk about decisive!! Although I have wobbly days about what I'm doing, must admit, since making that decision, I have just felt so different. I've sat on the fence for 3 years, thinking that I'd never reach a conclusion. Now, it just feels right!

What percent are you and Mandy at today then?
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Old Feb 20th 2007, 8:02 pm
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about 70-80% today. I have just watched a program on Sky 3, 'Australias most deadly' and had the spider etc which I must admit, I don't miss one bit! It is nice to go out in the evening and not get bitten to death.

I just wanna make up my mind, deep down i think I reall want to go how do I make my son feel the same way? And then, how do I tell my dear old mum that we are off again, it nearly finished her last time?

Any advice? How did your family take the news that you are heading back?

Mandy
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Old Feb 20th 2007, 8:28 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by Scrawni 2 View Post
about 70-80% today. I have just watched a program on Sky 3, 'Australias most deadly' and had the spider etc which I must admit, I don't miss one bit! It is nice to go out in the evening and not get bitten to death.

I just wanna make up my mind, deep down i think I reall want to go how do I make my son feel the same way? And then, how do I tell my dear old mum that we are off again, it nearly finished her last time?

Any advice? How did your family take the news that you are heading back?

Mandy
Um, haven't told them They are in Australia for 8 weeks at the mo and we only made these decisions 2 weeks ago so I haven't had a chance to speak to them.

My mum will be devastated - her only grandchildren will be going to Oz. However, I think part of the reason I've stayed put for 3 years is because of the grnadparents thing. My dad has egged us on all along to go back - he reckons we should never have come back in the first place. Now it's come to the crunch, I realise that I can't stay only to pacify my mother. I need to think about the future for all of us. So, not looking forward to telling her.

How old is your son? (I know you've mentioned this before in the thread but I've forgotten).
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 4:22 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

He's nearly 12. He didn't want to go last time and I did mention it casually a few weeks back and welled up and didn't want to talk about it. He liked oz and but he did miss the family, especially his sister. He has realised tho that she isn't around much thesedays as she spends alot of time at her boyfriends.

I know he will say 'no way' but if only I could get across our reasons why hopefully he might come round.
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 4:26 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by Scrawni 2 View Post
He's nearly 12. He didn't want to go last time and I did mention it casually a few weeks back and welled up and didn't want to talk about it. He liked oz and but he did miss the family, especially his sister. He has realised tho that she isn't around much thesedays as she spends alot of time at her boyfriends.

I know he will say 'no way' but if only I could get across our reasons why hopefully he might come round.
he is same age as grace mate. we could always get them together on MSN. i have done that in the past with another member on here and worked a treat!! grace is on board now so maybe she could work her magic
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 4:40 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Hiddenpaw

I'm currently about 80% at the moment.

OH and I have had some really positive chats about returning since I have started posted on these threads.

Kyle will be 10 this time and my youngest is 6, he won't be 7 until the end of the year.

I think the age thing is a huge factor and if we are going to return, I don't want to leave it too much longer purely because if we went back in the next 12 months at least he would be at school with my youngest. I would hate to return and for him to be having to go into senior school for the first time.

I think that would crucify me yet alone him!!!!

I know my parents would have just said to me "this is the way it is like it or lump it" do you think we are too soft even though we are trying to do what's best for them?

Michelle
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 4:44 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by theyoungs View Post
Hiddenpaw

I'm currently about 80% at the moment.

OH and I have had some really positive chats about returning since I have started posted on these threads.

Kyle will be 10 this time and my youngest is 6, he won't be 7 until the end of the year.

I think the age thing is a huge factor and if we are going to return, I don't want to leave it too much longer purely because if we went back in the next 12 months at least he would be at school with my youngest. I would hate to return and for him to be having to go into senior school for the first time.

I think that would crucify me yet alone him!!!!

I know my parents would have just said to me "this is the way it is like it or lump it" do you think we are too soft even though we are trying to do what's best for them?

Michelle
if i only have one piece of advice, its to do it while they are younger. older they get mate, harder it is FOR SURE!!!!
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 5:01 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

I know, that clock is ticking!!!! and there is nothing we can do to stop it

No pressure

Michelle
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Old Feb 21st 2007, 6:03 pm
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Pressure, what pressure Well my daughter is still thinking about coming out to travel with her boyfriend so maybe that will entice my youngest.

I would say I'm almost there but we really need to discuss with our lad before making the decision. I know that in our parents day it would be, 'your coming and that's that', but I don't want to do that. I moved when I was 10 and didn't even know about it until about a week before the move

Your right tho, the clock is ticking .....
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Old Feb 22nd 2007, 12:49 am
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

I think everyone of you who is contemplating the ping pong route is very brave with all of your decisions, first to go to Aus then leave then to consider returning.

I have been through five years here mainly based on the 'stick it out - it will get better' theory. My homesickness has ebbed and flowed but never gone away. I wish I had returned even to regret it or change my mind.

I have read every bit of general advice about making the best of it, doing the right thing about not unsettling the children again, shut up or go home, not being a wimp etc etc.

What it comes down to, as has been said here, is a personal level of choice and circumstances. Not one person is going to be able to put themselves in that exact level of pain and unhappiness going through the process. Or even adaquately explain themselves on here. I love the level of support I get from this site when I have been feeling bad and wondering why the hell I have put myself through some of the things I have. I understand the worry around illness. I have put off having a much needed hysterectomy, regardless of how simple or easy it may be because I would have been alone here with just the hubby and kids. Hopefully once I get my next job sorted out I can think about it again in a year.

I personally think I was being a wimp staying and not owning up to the fact I needed very much to get 'home' and sort out my options and make a more committed decision.

I applaud those that return and those that may ping pong - I know none of these decisions is easy and coming here and telling us is even braver.

Cheers and Thanks
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Old Feb 26th 2007, 7:04 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Just an update, my daughter is definately up for the move Now, we just need to convince her boyfriend. If they go then I'm sure my son will be happier with the move.

Mandy
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