Wedding costs
Nov 16th 2006, 3:15 pm
#76
Homebody
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,181
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Jerseygirl
I have been told it's the same here too. Trouble is you're a bit of a pariah if you don't accept. As usual is all about $$$$'s not people or friendship.
I refuse to get involved. Why on earth would I want to attend the wedding of someone I have never even met?
And who actually enjoys weddings? (I mean the big OTT affairs requiring special outfits - hats!!
- formal receptions etc.)And when did it become acceptable to include registry details with the invitation??
Nov 16th 2006, 3:22 pm
#77
SUPER MODERATOR
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 88,040
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Elvira
I refuse to get involved. Why on earth would I want to attend the wedding of someone I have never even met?
And who actually enjoys weddings? (I mean the big OTT affairs requiring special outfits - hats!! - formal receptions etc.)
And when did it become acceptable to include registry details with the invitation??
And who actually enjoys weddings? (I mean the big OTT affairs requiring special outfits - hats!!
- formal receptions etc.)And when did it become acceptable to include registry details with the invitation??
If it's someone we know and like we go...if not we refuse.
I don't particularly enjoy weddings...unless it's someone close to me.
We give according to our relationship to the bride or groom...not to pay for their costs.
Nov 16th 2006, 3:35 pm
#78
BE Site Lead
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: MA, USA
Posts: 92,172
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by anabella
That's how they work in Spain too.. they are a bit of a business though. When you are invited to a wedding you have to make sure that you give enough in cash/present to cover for your meal and some more for the couple.. This means that the more people you invite the more money you get so people tend to invite everybody they know..
Weddings usally pay themselves..
Weddings usally pay themselves..
Nov 16th 2006, 3:36 pm
#79
BE Site Lead
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: MA, USA
Posts: 92,172
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Elvira
And who actually enjoys weddings? (I mean the big OTT affairs requiring special outfits - hats!! - formal receptions etc.)
And when did it become acceptable to include registry details with the invitation??
- formal receptions etc.)And when did it become acceptable to include registry details with the invitation??
well the registry thing ain't to bad, especially if they have been together for a while and have most household things...but we haven't gotten registry things, usually have a look to see what sort of things there after though and get something we think they would like that's a bit different.
Don't forget, that a lot of these stores have an after marriage deal where you can buy stuff on your registry for 10% discount...so that's probably why a lot of people do it...that and the freebies
Nov 16th 2006, 3:43 pm
#80
Homebody
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,181
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Bob
people wear hats?
well the registry thing ain't to bad, especially if they have been together for a while and have most household things...but we haven't gotten registry things, usually have a look to see what sort of things there after though and get something we think they would like that's a bit different.
Don't forget, that a lot of these stores have an after marriage deal where you can buy stuff on your registry for 10% discount...so that's probably why a lot of people do it...that and the freebies
well the registry thing ain't to bad, especially if they have been together for a while and have most household things...but we haven't gotten registry things, usually have a look to see what sort of things there after though and get something we think they would like that's a bit different.
Don't forget, that a lot of these stores have an after marriage deal where you can buy stuff on your registry for 10% discount...so that's probably why a lot of people do it...that and the freebies
It's not the registry I object to - but including the registry details WITH the invitation is ... not acceptable. Or at least that's what my mama told me
Nov 16th 2006, 3:57 pm
#81
Who?
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Stepford
Posts: 3,098
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Jerseygirl
If I remember correctly in England the bride and groom's friends and family are invited. Here it seems many of the parents' friends are invited too. We have been invited to weddings and we've never even met the bride or groom and haven't seen them since. Seems to be a competition...which family can get the most guests...perhaps it's a popularity contest. 
Nov 16th 2006, 3:58 pm
#82
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,415
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Ray
Chaperone and witness yup ..we could marry them in the pool
Nov 16th 2006, 3:59 pm
#83
Slight chance of Showers
Joined: May 2006
Location: Norfolk,UK ->Memphis,TN
Posts: 1,158
Re: Wedding costs
The whole wedding thing here is just another part of the Social climbing that everyone wants to do. Often people will invite co workers or bosses to their childrens weddings. It's also competative, like how some people are with christmas decorations, always keeping up with (or outdoing) the Jones's.
We were married in a small chapel in TN, about 80 guests. My wife and mother in law did the flowers themselves and they were very impressive, we had simple snack food for a short reception. We had to go to New York to get my wife her UK visa so this was our Honeymoon.
We were married in a small chapel in TN, about 80 guests. My wife and mother in law did the flowers themselves and they were very impressive, we had simple snack food for a short reception. We had to go to New York to get my wife her UK visa so this was our Honeymoon.
Nov 16th 2006, 4:00 pm
#84
Senior Moment
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,008
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by jumping doris
Before we moved here some of my work involved weddings and brides
Not all of the brides appeared to be rolling in it but thay still spent a fortune on their wedding and started planning it sometimes 2 years in advance to be able to have the date and venue they wanted. They obsessed over everything and were often a huge pain to work with, thinking nothing of phoning at 6am or my worst one.....2am on Sunday morning.
The honeymoons were often really expensive and I used to wonder if they really enjoyed them because they were so stressed by the time the wedding happened.
I dealt with them at the beginning of the whole thing and then right at the end. By the day before they were often spotty with all the stress and crying over the slightest thing.
But I miss taking their money
Not all of the brides appeared to be rolling in it but thay still spent a fortune on their wedding and started planning it sometimes 2 years in advance to be able to have the date and venue they wanted. They obsessed over everything and were often a huge pain to work with, thinking nothing of phoning at 6am or my worst one.....2am on Sunday morning.
The honeymoons were often really expensive and I used to wonder if they really enjoyed them because they were so stressed by the time the wedding happened.
I dealt with them at the beginning of the whole thing and then right at the end. By the day before they were often spotty with all the stress and crying over the slightest thing.
But I miss taking their money
Were you a wedding planner? I've dabbled in event planning - I always enjoyed the end result even though it turned me into a stress head during the process.
Nov 16th 2006, 4:01 pm
#85
Who?
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Stepford
Posts: 3,098
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Elvira
It's not the registry I object to - but including the registry details WITH the invitation is ... not acceptable. Or at least that's what my mama told me
)
Last edited by jumping doris; Nov 16th 2006 at 4:02 pm. Reason: spelling
Nov 16th 2006, 4:04 pm
#86
Who?
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Stepford
Posts: 3,098
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Sarah
Were you a wedding planner? I've dabbled in event planning - I always enjoyed the end result even though it turned me into a stress head during the process.
I did lots of other calligraphy commissions, the weddings were just a small part of my day but often the most stressful.
Nov 16th 2006, 4:04 pm
#87
Mr. Grumpy
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 3,100
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by jumping doris
Before we moved here some of my work involved weddings and brides
Not all of the brides appeared to be rolling in it but thay still spent a fortune on their wedding and started planning it sometimes 2 years in advance to be able to have the date and venue they wanted. They obsessed over everything and were often a huge pain to work with, thinking nothing of phoning at 6am or my worst one.....2am on Sunday morning.
The honeymoons were often really expensive and I used to wonder if they really enjoyed them because they were so stressed by the time the wedding happened.
I dealt with them at the beginning of the whole thing and then right at the end. By the day before they were often spotty with all the stress and crying over the slightest thing.
But I miss taking their money
Not all of the brides appeared to be rolling in it but thay still spent a fortune on their wedding and started planning it sometimes 2 years in advance to be able to have the date and venue they wanted. They obsessed over everything and were often a huge pain to work with, thinking nothing of phoning at 6am or my worst one.....2am on Sunday morning.
The honeymoons were often really expensive and I used to wonder if they really enjoyed them because they were so stressed by the time the wedding happened.
I dealt with them at the beginning of the whole thing and then right at the end. By the day before they were often spotty with all the stress and crying over the slightest thing.
But I miss taking their money
American women are much more psycho than english girls when it comes to weddings.
I think some part of their brain just switches off....
Nov 16th 2006, 4:05 pm
#88
Slight chance of Showers
Joined: May 2006
Location: Norfolk,UK ->Memphis,TN
Posts: 1,158
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by jumping doris
I did some work for a very famous wedding and they put the registry details in with the invitation. The couple are soooooo rich I am amazed they wanted gifts at all. (And I cannot tell you who they are because I had to sign a secrecy agreement and I just know they follow everything that goes on on BE )
)
Nov 16th 2006, 4:06 pm
#89
Who?
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Stepford
Posts: 3,098
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by BritGuyTN
American women are much more psycho than english girls when it comes to weddings.
I think some part of their brain just switches off....
I think some part of their brain just switches off....
Nov 16th 2006, 4:07 pm
#90
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 68,280
Re: Wedding costs
Originally Posted by Rete
And baptism as well.