Returning to the UK - don't
May 11th 2009, 3:07 am
#32
Thinking about it
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Mid-West
Posts: 9,435
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Isn't Portugal basically a third world country ??
May 11th 2009, 4:44 am
#33
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
[QUOTE=ukintexas;7559750]
Sorry to hear about your Dh How scary that must have been.
How's he doing? I'm sure there was a lot of rehab to go through after something so serious.
one debilitating illness for either Dh or I and we'd loose it all, and we have excellent health cover compared to most here. But for most of my life here we worried the kids might break a leg and bankrupt us. QUOTE]
My hubby had a brain hemorrhage last year and the medical bills for that stand at about $250,000, with our contribution to pay being approx $15,000 even though we pay nearly $600 a month for coverage! It is truly a scary thing in the US and I, like you, freak myself out all the time about the "what if" scenarios regarding medical bills! However, his initial diagnosis and treatment were excellent and I'm not so sure we would have been afforded the same on the NHS (he was in a helicopter going to a specialist brain unit within 30 mins of going ot the ER). That takes us back to the good and bad points of all things I suppose.
My hubby had a brain hemorrhage last year and the medical bills for that stand at about $250,000, with our contribution to pay being approx $15,000 even though we pay nearly $600 a month for coverage! It is truly a scary thing in the US and I, like you, freak myself out all the time about the "what if" scenarios regarding medical bills! However, his initial diagnosis and treatment were excellent and I'm not so sure we would have been afforded the same on the NHS (he was in a helicopter going to a specialist brain unit within 30 mins of going ot the ER). That takes us back to the good and bad points of all things I suppose.
How's he doing? I'm sure there was a lot of rehab to go through after something so serious.
May 11th 2009, 8:30 am
#34
Weirdo Latin Dude
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Hotter than hell
Posts: 2,545
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
abroad. I focussed on the health care and services in Portugal because we lived in a rural area where most people were self-sufficient farmers. One thing that Brits think is that there is a welfare service in the UK. There once was, but no longer.
Fortunately we were fit enough not to need a doctor except in a couple of emergencies - hornet stings and a cut hand. The service was prompt, seen by our GP based at the local hospital and then passed on for treatment straight away.
What was good about Portugal was the quality of food. We grew our own organic food and so did most of our neighbours. Everything was fresh and usually seasonal.
There was a level of respect. Young people, even small children were treated as individuals and with complete respect. No-one would be rude enough to designate anyone an OP as they do here. The weather was difficult extremely hot in the summer and very cold in winter, but even in winter by midday the sun would be out.
There was a strong sense of community and belonging. Even though we were foreigners in a non-English speaking part of the country we were drawn into what everyone did. We got drawn into their weddings, funerals and confirmations. It was great being able to teach them what we knew and they made use of our skills which was exactly what we would have wished. We were the only people in our area with a telephone - so they popped across and asked us to phone for them. We were the only people with a car, so we got to take them anywhere they couldn't walk to. In return they taught us everything we needed to know about how to look after our olives and how to make wine and brandy.
The cities were wonderfully clean. The restaurants clean. Our water came from an underground spring. It wasn't full of antibiotics, hormones and chemicals. People were not suspicious of one another; they didn't spend a lot of their time worrying about 'celebrities' or involved in non-real 'reality programmes', though most were keen on TV.
In short, if I could sell my house I would go back tomorrow. I have made myself homesick just talking about this.
Fortunately we were fit enough not to need a doctor except in a couple of emergencies - hornet stings and a cut hand. The service was prompt, seen by our GP based at the local hospital and then passed on for treatment straight away.
What was good about Portugal was the quality of food. We grew our own organic food and so did most of our neighbours. Everything was fresh and usually seasonal.
There was a level of respect. Young people, even small children were treated as individuals and with complete respect. No-one would be rude enough to designate anyone an OP as they do here. The weather was difficult extremely hot in the summer and very cold in winter, but even in winter by midday the sun would be out.
There was a strong sense of community and belonging. Even though we were foreigners in a non-English speaking part of the country we were drawn into what everyone did. We got drawn into their weddings, funerals and confirmations. It was great being able to teach them what we knew and they made use of our skills which was exactly what we would have wished. We were the only people in our area with a telephone - so they popped across and asked us to phone for them. We were the only people with a car, so we got to take them anywhere they couldn't walk to. In return they taught us everything we needed to know about how to look after our olives and how to make wine and brandy.
The cities were wonderfully clean. The restaurants clean. Our water came from an underground spring. It wasn't full of antibiotics, hormones and chemicals. People were not suspicious of one another; they didn't spend a lot of their time worrying about 'celebrities' or involved in non-real 'reality programmes', though most were keen on TV.
In short, if I could sell my house I would go back tomorrow. I have made myself homesick just talking about this.
Apart from grilled sardines, fried sardines, toasted sardines, boiled sardines, smoked sardines and oven ready sardines the food is not particuarly good.
Given that its a latin country I would expect the level of individual respect to be quite high but this is changing.
Lebanon has sunny days too in winter but that doesn`t make it a great place to live.
The level of rural community that you speak of is available everywhere whether somebody is in the UK or Portugal.
hehehehe Portugal clean and with clean cities.............they must have cleaned it up especially for you
May 11th 2009, 8:31 am
#35
Weirdo Latin Dude
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Hotter than hell
Posts: 2,545
May 11th 2009, 8:34 am
#36
Weirdo Latin Dude
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Hotter than hell
Posts: 2,545
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
I
Many people find that living abroad involves learning a new language and sad to say a lot of Brits can't. That is insurmountable. If you want a British lifestyle and don't want to join in what the locals have to offer by all means come back. But beware, depending on how long you have been away, things have'nt half changed in the last ten years.
Many people find that living abroad involves learning a new language and sad to say a lot of Brits can't. That is insurmountable. If you want a British lifestyle and don't want to join in what the locals have to offer by all means come back. But beware, depending on how long you have been away, things have'nt half changed in the last ten years.
May 11th 2009, 9:03 am
#37
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Canberra
Posts: 8,378
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Well I am sorry to hear that you dont like UK - I guess the solution for you would be to leave in the same way that people on here are usually told that if you dont like the place you live in then nick off.
I guess I didnt see the Britain you are describing just last month when I was there. I was gobsmacked at the quality and price of food especially in the pubs. My parents live in an area well served by a huge range, most of which are well cheaper than the equivalent here in Aus unless you fancy club dining which we dont, particularly. I do agree that Gauchos was right up there in the price stakes (or should that be steaks) but we have a local steak house which isnt far behind and the quality is not as good either. Thank heavens my son who has emigrated back again didnt bat an eyelid about paying - he has a far better income than I do!
The community activities continued to blow me away - there was a lot going on including poetry by the river, Shakespeare coming to English Heritage places, lots of village events lined up. I was ticked off because there were so many things that I would have done but didnt have the time to do or they were just outside my visit.
My parents are elderly but as far as I can see are very well served by both the NHS and support services as are my elderly aunt and uncle. Specially nice is the neighbourhood support they get because I, their only child, live on the other side of the world. My aunt was the recipient of ground breaking surgery at the local hospital for which she has been grateful in the extreme given a poor initial prognosis. I am anxious about what will happen if one or other need a nursing home but the same was true for my mother in law who had to fork out $300k for her very mediocre place in rural Victoria.
I guess there would be no one on here thinking of going home who still had the rose coloureds on, we know there is crime, we know there is a total no hoper government (but you will probably have an election and boot yours unlike our no hopers who seem to have the population in thrall for a few more years yet), we know that there are immigrants (loads of them here too, including some of the loudest whingers about migrants!), we know that schools have SATS, Ofsted and GCSEs which stress the kids - we have a far less rigorous education system and whether it is better or not is a matter for conjecture.
So, with all that knowledge that we have, for many of us the decision to return is far more ephemeral - it is where we "belong", where we can walk down the street and know our heritage, warts and all. It is absolutely grand to be able to live in a house 400 years old and know the human endeavour which built such structures and left their marks upon them. To see buildings over 1000 years old still resplendent and functional. To wander the ever changing countryside and marvel in the burst of colour as each season changes (I'd go back just for the daffs and the cowslips), to soak up the spirit of Christmas (seriously lacking in Australia), to walk on grass that gives under your feet and is greeeeeeeeeeeen, blindingly gobsmackingly green, to jump in puddles and enjoy long balmy evenings outside (yes, you do get them, we had a couple of weeks of them on last year's visit)
So, as I said, sorry you dont like it and thanks for telling us your tale of woe. I hope you can find somewhere that you like to live the rest of your days in too just like some of us will when/if we go home.
I guess I didnt see the Britain you are describing just last month when I was there. I was gobsmacked at the quality and price of food especially in the pubs. My parents live in an area well served by a huge range, most of which are well cheaper than the equivalent here in Aus unless you fancy club dining which we dont, particularly. I do agree that Gauchos was right up there in the price stakes (or should that be steaks) but we have a local steak house which isnt far behind and the quality is not as good either. Thank heavens my son who has emigrated back again didnt bat an eyelid about paying - he has a far better income than I do!
The community activities continued to blow me away - there was a lot going on including poetry by the river, Shakespeare coming to English Heritage places, lots of village events lined up. I was ticked off because there were so many things that I would have done but didnt have the time to do or they were just outside my visit.
My parents are elderly but as far as I can see are very well served by both the NHS and support services as are my elderly aunt and uncle. Specially nice is the neighbourhood support they get because I, their only child, live on the other side of the world. My aunt was the recipient of ground breaking surgery at the local hospital for which she has been grateful in the extreme given a poor initial prognosis. I am anxious about what will happen if one or other need a nursing home but the same was true for my mother in law who had to fork out $300k for her very mediocre place in rural Victoria.
I guess there would be no one on here thinking of going home who still had the rose coloureds on, we know there is crime, we know there is a total no hoper government (but you will probably have an election and boot yours unlike our no hopers who seem to have the population in thrall for a few more years yet), we know that there are immigrants (loads of them here too, including some of the loudest whingers about migrants!), we know that schools have SATS, Ofsted and GCSEs which stress the kids - we have a far less rigorous education system and whether it is better or not is a matter for conjecture.
So, with all that knowledge that we have, for many of us the decision to return is far more ephemeral - it is where we "belong", where we can walk down the street and know our heritage, warts and all. It is absolutely grand to be able to live in a house 400 years old and know the human endeavour which built such structures and left their marks upon them. To see buildings over 1000 years old still resplendent and functional. To wander the ever changing countryside and marvel in the burst of colour as each season changes (I'd go back just for the daffs and the cowslips), to soak up the spirit of Christmas (seriously lacking in Australia), to walk on grass that gives under your feet and is greeeeeeeeeeeen, blindingly gobsmackingly green, to jump in puddles and enjoy long balmy evenings outside (yes, you do get them, we had a couple of weeks of them on last year's visit)
So, as I said, sorry you dont like it and thanks for telling us your tale of woe. I hope you can find somewhere that you like to live the rest of your days in too just like some of us will when/if we go home.
May 11th 2009, 9:04 am
#38
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: Beerwah, SE QLD hinterland
Posts: 229
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Welcome to 'BE' Gaeller
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
But beware, depending on how long you have been away, things have'nt half changed in the last ten years.
I just want to say that Ive been away just over a year (not 10) and if it wasnt for the wife loving it so much here then we would be back home regardless of your opinion of the place...Personally my heart is back in good old Yorkshire, warts and all, and no amount of you telling me otherwise would change that
Cant wait to read some of your past experiences though....Again welcome to BE.
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
But beware, depending on how long you have been away, things have'nt half changed in the last ten years.
I just want to say that Ive been away just over a year (not 10) and if it wasnt for the wife loving it so much here then we would be back home regardless of your opinion of the place...Personally my heart is back in good old Yorkshire, warts and all, and no amount of you telling me otherwise would change that
Cant wait to read some of your past experiences though....Again welcome to BE.
May 11th 2009, 9:08 am
#39
Weirdo Latin Dude
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Hotter than hell
Posts: 2,545
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
I have enjoyed my life in US, but it isn't home, I worry for the future here, one debilitating illness for either Dh or I and we'd loose it all, and we have excellent health cover compared to most here. But for most of my life here we worried the kids might break a leg and bankrupt us. Medical bills are #1 cause of bankruptcy here.
Theres no safety net here to speak of, as flawed as you find the UK to us going home looks mighty good. to us, plus the pull of family as always. We want to care for our aged family too.
Theres no safety net here to speak of, as flawed as you find the UK to us going home looks mighty good. to us, plus the pull of family as always. We want to care for our aged family too.
Question is what sort of medical coverage does say a shelf stacker in a supermarket get? What type of coverage do immigrants and their families get and I´m talking here about immigrants from asia and latin america who would do menial employment and have no hope of landing a highly paid job with benefits?
May 11th 2009, 9:13 am
#40
I don't give a damn
Joined: Apr 2007
Location: In the arms of my family. Heaven...
Posts: 4,980
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Well - I am sorry! I thought this was a serious exchange of information. Yes my first post is negative because I honestly feels that way.
Anyone who thinks Britain is the place to come back to should do so, naturally.
I am just giving my point of view as a returnee.
I came back to the UK twice a year for two months for 9 years to look after my mother and mother-in-law. It was my pleasure and privilege to do so. My husband also travelled back. Unfortunately impressions of the UK gained under such circumstances were not really indicative of what life would be like on a permanent basis.
Had my mother and/or mother-in-law come to live with us they could have been cared for in our own home, with a dedicated carer 8 hours a day. Our friend whose husband needed special nursing care, received that on a daily basis from the local hospital. He was also taken to his hospital visits 3 times a week by ambulance. All free.
Added to which, we lived on one pension and payment for teaching English 3 hours per week.
My sister presently has to pay £16 per hour for a Council care worker - who actually only spends 10 minutes putting her cornflakes and milk in a bowl and making her a cup of tea.
The UK's provision for the elderly is appalling. Its education system is also comparatively poor.
Every ex-pat child loved going to school and learned well. This is absolutely the truth British parents were amazed at how well their children learned after years of problems in British schools.
As an ex NHS worker and present volunteer I am also shocked at the poor level of service now available. The NHS is in meltdown.
If education and health care is important I repeat - be very, very careful about returning here.
The final irony - sorry to be so long - I lived in Germany, Italy, Switzerland, Uganda, Egypt and India. I never needed an ID card. Now I am being told I need one in my country of birth and I will have to pay between £30 and £100 for the privilege.
Anyone who thinks Britain is the place to come back to should do so, naturally.
I am just giving my point of view as a returnee.
I came back to the UK twice a year for two months for 9 years to look after my mother and mother-in-law. It was my pleasure and privilege to do so. My husband also travelled back. Unfortunately impressions of the UK gained under such circumstances were not really indicative of what life would be like on a permanent basis.
Had my mother and/or mother-in-law come to live with us they could have been cared for in our own home, with a dedicated carer 8 hours a day. Our friend whose husband needed special nursing care, received that on a daily basis from the local hospital. He was also taken to his hospital visits 3 times a week by ambulance. All free.
Added to which, we lived on one pension and payment for teaching English 3 hours per week.
My sister presently has to pay £16 per hour for a Council care worker - who actually only spends 10 minutes putting her cornflakes and milk in a bowl and making her a cup of tea.
The UK's provision for the elderly is appalling. Its education system is also comparatively poor.
Every ex-pat child loved going to school and learned well. This is absolutely the truth British parents were amazed at how well their children learned after years of problems in British schools.
As an ex NHS worker and present volunteer I am also shocked at the poor level of service now available. The NHS is in meltdown.
If education and health care is important I repeat - be very, very careful about returning here.
The final irony - sorry to be so long - I lived in Germany, Italy, Switzerland, Uganda, Egypt and India. I never needed an ID card. Now I am being told I need one in my country of birth and I will have to pay between £30 and £100 for the privilege.
I have never read such a pile of cack in my life!
ID cards? I presume you must live near Manchester where they are TRIALING them. The rest of us are not required to have them.
NHS in meltdown??? Rubbish!! I nearly died from pnuemonia last year and the treatment and service i got in the NHS hospital was 5 star. Couldnt fault them. Last Thursday i went to my GP as my breathing is still bad. She referred me to the hospital to the cardiac clinic. I have my appointment tomorrow!! Thats 3 working days after my doc visit. Tell me anywhere you would get that quicker!
My father died 18mths ago aged 91. He had home care helpers in every day who were superb. Just because you have experienced problems does NOT mean the whole thing is in meltdown, it means you got a bad egg to help your parents and should have complained and rectified it.
Crap schools?? Yep sure there are crap schools as there is in every country, but i have 6 grandchildren. I am very impressed at how well the school age kids are doing. The 7yr old has mild special needs issues and is looked after brilliantly at her school. So much so, I was amazed when we returned to UK 4 weeks ago to discover how much she had come on since i was here last year, so something must be working!!
Dont come on here espousing the idea that the whole nation is a crock just because it doesnt suit YOUR lifestyle. For some of us its the best thing we could have done coming home.
So i say... Anyone wanting to come home...DO IT!! ...
stick that in your pipe and smoke it
May 11th 2009, 10:08 am
#41
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,872
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
I have never read such a pile of cack in my life!
ID cards? I presume you must live near Manchester where they are TRIALING them. The rest of us are not required to have them.
NHS in meltdown??? Rubbish!! I nearly died from pnuemonia last year and the treatment and service i got in the NHS hospital was 5 star. Couldnt fault them. Last Thursday i went to my GP as my breathing is still bad. She referred me to the hospital to the cardiac clinic. I have my appointment tomorrow!! Thats 3 working days after my doc visit. Tell me anywhere you would get that quicker!
My father died 18mths ago aged 91. He had home care helpers in every day who were superb. Just because you have experienced problems does NOT mean the whole thing is in meltdown, it means you got a bad egg to help your parents and should have complained and rectified it.
Crap schools?? Yep sure there are crap schools as there is in every country, but i have 6 grandchildren. I am very impressed at how well the school age kids are doing. The 7yr old has mild special needs issues and is looked after brilliantly at her school. So much so, I was amazed when we returned to UK 4 weeks ago to discover how much she had come on since i was here last year, so something must be working!!
Dont come on here espousing the idea that the whole nation is a crock just because it doesnt suit YOUR lifestyle. For some of us its the best thing we could have done coming home.
So i say... Anyone wanting to come home...DO IT!! ...
stick that in your pipe and smoke it
ID cards? I presume you must live near Manchester where they are TRIALING them. The rest of us are not required to have them.
NHS in meltdown??? Rubbish!! I nearly died from pnuemonia last year and the treatment and service i got in the NHS hospital was 5 star. Couldnt fault them. Last Thursday i went to my GP as my breathing is still bad. She referred me to the hospital to the cardiac clinic. I have my appointment tomorrow!! Thats 3 working days after my doc visit. Tell me anywhere you would get that quicker!
My father died 18mths ago aged 91. He had home care helpers in every day who were superb. Just because you have experienced problems does NOT mean the whole thing is in meltdown, it means you got a bad egg to help your parents and should have complained and rectified it.
Crap schools?? Yep sure there are crap schools as there is in every country, but i have 6 grandchildren. I am very impressed at how well the school age kids are doing. The 7yr old has mild special needs issues and is looked after brilliantly at her school. So much so, I was amazed when we returned to UK 4 weeks ago to discover how much she had come on since i was here last year, so something must be working!!
Dont come on here espousing the idea that the whole nation is a crock just because it doesnt suit YOUR lifestyle. For some of us its the best thing we could have done coming home.
So i say... Anyone wanting to come home...DO IT!! ...
stick that in your pipe and smoke it
As everyone knows,I love the place,but like I always say,I think it does depend alot where you come from/live!To the OP,If its that bad maybe consider heading back to Portugal?
May 11th 2009, 10:21 am
#42
Searching for contentment
Joined: Dec 2008
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 513
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
[QUOTE=Mummy in the foothills;7560085]
It was a year ago this week and I'd say he's probably back to 98% normality! We were very lucky - even though that sounds strange considering there was less than a 0.1% chance of the hemorrhage!!! Thanks for asking though.
May 11th 2009, 10:22 am
#43
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 12
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Mummy in the foothills - you have a serious dilemma and it should be replied to in all honesty.
The US has probably the best health care treatment you can get. However, that isn't much consolation if you can't afford it. Please assess your financial circumstances and work out a health plan.
As said they got the best of care with regard to brain haemorrhage and have a great success rate.
Contrast my experience. BH is rising in this country. My best friend in Scotland where I live died at age 52 last year.
My sister-in-law similarly. She did not lose consciousness but delays in finding a bed in any local hospital no doubt complicated the outcome. An hour after being admitted to hospital, she started to 'fit'. The consultant could not intervene to prevent this because the equipment he needed was locked in a cupboard and whoever had locked it had taken the key.
There was plenty of time between her first slight attack to stop further deterioration, but a series of errors led to the tragic outcome - she died 10 days later aged 52.
Crystal23 - I do not live in a crappy town in the UK. The above experiences took place in Scotland and in Manchester. I have also lived in Farnborough and N Wales. As an NHS employee myself and having worked, as I said in the same profession elsewhere, today's health service is appalling. I still work as a volunteer. Mine was not a "Darling Buds of May" existence in any way. May I suggest you look at the UK through rose tinted spectacles from a distance.
The reason our parents did not come to live in Portugal was because they had children and grandchildren in the UK. understandable that they chose not to make the change. Family ties are very important.
As I said we returned to take care of our parents because the provision in Hampshire and Manchester was poor - or certainly not of a standard we had come to think of as fitting for women who had worked all their lives, including war work. My mother particularly was a very fit women who looked after her health. She was determined to outlive her sisters who all died in their 90's - no drain on the NHS there I assure you. A few weeks after we celebrated my mother's 100th birthday, she died quietly in her sleep some time between 2.30 and 5 when my sister-in-law when to visit her to help give her her tea.
It was a Saturday. We were relieved that she had such a peaceful end. When Barbara telephoned her doctor to come out of course he was not on duty. The emergency service said they could not send anyone because the patient was dead. The police, coroner and funeral directors were informed. The police would not let anyone touch my mother until an investigation had been carried out "in the light of the Dr Shipman murders". The coroner refused to intervene because of that other than to note the time of day.
My mother's body remained where it was until Monday morning when I got in touch with her local MP to try and do something. He was as shocked as we were. TO LEAVE A CORPSE FROM SATURDAY TILL MONDAY IS AN ABOMINATION IN ANY CULTURE though I don't expect you will agree.
By lunchtime Monday the MP had negotiated with the police for my brother and I to attend a 'verbal postmortem' in order to speed up the removal of the body. It was 3 weeks before we eventually buried my mother.
I joined in this forum because I know what it is like to have a rosy view of this country when you have lived a way from it for a long time. The reality of 21st Century Britain is hard to accept when we have had such long and good traditions. I thought I might be able to impart some information on the very serious problems that are occurring here - if it falls on stony ground so be it. The hostility with which it has been received leads me to conclude that it is not love of country that prompts it but a deep suspicion that all is not well in the UK. In short, it is a defensive reaction on the part of people not willing to accept the truth.
I posted in the evening because I was taking care of a terminally ill patient with another friend. Voluntary work because there was no hospice care available and we felt he deserved more than the drug administration he would get in and out of hospital. I posted during my 'breaks'. Our friend is 94 years of age, fought for his country, worked in a dairy factory till the age of 70 and paid all dues to the Government on the promise of 'care' when too old to take care of himself. Like the example in Essex recently exposed on BBC his care consisted of 20 minutes a day; an Oxo cube in water for his 'hot meal'. As this is Scotland, his care - if you can call it that - was free. Friends have dispensed with this and help him on a daily basis because they feel such individuals deserve better treatment. I have to tell you that all his helpers are over retirement age themselves.
I must away to my bed after a long disturbed night. Please don't trouble to reply as I shall promptly leave this forum. I don't really know why people waste their time in this kind of exchange. I hope those who are genuinely concerned about what they may find in this country take my words as cautionary. When I was selling my house a British couple came to view (in Portugal) I asked why they weren't returning to the UK the reply was "because it has become a nasty little country". I was upset because we were leaving to care for our relatives, so we had no choice. The words have stayed with me ever since. It is becoming nastier.
We have road-rage, trolley rage and now computer rage. We brutalize small children, stab people because we think they have taken our place in a supermarket. People die in their own excrement and because they can't get a hospital bed inside an hour.
Come down from the clouds its you who are living in cloud cuckoo land. Incidentally Florence, Geneva and Bonn are not darling buds of may situations and can be compared to London, Manchester or Glasgow - except at the times I lived there it was a more respectful and dignified experience.
To the poster who considers returning because his father is in his 80's. I wonder if he would join you. If not, I commend you. He will certainly need your vigilance and care. In my own experience and that of my husband it was always what we decided to do when the time came, so we have no regrets at all. In fact you can learn a great deal about yourself when you have to be the support for your parents. I also always felt that because my parents cared for me when I was young and vulnerable, then it is only fitting to do the same for them when their time comes. You never lose anything by doing so.
Don't bother to post any replies. I find myself with better and more urgent things to do. Thank you very much though for your kind attention. I wish you all luck in whatever you decide to do.
The US has probably the best health care treatment you can get. However, that isn't much consolation if you can't afford it. Please assess your financial circumstances and work out a health plan.
As said they got the best of care with regard to brain haemorrhage and have a great success rate.
Contrast my experience. BH is rising in this country. My best friend in Scotland where I live died at age 52 last year.
My sister-in-law similarly. She did not lose consciousness but delays in finding a bed in any local hospital no doubt complicated the outcome. An hour after being admitted to hospital, she started to 'fit'. The consultant could not intervene to prevent this because the equipment he needed was locked in a cupboard and whoever had locked it had taken the key.
There was plenty of time between her first slight attack to stop further deterioration, but a series of errors led to the tragic outcome - she died 10 days later aged 52.
Crystal23 - I do not live in a crappy town in the UK. The above experiences took place in Scotland and in Manchester. I have also lived in Farnborough and N Wales. As an NHS employee myself and having worked, as I said in the same profession elsewhere, today's health service is appalling. I still work as a volunteer. Mine was not a "Darling Buds of May" existence in any way. May I suggest you look at the UK through rose tinted spectacles from a distance.
The reason our parents did not come to live in Portugal was because they had children and grandchildren in the UK. understandable that they chose not to make the change. Family ties are very important.
As I said we returned to take care of our parents because the provision in Hampshire and Manchester was poor - or certainly not of a standard we had come to think of as fitting for women who had worked all their lives, including war work. My mother particularly was a very fit women who looked after her health. She was determined to outlive her sisters who all died in their 90's - no drain on the NHS there I assure you. A few weeks after we celebrated my mother's 100th birthday, she died quietly in her sleep some time between 2.30 and 5 when my sister-in-law when to visit her to help give her her tea.
It was a Saturday. We were relieved that she had such a peaceful end. When Barbara telephoned her doctor to come out of course he was not on duty. The emergency service said they could not send anyone because the patient was dead. The police, coroner and funeral directors were informed. The police would not let anyone touch my mother until an investigation had been carried out "in the light of the Dr Shipman murders". The coroner refused to intervene because of that other than to note the time of day.
My mother's body remained where it was until Monday morning when I got in touch with her local MP to try and do something. He was as shocked as we were. TO LEAVE A CORPSE FROM SATURDAY TILL MONDAY IS AN ABOMINATION IN ANY CULTURE though I don't expect you will agree.
By lunchtime Monday the MP had negotiated with the police for my brother and I to attend a 'verbal postmortem' in order to speed up the removal of the body. It was 3 weeks before we eventually buried my mother.
I joined in this forum because I know what it is like to have a rosy view of this country when you have lived a way from it for a long time. The reality of 21st Century Britain is hard to accept when we have had such long and good traditions. I thought I might be able to impart some information on the very serious problems that are occurring here - if it falls on stony ground so be it. The hostility with which it has been received leads me to conclude that it is not love of country that prompts it but a deep suspicion that all is not well in the UK. In short, it is a defensive reaction on the part of people not willing to accept the truth.
I posted in the evening because I was taking care of a terminally ill patient with another friend. Voluntary work because there was no hospice care available and we felt he deserved more than the drug administration he would get in and out of hospital. I posted during my 'breaks'. Our friend is 94 years of age, fought for his country, worked in a dairy factory till the age of 70 and paid all dues to the Government on the promise of 'care' when too old to take care of himself. Like the example in Essex recently exposed on BBC his care consisted of 20 minutes a day; an Oxo cube in water for his 'hot meal'. As this is Scotland, his care - if you can call it that - was free. Friends have dispensed with this and help him on a daily basis because they feel such individuals deserve better treatment. I have to tell you that all his helpers are over retirement age themselves.
I must away to my bed after a long disturbed night. Please don't trouble to reply as I shall promptly leave this forum. I don't really know why people waste their time in this kind of exchange. I hope those who are genuinely concerned about what they may find in this country take my words as cautionary. When I was selling my house a British couple came to view (in Portugal) I asked why they weren't returning to the UK the reply was "because it has become a nasty little country". I was upset because we were leaving to care for our relatives, so we had no choice. The words have stayed with me ever since. It is becoming nastier.
We have road-rage, trolley rage and now computer rage. We brutalize small children, stab people because we think they have taken our place in a supermarket. People die in their own excrement and because they can't get a hospital bed inside an hour.
Come down from the clouds its you who are living in cloud cuckoo land. Incidentally Florence, Geneva and Bonn are not darling buds of may situations and can be compared to London, Manchester or Glasgow - except at the times I lived there it was a more respectful and dignified experience.
To the poster who considers returning because his father is in his 80's. I wonder if he would join you. If not, I commend you. He will certainly need your vigilance and care. In my own experience and that of my husband it was always what we decided to do when the time came, so we have no regrets at all. In fact you can learn a great deal about yourself when you have to be the support for your parents. I also always felt that because my parents cared for me when I was young and vulnerable, then it is only fitting to do the same for them when their time comes. You never lose anything by doing so.
Don't bother to post any replies. I find myself with better and more urgent things to do. Thank you very much though for your kind attention. I wish you all luck in whatever you decide to do.
May 11th 2009, 10:28 am
#44
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jul 2008
Location: My happy place
Posts: 3,043
Re: Returning to the UK - don't
Don't bother to post any replies. I find myself with better and more urgent things to do. Thank you very much though for your kind attention. I wish you all luck in whatever you decide to do.
May 11th 2009, 10:33 am
#45
Searching for contentment
Joined: Dec 2008
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 513
