XTreme

.....such a Mecca for complete and utter morons?

Sure, we all knew idiots when we were in Britain....but nowhere near as many as we've come across here in two years.

Just this morning we were in a Brit bar and a woman went to the counter and said "Can you book me a place on the London trip you're organising?" "Great price....only a Euro".
The owner looked bewildered and said "What are you talking about....there's no trip to London".
The woman looked quite indignant and said "What do you call that then.....you've got a sign saying London Pride €1.
The owner said...."That's not a holiday.....it's a bloody bottled beer".

Christ....can it get any worse? Probably!

busters mum

Someone told me they only go to the english butcher because his meat is better than the spanish stuff !! silly c*w it's still spanish meat cos i know the bloke !!

Lionda

A chap we know has bought into a bar on the coast, he moved over last December and when we saw him in May we asked him how his Spanish was coming along, he said - and these were his exact words, "Oh I haven't bothered, you only need to know 4 words of Spanish, two of those are wrong and you don't need the other two"

XTreme

I was talking to one guy in a bar and he kept looking around and saying "Where's that bloody por favor gone".
I thought I'd misheard him so I said nothing.
Then a minute or so later he says "The por favor in this place is the laziest one I've come across".
So I said "What do you mean....you've lost me".
At that moment the waiter enters the room so he shouts out....."There he is.....Por favor! Por favor!"

busters mum

por b*****d !

Mitzyboy

Trust me ...... theres some real morons back here too ...... I'm meeting more and more of them all the time

Pam Sarky

I nearly fell over laughing reading your post That is the funniest thing I have heard in a long time

leighbloke

You do tend to find like minded folk gather together - like a sort of herding instinct!

Lionda

Rather like on here do you mean

But then we are all the sane ones - aren't we

Mercedes

Its why I don't live in an expat community anymore, I thought I would be going out and buying a machine gun and doing the Spanish a favour if I stayed there. I remember going to a petrol station in Fuengirola and the sign said in Spanish to pay in the shop. It didn't take Enstein to work out if the petrol wasn't coming out to look around for any possible signs to why. This English guy started swearing to them to switch it on. I told him there was a sign and he replied. Well I don't f-ing speak Spanish do I.....and also meeting other Brits who won't do business with Spics either or eat their foreign muck etc......nope.....I moved into a Spanish community and saved buying a truck load of bullets.... In fact meeting some of the Brits around, I can actually understand why so many foreigners don't like us as a Nation as some of the ambastardors for it, don't give us good PR.....thankfully none of the Spanish have ever thought I was English...probably been out of the country too long and been around other nationalities and cultures for nearly 20 years that it has rubbed off on me.

XTreme

What amazes me is the people who supposedly want to live inland in a traditional Spanish community to experience "Real Spain".
Then they complain cos there's not a supermarket round the corner, that nobody speaks English, and all you can get is Spanish food!

The truth of the matter is they want and need to be on The Costas.........but they can't afford it. So they end up coming here....and bring their problems with them.
Rural places like this then get stuck with hordes of whingers and complainers who are incapable of integrating and/or learning the language.
When they ask me what they need to say to get something in a shop I just tell them to say this...."soy un cabron de Inglaterra y quiero comprar........"
The Spanish always know when they I've referred somebody!

Mercedes

I don't know I met a few of them in Australia, and they speak English there and if you read some of the reasons why people are going back to UK, you see many don't seem to know how to intergrate there or even make friends. Of course, there is nothing wrong with them.....its the whole nation of Australia's fault or fill in the blanks for whatever country...., Some people just need to look in the mirror and realise the problem is actually them and they should stay in UK.

I remember a couple who had brought a very popular spanish tapas restuarant. I used to go there when it first open since they were from my home area to give them some moral support. The food was crap, they were rude about the customers whilst they were in the actually place, didn't know how to make a decent cup of coffee and even when someone kindly told them, to help. They were rude about her. 6 months later they went back to UK, broke, and moaning they had been ripped off by the Spanish. The fact that their son, who was a crap chef and they were very tight on their portions, neither of them had run a restaurant before, of course didn't come into play. They left slagging off the Spanish.

featherbum

i love you thats the funniest thing ever!!!!

featherbum

[QUOTE=Mercedes;5261874]I don't know I met a few of them in Australia, and they speak English there and if you read some of the reasons why people are going back to UK, you see many don't seem to know how to intergrate there or even make friends. Of course, there is nothing wrong with them.....its the whole nation of Australia's fault or fill in the blanks for whatever country...., Some people just need to look in the mirror and realise the problem is actually them and they should stay in UK.

such a great point!

cherie

Yes, it will.