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A guide on returning back to the UK.

A guide on returning back to the UK.

Old Sep 8th 2007, 1:37 pm
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by moonlightlady
Anyone out there with advise on how a British born person who was married to a U.S. seviceman ( retired now ) & divorce pending can relocate back to Britian....absent for a lot of years due to husbands career in Military, what would I be entitled to if anything?
Wondering if Britian would tax spousal support from a different country ( U.S.A or Canada) also U.S.social security?
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Old Sep 8th 2007, 5:22 pm
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by stacey and jordan
I know you are right, but i hate feeling like this. I've had a tough few weeks, my sister is unwell and it's my nephews first birthday. I just keep wishing i was there to be with them. I think I'm just feeling sorry for myself. Well I'm off out with the kids, the sun is out. I always feel better when the sun is out.

Stacey xx
Yep, sometimes just knowing that it's a phase and labeling it so helps a lot. Just ride with the tide, sometimes it's in, sometimes it's out. If you get my drift.
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Old Sep 8th 2007, 8:25 pm
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by stacey and jordan
Hi all did a thread ages ago that I wanted to go home, as we were going through a bit of a rough patch. Things picked up for us a lot since then. Husband found a job that he loves, and good money. We are not struggling now. We moved again to a bigger house with a pool………………………

BUT the last few weeks I feel really home sick, not sure why. Might be all the rain Daughter came home upset from school yesterday, because a boy was picking on her. Calling her names “whinging Pom was one of them” how original Which has got me all upset, I feel like we will never fit in.(especially with my brummie accent) and I need that sense of belonging somewhere again.

I used BE loads to get us here it was my guide, now I need it to guide us back. We have about $70,000 in the bank. We are a family of 5. Where do I start? How much will it cost? Has anyone else gone back home penniless? I need a guide to follow, like when to cancel what or whom to inform were leaving. Who the used for what. Where did they stay. Things I need to do when I get back to the UK.

As you can see i have so many questions going around my head. I would like to read about other BE members experiences of the process of going home, like you do on the update forum. Of the last few weeks in Australia, and what happened when they got the back to the UK.

Would anybody be kind enough to share there experiences with me.

Stacey x
Hi Ya, stacey,

Can't offer you any advice as we are a family of 5 as well looking to go back...I researched on the web and found a ebook...'How to arrive and thrive in the UK'....do a search and see if it is for you ...we bought it and always go back to it as reference...
As everyone seems to have there own experiences this may help answer some of the other questions etc..
good luck...and PM me if U want, & I will try to find the link so you can see it?
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Old Sep 10th 2007, 6:52 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Hello Stacey and Jordan,

Its Moch, another Brummie! lol We came out at about the same time i think. I just wanted to say hi and offer you a *hug* . I felt awful when I first came to OZ. I think there's probably a post on here where I pour my heart out and say i'm going home... well that was 6months ago now and i'm still here!

The first 6/7 months was the hardest ever! I've only been here since Jan! lol I'm starting to feel settled now although i do miss my family and friends loads!
My OH and I are getting married in the UK in August so we're heading back home for Xmas and at the moment have no plans to return.

We came out here to experience what it was like to live in another country and we've learnt loads about ourselves and what we want from life. Going home is just another step in the decision process. We don't have children yet but we do know that our PR visa means that we can come back if we want to before 2011.

What i'm trying to say is don't feel guilty or worried because you're sad. Its ok and normal. Maybe you just need to look "inside yourself" -how cliched - and ask yourself whether or not you want to be away from your family and friends right now? I think if it was me the answer would be " no" but i've got used to it and it's ok now. I can see them on the webcam and I've stopped thinking... oh i'll pop and see so and so and then realising I can;t etc. I miss my best mate like crazy she's been in hospital and allsorts since I left and I often feel guilty about going and leaving my family and friends. At the end of the day life is too short and it goes so quickly! Perhaps forever is a long time? Maybe view it as an experience and see how you go.. know that you can go back if you want to and see if that makes a difference.

I remember one expat I met in the one and 2halves in Oldbury telling me that everyone feels awful and misses their mates. You go back home see them and it's all great for a month or two because everyone wants to see you and then life returns to normal and you realise that nothing's changed since you left and life went on without you being there and everyone's ok. At that point, he said, he realised that he was being silly.

I've started to pack my things today to ship them back home and now I feel in Limbo again! I've just got myself established out here and now i'm going back into what I know is a much busier, more stressfull lifestyle to the one I have here and I'm not sure how i'm going to react! lol

Ahhh the grass is always greener!
U know financially it costs a lot to relocate and we've been lucky in that we didn't buy we rented a fully furnished place and have kept the money from the sale of our house in a high interest account in the UK while we've been here. So when we get back we'll be back where we left off. Have you bought or are you renting? Is it feasible for you to relocate your clan?
We're moving in with my parents when we get home and then we'll be looking for somewhere to buy in the UK. My job was left open for me and my OH has continued to work for his firm out here so he just has to find a desk in the office.

We're using Chess removals to send the stuff back and it's working out a bit cheaper than it was on the way. (We've also included several cases of good Aussie wine for the wedding!)
I'm going to miss Australia heaps. I just don't know if I'll miss it enough to come back or whether it will go in a box marked (excellent experience... share with grandchildren) and I'll get on with life at home. Hey! We've even been talking about spending a year in Canada next

Take heart oh Brummie one! It will all be ok because you have fantastic group of lovlies around you to offer you love and support.

Just don't make rash decisions.. You know in your heart where you need to be and if there are any doubts at all about going home stay in Oz and see what happens. You might surprise yourself. I did!

Last edited by Mochinbach; Sep 10th 2007 at 6:55 am.
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Old Sep 10th 2007, 9:11 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by Mochinbach
Hello Stacey and Jordan,

Its Moch, another Brummie! lol We came out at about the same time i think. I just wanted to say hi and offer you a *hug* . I felt awful when I first came to OZ. I think there's probably a post on here where I pour my heart out and say i'm going home... well that was 6months ago now and i'm still here!

The first 6/7 months was the hardest ever! I've only been here since Jan! lol I'm starting to feel settled now although i do miss my family and friends loads!
My OH and I are getting married in the UK in August so we're heading back home for Xmas and at the moment have no plans to return.

We came out here to experience what it was like to live in another country and we've learnt loads about ourselves and what we want from life. Going home is just another step in the decision process. We don't have children yet but we do know that our PR visa means that we can come back if we want to before 2011.

What i'm trying to say is don't feel guilty or worried because you're sad. Its ok and normal. Maybe you just need to look "inside yourself" -how cliched - and ask yourself whether or not you want to be away from your family and friends right now? I think if it was me the answer would be " no" but i've got used to it and it's ok now. I can see them on the webcam and I've stopped thinking... oh i'll pop and see so and so and then realising I can;t etc. I miss my best mate like crazy she's been in hospital and allsorts since I left and I often feel guilty about going and leaving my family and friends. At the end of the day life is too short and it goes so quickly! Perhaps forever is a long time? Maybe view it as an experience and see how you go.. know that you can go back if you want to and see if that makes a difference.

I remember one expat I met in the one and 2halves in Oldbury telling me that everyone feels awful and misses their mates. You go back home see them and it's all great for a month or two because everyone wants to see you and then life returns to normal and you realise that nothing's changed since you left and life went on without you being there and everyone's ok. At that point, he said, he realised that he was being silly.

I've started to pack my things today to ship them back home and now I feel in Limbo again! I've just got myself established out here and now i'm going back into what I know is a much busier, more stressfull lifestyle to the one I have here and I'm not sure how i'm going to react! lol

Ahhh the grass is always greener!
U know financially it costs a lot to relocate and we've been lucky in that we didn't buy we rented a fully furnished place and have kept the money from the sale of our house in a high interest account in the UK while we've been here. So when we get back we'll be back where we left off. Have you bought or are you renting? Is it feasible for you to relocate your clan?
We're moving in with my parents when we get home and then we'll be looking for somewhere to buy in the UK. My job was left open for me and my OH has continued to work for his firm out here so he just has to find a desk in the office.

We're using Chess removals to send the stuff back and it's working out a bit cheaper than it was on the way. (We've also included several cases of good Aussie wine for the wedding!)
I'm going to miss Australia heaps. I just don't know if I'll miss it enough to come back or whether it will go in a box marked (excellent experience... share with grandchildren) and I'll get on with life at home. Hey! We've even been talking about spending a year in Canada next

Take heart oh Brummie one! It will all be ok because you have fantastic group of lovlies around you to offer you love and support.

Just don't make rash decisions.. You know in your heart where you need to be and if there are any doubts at all about going home stay in Oz and see what happens. You might surprise yourself. I did!
Thank you for such a great post.

We sold our house in England and the money we put into a saving account here. We rent here as we can't afford to buy yet just on my husbands wage. I'm trying not to make any rash decisions, as i know what I'm like. I keep questioning myself why i feel like this. Is it the fact that i miss my family and friends or that Australia is not what i thought it would be. I keep reminding myself why we came here. One of the reasons were my children, to give them a better life. We do spend more time as a family, but that's because we have no family here to visit. When i hear my daughter get upset because they call her names about being English at school. It makes me question our move even more. I have put her in this situation, and i find I'm getting so protective over my children.

My husband feels differently to me. He love it here, and thinks our situation will make our kids stronger....And as they get older there Brummie accents will not stand out so much. But he said that he will leave the final decision to me. I think I'm just going to keep an eye on my feelings and my kids feelings.

I think if i leave Australia, there's not much i would miss. I could say the weather but i know when the summer come i will not feel like this

Again thank you so much, good luck with the move and the wedding and even Canada.

Stacey xx
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Old Sep 18th 2007, 11:46 pm
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by Mochinbach
Hello Stacey and Jordan,

Its Moch, another Brummie! lol We came out at about the same time i think. I just wanted to say hi and offer you a *hug* . I felt awful when I first came to OZ. I think there's probably a post on here where I pour my heart out and say i'm going home... well that was 6months ago now and i'm still here!

The first 6/7 months was the hardest ever! I've only been here since Jan! lol I'm starting to feel settled now although i do miss my family and friends loads!
My OH and I are getting married in the UK in August so we're heading back home for Xmas and at the moment have no plans to return.

We came out here to experience what it was like to live in another country and we've learnt loads about ourselves and what we want from life. Going home is just another step in the decision process. We don't have children yet but we do know that our PR visa means that we can come back if we want to before 2011.

What i'm trying to say is don't feel guilty or worried because you're sad. Its ok and normal. Maybe you just need to look "inside yourself" -how cliched - and ask yourself whether or not you want to be away from your family and friends right now? I think if it was me the answer would be " no" but i've got used to it and it's ok now. I can see them on the webcam and I've stopped thinking... oh i'll pop and see so and so and then realising I can;t etc. I miss my best mate like crazy she's been in hospital and allsorts since I left and I often feel guilty about going and leaving my family and friends. At the end of the day life is too short and it goes so quickly! Perhaps forever is a long time? Maybe view it as an experience and see how you go.. know that you can go back if you want to and see if that makes a difference.

I remember one expat I met in the one and 2halves in Oldbury telling me that everyone feels awful and misses their mates. You go back home see them and it's all great for a month or two because everyone wants to see you and then life returns to normal and you realise that nothing's changed since you left and life went on without you being there and everyone's ok. At that point, he said, he realised that he was being silly.

I've started to pack my things today to ship them back home and now I feel in Limbo again! I've just got myself established out here and now i'm going back into what I know is a much busier, more stressfull lifestyle to the one I have here and I'm not sure how i'm going to react! lol

Ahhh the grass is always greener!
U know financially it costs a lot to relocate and we've been lucky in that we didn't buy we rented a fully furnished place and have kept the money from the sale of our house in a high interest account in the UK while we've been here. So when we get back we'll be back where we left off. Have you bought or are you renting? Is it feasible for you to relocate your clan?
We're moving in with my parents when we get home and then we'll be looking for somewhere to buy in the UK. My job was left open for me and my OH has continued to work for his firm out here so he just has to find a desk in the office.

We're using Chess removals to send the stuff back and it's working out a bit cheaper than it was on the way. (We've also included several cases of good Aussie wine for the wedding!)
I'm going to miss Australia heaps. I just don't know if I'll miss it enough to come back or whether it will go in a box marked (excellent experience... share with grandchildren) and I'll get on with life at home. Hey! We've even been talking about spending a year in Canada next

Take heart oh Brummie one! It will all be ok because you have fantastic group of lovlies around you to offer you love and support.

Just don't make rash decisions.. You know in your heart where you need to be and if there are any doubts at all about going home stay in Oz and see what happens. You might surprise yourself. I did!
Just wanted to say, what a lovely reply...its really touched on exactly my dilemna too, good to read, thanks.
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Old Sep 18th 2007, 11:55 pm
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by stacey and jordan
Thank you for such a great post.

We sold our house in England and the money we put into a saving account here. We rent here as we can't afford to buy yet just on my husbands wage. I'm trying not to make any rash decisions, as i know what I'm like. I keep questioning myself why i feel like this. Is it the fact that i miss my family and friends or that Australia is not what i thought it would be. I keep reminding myself why we came here. One of the reasons were my children, to give them a better life. We do spend more time as a family, but that's because we have no family here to visit. When i hear my daughter get upset because they call her names about being English at school. It makes me question our move even more. I have put her in this situation, and i find I'm getting so protective over my children.

My husband feels differently to me. He love it here, and thinks our situation will make our kids stronger....And as they get older there Brummie accents will not stand out so much. But he said that he will leave the final decision to me. I think I'm just going to keep an eye on my feelings and my kids feelings.

I think if i leave Australia, there's not much i would miss. I could say the weather but i know when the summer come i will not feel like this

Again thank you so much, good luck with the move and the wedding and even Canada.

Stacey xx
Stacey, I'm reading your thread, and going through so much similar stuff! We are a family of 6, only been in Oz 4 months but now looking at going back. Eldest son has already returned (only had enough cash for 1 airfare so far), he's staying with his Gran as we didn't want him to miss too much of his GCSE's. He got sick of being the Butt of everyones Pommie jokes, and missed UK friends heaps. My husband is very happy here and doesn't want to return. We are financially considerably better off in Oz, and have the weather, house, pool etc but I just don't feel I belong. I have guilt as I know he will come back, and put his families wishes first, but I am taking his dream away from him.

We cant return unitl we raise some money for airfares, but I just want to go now! Its so hard, Good luck!

Mel
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Old Sep 20th 2007, 3:20 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by stacey and jordan
I know you are right, but i hate feeling like this. I've had a tough few weeks, my sister is unwell and it's my nephews first birthday. I just keep wishing i was there to be with them. I think I'm just feeling sorry for myself. Well I'm off out with the kids, the sun is out. I always feel better when the sun is out.

Stacey xx
Stacey,

I have read your thred and can say that I know just how you feel I really do, we havebeen here 9 years and now we truly know we want to go back...we have enjoyed some of our time here and some not...we did not blame it on because we were here (our not so good times) it was when we missed things our family (we have none here) and we are all very close..our friends who are still very dear to us...lot's of things...most of he time we push all tht to the back of our minds though and get on with it...it has not been a bad life but we now realise our life is just not meant to be here...we would like to go on holidays to the Med etc with our families and friends... I would love to go to Paris for the weekend with my husband....lots an lots of things....I would go home tomorrow but in all honestly it our son who is in year 11 and the choice of do we stay until he finishes year 12 or not...somedays he really is not bothered about finishing year 12 (hey he sometimes goes on about finishing year11) our other son is in year 9 and would go home yesterday...!! and ofcourse the money we will also go home with about $170,000 maybe a bit less but with the Pound being strong it does not seem a lot...but after reading Louise D posts (thanks Louise...I now call you Louise the Wise!!) I feel a lot better about going home with not much....

Keep thinking things through it has taken us a year to make this decision....(although I do wish we had done it sooner.....thats life though!!) but I think we know deep down what we want....just the nerve? to do it.

B.Ex really does help, you know there are people who are going through what you are and you don't feel so alone.

Jackie in the land of Aus
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Old Sep 20th 2007, 5:26 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by brits1
Stacey,

I have read your thred and can say that I know just how you feel I really do, we havebeen here 9 years and now we truly know we want to go back...we have enjoyed some of our time here and some not...we did not blame it on because we were here (our not so good times) it was when we missed things our family (we have none here) and we are all very close..our friends who are still very dear to us...lot's of things...most of he time we push all tht to the back of our minds though and get on with it...it has not been a bad life but we now realise our life is just not meant to be here...we would like to go on holidays to the Med etc with our families and friends... I would love to go to Paris for the weekend with my husband....lots an lots of things....I would go home tomorrow but in all honestly it our son who is in year 11 and the choice of do we stay until he finishes year 12 or not...somedays he really is not bothered about finishing year 12 (hey he sometimes goes on about finishing year11) our other son is in year 9 and would go home yesterday...!! and ofcourse the money we will also go home with about $170,000 maybe a bit less but with the Pound being strong it does not seem a lot...but after reading Louise D posts (thanks Louise...I now call you Louise the Wise!!) I feel a lot better about going home with not much....

Keep thinking things through it has taken us a year to make this decision....(although I do wish we had done it sooner.....thats life though!!) but I think we know deep down what we want....just the nerve? to do it.

B.Ex really does help, you know there are people who are going through what you are and you don't feel so alone.

Jackie in the land of Aus
You want to count yourself very lucky going home with that amount of money. A lot of people on here (inc Louise I would imagine) have gone home virtually penniless.
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Old Sep 20th 2007, 7:00 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by northernbird
You want to count yourself very lucky going home with that amount of money. A lot of people on here (inc Louise I would imagine) have gone home virtually penniless.
I got that wrong....what was I thinking...I wish it would be that amount.....I think it might work out at about 40,000 pounds . I maybe have just listened to different people as most people here seem to say they would make a lot on their houses...ie been here for years..bought cheap and now to sell they would make a small fortune....we just bought and sold at all the wrong times, I just got the impression lots of people are "doing well" here financially....we came out with $24,000 nine years ago as we were on nearly $3.00 to the pound!!! 14 months later our home in the U.K went through the roof, the couple that bought it off us put the house up for sale an extra 40,000 pounds that is just typical of our property luck!!!

So sorry to everyone out there. I really did think everyone was going back with money....consider myself told.

from a very quiet Jackie
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Old Sep 20th 2007, 7:13 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by Munchmel
Stacey, I'm reading your thread, and going through so much similar stuff! We are a family of 6, only been in Oz 4 months but now looking at going back. Eldest son has already returned (only had enough cash for 1 airfare so far), he's staying with his Gran as we didn't want him to miss too much of his GCSE's. He got sick of being the Butt of everyones Pommie jokes, and missed UK friends heaps. My husband is very happy here and doesn't want to return. We are financially considerably better off in Oz, and have the weather, house, pool etc but I just don't feel I belong. I have guilt as I know he will come back, and put his families wishes first, but I am taking his dream away from him.

We cant return unitl we raise some money for airfares, but I just want to go now! Its so hard, Good luck!

Mel
Mel, I feel lucky as my husband wants to return home as much as me....my youngest has been bullied in the past as well....lots of "pommie" things said but he has pulled through (he did Kung Fu so nobody messes with him anymore!!)...he would go home yesterday and not just because of what happend a couple of years ago but if there was a typical "English Man Abroad" that is our youngest 14 in Nov. He watches "Only fools and horses" Red Dwarf" anything with Peter Kay in it and watches his beloved Manchester City whenever he can!! my other older son has always wanted to go home as well but he is now in year 11 doing tee's...if we had gone back a couple of years ago he would at least by now have some GCSE's but we did not so our plan is for me to go back in July (08) with our youngest and then my hubbie to follow with our oldest, home where we feel we belong (have never really felt that in Aus).....do not feel guilty about your husband....I am sure he just wants everyone to be happy and that's what counts. I have a friend here who is so unhappy (her son is as well who is in year8) but her husband just say's "you go, I stay"....terrible situation....we all make sacrificies and it is just your husbands turn.....hey....just think what we put our bodies through when we are pregnant...now that is huge sacrifice!! mine never has been the same since...headed down south somewhere. You have done a very lovely thing letting your son go now....and you will be soon together....and Aus will just be a distant mermory.

Take care and don't be so hard on yourself.
sorry for any spelling mistakes have to go to pick the boys up from school
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Old Sep 20th 2007, 9:26 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Thanks for that Jackie, speaking to my son on the phone, it is the best thing we have ever done, he is so happy........but of course...now he's boring everyone back home with how great Oz is!!!

We have just enough for the flights, I can't bare to wait for house to sell, would rather go back with nothing and struggle than be so unhappy here. I am waiting to hear if we've been successful on a rental application back home, with no credit rating or jobs I'm not holding my breath, and we won't have any funds to pay 3 - 6 months in advance to secure it. But its in catchment for the kids old schools, so if we get it I will fly back in the next 2 weeks, hopefully with hubby.

OMG, how true about pregnancy... We have always moved around a lot due to OH work, so I guess it is his turn to take a back seat, and let us find our feet again at home....I'm sure we'll be fine. Good luck to you and yours, and thanks for the kind words,

Mel
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Old Sep 21st 2007, 1:38 am
  #28  
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by Munchmel
Thanks for that Jackie, speaking to my son on the phone, it is the best thing we have ever done, he is so happy........but of course...now he's boring everyone back home with how great Oz is!!!

We have just enough for the flights, I can't bare to wait for house to sell, would rather go back with nothing and struggle than be so unhappy here. I am waiting to hear if we've been successful on a rental application back home, with no credit rating or jobs I'm not holding my breath, and we won't have any funds to pay 3 - 6 months in advance to secure it. But its in catchment for the kids old schools, so if we get it I will fly back in the next 2 weeks, hopefully with hubby.

OMG, how true about pregnancy... We have always moved around a lot due to OH work, so I guess it is his turn to take a back seat, and let us find our feet again at home....I'm sure we'll be fine. Good luck to you and yours, and thanks for the kind words,

Mel
Glad to help Mel!!

My husband works up in the Mines (never done it before!!) 4 weeks on 1 week off....he phones every night and it is lovely to talk to him but I wish he was here...tonight when he phones I am going to say "s-d it lets just sell up and go now"...he is not keen with the job he is on so he has nothing to loose there.....and I was upset by a "friends" comment last night and I just realised...I am sick of putting up with all this....I would rather go home than stay......this "friend" (she was born in Aus and is very proud of that which is lovely, her parents were Scottish) and at football (NOT AFL!!!!)training last night she was talking to another person when she said that "in England the class system is awful" and was going on and on about it...(I dont get involved..everyone has their own thoughts and ideas)l....anyway I did, I actually asked why she thought that about the class sytem and she said her husband, who is from London did not get where he wanted to be while working for a certain British bank because of his "cockney" accent and that was due to the bad class system in the U.K well I replied and said "there is a class system in most countries to a certain point"...."not in Australia" my friend said "most people who come here make good money and get better jobs"...I said "not everyone"...and I went on to say that mine and my husbands family are northern working class people, with strong Northern accents who have done very well despite their accents.....and live VERY good lives...."oh no" my friend said "her husband was never promoted to a position he should of been in because of the class system..they did not like hos accent"..I said "well maybe he should of tried for a position at a different bank as obiously that bank was wrong" "he did" snapped my friend and got upto leave (training had nearly ended) "he got a better job here in Perth and we have done very well out of it as we do not have a class system here" and walked off.....she was upset because I had not go along with that life here is "the land of Everything".....I should know by now never to knock Australia.....which I don't.......Every country has something good and bad about (bloody hell, I am the first to go on if England are knocked out of anything.and laugh when someone knocks the weather..etc) it but I realised you just cannot critise anything about Aus....I suppose that is a nice way to be but not the "real world" and so to the end of my story (sorry everyone out there) but that is one of the reasons we have never really settled...we just don't feel we belong.
Jackie a little wiser (and older) than was yesterday
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Old Sep 21st 2007, 1:50 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by brits1
Glad to help Mel!!

My husband works up in the Mines (never done it before!!) 4 weeks on 1 week off....he phones every night and it is lovely to talk to him but I wish he was here...tonight when he phones I am going to say "s-d it lets just sell up and go now"...he is not keen with the job he is on so he has nothing to loose there.....and I was upset by a "friends" comment last night and I just realised...I am sick of putting up with all this....I would rather go home than stay......this "friend" (she was born in Aus and is very proud of that which is lovely, her parents were Scottish) and at football (NOT AFL!!!!)training last night she was talking to another person when she said that "in England the class system is awful" and was going on and on about it...(I dont get involved..everyone has their own thoughts and ideas)l....anyway I did, I actually asked why she thought that about the class sytem and she said her husband, who is from London did not get where he wanted to be while working for a certain British bank because of his "cockney" accent and that was due to the bad class system in the U.K well I replied and said "there is a class system in most countries to a certain point"...."not in Australia" my friend said "most people who come here make good money and get better jobs"...I said "not everyone"...and I went on to say that mine and my husbands family are northern working class people, with strong Northern accents who have done very well despite their accents.....and live VERY good lives...."oh no" my friend said "her husband was never promoted to a position he should of been in because of the class system..they did not like hos accent"..I said "well maybe he should of tried for a position at a different bank as obiously that bank was wrong" "he did" snapped my friend and got upto leave (training had nearly ended) "he got a better job here in Perth and we have done very well out of it as we do not have a class system here" and walked off.....she was upset because I had not go along with that life here is "the land of Everything".....I should know by now never to knock Australia.....which I don't.......Every country has something good and bad about (bloody hell, I am the first to go on if England are knocked out of anything.and laugh when someone knocks the weather..etc) it but I realised you just cannot critise anything about Aus....I suppose that is a nice way to be but not the "real world" and so to the end of my story (sorry everyone out there) but that is one of the reasons we have never really settled...we just don't feel we belong.
Jackie a little wiser (and older) than was yesterday
Sorry Mel about my last post (I should of opened a different thread...sorry)...You will be fine at home...your son is happy and you will be when you are together again....and when you are in a place where you are happy you can face anything....can you not stay with family for a time? or rent a holiday place? is there anything like that anywhere near where you are heading to...they might be slightly more expensive but you could rent week by week and not have to pay a bond....I knew someone who did that and they used what bond they had to put to a deposit on a house instead a few months later...plus the kids loved staying there as they felt "on holiday"...just a thought.....

Anyone out there got any thoughts on "renting" ect? All will be fine when you are on that plane, the stress being here will leave you and with your family around you, you can face most things....

Take care
Jackie who is now going to lighten her day up by going to Mac Cafe!!! wow wee an exciting life I lead!!!
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Old Sep 21st 2007, 3:07 am
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Default Re: A guide on returning back to the UK.

Originally Posted by brits1
Glad to help Mel!!

My husband works up in the Mines (never done it before!!) 4 weeks on 1 week off....he phones every night and it is lovely to talk to him but I wish he was here...tonight when he phones I am going to say "s-d it lets just sell up and go now"...he is not keen with the job he is on so he has nothing to loose there.....and I was upset by a "friends" comment last night and I just realised...I am sick of putting up with all this....I would rather go home than stay......this "friend" (she was born in Aus and is very proud of that which is lovely, her parents were Scottish) and at football (NOT AFL!!!!)training last night she was talking to another person when she said that "in England the class system is awful" and was going on and on about it...(I dont get involved..everyone has their own thoughts and ideas)l....anyway I did, I actually asked why she thought that about the class sytem and she said her husband, who is from London did not get where he wanted to be while working for a certain British bank because of his "cockney" accent and that was due to the bad class system in the U.K well I replied and said "there is a class system in most countries to a certain point"...."not in Australia" my friend said "most people who come here make good money and get better jobs"...I said "not everyone"...and I went on to say that mine and my husbands family are northern working class people, with strong Northern accents who have done very well despite their accents.....and live VERY good lives...."oh no" my friend said "her husband was never promoted to a position he should of been in because of the class system..they did not like hos accent"..I said "well maybe he should of tried for a position at a different bank as obiously that bank was wrong" "he did" snapped my friend and got upto leave (training had nearly ended) "he got a better job here in Perth and we have done very well out of it as we do not have a class system here" and walked off.....she was upset because I had not go along with that life here is "the land of Everything".....I should know by now never to knock Australia.....which I don't.......Every country has something good and bad about (bloody hell, I am the first to go on if England are knocked out of anything.and laugh when someone knocks the weather..etc) it but I realised you just cannot critise anything about Aus....I suppose that is a nice way to be but not the "real world" and so to the end of my story (sorry everyone out there) but that is one of the reasons we have never really settled...we just don't feel we belong.
Jackie a little wiser (and older) than was yesterday
You know Jackie, and I have been reading all the posts on the subject of not fitting in etc., there are always trade-offs wherever one is. I have lived in Australia myself and although it was a long time ago I can still remember being called a Pom even then. I have, as a Brit. lived overseas for many years and what happens I believe is that one is never ever truly accepted in the foreign country - we are always "foreigners" and when we are too long overseas we become almost "foreigners" in our own country or what was our "own country". If you and others feel that Oz, or anywere else, is no longer for you even after you have really given it a go, then go home. The emphasis being on HOME. I have always been restless, always loved travelling and experiencing new places but as one gets older, and I am now retired, I still hanker for "home" but "home" is no longer an option given the housing market. Whatever is said about the UK housing market it may well continue to escalate and if you leave returning for too long it will be even more difficult for you to re-establish yourselves . Family and good friends are THE most important part of life. When you have them it is everything although we don't necessarily cherish them when they are around.
I do wish you all the best.
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