British Expats

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-   -   The Pope (https://britishexpats.com/forum/maple-leaf-98/pope-787007/)

Tangram Feb 11th 2013 11:34 pm

Re: The Pope
 
They should run it like American Idol and have a phone in vote 1-888-pope.

caretaker Feb 12th 2013 12:19 am

Re: The Pope
 
If my memory is correct, after a country & western release or 2, Michael Nesmith of The Monkees made a video called Flying Down to Rio or similar and one segment was an interview with Pope Brad, the first Surfer Pope - "Hey, you wanna kiss my ring? Oh no!, somebody bagged my ring, man!"

Greenhill Feb 12th 2013 12:33 am

Re: The Pope
 
I've just scanned the thread so I'm reasonably ignorant about the content. Anyway, isn't it time they had a mid-20's black female lesbian skiing pope?

I think this would do wonders for the image of the church. Especially if they could post some pictures of her wearing just the papal tiara while cuddling a couple of busty blondes :thumbup:

ninaDGBCA Feb 12th 2013 1:29 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by mandymoochops (Post 10539170)
maybe doing a 180. They must have had a meeting and said "look guys we f****d up a bit with the last one, I mean hitler youth FFS :frown: we need to pick someone the polar opposite of this ....................."

Maybe the catholic church should check first that the Canadian candidate wasn't involved in the Canadian Indian residential school system or the Italian's parents weren't somehow fond of Mussolini.

He was a child back then, it was legally required to put the boys in the HY. It's his parent's that should be blamed or the regime or the incompetence of a whole nation to stand up and refuse to follow.

Shard Feb 12th 2013 1:42 am

Re: The Pope
 
A little pope-ish humour from the internet:

After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limo, (and he doesn't travel light), the driver notices the Pope is still standing on the curb. 'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver, 'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?' 'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive at the Vatican when I was a cardinal, and I'd really like to drive today.'

'I'm sorry, Your Holiness, but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! What if something should happen' protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning. 'Who's going to tell' says the Pope with a smile. Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 205 kms. (Remember, the Pope is German.)

'Please slow down, Your Holiness' pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.'Oh, dear God, I'm going to lose my license -- and my job!' moans the driver. The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio. 'I need to talk to the Chief,' he says to the dispatcher. The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going 205 kph. 'So bust him,' says the Chief. 'I don't think we want to do that, he's really important,' said the cop. The Chief exclaimed, 'All the more reason!' 'No, I mean really important,' said the cop with a bit of persistence.. The Chief then asked, 'Who do you have there, the mayor?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief: 'A senator?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief: 'The Prime Minister?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

'Well,' said the Chief, 'who is it?'

Cop: 'I think it's God!'

The Chief is even more puzzled and curious, 'What makes you think it's God?'

Cop: 'His chauffeur is the Pope!'

Former Lancastrian Feb 12th 2013 3:24 am

Re: The Pope
 
Does he get a pension? If he is like a Canadian MP then he has over 6 years under his cassock so to speak so eligible for a pension I guess.
I wonder what his retirement package is like?
Priority seating at church, a bottle of wine a day for communial purposes.
A supply of dry wafers.

Shard Feb 12th 2013 3:26 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by Former Lancastrian (Post 10540200)
Does he get a pension? If he is like a Canadian MP then he has over 6 years under his cassock so to speak so eligible for a pension I guess.
I wonder what his retirement package is like?
Priority seating at church, a bottle of wine a day for communial purposes.
A supply of dry wafers.

...and a complimentary pointy hat !

Tangram Feb 12th 2013 5:34 am

Re: The Pope
 
"Bet the bugger gets paid to the end of the month too".

Greenhill Feb 12th 2013 5:40 am

Re: The Pope
 
I don't know why he quit, I mean, it's not like his boss ever turned up at work to check on him.

Novocastrian Feb 12th 2013 5:40 am

Re: The Pope
 
I think it's time for another Borgia. They at least were fun.

<and openly corrupt unlike the last ones>

Tangram Feb 12th 2013 5:43 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by Novocastrian (Post 10540491)
I think it's time for another Borgia. They at least were fun.

<and openly corrupt unlike the last ones>

I would suggest if they are rebooting the whole Pope franchise, Daniel Craig would be an ideal candidate....he has done so well with Bond.

Hawk13 Feb 12th 2013 5:44 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by Greenhill (Post 10540489)
I don't know why he quit, I mean, it's not like his boss ever turned up at work to check on him.

?? I figured his "boss" was always watching. ;)

Novocastrian Feb 12th 2013 6:28 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by Hawk13 (Post 10540501)
?? I figured his "boss" was always watching. ;)

No, the boss is my next door neighbour. It's a maison secondaire like ours.

He's never there.

Alan2005 Feb 12th 2013 6:33 am

Re: The Pope
 
They should give the job to a non-catholic just to annoy anyone who uses the phrase 'is the pope catholic?' a lot.

bats Feb 12th 2013 6:41 am

Re: The Pope
 

Originally Posted by Tangram (Post 10540500)
I would suggest if they are rebooting the whole Pope franchise, Daniel Craig would be an ideal candidate....he has done so well with Bond.

I like your thinking.


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