mikek1

I am at at a loss to understand how the l/l accumulated a loan of 250k. Surely the pawnbroker would only lend knowing that the items pawned were worth significantly more than the amount loaned. This makes me wonder how the l/l accumulated such a large amount (say 500k to allow pawnbroker make sufficient insurance against non payment) over a relatively short period.
My gut feeling is you have been well and truly shafted with blatant lies and deceit. The prospect that she has two children is not unexpected, however the coverup is totally outrageous.

Run!

mikek1

My Filipino wife of 25 years has commented that that yes the Philippines can be a dangerous place especially for foreigners who let their emotions ( you get the gist) rule their head.😉

Philosophical 11

Greetings!

Thanks for your many responses which made interesting reading. Thought I would clear up one misunderstanding. I stated earlier that the total amount from pawned jewelry must be amount 250k. I also mentioned that although I have no idea the total value of her jewelry, it is unlikely to be anywhere near 250k. All I can see are receipts and I believe she is re-pawning to pay off interest and the final redemption amount. So it could be her jewelry is being pawned 2 or 3 times over.

Now I have had time to mull over these rumours, I am inclined to feel that they are false and malicious. Two reasons:

I knew her on fb for about one year prior to meeting her here. We got serious after about 6 months. In that last 6 months I studied her FB account and timelines looking for evidence that she could be married, or have a bf, or have children. I found plenty of references to her family here and photos etc, but no suggestion of children. I would find it very odd that she spent 4 yrs in Kuwait without mentioning children.

Since knowing her, we have good expat friends with Filipina g/fs. Some have children from a previous relationship. She admires our culture whereby a foreigner will take on another persons children as part of a relationship. I am told that a Filipino (pinoy) would be unlikely to take on another mans children. I have told her on more than one occasion that if she had children, then they would be part of the package. I may not be the father, but I would try to be a damn good dad. She has therefore had plenty of opportunity to admit to children if she had them without being afraid.

I think its a malicious rumour because I do know she has enemies or green eyed monsters that do not like her. But....heres a theory if the rumours are true.

The father has got wind that she is engaged to a foreigner and maybe marry in a few months. She has been helping support her two children whilst in Kuwait and back here. Father now gets greedy. Wants a big payoff and threatens to pitch up to the house with the two children in tow unless he gets the money. Rather than risking our relationship, she coughs up the money. Hence the pawning.

I will mention the rumours to her when I feel the time is right. The rumours are coming from her close friends and I just know that if I reveal the sources there will be recriminations. It has happened before.

Regards

mikemike

'' I am told that a Filipino (pinoy) would be unlikely to take on another mans children. ''

100% untrue

Think about it

1/ Not many marry unless it is a mass wedding at city hall, they still have children

2/ None can get a divorce they still have children

3// They do for the most part have a partner, and they still have children from another partner.

I see several examples of the above where I am.

Nobody likes to be taken in, nobody likes to believe that a relatively poorly educated third world person is going to get one over on them.

The Philippines is littered with foreigners who have been way too well educated and smart to ever allow that to happen.

Just think it through some more

Stokkevn

I have seen it from the other side. I know of a few women who have moved on from previous to new partner/husband, but their kids from the previous relationship do tend to be shipped off to either her or her previous partner's parents.

Gazza-d

If the tismis is to believed most of our baragay are hoping in and out of bed with each other, I know most of my brother in laws are trying their best. Children tend to be more family property in the Philippines which seems odd to us westerners.

Millhouse

I guess the question is ... does he care. 250k over about 3 years (amount is actually less when you consider that some of the porning has been repaid) isn’t that expensive really for a bit of peace and quiet - it would be a lot more if they lived with him.

Philosophical 11

Greetings.

It appears that I could be the step father of two boys. She is upset, angry at how this has been leaked. I need to deal with this once she has calmed down and I get the full story.

Regards

Millhouse

Wow, what news - does the story actually matter?

I trust that you will do the right thing ... once you have exhausted all the other options of course.

Good luck with the next steps.

Stokkevn

Well that landed with a loud bang.

I am a step father to three boys ( from my ex-wife in Norway, all of whom I knew about on second date ), step grand father to 7 and a step great grandfather to 2. I love them all dearly. But I am sure that if she had not trusted me enough to tell me that she had kids and I found out via the rumour machine I would not have hung around for 20 years nor would we still be friends.

I think someone needs to take someone else away for a few days to neutral ground ( no family or friends or phones for that matter ) for a serious chat about the past and the future expectations, you seem to have laid your past and expectations on the line, it is about time she did it as well. And then a couple of days apart to reflect on what each has said.

Dorothy

Sorry... You have to wait until she calms down? If I were you I would be spitting! The two of you have been together for a few years now and she's been lying (by omission at least) to you this entire time. If she's willing to lie about her own children what else is she lying about? Is there a husband somewhere as well?

Wake up and smell the coffee here! You seem like a good man, but from an outsider perspective you're being played.

BEVS

I tend to agree. I think he is a lovely man who deserves far far better.

I also agree that there needs to be some serious talk on neutral ground .

No trust and a pile of fibs = no real future.

I'm sorry to read that she has played your kind heart in this way.

Catchafire

I gave a involuntary gasp when I read this. Holy s%$t mate. How can a mum hide her kids from you? And what effect does it have on those kids? How can you ever trust her? Its messed up on so many different levels.

Get out of Dodge mate!

Simon1983

You've given your lady every opportunity to be honest with you but she has lied and mistreated you every chance she has had.

You need to wake up mate! She will never change. You will never be able to trust her. Do you really want to be in a relationship like that?

Good luck mate. I really hope you can remove yourself from this toxic situation. There is a whole world out there. No reason why you have to stay where you are and put up with this bull****!

Bealinehx

WOW! Another victim of the good old Pinay two step!
For me that is a deal breaker.