Rete

Can only imagine how you are coping at the moment. Thankfully it was mild but yes, even mild strokes will change personalities. Please take care of yourself as well.

Jerseygirl

I am very sorry to read that. Hopefully he will make a full recovery. Please make sure you take care of yourself.

BristolUK

Thoughts and fingers

Gordon Barlow

It will be a minor turning point for him, I think; a major one only if he doesn't recover physically. I had a mini-stroke (Bell's Palsy) in my early 70s and I became a lot more self-conscious about the way I looked - a twisted smile, for one thing. Also more health-conscious - "what if it happens again?" Those things didn't amount to a personality change, but I can see how that could happen.

Jingsamichty

Best wishes to you and Mr. Bats.

bats

Thank you for all the kind wishes, things could be worse.
btw Gordon Bell's Palsy isn't a stroke. Bell's is facial nerve damage whereas a stroke is brain damage

Gordon Barlow

Yes, you're right - although the symptoms are similar. When I was in the A & E at our local hospital the doctor did some of the same things he would have checked for a stroke - even to the point of wheeling me in for a PET-scan or CAT-scan (one of those; I can't recall which.) My symptoms never went away, and I became a lot more self-conscious, as I said. You can expect that your man will feel self-conscious too. If he's lucky, he won't.

Gordon Barlow

Many of us believe that death will be the last Turning Point. For those of us who don't believe in life after death, we have nothing to look forward to when we die. Group 1 usually tell their heirs where they want to be buried; Group 2 don't bother. There is a story about Yogi Berra an American baseball coach of note, who asked to be buried on the hillside of the selected graveyard. When his family asked which side of the hill he would prefer, he said "It doesn't matter. Surprise me." A friend of mine took her husband's ashes and scattered them in the sea off Nassau in the Bahamas. "He always wanted to come back to Nassau", she told me. I belong to Group 2. I buried my Mum's ashes where she fell, in a manner of speaking. She and I were extraordinarily close, and these decades later I still mourn her. But I could never identify her ashes as her. I did the same with Linda's ashes. There was no essence of her in there, so it didn't matter what happened to them. I didn't even ask our son. Maybe I should have, but he has never commented on my decision.

My sentimental side did come to the fore when I was wandering around English churchyards where my English ancestors were buried, and sitting in the pews they sat in. I once found myself standing on the gravestone of an ancestor in the East Teignmouth parish church in Devon. It wasn't among the stones propping up the boundary fence, but I got lucky in my second search. Here in Cayman, the Filipino community sends all the bodies back home who die here. I sometimes contribute a bit, because it's important to them; but I'd really rather they gave the money to the survivors.

dbd33

That's the kind of news that makes me think "buy another car", "get a new mistress", "canter over those poles", tomorrow could be too late. Best of luck to you both.

bats

Thank you, I'm being a useless carer right now as I've got COVID and the poor man is having to fend for himself. I call it rehab therapy.
You're right though, do the stuff.

Jerseygirl

Yikes!!! Never rains, but pours eh?

I hope you are able to shrug Covid off quickly. Take care of yourself.

Rete

Hmm Covid. It can be mild or it can be devastating. With the jabs it will most likely [hopefully] be mild. Perhaps this is what he needs at the moment ... mandatory self-care.

bats

He's doing pretty well considering thank you. I am improving and guess that this is a comparatively mild case but it is still awful. In theory our isolation is up on Wednesday but I don't see the sense in that if I'm still coughing and spluttering. Forced shutdown is probably a good thing Neighbours have been great with shopping and dogwalking for us

Gordon Barlow

I said last week (#98 above) that my next Turning Point would be my last. I hope to go quietly and of course without pain - or as little as can be managed. Linda and I had both signed up with the Dignitas place in Switzerland, but when the end is near there are certain things that have to be done, and there just wasn't time for me to do them. I have my "DNR" instructions in an envelope on the fridge door - and my main instruction is "Don't send me to a hospital in the US"! I don't trust them at all. They have the reputation - here, at least - of not letting a patient go until the money runs out. I'd be interested in knowing if anybody agrees with that.

I've told my son not to give me a funeral. I'm not a believer, so there won't be a church service. Linda was, so I had a memorial service for her, and a reception in the church hall, three weeks after she died; But there was no funeral - just a cremation, without ceremony.

Piff Poff

Hugs and best healing wishes to your husband Bats. Hugs to you.