Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
#46
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Go on holiday and let her house sit!
I had this problem with some of our visitors this year - never saw much of them in the UK and then suddenly they are staying with you for 4 weeks!
I had this problem with some of our visitors this year - never saw much of them in the UK and then suddenly they are staying with you for 4 weeks!
#47
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
She's not difficult to get along with really. I'm pretty lucky. Mrs Rich is her only daughter and her husband died a few years ago. She's helped us out a great deal in the past, so it's only right we take care of her.
We're open enough with her that any little irritating habits or issues that inevitably occur, we tell her straight up. She has to just accept ours
We're open enough with her that any little irritating habits or issues that inevitably occur, we tell her straight up. She has to just accept ours
#48
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Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Rich - you are a saint - there is no other word for it.
Don't get me wrong, there isn't anything major about her that bugs me, it's the little things - but they seem to add up. If I thought she was only staying a few more days I think I'd be fine - but another 4.5 weeks doesn't sound particularly good. Some good tips here. I will do more DIY on the basement, like the idea of driving somewhere to take the dog for a walk (anyone been to Point Pleasant Park in Halifax ?) and will definately drink more !!!!
Don't get me wrong, there isn't anything major about her that bugs me, it's the little things - but they seem to add up. If I thought she was only staying a few more days I think I'd be fine - but another 4.5 weeks doesn't sound particularly good. Some good tips here. I will do more DIY on the basement, like the idea of driving somewhere to take the dog for a walk (anyone been to Point Pleasant Park in Halifax ?) and will definately drink more !!!!
#49
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Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Being a mother -in -law myself and planning to go for a 4 week visit to Canada in the New Year what ground rules should I be sticking to do you reckon? I have visited a good few times in the past but would like to know what are definite no no s for a visiting mother-in-law.
I do get on great with my daughter and her hubby but it is good to know what irritates other son/daughter -in-laws.
Granma Nessie
I do get on great with my daughter and her hubby but it is good to know what irritates other son/daughter -in-laws.
Granma Nessie
#50
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Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Being a mother -in -law myself and planning to go for a 4 week visit to Canada in the New Year what ground rules should I be sticking to do you reckon? I have visited a good few times in the past but would like to know what are definite no no s for a visiting mother-in-law.
I do get on great with my daughter and her hubby but it is good to know what irritates other son/daughter -in-laws.
Granma Nessie
I do get on great with my daughter and her hubby but it is good to know what irritates other son/daughter -in-laws.
Granma Nessie
Try not to have an "silent tut" thing going on.
I'm happier now my MiL feels able to put her feet up and actually relax in my house.
#51
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 48
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
I need help. My mother in Law has come to visit, she's only been here 2 days and there is another 33 to go.
Before we moved over to NS she used to come and stay for the odd night, but that wasn't so bad as I could cope (reasonably well) with short visits. I reckon in another day or so I'll be ready for her to go home, but she'll have another 4.5 weeks over here. What can I do ?????? Any tips apart from drinking myself silly ?
Before we moved over to NS she used to come and stay for the odd night, but that wasn't so bad as I could cope (reasonably well) with short visits. I reckon in another day or so I'll be ready for her to go home, but she'll have another 4.5 weeks over here. What can I do ?????? Any tips apart from drinking myself silly ?
#52
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Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Ontario
Posts: 152
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Best tip - try and do some things independently if you can and give your son & daughter in law some time without you. I reckon this will work even if you ask them for a lift somewhere to have an evening out or day out without them. If you can get away for a couple of days or so - even better
Granma Nessie
#53
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
My inlaws stayed for 3 weeks recently and we just asked that they stay out of the way when we were rushing around in the morning and it worked out well. My FIL likes to get up during the night too and was worried he would disrupt us so we made up a tray on their first day and left it in their room on a nest of tables - like you would have in a B&B with a travel kettle, tea, coffee and cereal bars. I guess it helped that they had a washroom off their bedroom too.
But 3 weeks is a long time....we did enjoy it and missed them once they were gone; the house seemed very quiet.
But 3 weeks is a long time....we did enjoy it and missed them once they were gone; the house seemed very quiet.
#55
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Top tip from a daughter-in-law - respect their rules for their children and how they are choosing to raise them, even if you don't necessarily agree with them!
I am fed up of my in-laws (who are well aware of the rules we have for our kids) feeding them constant sweets, letting them stay up late, making my son skip his nap because they want to take him and show him off around their friends, etc. Then they hand them back and we have two sleep deprived, E numbers stuffed, sugar high children for the next couple of days who are horrendous!! Drives me mad! Mother-in-law even gave my daughter solid food at 3 months old (when I was still breastfeeding and had no intention of giving her solids for at least another month), telling me I was being 'silly' about it and she knew best. GRRRRR!!!! I could list loads of other stuff i.e. not bothering to put them in their car seats in the car ('we never had them in my day and my children were fine'), giving them salt in food when babies, etc, etc.
Basically, ask them first (i.e. if your granddaughter misbehaves, how do they want you to discipline her etc) and follow their rules! My in-laws have always been great and I really liked them until I had children. Just a clash of child raising ethics I guess (luckily hubby agrees with me rather than them) but it does make it awkward.
Hope that helps! Good luck, have a great visit.
I am fed up of my in-laws (who are well aware of the rules we have for our kids) feeding them constant sweets, letting them stay up late, making my son skip his nap because they want to take him and show him off around their friends, etc. Then they hand them back and we have two sleep deprived, E numbers stuffed, sugar high children for the next couple of days who are horrendous!! Drives me mad! Mother-in-law even gave my daughter solid food at 3 months old (when I was still breastfeeding and had no intention of giving her solids for at least another month), telling me I was being 'silly' about it and she knew best. GRRRRR!!!! I could list loads of other stuff i.e. not bothering to put them in their car seats in the car ('we never had them in my day and my children were fine'), giving them salt in food when babies, etc, etc.
Basically, ask them first (i.e. if your granddaughter misbehaves, how do they want you to discipline her etc) and follow their rules! My in-laws have always been great and I really liked them until I had children. Just a clash of child raising ethics I guess (luckily hubby agrees with me rather than them) but it does make it awkward.
Hope that helps! Good luck, have a great visit.
#56
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Joined: Aug 2008
Location: Ontario
Posts: 152
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Oh yes they know as they are sponsoring me to come over so I will need my own space eventually but I expect to be involved with picking up granddaughter from school etc etc and in return they won't let me starve.... I don't mind eating all the leftovers and I may use my son-in-law's muscles for the snowclearing.
Granma Nessie
Granma Nessie
#57
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Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
Oh yes they know as they are sponsoring me to come over so I will need my own space eventually but I expect to be involved with picking up granddaughter from school etc etc and in return they won't let me starve.... I don't mind eating all the leftovers and I may use my son-in-law's muscles for the snowclearing.
Granma Nessie
Granma Nessie
#58
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 279
Re: Tips on surviving the Mother in Law Visit
I need help. My mother in Law has come to visit, she's only been here 2 days and there is another 33 to go.
Before we moved over to NS she used to come and stay for the odd night, but that wasn't so bad as I could cope (reasonably well) with short visits. I reckon in another day or so I'll be ready for her to go home, but she'll have another 4.5 weeks over here. What can I do ?????? Any tips apart from drinking myself silly ?
Before we moved over to NS she used to come and stay for the odd night, but that wasn't so bad as I could cope (reasonably well) with short visits. I reckon in another day or so I'll be ready for her to go home, but she'll have another 4.5 weeks over here. What can I do ?????? Any tips apart from drinking myself silly ?