British Expats

British Expats (https://britishexpats.com/forum/)
-   Moving back or to the UK (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/)
-   -   Making A Final Decision (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/making-final-decision-740296/)

Bevm Dec 27th 2011 11:27 pm

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by humphreydoodle (Post 9807922)
Well, I've been back in Brighton, UK now for just over 6 weeks and am realizing how drab, cold, gloomy and grey it all is. Funny how you forget when you are away, well I did anyway! Was living in Melbourne however, even that didn't do it for me. IMO Melbourne has it's nice parts but once away from the nice parts then Melbourne is pretty grotty too. The only thing that I really miss about Melbourne is the weather and uncrowded malls. So where to from here, especially as hubby and myself are in out 50's. Don't feel as we belong here or Melbourne, will have to sit it out a while and see.

You've come home in the dullest time of year for weather/light, so I don't think you can assess much from that. Give it 6 months. A cheap week in southern Europe might perk you up, or there's SAD lights.

Bev

humphreydoodle Dec 28th 2011 1:50 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 
Yes Bevm you are right I know but it's so gloomy here and for so many months every year. I forgot just how gloomy and cold it was. Daft because I have lived in the UK for 46.5 years before I left. Maybe I am having memory problems as I'm getting older!

dunroving Dec 28th 2011 2:36 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by humphreydoodle (Post 9808867)
Yes Bevm you are right I know but it's so gloomy here and for so many months every year. I forgot just how gloomy and cold it was. Daft because I have lived in the UK for 46.5 years before I left. Maybe I am having memory problems as I'm getting older!

I forget every year just how miserable it can get - I'm looking out at gale force winds so strong that they are blowing the streams on the mountains backwards (I kid you not). It's also absolutely pelting it down (or more accurately, sideways). Time to take the dog for her walk. :eek:

Lorry1 Dec 28th 2011 4:24 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by dunroving (Post 9808917)
I forget every year just how miserable it can get - I'm looking out at gale force winds so strong that they are blowing the streams on the mountains backwards (I kid you not). It's also absolutely pelting it down (or more accurately, sideways). Time to take the dog for her walk. :eek:

It's the same here in Nova Scotia today :(
Short days and long nights, I always get depressed this time of year.

sallysimmons Dec 28th 2011 5:47 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by humphreydoodle (Post 9807922)
Well, I've been back in Brighton, UK now for just over 6 weeks and am realizing how drab, cold, gloomy and grey it all is. Funny how you forget when you are away, well I did anyway! Was living in Melbourne however, even that didn't do it for me. IMO Melbourne has it's nice parts but once away from the nice parts then Melbourne is pretty grotty too. The only thing that I really miss about Melbourne is the weather and uncrowded malls. So where to from here, especially as hubby and myself are in out 50's. Don't feel as we belong here or Melbourne, will have to sit it out a while and see.

You ask "where to from here" but you've only been back 6 weeks. Isn't it a little soon to be thinking about leaving again?

I've lived in quite a few places now and what I've learned is that they all have positives and negatives. I think the secret to happiness is choosing a place, committing to it, appreciating the good things, and doing what you can to minimize the impact of the bad. That said, it must be very hard to leave the sunshine of Australia and arrive in the middle of a British winter. Like you said, just ride it out and give yourself time to settle in.

Beedubya Dec 29th 2011 6:34 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by humphreydoodle (Post 9807922)
Well, I've been back in Brighton, UK now for just over 6 weeks and am realizing how drab, cold, gloomy and grey it all is. Funny how you forget when you are away, well I did anyway! Was living in Melbourne however, even that didn't do it for me. IMO Melbourne has it's nice parts but once away from the nice parts then Melbourne is pretty grotty too. The only thing that I really miss about Melbourne is the weather and uncrowded malls. So where to from here, especially as hubby and myself are in out 50's. Don't feel as we belong here or Melbourne, will have to sit it out a while and see.

I notice you say you have moved BACK........

This is something I chose not to do, even though all my family live "there" I decided there must be a reason I left in the first place, now I am living "here" - how about giving another part of this beautiful country a go?? :thumbsup:

honeybunny2011 Dec 29th 2011 7:37 pm

Re: Making A Final Decision
 
This is such an interesting post. I've been living in nz for the last 3 odd years and I have had many many moments of severe homesickness. This year alone I have had 3 different times where I could have easily just got on the plane and returned. I really hope you find what you are looking for. To me you sound a little lost. Like someone said, sometimes we over think things. I sure do.

I also want to return home. We came here because the recession kicked in and wanted a better life. I always figured that if we didnt like it we could always go back home. Now after lots of research I dont actually think we can because the climate is so bad and we have things ok here. Only a fool would give up a job and go to a country where there are hardly any. I am going to ride it out for another year and see how I feel.

Like someone also said tho - 'what is it that actually made us all leave in the first place'? It takes a certain type of person to up sticks and leave. Who can be sure we will actually ever settle anywhere?

sallysimmons Dec 29th 2011 11:28 pm

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by honeybunny2011 (Post 9811333)
Only a fool would give up a job and go to a country where there are hardly any. ?

I think you have to remember that there is 7% unemployment in the UK, not 90%. Just because the papers are full of doom and gloom, it's easy to forget that most people have jobs.

Nothing worth having comes easy. If you are unhappy and don't do anything about it out of fear, I think that's a sad thing.

Mallory Dec 30th 2011 1:59 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by honeybunny2011 (Post 9811333)
Only a fool would give up a job and go to a country where there are hardly any. I am going to ride it out for another year and see how I feel.

Exactly. A person would need a good bit of savings to ride out long-term unemployment.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-16342072

Dingle76 Dec 30th 2011 2:40 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 
This is our problem too Humphrey. Hubby and I lived in Melbourne, I hated it, Hubby was indifferent. We left to come back to the UK in 2008. We live in a lovely village now and have made lots of friends here and the schools are of a really high standard BUT.....

We now have a 10 week old baby and I wonder whether she would have a better quality of life in Perth, even though we went back to Perth before we left Melbourne and had gone off it a bit, even though they had a drought whilst we were there so it was like a furness, even though there is a hole in the ozone layer so she would have to wear suncream ALL the time, even though when you live in Oz you can't easy go on holiday to anywhere else in the world because everywhere is so far away.

I have now started thinking daily about whether we should go back, I think I have rose tinted glasses on :)

dunroving Dec 30th 2011 3:18 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by Dingle76 (Post 9811704)
This is our problem too Humphrey. Hubby and I lived in Melbourne, I hated it, Hubby was indifferent. We left to come back to the UK in 2008. We live in a lovely village now and have made lots of friends here and the schools are of a really high standard BUT.....

We now have a 10 week old baby and I wonder whether she would have a better quality of life in Perth, even though we went back to Perth before we left Melbourne and had gone off it a bit, even though they had a drought whilst we were there so it was like a furness, even though there is a hole in the ozone layer so she would have to wear suncream ALL the time, even though when you live in Oz you can't easy go on holiday to anywhere else in the world because everywhere is so far away.

I have now started thinking daily about whether we should go back, I think I have rose tinted glasses on :)

Maybe you should watch a couple of episodes of Wanted Down Under, and that will bring you back to your senses. ;)

sallysimmons Dec 30th 2011 4:13 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by Dingle76 (Post 9811704)
This is our problem too Humphrey. Hubby and I lived in Melbourne, I hated it, Hubby was indifferent. We left to come back to the UK in 2008. We live in a lovely village now and have made lots of friends here and the schools are of a really high standard BUT.....

We now have a 10 week old baby and I wonder whether she would have a better quality of life in Perth, even though we went back to Perth before we left Melbourne and had gone off it a bit, even though they had a drought whilst we were there so it was like a furness, even though there is a hole in the ozone layer so she would have to wear suncream ALL the time, even though when you live in Oz you can't easy go on holiday to anywhere else in the world because everywhere is so far away.

I have now started thinking daily about whether we should go back, I think I have rose tinted glasses on :)

It doesn't sound like they are all that rose-tinted - you just made Perth sound horrible!

Why would you leave a 'lovely' village with lots of friends and a great school to go somewhere it doesn't sound as if you like very much? That's not a snarky question btw - I'm genuinely interested.

Lorry1 Dec 30th 2011 5:15 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by sallysimmons (Post 9811848)
It doesn't sound like they are all that rose-tinted - you just made Perth sound horrible!

Why would you leave a 'lovely' village with lots of friends and a great school to go somewhere it doesn't sound as if you like very much? That's not a snarky question btw - I'm genuinely interested.

I thought exactly the same! :lol:

honeybunny2011 Dec 30th 2011 8:25 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 

Originally Posted by sallysimmons (Post 9811527)
I think you have to remember that there is 7% unemployment in the UK, not 90%. Just because the papers are full of doom and gloom, it's easy to forget that most people have jobs.

Nothing worth having comes easy. If you are unhappy and don't do anything about it out of fear, I think that's a sad thing.

I'm not english, I'm irish so thats home for me. Ireland is in a worse state of affairs than the uk. I am mostly biding time because the house prices are dropping constantly and if we wait another year or 18 months I'm pretty certain we will be mortgage free and that in itself would be well worth the wait. I would prefer to go back to a country in recovery. At the moment its not anywhere near recover. I agree with you tho, nothing worth having comes easy, so true. I am not exactly unhappy and I do feel that I am doing something about it. Whats one more year in the grand scheme of things? It will take me that long to wrap up our life here and plan our return home. If things are still bad, my husband may well have to go to work in the uk, which is where alot of our friends are now. Thanks for you imput.

Dingle76 Dec 30th 2011 9:01 am

Re: Making A Final Decision
 
Yes it did sound like that didn't it :) hence my madness/confusion even more so then. I think it's just the weather I want really, guaranteed sunshine in the summer.

However I also want guaranteed winter snow.

Grass is always greener and all that. To be fair to Perth it is my favourite place in Oz, it just looked a bit tired when we went back as a few shops in the city had closed etc.


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