Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Hello

Just wanted to ask this question and see how many people have found that life in Spain is what they hoped and longed for.

I've got a lovely idea of walking along in the sunshine most days, sitting in squares with locals (and expats of course) until all hours eating tapas and drinking wine, meeting great, outgoing, similar people and inviting the round for BBQ's and Sangria every other week. :-)

I was just curious as to whether these expectations are realistic.

Of course I know that there is all the boring stuff too, work, trips to supermarket, chores, paying bills etc - but hopefully thats all a lot nicer when the sun is eating down outside...

CC

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES, YES!

Living in the UK I was so angry. I believe in live & let live, I don't interfere with you & you don't interfere with me but that seems to go against British philosophy.

In Spain I'm totally relaxed & chilled out. I still work (in fact still have the same job with the same employer) but my home life really couldn't be any better :thumbup:

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

It can be like that and indeed for us it is. Difficult to explain but, after a while "living the dream" can become tedious.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Well, yes and no

I am enjoying life in Spain, but really the biggest difference is the language and culture. And most "expats" speak English most of the time so even that wont be so different. Most of the time I am still working and doing the things I'd be doing in any country.

What you wrote sounds like a holiday to me or maybe a retirement

And yes the weather is better in Spain, but it isnt without its inconveniences i.e. cold in the winter and too hot for 2 months in the summer (it makes everything difficult, ok when you are on holiday when you have nothing to do!). But the odd day when we go for an excursion at the weekend is priceless, its those times you appreciate.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Its funny you say that about it sounding like a hoilday or retirement. As it's neither but I'm just looking for a full life and people in UK tend to have that opinion also - that those kind of things are 'just for holiday' etc. why shouldn't bbq's and socialising and fun stuff not be part of 'the norm' , after all we only live once ;)

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

And yes the weather is better in Spain, but it isnt without its inconveniences i.e. cold in the winter and too hot for 2 months in the summer (it makes everything difficult, ok when you are on holiday when you have nothing to do!). But the odd day when we go for an excursion at the weekend is priceless, its those times you appreciate.[/QUOTE]

I appreciate your point re the hot summers, I'm sure that coudl be hard getting used to. maybe we'll use that time to back to the UK summer which will be nice and cool!

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I'm reporting this post to the mods, as I believe you may have stolen my identity.......

You and me both, you and me both....

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

It's great to hear all your positive experiences.
More welcome!! :-)

Also if anyone has tips on meeting freinds, i.e are there social website to arrange activities etc?

Thanks
CC

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Life out here is precisely what you make it. We are retired, and are loving it. I have my garden and fruit trees, an dthey take up a lot of our time. The weather is a whole lot better than the UK for us. There actually IS sunny weather in Spain, instead of the persistant greyness of the UK that used to depress me so badly.

There aren't many tasks that aren't made more pleasant by sunshine, - try and imagine a cafe culture on an average day in the UK!

Nowhere is perfect. I repeat NOWHERE IS PERFECT. The trick is to find a place that you really like, and then strive to iron out as many of the niggles as you can.

Me, I love it here because I am no longer feeling as tho I am in a hamster wheel, running and running every day just to stand still. Shall I start building that wall, or shall I go out for the day and cruise the garden centres.....Ooooo, decisions decisions. We did just that today, stocking up on pots and saucers from one of our customary viveros, then it was back home via the local bar where we eat lunch twice a week and collect their used coffee grounds, which we tip on the compost. Tomorrow, if the sun shines I shall take an hour out to go lie in the sun and relax just that little bit more.

The heat doesn't bother me nearly so much, but Jan doesn't like it when it gets really hot. There are tricks to minimise the effect of the sun, all they require is a bit of intelligence, and maybe the investment in a mobile a/c unit for when it all gets just too much.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Very little danger of getting overheated under the grey skies. ;)

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I am the biggest advocate of Spain, I love it, but I can't see what BBQs, socialising and "fun stuff" have to do with Spain? Why is that any different to any other country?

In London we frequently went to BBQs or to meet up with friends at the weekend. And my friends in London still do. While here we go out to restaurants with friends/family on a Sunday or meet up at people's homes. Pretty much the same.

Although imo the food is way better in Spain, but that is my opinion and from being on this forum a long time I know most British expats prefer to eat British food anyway.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I'd say BBQs are relevant. Pick any Saturday from here to october, and I would bet good money that it will have great weather.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Maybe I've forgotten how bad the weather was in the UK :)

The good thing in Southern Spain is that more often or not it isnt raining, so you can plan your weekend and its very rare you have to cancel.

I used to play in a tennis league in London, it was a nightmare, you'd arrange a time, book a court, be looking out your window all morning, and then in the end the match got cancelled!

I still maintain though, that unless you are retired, the weather isnt a good reason to move countries. There has to be something about the country that you can relate to and be part of.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I cherish the fact that we get a reliable summer in Spain. I used to keep track of the weather to prove all the people wrong who said I exaggerated the paucity of sunshine in the UK where we were. Perfect summer days with no cloud were a rarity, and it was interesting to notice that as soon as there was half an hour's sunshine, everyone would start saying 'Isn't it a lovely day?' It was as tho they were actually incapable of remembering anything except for the sunshine, and edited out all the grey bits.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Hey you two beat me to it.

I did a very stressful job in the UK so our trips over to our house the first 2 years that we owned it were very important. OH took early retirement so I had to as well even though I really did not want to and we came here and renovated our town house. We worked quite slowly on the renovation because we did not want to spend all of our time working, this meant that we had lots of days out and about having fun. The people in our town are wonderful and include us in everything. Many hours are spent with our friends celebrating fiestas and we have also joined in by being in lots of the processions.

Never in our wildest dreams did we expect to be accepted and included in the way that we have been so we have been very pleasantly surprised.

Rosemary

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Yeah, we were very pleasantly surprised at how friendly and helpful our new neighbours were. Within a short time (weeks, not months) we had talked to more people here than we ever did in the uk in the street where we lived for three years.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

and you were comenting on the pervy thread.:confused:

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Hi

No Spain is not what I thought it would be like; how many people can really predict the future? But what i did was to give it a year, trying absolutely everything sensible, and then I went and sat on a mountain top to think about whether it was working for me.

As I am still here I have to say that I consider the life here to be better than a life I would have in the UK. Nothing is perfect; life IS what you make it, and I have made an interesting life here.

But I would say it doesn´t suit everyone, but it takes courage to admit you got it wrong and return - I always said that if I didn´t like it, I would not go back to where I lived, but would move "onwards and upwards"

Davexf

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

its not an attack julian.its a joke.lucky bastard.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Probably becasue you don't live in Scotland. :) We had one bbq whole last year and that was really making an effort even though it wasn't a great day. We looked at a few otions, inlcuding Australia and California but for the next 4/5 years, Spain is a good option in that we can have those things, not too far from the UK and manage a business that operates in the UK and go back and forth. And we love Spain - got married in Frigiliana last September..

We used to live in Brighton and it was a bit better weather down there, like London and people generally more actve and outgoing than up here. So that's what we want, but even moreso if we can and better weather. It's just knowing you can plan things, havng friends round, trips to the park, beach etc that appeals to me.

I'm with you on the food!!:thumbup:

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Without going into stuff that is too personal for you can you tell us what is different from what you expected.

Going to the mountain top to think sounds excellent. People return for many different reasons and it is not always what they want in their hearts but is necessary because of practicalities. I do not think that it is because they have got it wrong but that the experience was not what they thought it would be, or they could not make ends meet or they get sick of the sun or maybe ill heath. Trying something and returning is better than dreaming of trying and then not endeavouring to make changes in your life.

Rosemary

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

The lifestyle that you will have in Spain will be very different from 95% of posters on this board. First off, the majority on here are retired. So, right away their objectives are different.

Second, of those that aren't retired, they are working, often not very succesfully. Nothing against them, but the lack of fluent Spanish, coupled with the dearth of of job opportunities makes Spain a very difficult place for Brits moving here.

Not being stuck in a full time job in Spain means that you almost have an ideal scenario where you can enjoy actually enjoy that vacation lifestyle that so many hope for when they move here.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Hi

The costa de la luz is a lot more Spanish than I realised; yes I knew it was "more Spanish than the costa del sol" but not the percentage. I knew I would have to learn Spanish (I was already doing a course) but I did not realise just how slow progress would be. Yes I should have put in more effort, but hindsight is easy. After eight years I can get by, but am by no means fluent.

The there is the age thing; how can one predict what one will be like eight years down the line? I had not come across Spanish Bureaucracy - WOW and double WOW, was that an eye opener.

Living with a well and septic tank, with electricy but no telephone, (and in the early days no internet). Lots of small "niggles" none on their own amount to anything, but just make life "different" for me, but unbearable for others.

But one has to take life as it comes; I have had to accept many things - but I look at the overall life, but defintely not to everyone´s taste .

Davexf

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

We moved from Hong Kong to a place in the campo in Spain and after 13 years in HK and having to adjust was just about as big a shock as when we left Scotland to go to HK.... but you live with it, enjoy the good bits and try to be humourous about the bad bits, otherwise there is no place you can be happy.

It's not where you are, it's what you make of it.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Ref social life - no-one seems to have mentioned socialising with Spanish people; our thoughts on that one are that there will be some you can invite or who will invite you but integration is a whole different thing which may (or may not) ever seriously be possible
Ref language - DO NOT ever underestimate the impact of not being able to communicate fluidly (as distinct from fluently - I mean the speed of the thought process before the mouth works!)
Ref bbqs & weather - yip it's the % chance of a decent day that makes a world of difference!
other than that, over to you bil:

Nowhere is perfect. I repeat NOWHERE IS PERFECT. The trick is to find a place that you really like, and then strive to iron out as many of the niggles as you can.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

how very well put!

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Please miss.....I did....we only socialise with Spanish people.

Rosemary

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I imagine sitting with the locals will be difficult at first, if at all. I come from a different background, but I would say don't expect locals to come and show a real interest in you, especially if you don't have a real fluency in the language, as most ex-pats don't.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

thing is,i have been lucky all my life to live in very nice places,then 12 years ago,i moved to fuengirola,to some its a kind of paradise,people from coventry love it,they can see the sea,to me its just a dump,cant wait to move back to north devon,over the 12 years i have seen thousands of brits come and go,all so keen and loving it when they move here,6 months later,skint,dream has gone,i have no sympathy any more as they wouldn't listen anyway,i have a 'bouncers' clicker that counts numbers,i click when i see a brit bar change hand in the fuengirola area when walking my dogs,in about 5 years i am at 952,thats just what i have seen,move here to retire,sure,to work,no!!

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

No Spain is not what I expected.....its a whole lot better!
As retired expats our experience will be different though from those with a young family who still have to work.
We now don't go on holiday, as simply going out for the day always has the feel of a holiday about it, go one way and it's beautiful mountains and lakes, go the other and the Med is only an hours drive away.
On top of that there is so much history and culture right here on home ground, all summer long there are ferias and fiestas....one long party if that's what you want!
Actually living here though is very different from how you see it on holiday, ordinary life takes over just as it would anywhere in the world.
Spain isn't perfect, but if you pick your location well for your needs it comes close!

We are fortunate that we have Spanish family here down on the coast and also Spanish friends of many years standing.
This probably makes us less inclined to mix with other expats, we do have a few friends amongst that group but mostly our friends are Spanish as are our neighbours, they have all totally accepted us and include us in all that goes on, we on our part include them also...they were at our BBQ on Sunday.

The one thing that we were not prepared for in our move was the difficulty understanding Andaluz.....its not at all like the Spanish we learned and when spoken at full speed leaves you shaking your head in bewilderment, but we do live out in el-campo in a small hamlet so that's to be expected, it's only an hours drive from the coast, but it's a world away from the Costa del Sol. :D

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I know exactly what you mean, it's thirty years since we first visited Fuengirola, back then it was a very small town and you could clearly identify what had been the original fishing village.
Back then we loved the place, but over the years we watched it grow and change...not for the better! Now it's grown into a large town with no style and totally lacking in a plan, I know some still enjoy the place for holidays, but we now don't go near it unless we really have to do.

Like you we have seen Brits arrive full of their dream of running a bar, sometimes they lasted a few months, but sometimes it was only three weeks before their dreams were shattered and they had to return to where they came from.
I often wonder why it is so many think they can move here to run a bar but imagine they will be able to spend all day on the beach as if on holiday, they just wouldn't think that way back in the UK....would they?

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I’m somewhat between the gushers and the odd complainer. We live pretty normally after many years in Spain and would only go back under extreme circumstances, but a lot of people do go back, on top of the obvious ‘publicans’ who should never have come in the first place, although I know several that have made it in Spain, but they’re in a small minority.

We found that the extreme enthusiasm at first wore off pretty quickly, were troubled by boredom for a while and then settled down to living normally, much like the UK but with sunshine and the sense of adventure when living abroad. And we’re both still working, though at a leisurely, self employed pace.

We lead active social lives, mostly among expats, but with Spanish friends too, and I can honestly say that I don’t find Spanish people any different to British people, leaving aside the fiestas and other minor stuff dictated by a wonderful climate.

I admire the few expats who try and integrate fully, but the reality for the great majority is that you don’t have to try that hard – most Spanish people are quite happy having you in their country as long as you behave properly, (and contribute financially), and some knowledge of the language is appreciated.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Where could you get to in one hours drive when you lived in the Uk? There must be many places of beauty, interest, culture etc.
I understand all the points being made about weather etc..etc. but for me you cannot beat the UK for diversity.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I think that post is a tad unfair. Sure Brits that head to tourist resorts get stuck in a rut but we don't all fall into that category. Those who want to be successful will be, those that want to bum around will.

Life is a bit different for me because I commute to a north sea oil platform each month, sure the 2 weeks of work is a drain, but then I get 3 weeks of the vacation lifestyle you talk of :thumbsup:

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

A couple we met about a year ago did, they bought out in a little village, not too far from the coast, they got what they signed up for at the time........Spanish neighbours, fiestas, country walks and so on.

They were not British, they were Danish, I met them their English was really good and their Spanish was exceptional, judging by other expats that I have met in Spain. and they were very well settled, and had lived there for a lot of years.

The hubby became ill, some kidney problem or other, Their neighbours in the village (clump of houses really) rallied round and helped with doctors appointments etc, as the wife did not drive, and is seemed very unlikely that the hubby would be able to drive again.

The woman who shouldered most of the burden, told us she was happy to do it "mientras".
The friend we were with asked what "mientras" meant, and she said "mientras they make arrangements to go home".

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I think your post is a bit unfair too, not everyone who wants to be sucessful will be, life gets in the way, illness, family problems, etc.

Dont forget Spanish business fail too, so to put that all Brits who put their mind to it will come out winning, is pie in the sky.

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

I agree with you as well, agree with some of the points made,but also can't understand why it's not possible to do that in UK. We were out on the coast, walking beaches all day yesterday, having a cafe lunch(outside in the sun even), and currently planning where to go today. It's a great day, we'll be out all day, in some stunning scenery, pub lunch on the coast, and knowing Álora area quite well, I know which I prefer. Tomorrow will be the same, we have our ex neighbours over from Portugal (they've had enough, selling up) we'll take them to the St David's coast, their favourite area. Agree with Fuengirola, plus I'd include a whole more of CDS in that, there are lot nicer places than that part of Spain.
Chapeau to the people that speak Spanish, I do a bit of it myself, but I'm not sure why people think it makes them better than the rest, by telling us they only have Spanish friends, they don't mix with Brits. Is it some form of elitism? Should we be impressed? True there are some awful Brits living there, but there must be just one or two that are OK. A mix of the two maybe?

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Wow I am impressed, your French is good too, and dont forget soccer rat.:rofl:

Re: Are you living the life you moved for?
 

Ain't that the truth, oh that it were that easy! Just wanting to be successful is in no way a guarantee of success. I can't imagine anyone starting a business not wanting to be successful! :confused: