lardyl

1 - unless they a playing England, been to ODIs, rugby tests, T20s, football, etc all to support NZ and the odd ones to support England
2 - most social invitations come with clubs or organisations and I've never turned them down if we could make it. but some are pretty boring and sometimes you wonder why some kiwis invite you....but hey that's the same the world over
3 - done that, been invited to be club captain, organised, coached, supported, captained teams, had great support and given lots of time. great place to meet people and good to bond with those who have been through the same things. but mainly met with ex-pats or first generation kiwis/their kids. suppose it's the code involved?
4. haha - like saying I'll never smack my kids/my kids will always behave better than that *before* you have them. some issues in life are just too important or personal to not compare them with back in the UK/wherever. Sometimes you have to share these things with fellow ex-Pats, usually with the office door closed at work. That is the only way to remain sane sometimes!

Snap Shot

Matt, you've just made chortle to myself sitting here ! Thanks. BTW, I must post that datastick to you.

Cornishkiwi

This is exactly where I was coming from! I didn't mean I don't compare (of course I do or did) but I did try to do it quietly and definitely didn't go about loudly telling everyone how much better things were in the UK.

Another point that seems to be causing some discussion is the accepting all social invitations. I don't do this now, but when we had just arrived in the country and were trying to make new friends (we didn't know anybody) this was our way of doing it. Even if you didn't like someone that much they might introduce you to someone you do like. It worked for us.

It's really interesting to read how everyone does it so differently.

BEVS

*sigh*

Was it in your own mind then , even though you didn't say it because why else would you raise it?
It isn't often in the mind of many that arrive here.

You all know my input to this.

"Give over" is my input . We already did this many times already. It is just so tired TBH

Try again .

"My attitude" as me as a person is that I am an OK person. I am me & do my very level best at all times as me who will always be me ,no matter what or where.
I don't need someone else to make me feel OK about who I am, where I come from, who I am now or whether or not I should or should not be accepted by anyone. I don't need a list of what I should or should not be doing of. I am just me. Love me. Hate me. Like me. If you don't need , like, love me then I don't really need you in my life.

No-one but no-one validates who I am or my worth but me.

I love where I came from and what that has made me. I loved my parents and their choices. They were not from where I was born. I just love what they did for me and I will always stand up for that and who I am from the years I spent in my place of birth. It made me who I am today & someone who could move themselves from everything they knew and loved. to be in NZ.

I am English born and bred. I would not and have not hot housed trying to get to know people. That is just so shallow and false IMO.

Being in NZ is no different to being anywhere else, even your own home town. If you are meant to find like minded friends, you will. If not, you will not.

It won't be all about them or where they live. It won't be all about you or where you came from either.


*sigh*.



(Catchafire?)

TommyLuck

BEVS, some of us are new to this forum and it's hardly unlikely that this sort of question wont come up regularly from new people. Those of us who are just about to start, or have just started life in New Zealand are keen to hear what other people think and theres only so much scouring of the forum you can do to find out "answers" from previous posts of the like.

This isn't really the way to go about welcoming new people to the forum, let alone encouraging us to contribute on an ongoing basis.

Bo-Jangles

I think the point is well made that there is no recipe for success and other than not going out of your way to be troublesome or a dick then you should just live your life the way you want to.

According to the OP my attitude totally sucks - no surprises there.

We all click or gel with people on many different levels, dependng on interests and circumstances. If you're desperate you can spend a lot of time effort and money to cultivate and nurture some friendships, turning up for the opening of envelopes, or you can just be yourself and take what naturally comes your way.

I'm among people for at least eight hours of every weekday. People who I often would prefer not to give the time of day, so am quite happy to be by myself out of working time. I really don't need to surround myself with an entourage and quite often find it an inconvenience to be invited places when I have plenty of things to do at home.

However, if I were at home all day, every day I would certainly have to make more of an effort to put myself out there.

BEVS

Hey. Your view and you are entitled to it.

However, you do need to take the opening post & it's content in context when making such comments.

The OP isn't starting out.

TommyLuck

Surely this is exactly the type of forum that the same old questions get repeated on a regular basis?

Is it worth shipping my car over?
Living costs
What's good about NZ?
What's bad about NZ?
What have you done to ensure you settle?

Etc, etc ...

hazeandsteve

Hi Bevs. I've not really bothered with this thread, but now that there's a bit of niggling going on, should I chip in and stir a little bit?

dannigirl

Hang on let me get my.....

TommyLuck

BEVS

G'won then Mr Mighty Muscles Discus Thrower

hazeandsteve

You'll find a few people (mainly in Papamoa), that want that little bit of colonialism to still exist. Surrounded by natives, they sit and drink Pimms and glorify the beauty of Blighty, and long for it's return in these far off lands.
Refusing to mingle, they then bemoan the fact that said natives haven't wholeheartedly surrendered their children as cheap labour to mow the stripes into their lawns.
Any approach by said natives, be it an invitation to a ritual imbibement or to join on the field to hit coconuts with sticks, is then seen as mere rebellion, and will be rejected with much upturning of chin.
Said colonists will look mockingly at the natives as they ineptly run like like headless chickens (later to be eaten raw) around some field which is no Wembley, ain't that a bloody fact, chasing a ball which won't bloody bounce properly.
Every other blue moon, a new arrival from the motherland will arrive with a different point of view. In the manner of a missionary, the newcomer will attempt to integrate with the natives. This must be mocked, cut short, and casticised with all haste lest the natives believe all colonialists are actually not a bunch of anal inbreds.
Fear not, there is a world wide web of horror stricken folk willing to support the colonialists. many in the new world, some looking warily to follow the brave few who led the way. they MUST be reassured that England, glorious England is alive and well on the other side of the world.





Or just come, join in, and enjoy.

(Can't be arsed to proof read, so excuse grammar and spelling mistakes.)
Thanks Bevs. XXX

TommyLuck

Ha, ha!!

That was an entertaining read.

phyns

Thanks, I just pissed myself laughing