Hi Katmandu

Thank you for posting these wonderful thoughts of your daughter - I now understand what my mom went through when I left for Alberta in August last year.

Things will get better for you over the next few weeks and whether you had a fab or bad relationship with your daughter (and I am not saying that you have a bad one ) you will see how much your relationship blossoms and how much more quality conversations you will have with each other - instead of just phoning for a moan or talking drivel like me and my mom used to.

Keep ya pecker up as they say in Manchester and take it easy - you will be able to tell how your daughter is just by the sound of her voice when she calls you.

love to you

Gaynor
x

PS - Are you Alvic's mom ???

When I read the post I wondered the same, I'm sure she has worried about leaving you as much as you are worrying about her.

I'm not there yet, and we're doing kind of the opposite by leaving our kids here

When you get that first phone call, the tears will flow from both of you, as somebody said you should be proud of your achievement.
Your daughter is an independent, adventurous spirit, which you have created.

Take care

Rosie

Hi there, I can understand how you are feeling. My son ,daughter in law and my two grandchildren aged 3 and 5 are heading for Saskatoon end of February. I have spells already when I could just burst into tears god knows what I will be like when they go. However I try to keep up by thinking it wont be long until May when we are planning our first visit. We really want them to go as my son has a good job as a heavy plant mechanic and their lifestyle will be so much better than here. But like yourself just not seeing them every other day will be terrible. We have set up Skype so that will be one good thing.

Look on the bright side you have now adopted all of us

i don't mean that to be rude i know it will hurt and i will hurt when i say goodbye to my older children,my parents friends and family,
i mean when you are feeling low come on here and you will get lots of support and a big hug take care both of you

All you dear people have helped me enormously and yes my daughter is "Alvic", God bless her and Hubby, they are in an hotel in Manchester tonight with their two wee dogs and will fly off to Calgary tomorrow afternoon, the dogs will go into kennels for two nights and daughter and hubby stay overnight in Calgary and fly on to Regina on Sunday morning. Almost four days of travelling so spare a thought for them too.
I took her wee fleece which she had been wearing to bed last night and it was like a comforter.
Still have bouts of tears and sore throat from crying but as I have said you lot have given me great support- it's strange how you all seem to be friends to me after one day and to be honest I didn't think I would get this response at all. (In fact I didn't think anyone would reply) How wrong I was!! You are all so sympathetic and kind.
Was talking to my daughter a few minutes ago and she couldn't sing your praises high enough - said she could not have done it all without your support.
So again many thanks and hugs to you all and good night for now

Hi again,

Good to hear 'alvic' and her Other Half (OH) and dogs, are on their way and you've already spoken to her

Now its time for you to start planning your visit, they can't get rid of you that easy

Take care
Rosie

Thanks Rosie
They have finally arrived after a long four days. I have not spoken to them as they couldn't get through to my house phone and their cell phones won't work in SK! But my other daughter received a call to say they have been to their house and are off to buy some essentials...only have a bed in house so will be a bit empty for a while.
Yesterday was a bad day for me as it was the day they finally left the UK (left N.Ireland on Thursday) which made it really sink in that they are gone. I do feel better at times and then the tears come again ...guess it will be like this for a while.
As you say the next thing is to get a trip booked out there and that will be something to look forward to.
Feel sorry for my other daughter as she has two very young children and just bought a house which needs some work done to it, therefore thinks it will be a long time before she sees her sister again and is really very distressed about it, also hubby not taking it so good.....have to get the webcam up and running asap.

Hi there, yes you sound heartbroken and it does take time to deal with things..My mother died a few weeks ago in the UK and i have been in Canada for the last 20 years, her biggest regret was that she never got around to visiting very often, so as soon as you can book your first trip out and visit with her, when I used to call home my mum couldnt relate to anything I was chatting about so we just resorted to small talk, take an interest in where your daughter lives and friends etc when you get there and beleive me you will have a solid base for many more years of togetherness....dont forget Webcams and Skype calls also help but nothing beats a good old fashioned letter in the mail...I used to tuck mine away and re read it when I was feeling blue...
my thoughts are with you
JS

Its good to hear they arrived safe
Are your hubby and daughter reading these posts ? It may help a little but the post from JSHalifax, IMO, is good advice, make sure you've got a webcam and skype!

Rosie

My mum wasn't too happy about me moving all the way to Canada, but she slowly got used to the idea through the processing time. (No work offer for me, so a good two years. )

She came to visit for the first time last spring, after I had been here for 15 months, and when she left, she said it now was easier for her to understand why I love it here, as she had got to meet my friends here, see where and how I live, and experience a bit of life in Canada.

So my advice is, book a holiday to go see your daughter, and familiarise yourself with her life as it is now, and not how it used to be before she moved. (It'll also give you something to look forward to, and ease the pain a wee bit...)

Hi Katmadu, I'm glad my adopted daughter and her husband arrived in one piece . Once they've settled tell her I'll pop over. I sent her my phone numbers today but am not sure if they've got a computer system to set up. I'll pm you my numbers for you to let them know in case they need anything. It'll be nice to meet you soon, Al said you had already booked your seats .

We have our first visits in July, Mal's sister and bil are coming over. We have left behind my mother who will be 80 in March, our daugher and two grandchilren and our son. I have some bad days but know that they will be coming over soon, we also use msn and skype to keep in touch. We have sasktel and the price of phone calls is not too bad so I ring on a proper phone weekly as my mother doesn't do techi stuff I've just bought her a computerised photo frame for her birthday and am busy filling it with photos, that'll throw her off she won't have a clue what to do with it

Take care

Lorna

My experiences are the same as the poster (I forget who) who said they came here many years ago.

We came here about 40 years ago. I think things were very different back then. I had moved out of home when I was about 18 and lived with friends. I moved to various places from Croydon to Richmond to Earl's Court. I did move back home for a while and then moved out again and then moved back again and I got married and lived near my parents, but I think I was very independent. My younger sister did the same thing and she moved to Vancouver a couple of years after we moved to Saskatchewan.

I got along very well with my parents. But they were also very independent. My Dad was a big wheel in the Lions Club and they travelled all over the world going to conventions.

When I said I was coming to Canada they bought me a sheepskin coat. We never shed a tear - we all regarded it as a big adventure. But then I think that was the kind of family we were.

Everyone is different.

So when I moved here, my Mom and Dad used to come over every year. After my Dad died more than 20 years ago, my Mom still visited. One year she came for six months and stayed 3 months with me and 3 months with my sister. She did all my ironing and cooking for me - it was like having a maid.

And this was in the days before computers and web cams and when long distance was too expensive, so we more or less stayed in touch by letters sent by snail mail.

She used to come over every year until she was about 84. Then health insurance was almost impossible to get and about that time she had a mild heart attack and was really not well enough to travel on her own. She is 92 now and still going reasonably strongly.

I have two sons. If one of them decided to move far away, I wouldn't be too happy about it. But, being the kind of family we are, I would not rant and cry and make them feel guilty about the decision they had made. I would encourage them and keep in touch by phone and computer and visits. I suppose people won't like what I have to say, but I will say it anyway. Making a fuss and telling them how they are ruining your life and making them feel guilty for doing what they feel is right - to me I think its really selfish. I would probably try to persuade them not to go, but once I saw they were committed I would be helpful and encouraging.

Good morning one and all
Yes it is a great relief to know Ali and hubby have arrived safe and sound and today will complete their wee family when they get their wee dogs.
I dreamt last night that I was out shopping with her in SK for curtain fabric so was nice to hear her voice and see her even in my dreams. Also am looking forward to speaking to them on phone later today.
I have a pic of their new home on my pc background and it all seems so real now to know they are inside it. They got through immigration no bother which was also a great relief.
Their realtor, Virginia and hubby has been a real angel in getting everything ready for them and had their house nice and toastie warm. Don't think you would get and estate agent back here who would do such a thing. They will need to get out now and buy some basics for the house (and some more warm clothing!), which will keep them occupied.
I can't wait till they get a computer not only so as we can communicate via webcam but also so that Ali can get back to communicating with all you wonderful people. I will repeat again how much you have helped in understanding how I felt in parting with my beloved daughter.
Lorna D I have PM'd you.

What a lovely thread, BE really works sometimes. I'll try to get karma all round.

You didn't tell us we had a sister lovely post your such a sweetie