Moving Back As a Single Parent
May 19th 2013, 6:31 am
#31
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 49
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Hey,
couldn't just read and run.
Nope, I have no experience of moving back from another country.....but I can tell you what life can be like as a single parent in the UK
I split from ex husband when my daughter was two. She is now 23!!
Over this time, support both financially and practically for lone parents has improved dramatically.
I started out having to leave our house and going into a homeless families hostel (no family for support). Everything was sold...house (I had no job so couldn't take over the mortgage and he made it clear he wasn't going to help out - at all) ....all the furniture got sold as I had nowhere to store it, and finally the car went (he took it-and it was my car!!).
After the hostel the council gave me a nice little flat, and after a few years an even nicer little house (still living in it now). After a few months of being unemployed, I worked as a childminder which because of support for working the govt topped up my low income and I managed very well. I received help to improve myself academically, so much so I gained a degree with the O.U. I then trained at a "traditional" uni as a registered nurse.
Life now? bloody brilliant
great job, decent income, good savings, nice home....great friends.
That's not to say life doesn't throw you the odd curve ball now and again...but that's life isn't it.
My message to you.....IT WILL ALL WORK OUT, IT WILL BE OK.
One step at a time. Get home, spend some time adjusting. Go to job centre, gingerbread and citizens advice to find out what help to get and where (things like getting your name down for a housing list etc) and of course getting your little one in at a local school.
Things will fall into place. One piece at a time.
pm me if you need any advice...I will help out if I can
Ty
couldn't just read and run.
Nope, I have no experience of moving back from another country.....but I can tell you what life can be like as a single parent in the UK
I split from ex husband when my daughter was two. She is now 23!!
Over this time, support both financially and practically for lone parents has improved dramatically.
I started out having to leave our house and going into a homeless families hostel (no family for support). Everything was sold...house (I had no job so couldn't take over the mortgage and he made it clear he wasn't going to help out - at all) ....all the furniture got sold as I had nowhere to store it, and finally the car went (he took it-and it was my car!!).
After the hostel the council gave me a nice little flat, and after a few years an even nicer little house (still living in it now). After a few months of being unemployed, I worked as a childminder which because of support for working the govt topped up my low income and I managed very well. I received help to improve myself academically, so much so I gained a degree with the O.U. I then trained at a "traditional" uni as a registered nurse.
Life now? bloody brilliant
great job, decent income, good savings, nice home....great friends.That's not to say life doesn't throw you the odd curve ball now and again...but that's life isn't it.
My message to you.....IT WILL ALL WORK OUT, IT WILL BE OK.
One step at a time. Get home, spend some time adjusting. Go to job centre, gingerbread and citizens advice to find out what help to get and where (things like getting your name down for a housing list etc) and of course getting your little one in at a local school.
Things will fall into place. One piece at a time.
pm me if you need any advice...I will help out if I can
Ty
May 19th 2013, 10:24 am
#32
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2012
Location: Devon- via Liverpool - Now Shawnigan Lake Bc
Posts: 501
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Hey,
couldn't just read and run.
Nope, I have no experience of moving back from another country.....but I can tell you what life can be like as a single parent in the UK
I split from ex husband when my daughter was two. She is now 23!!
Over this time, support both financially and practically for lone parents has improved dramatically.
I started out having to leave our house and going into a homeless families hostel (no family for support). Everything was sold...house (I had no job so couldn't take over the mortgage and he made it clear he wasn't going to help out - at all) ....all the furniture got sold as I had nowhere to store it, and finally the car went (he took it-and it was my car!!).
After the hostel the council gave me a nice little flat, and after a few years an even nicer little house (still living in it now). After a few months of being unemployed, I worked as a childminder which because of support for working the govt topped up my low income and I managed very well. I received help to improve myself academically, so much so I gained a degree with the O.U. I then trained at a "traditional" uni as a registered nurse.
Life now? bloody brilliant great job, decent income, good savings, nice home....great friends.
That's not to say life doesn't throw you the odd curve ball now and again...but that's life isn't it.
My message to you.....IT WILL ALL WORK OUT, IT WILL BE OK.
One step at a time. Get home, spend some time adjusting. Go to job centre, gingerbread and citizens advice to find out what help to get and where (things like getting your name down for a housing list etc) and of course getting your little one in at a local school.
Things will fall into place. One piece at a time.
pm me if you need any advice...I will help out if I can
Ty
couldn't just read and run.
Nope, I have no experience of moving back from another country.....but I can tell you what life can be like as a single parent in the UK
I split from ex husband when my daughter was two. She is now 23!!
Over this time, support both financially and practically for lone parents has improved dramatically.
I started out having to leave our house and going into a homeless families hostel (no family for support). Everything was sold...house (I had no job so couldn't take over the mortgage and he made it clear he wasn't going to help out - at all) ....all the furniture got sold as I had nowhere to store it, and finally the car went (he took it-and it was my car!!).
After the hostel the council gave me a nice little flat, and after a few years an even nicer little house (still living in it now). After a few months of being unemployed, I worked as a childminder which because of support for working the govt topped up my low income and I managed very well. I received help to improve myself academically, so much so I gained a degree with the O.U. I then trained at a "traditional" uni as a registered nurse.
Life now? bloody brilliant
great job, decent income, good savings, nice home....great friends.That's not to say life doesn't throw you the odd curve ball now and again...but that's life isn't it.
My message to you.....IT WILL ALL WORK OUT, IT WILL BE OK.
One step at a time. Get home, spend some time adjusting. Go to job centre, gingerbread and citizens advice to find out what help to get and where (things like getting your name down for a housing list etc) and of course getting your little one in at a local school.
Things will fall into place. One piece at a time.
pm me if you need any advice...I will help out if I can
Ty
Positive advise 
May 23rd 2013, 2:02 pm
#33
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 219
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Terrible situation to have been put in but Good luck with your new adventure as that's how you should see it 
sending positive vibes x
sending positive vibes x
Jul 7th 2013, 7:35 am
#34
BE Newbie
Thread Starter
Joined: Jan 2013
Location: Hadleigh, Essex
Posts: 48
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Hi everyone
Here's my update, 5 weeks in and counting.
Schooling - After an appeal hearing managed to get my daughter a school place in Year 7, only 2 weeks left til the summer holiday but at least she will have a glimpse of the UK secondary school system before the 6 weeks holiday.
Job hunting - secured three interviews now, nothing on par to what I have left in Canada but a job no less. Have been totally tied up in red tape known as Jobseekers Allowance, Housing Benefit and Child Tax Credit. They are tightening up on benefit claimants which I have no problem with but they don't know kind of what to do about me and my situation.
Flat rental - had to pay 6 months upfront, gulp, as have no credit history.
Credit card - not a chance!
Mobile phone contract - not a chance, my sister-in-law ended up taking it out for me.
Car Insurance - hey ho that was fun too, finally managed to get National Farmers Union to give me my 4 years Canadian no-claims but cost me double what 'Go Compare' website stated.
Traffic - everywhere.
Sea - lovely to be back on the coast, I can see the sea if I stand in the middle of my road.
The locals - have found them to be very accommodating, even a 'have a good day' or two from shop assistants! Oh and how I have missed the humour.
Food - eaten far too much, need to leave off the Cadbury's or else I will be the size of a house.
By no means am I home and dry, living with a collection of donated furniture, charity shop finds and a couple of IKEA specials but it's home for the two of us. There have been days when I have said 'what the hell have I done' but a glass of wine and a shoulder to cry on with a friend has helped.
I am getting there folks.
Back2Blighty
Here's my update, 5 weeks in and counting.
Schooling - After an appeal hearing managed to get my daughter a school place in Year 7, only 2 weeks left til the summer holiday but at least she will have a glimpse of the UK secondary school system before the 6 weeks holiday.
Job hunting - secured three interviews now, nothing on par to what I have left in Canada but a job no less. Have been totally tied up in red tape known as Jobseekers Allowance, Housing Benefit and Child Tax Credit. They are tightening up on benefit claimants which I have no problem with but they don't know kind of what to do about me and my situation.
Flat rental - had to pay 6 months upfront, gulp, as have no credit history.
Credit card - not a chance!
Mobile phone contract - not a chance, my sister-in-law ended up taking it out for me.
Car Insurance - hey ho that was fun too, finally managed to get National Farmers Union to give me my 4 years Canadian no-claims but cost me double what 'Go Compare' website stated.
Traffic - everywhere.
Sea - lovely to be back on the coast, I can see the sea if I stand in the middle of my road.
The locals - have found them to be very accommodating, even a 'have a good day' or two from shop assistants! Oh and how I have missed the humour.
Food - eaten far too much, need to leave off the Cadbury's or else I will be the size of a house.
By no means am I home and dry, living with a collection of donated furniture, charity shop finds and a couple of IKEA specials but it's home for the two of us. There have been days when I have said 'what the hell have I done' but a glass of wine and a shoulder to cry on with a friend has helped.
I am getting there folks.
Back2Blighty
Jul 7th 2013, 8:58 am
#35
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 360
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Glad you are making it and thanks for the update. I am sure you have said "what have I done" but in the end up I bet you get settled in and feel more secure in your homeland. Sorry about the 6 months up front. Hope you get housing allowance once they know you are staying and resident. God bless you and your family.
Jul 8th 2013, 2:56 am
#36
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 72
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Hi
Nice to hear an update, 5weeks in is not a long time but you have had the main things prepared.
You went the right time for your daughter to view the school prior to summer hols & sure she can make a few friends in the neighbourhood who go to the same school (may even be in the same class)
I hope the benefits situation will make decision in your favour but think you maybe able to get child tax credits not sure about the others.
The 6mnths rent is a deterent but hey you got a roof over your head as for mobile phone contract think could have bought your/a phone from canada get a UK chip & use top up vouchers.
I guess you can't beat the nfm/ncd car insurance (that will probably be the best quote you get)
I had to go through this all last year back in Canada until September to ship last bits if you need to pm me feel free, it is hard at first but like everything it gets easier, you have a good friend for support & that's better than having no1.. ..look at the bright side you can't beat good food & a good sense of humour (been getting gr8 weather lately too)
Best of luck & welcome back!
Nice to hear an update, 5weeks in is not a long time but you have had the main things prepared.
You went the right time for your daughter to view the school prior to summer hols & sure she can make a few friends in the neighbourhood who go to the same school (may even be in the same class)
I hope the benefits situation will make decision in your favour but think you maybe able to get child tax credits not sure about the others.
The 6mnths rent is a deterent but hey you got a roof over your head as for mobile phone contract think could have bought your/a phone from canada get a UK chip & use top up vouchers.
I guess you can't beat the nfm/ncd car insurance (that will probably be the best quote you get)
I had to go through this all last year back in Canada until September to ship last bits if you need to pm me feel free, it is hard at first but like everything it gets easier, you have a good friend for support & that's better than having no1.. ..look at the bright side you can't beat good food & a good sense of humour (been getting gr8 weather lately too)
Best of luck & welcome back!
Jul 8th 2013, 9:10 am
#37
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Sounds like thats a lot for 5 weeks. Well done.
that one of the jobs comes though. I say the one that pays best and you like 
that one of the jobs comes though. I say the one that pays best and you like
Jul 22nd 2013, 8:58 pm
#38
BE Newbie
Thread Starter
Joined: Jan 2013
Location: Hadleigh, Essex
Posts: 48
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
OMG, OMG, OMG I've got a job!!!!!!!
It's in the school where my daughter is studying as PA to the Principal, I start at the end of August. I am still in shock to be honest as the interview and associated tasks were very hard and there were 8 of us all interviewed and assessed on the day.
So folks I can tick that one off my list, onwards and upwards.
There are jobs out there you just have to keep applying.
Good luck everyone.
Back2Blighty
It's in the school where my daughter is studying as PA to the Principal, I start at the end of August. I am still in shock to be honest as the interview and associated tasks were very hard and there were 8 of us all interviewed and assessed on the day.
So folks I can tick that one off my list, onwards and upwards.
There are jobs out there you just have to keep applying.
Good luck everyone.
Back2Blighty
Jul 22nd 2013, 10:35 pm
#39
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 862
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Yet another inspirational thread!
The merits of advice from others who have gone through the same, on these forums, cannot be underestimated!
I have been a Single Mum (note the caps!!) for 50 years. my return is now in different circumstances to yours, but I have never lost my faith in the indomitable spirit of a woman under pressure.
(Hopefully for the fellas it's the same...balance in all things!).
Well done to you. Face the Sun-the shadows fall behind you.
The merits of advice from others who have gone through the same, on these forums, cannot be underestimated!
I have been a Single Mum (note the caps!!) for 50 years. my return is now in different circumstances to yours, but I have never lost my faith in the indomitable spirit of a woman under pressure.
(Hopefully for the fellas it's the same...balance in all things!).
Well done to you. Face the Sun-the shadows fall behind you.
Jul 23rd 2013, 3:22 am
#40
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2011
Location: North Yorkshire
Posts: 983
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
Congratulations on the job! Good luck from here on in, brave lady!
Jul 24th 2013, 12:04 pm
#41
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 360
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
congratulations. Happy for you.
Jul 24th 2013, 12:13 pm
#42
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
OMG, OMG, OMG I've got a job!!!!!!!
It's in the school where my daughter is studying as PA to the Principal, I start at the end of August. I am still in shock to be honest as the interview and associated tasks were very hard and there were 8 of us all interviewed and assessed on the day.
So folks I can tick that one off my list, onwards and upwards.
There are jobs out there you just have to keep applying.
Good luck everyone.
Back2Blighty
It's in the school where my daughter is studying as PA to the Principal, I start at the end of August. I am still in shock to be honest as the interview and associated tasks were very hard and there were 8 of us all interviewed and assessed on the day.
So folks I can tick that one off my list, onwards and upwards.
There are jobs out there you just have to keep applying.
Good luck everyone.
Back2Blighty
Aug 7th 2013, 10:20 pm
#43
Just Joined
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 1
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
just about to move back to the UK as a single mum with two kids who know nothing about the UK, having spent 9 yrs in South Africa - I can really relate to everything on here. Some great posts. And what brilliant news on the job front. Came here looking for advice and have realised that the advice doesn't have to just be about council tax and school etc, it's good to hear such motivating support.
Aug 8th 2013, 3:14 am
#44
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 603
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
I missed the news about the job Back2Blighty, congratulations!!!!
I love it when we get updates on how things are going so thank you!
Amandajf1 - good luck with everything!
I love it when we get updates on how things are going so thank you!
Amandajf1 - good luck with everything!
Aug 8th 2013, 1:16 pm
#45
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 225
Re: Moving Back As a Single Parent
congratulations on the job!
