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Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Old Feb 17th 2007, 1:26 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

It's true you just don't know what's around the corner.

We moved to oz, house sale fell through in the uk so we were paying mortgage here and rental costs in oz at the same time. There were other factors which I have gone into in previous threads so wont elaborate now.

Anyhow, hindsight is a wonderful thing and looking back we could have made different choices that might have helped us in our new life. I'm not bitter, I now have the knowledge and understanding that will hopefully make our transition better if we decide to uproot again.

People are very quick to judge but unless you have all the fact you can get things very wrong. However, as they say in oz, 'no worries mate'
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Old Feb 17th 2007, 3:04 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by stevensfamily View Post
my true family is under my roof and it is only them that really matter
you have really struck a cord with me there and i am really trying to think along these lines. gosh you really sound like my husband now. you are so right, thanks
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Old Feb 17th 2007, 3:33 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by Scrawni 2 View Post
Hello all,

Hope some of your remember me, we went to Cairns and ended up coming home after 9mths. Anyhow we have been back for nearly 2 years and I can't believe how time has flown.

For all of you that don't know our story, we emigrated, our 17 daughter just validated her visa and then came back, so it was my husband and I and our 10 year old son. I was homesick and missed our daughter terribly. On top of that our housesale fell through so we decided to come home.

I just loved being back amongst family and friends and life is good. I work full time and love my job. My husband 'dunroamin' went back to work for the same company he had left. At first he found things very hard, he didn't really want to come home, he fitted into the ozzie lifestyle just fine.

The last 2 years have been hard, it did put a strain on our relationship for a while but we worked through it and have come out smiling and stronger than ever. I loved oz but never wanted to return. My how things change. I am thinking about returning but I haven't made up my mind. I have even thought of moving somewhere completely different in the uk. Why, well because if we don't do it now we never will.

We saw family on a regular basis when we first returned but now we only see then once a month really. Friend have their own lives so finding the time to catch up is difficult. My daughter has her own life, she rarely at home these days and is looking to move out with her boyfriend.

So, there you have it, shall I be a ping pong pom?? Life is good, food is cheap, weather hasn't been bad at all and we are slowly getting back to where we were before we left. So why am I thinking about returning?

Is it that you don't truly feel settled anywhere after moving and experiencing another way of life?

Who knows, but we have until 2009 to decide!

Mandy

What if you get homesick again and end up moving back to the UK again, can you afford to constantly be pingponging between OZ and the UK, its your money, as long as you can afford it and it won't send you under the poverty line then go for it.
l think some people who immigrate to OZ go home too soon, when they should have given it atleast 2 years, and end up regreting moving back.

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Old Feb 17th 2007, 3:53 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by Lord Pom Percy View Post
What if you get homesick again and end up moving back to the UK again, can you afford to constantly be pingponging between OZ and the UK, its your money, as long as you can afford it and it won't send you under the poverty line then go for it.
l think some people who immigrate to OZ go home too soon, when they should have given it atleast 2 years, and end up regreting moving back.
i regret moving back so soon but i really had little choice. i hd never been so ill and just couldnt face it. the timing simply couldnt have been bloody worse. going to write it off and start again (but with far far far less dosh )
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Old Feb 17th 2007, 8:17 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

You are right, we should have stayed longer but you cant help circumstances beyond your control. We all know what we could have done, should have done etc but we all realise that.

As it stand financially, we still had our house back in the uk so in the grand scheme of things we didn't actually loose that much. If we go now will still have the same amount of money to take with us as last time. I know that's not the case for everyone.

Whilst out in oz, we got talking to some fella who had moved out there, his wife was unhappy after 6mths so the moved back to the uk, they then moved back to oz, then spain, then uk then they finally settle back in Oz AND, they sold all their furniture every time, now that's scary!
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Old Feb 17th 2007, 8:23 pm
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Oh, and it takes big balls to admit you have made a mistake.
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Old Feb 17th 2007, 9:15 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

From my experience (and I am the daughter of a ping pom UK/oz and an american mum born in the Uk) once you have moved it is so hard to settle. I have lived in the middle east and then 18 years in south east asia and came back to england 8 years ago with 4 kids and 5 suitcases and no money cos my family were here and i yearned for england... sadly gran died and my 2 sisters moved... one to kansas and one back to Oz!!!!So much for family (sorry gran!). Those of us in these circumstances tend to end up scattered over the globe but wow! that is enriching and the love and friendship of true friends and family is not limited by geography.

I think you have to say to yourself: there are no mistakes, just experiences. all experiences are good, even the bad ones as they make us (and our kids) who we are. Dont beat yourself up for "mistakes", they are not any such thing, just brave decisions based on the circumstances you were faced with.

However life is for experiencing it, as we only, i guess, get one shot and if you feel corageous enough to try another expeirnce then go for it ....if that is what you want. If it doesnt work out... well, its only money but you will have had rich experiences that so many people can only dream of. Follow your heart and and listen to it. I hope all works out well for you whatever you decide. Indeed it will because whatever you decide to do is the right thing.
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 7:58 am
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Talking Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Hello Stevensfamily.

You are absolutely correct in what you say. When people ask me how long we were in Oz and I tell them, to be honest, I feel a little embarassed because as you said, 7 months is no time at all.

However, for me it felt like an eternity and the day before we were due to fly back I realised that I may be making a big mistake. But my eldest son was looking forward to going home, everything had been sorted, the rental re-let, the furniture had gone etc. etc.

I couldn't just pull the rug from underneath everybody and say "oh by the way guys I've changed my mind again, let's stay".

I really feel that perhaps it has took us to come back in order to learn a very valuable lesson. And, if we do decide to return, we will be going over having previous experience and with a determination to realise that at the first wobble (because I'm sure there will be some again) not to start on that slippery slope again.

I am very envious of people who have gone over and just got on with it and come on here and say it is the best thing since sliced bread. But I do realise that they have made it work.

Also, everybody's situation is an individual one.

Good luck to you and yours on your visa application and I wish you every success for your future in Oz.


Rooskie, good luck with the house sale mate, you deserve it

Looks like Scrawni2 is going to be the one hot on your heels

Michelle
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 8:04 am
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Hindsight is a wonderful thing

Michelle
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 9:01 am
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What about you, are you nearer making the decision?
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 9:28 am
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Unfortunately no.

OH said a couple of days ago that he was ready and let's go for it. However, we had friends come round last night who we havn't seen for a few months and he was saying how he hadn't quite made up his mind

I know how he feels though, we all do!!!!!

I'm sure this year will be the year whereby we do make the decision whether to go or stay.

In the meantime, we have booked a surprise holiday to Eurodisney for the kids at the end of March, so I'm really looking forward to that at the moment and making the most of it because if we do go back those kind of holidays will be out of the window!!

The enormity of it all can be quite overwhelming at times.

I reckon I'm probably about 65% to go at the moment, so there is a bit to go yet.

Having said that I think there will always be a little element of doubt purely because it is an unknown quantity again.

It looks like you're nearly there though mate

good on ya

Will it be the sunshine coast again and if so, whereabouts?

Michelle
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 10:05 am
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by theyoungs View Post
Hello Stevensfamily.

You are absolutely correct in what you say. When people ask me how long we were in Oz and I tell them, to be honest, I feel a little embarassed because as you said, 7 months is no time at all.

However, for me it felt like an eternity and the day before we were due to fly back I realised that I may be making a big mistake. But my eldest son was looking forward to going home, everything had been sorted, the rental re-let, the furniture had gone etc. etc.

I couldn't just pull the rug from underneath everybody and say "oh by the way guys I've changed my mind again, let's stay".

I really feel that perhaps it has took us to come back in order to learn a very valuable lesson. And, if we do decide to return, we will be going over having previous experience and with a determination to realise that at the first wobble (because I'm sure there will be some again) not to start on that slippery slope again.

I am very envious of people who have gone over and just got on with it and come on here and say it is the best thing since sliced bread. But I do realise that they have made it work.

Also, everybody's situation is an individual one.

Good luck to you and yours on your visa application and I wish you every success for your future in Oz.


Rooskie, good luck with the house sale mate, you deserve it

Looks like Scrawni2 is going to be the one hot on your heels

Michelle
Michelle,

I would like to thank you on behalf of everyone going through the visa process for your honesty on this thread. It is your valuable experience that others can learn from and understand that during their initial wobbles when settling in to their new home that these happen to everyone and to ride the storm and try to see it through. You have show that this is normal but the message you have given everyone is stay and give it chance.

Thank you on behalf of everyone,

Cheryl
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Old Feb 18th 2007, 5:50 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Thank you for your kind words Cheryl.

It is incredibly easy to judge people even though you havn't been in their situation. It is human nature to form an opinion whether it be right or wrong.

I am, normally, an incredibly strong person emotionally and the rock of our family unit. However, on this occasion it came all a bit too much to bear and it wasn't a sudden crash of emotions it is a slow erosion over a period of time.

But putting that aside, I can now look back and see very clearly where I/we went wrong and definitely learn from it.

The visa process is a long and arduous one and throughout I remained very focused and determined. However, when you are feeling as low as what I did at that time, the time that was spent obtaining the visa pales into insignificance.

But I know one thing, I/we have come out much stronger people from our experience and that can only be good.

I truly wish you all the best with your visa process and I look forward to reading about your updates.

Michelle

Last edited by theyoungs; Feb 18th 2007 at 5:53 pm.
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Old Feb 19th 2007, 6:37 pm
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Originally Posted by theyoungs View Post
To be honest I am scared more this time than I was the first time round, purely because the first time I was really excited and optimistic but after our previous experience I keep thinking what if I feel the same again.
I feel exactly the same and emotionally, I'm all over the place. When OH first sought a work transfer and got a positive response, I really was excited; when the guy in Oz then didn't call when he said he would, I was full of fear that it wouldn't happen; when he did call and wanted to get the transfer underway I burst into tears with shock and fear. Then we hit a stumbling block and I was worried again it wouldn't happen. Now we've overcome that and it's all happening and I'm all over the place. One minute I want them to come back and offer a really crap package so we have to turn it down, the next minute I'm dreading not being able to go. It's horrible! I just want to fast forward my life to the next phase.

I am scared for the same reasons as you Michelle - last time we just went for an adventure, we kept the house in the UK, no children, just off to have a good time for a couple of years. This time we've got 2 children in tow, have to sell the house and I'm terrified that I'm going to get there and think OMG, what have we done!

I think deep down I know I want to do it, but I keep losing focus of exactly why we are doing it. Sometimes I just sit here and wonder why on earth we are doing this all over again.
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Old Feb 19th 2007, 6:47 pm
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Default Re: Scrawni and her life Oz-UK

Originally Posted by stevensfamily View Post
I appologise but I think after going through the hell of getting a Visa, I do not understand only giving it a try for 7 months. It must take that long to sort out the basics such as places to live schooling etc. I think anyone who goes through the visa process must tell themselves to give it at least a couple of years before throwing the towel in because you cannot really experience a settled life until you have established a real life in your chosen location. April until November is far too short a time to judge your new life in any true fashion, the most stressful time settling in a new country is the first year or so as you have so much to discover and learn, I can say this from experience . I have been going through the visa process for over a year now and can guarantee that after this amount of time invested in going to Oz I would not make an assumtion that it is not for us until I have invested as much time at least in living there!!!!
Easy to say that, but everyone's circumstances are different. I'm sure no-one emigrates expecting to go back to Uk after 6 months, do they! If you're trying to manage family issues, financial issues, health issues, or whatever, then sometimes you need to make decisions that benefit the situation and the people involved, not just "battle on" because you think you have to stay there a certain amount of time.

I have absolutely no regrets about coming back when I did - it was the right thing for us to do, given the circumstances (came back after 18 months, at 6 months pregnant with 1st baby).
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