Blue Cat

that's a great idea! Bangle pretend you are gay

BangleMan

Didnt you get the home video you asked me to send you ?

BangleMan

Many a poster on here wants me to be, but Im not giving in to the likes of Admon and Insellafen or TGFKASE!!

Blue Cat

use it as a temporary ruse

BangleMan

dont you start with your perverted thoughts BC !

Blue Cat

it will stop her thinking of delusions of grandeur and a fake life here in the UAE

commander

I remember mate as I was going through a pretty tough time getting any type of contact with my daughter, so I think my response was something along the lines of 'tell the money grabbing cow to piss off' totally unforgivable given I didn't know anything about your circumstances.

I'm just a bitter and twisted victim of being a single father.

Anyway back to you, you raise a very good point that needs careful considering; that being the 'preceived' lifestyle that people assume we lead here. You will show her all the good spots (her G hopefully) and cram as much into her visit as possible, being a good host.

Then she goes to her family and the odd comments begin to appear about how BM is living the high rolling life whilst we struggle on the recession hit UK. He sends us good money but given he spends 6quid on a pint, I want more money.


Either that or she genuinely wants to give it a shot and reunite the clan

Bring her over and stay in sharjah.

BangleMan

I remember you saying about that....Did you get things sorted ? I hope so, as despite what some people on here said yesterday on MH's 'Bad Mother' thread (which I purposely didnt get involved in) for me personally, being apart from my kids is the hardest thing I will ever do.

I am sure there are many fathers who are only too happy to be off hand from their kids once their marriage ends, but Im proud to say that I am not one of them, and there is not a moment in the day when I dont wish I was with them.

I spend my time here counting the days down to the next trip home or their next visit, and when I leave them for the airport, I literally have to stop the car around the corner, and physically wretch out of the car door, as the pain in my heart / stomach is so severe at leaving them, knowing it will be weeks before I will see them again

What worries me like you say is that the ex will come over and think this is where I want to be and look on it as some kind of lack of love for my kids, cos Im leading (apparently) such a great life, and I will have that thrown at me at some point, or used to try and manipulate more money (maybe I am doing her a disservice ?)

To this day, I think I should have done what 90% of people do, and have stayed for the sake of the kids, but the relationship was dead, and at the time I thought it was unfair on my ex and on the boys.....in hind sight, maybe I should have just plodded on, as I never imagined for one minute at the time, that I would end up 3500 miles away from them

outtatouch

relationships do die but can be revitalized! in the end, family/relationships is what it's all about. i hope for your sake that it does work out and you don't have to suffer being away from your kids anymore. life is too short.

commander

what a lovely post, seriously. I went through the same, actually feeling sick before i went to collect my daughter then crying at the emptiness after i handed her back over.

Your boys are blessed to have a father that they can look up to, to teach them what it means to be a man.

Inselaffen

that won't take much effort

Blue Cat

Commander and Bangleman, you two have made me cry, what amazing Father's you both are

BangleMan

its only you who turn me on Inse, so without you here its so tough

BangleMan

I have every sympathy with you and know what you mean as have been there many times.

Nothing irritates me more than men who dont give a toss about their kids, or women who class all 'fathers' as wantaways, who wont support their kids, or who think that just because we didnt give birth to them, that our bond is any less strong or important

I was the first person to see them when they were born, I got up every single night with my wife when they were young and needed feeding, and was with them everywhere they went, supporting them in anything they did.

Thats what I miss most....the daily interaction, just listening to their voices, arguing with one another, the noise, bedlam etc, plus the football training nights, football weekends watching them play, and going over West Ham with them to name but a few things.

I love the fact now that they are at an age where they arent just children now, but my best friends, and can be cheeky back to their Dad, try and wind me up by being sarcastic etc, and best of all that despite the fact the eldest one is an inch taller than me now(which he is so pleased with, at 6ft 4") he doesnt think twice in giving me a man hug when we see one another or leave one another...

I think it was LH who mentioned yesterday that a woman was more likely to try and save their kids than a man in a fire.....what utter rubbish, I would push every ****er out of the way to get to them, no matter who they were

admon

'kin hell.. bangle, commander, get a room..

I'm getting a lump in my throat from all this..