bramblebush

One of my biggest reasons for being unsure about returning to England is personal safety for myself and my family.

We are so up and down, we just can't decide what we want.
One day we are going to try and settle and stay then the next day we are desperate to go back to the UK.

Aug 2005 we arrived in France so excited about our new adventure, hating England and believing everything in the papers, yes we got caught up in all the negative stuff.

Feb/Mar 07 we had our first spell of homesickness and admitted to ourselves and to each other that this didn't have to be forever and that it would be ok to return.

April/May 07 the weather was spring like and we decided that we would be mad to give it all up.

Nov/Dec 07 Christmas is looming, we miss family and want to go home.

Christmas came and went we made the most of it and did have a lovely time, decided again that we should stick it out.

Early January we decide we can't stick it out and want to go home.

Then it all gets too complicated to explain, we change from one day to the next.

My main concern is personal safety for all of us, I feel safe here in deepest rural France and to be honest I am scared to live in England.

Can anyone relate to this feeling, I tell myself that it is irrational fear but it still stands in my way.

ex_exile

Not sure that its irrational, I would not live in London again, it gets worse everytime I visit and it is certainly no place to bring up children.

When I left England 7 years ago I guess I imagined I would be back at some point but subsequent trips to visit family have changed my mind, theres always a high profile murder or tube bombing or whatever going on, and I'd rather not have to deal with it.

Just my 2c

bramblebush

Yes, I agree that London and other big cities can be dangerous, however we would be looking at herts, suffolk, norfolk.
In comparison Paris is just as bad as London.

Fleaflyfloflum

Ask yourself this. Why would living in deepest rural England be any different to living in deepest rural France? I cant see the difference myself. If you enjoy the isolation of that kind of rural life, it still exists in UK. You just need to look harder i guess.
Strangely enough I feel the total opposite. Living in solitude or a long way from other people makes me feel unsafe. I think its a fear of no help at hand if anything goes wrong

Lionda

Why not book a holiday in a cottage in England, any part that takes your fancy, just to get the feeling of being in England again.

You always hear the bad parts of any country - look for good news reports

bramblebush

Really good suggestion, however, we went back to England for 5 days at the beginning of Jan and we loved it, nothing terrible happened to us and we commented on how friendly and polite the people were.

We also have a trip booked for mid Feb for 5 days and again I'm sure that we will love it there.

My family and friends are all in England and have never experienced any terrible danger.

I just still have that fear.

We are a lost cause I'm sure of it, we just cannot be helped

jojosan

I really do not want to be rude, so please do not take this the wrong way! But - you are in France! Just over the water from England! As you have said, you can go back so easily (5 days in Jan and Feb), why on earth are you so worried!! Either, that very short distance is enough that you can visit family easily (as you are) or they can visit you - in about an hour's flight.

And did you really expect hordes of rampaging savages covered in woad when you got off the plane? You only went there in 2005 - not the dark ages.

If I was living somewhere I felt so comfortable, that was hardly any distance from my family and whom I could (clearly) so easily visit, I'd be happy as the proverbial...

As least you're not 12,000 miles from civilisation in a dry dust bowl, surrounded by bloody chicken shops......

Lionda

Draw up a list of 'fors' and 'against'

bramblebush

I appreciate the fact that I am close to England, however my fears and worries are just as valid as anyone else's.

jojosan

Of course they are and I wasn't saying anything else.

My point was that you yourself have said you've visited recently and are going again, and all was fine. Also that your friends and family are fine in UK. Therefore, although you may have the fears and worries; they are unfounded by your own admission.

Live in any major city in the world and it may be a different story - however deepest, darkest rural UK will be no different from deepest, darkest rural France. Perhaps those are your main choices?? It's not that you are scared of England itself, it's the uncertainty and upheaval of moving your family again? Just my opinion from what you've said.

Lionda

You may have hit the nail on the head there! Could that be the reason BB? The fear that if you moved back to the UK you may find you have made a mistake and if your life and home in France is good you may not be able to get that back again. I can understand your fears but life is all about taking chances, none of us know what is round the corner.

pommybird

Hi BB - still in turmoil I see - you poor thing.

The whole 'safer' issue for me is such a non starter. As others have said - yes rural France is safer than say inner city Manchester and vice versa rural UK with Paris BUT my personal opinion is that you cannot make a decision based on crime statistics anyway- for me the decision was simple - I was unhappy in Australia - I wanted to live back in the UK because I love the UK -end of - no amount of statistics on crime, education etc etc would change that.

There is no 'better' place to live - there's good and bad everywhere - it what's important to you as a family that matters and what makes you happy in life.

Hope you come to a decision soon - I know you've been up and down for so long now.

bramblebush

Good point

Yes, we are worried about making a mistake, that is one of the things that myself and my husband have said but we hadn't realised that maybe it is the main thing that is holding us back

Thank you

jonfrank123

With all due respect

I can't relate to that feeling for several reasons.

I would be going back from a large Canadian city, with much the same problems as london.

In the last 2 years, out of all my family, friends and, business associates in the UK, not one has mentioned being affected by serious crime. Bear in mind I speak to the UK all day on the phone for business and speak to family and friends almost every day. I also go back to visit 4 times a year.

I grew up in London, lived there all my life it's my home and get sick of people slagging it off all the time. It's a city of 10 million, of course there will be crime, it isn't utopia. For it's size and importance it's incredibly safe.

I realise that the UK media blow everything out of all proportion, the risk of crossing the road is far greater than being killed by a terrorist.

That said, it's a tough decision

Best of luck with it

Jonathan

Howard1944

A few years ago a Canadian moved his family to the Falklands, he was so concerned about living near the U.S and a Nuclear Attack, three weeks later the British invaded.

Poop happens.