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So when does it "get better"

So when does it "get better"

Old Apr 6th 2019, 1:22 pm
  #46  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

If it hasn't happened after three years, unfortunately I think the answer is that it doesn't get better.

Nothing wrong with not liking it and wanting to go back.

I think you need to have a very serious conversation with your family about how you are feeling. They may be open to compromise . . . or you may find they don't actually like it either and are just good at show. Young kids don't worry about - they will slot back in, if you go back to the UK.

I remember a thread some years ago where that happened, both partners pretended for a few years that all was well, one finally confessed and then the other admitted it too.
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Old Apr 7th 2019, 10:55 pm
  #47  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by dbd33 View Post
Lake District, Snowdonia and, if you're willing to go Canadian distances, the Alps.


It's OK to not like somewhere & not have concrete reasons for that feeling or to simply just feel a place is just not a good comfy fit for you.
You only have the one life and you have given it 3 years I think. Sit down and try to have a candid talk with your family if you haven't already.
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Old Apr 7th 2019, 11:37 pm
  #48  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by no good name View Post
I can not think of 1 thing that I could not do in the UK that Canada / Ontario holds a speciality on...

(Skiing, Mountain climbing, Hillwalking, Hunting, Fishing, Camping, Mountain Biking, Kayaking, Canoeing, Ice Skating etc etc ....) even the beloved 'TIMMIES' average coffee is now available in Glasgow.
Well there are lots of things.......snowmobiling for a start, I had an amazing season doing that this year with friends, skiing, actually only had time to go once the snowmobiling season was so busy went once. Scotland has ski resorts but last 10-15 years there have been useless with no snow.....i guess you can go ice skaiting at the local rink, but cant really compare it to skating outside on a frozen lake. Then summer.....I have a boat, lots of older boats here that dont cost a great deal, if your prepared to do some of the work on them yourself, there is no way I could have ever even think about owning a boat in the UK......maybe a narrow boat, but I wouldnt fancy going swimming in the canal, then there is camping is far more fun in Canada, its not just a green field with camp fires not allowed, the camp fire is central in the middle of rustic woodland, you can swimming in the lake .....never warm enough to do that in UK. Which is another aspect thats better in Canada.....guaranteed summer, you can actually plan things.

There are things that you can do in both countries, but if you enjoy any aspect of outdoor activitiies which I do, then Canada offers so much more

Dont get me wrong I still love certain things in the UK too, that Canada lacks, but my point was is that there there are things that you can enjoy in Canada, that are out of reach in the UK or you just cant do as well as well as you can here.

.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 5:46 am
  #49  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Pulaski View Post
So if you could do all those things in the UK, and can also do them in Canada, where's the problem?
The main problem I found in Canada was the amount of holidays the average person gets.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 11:24 am
  #50  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

What made you think in the 1st place that Canada would/might be better?
Most of us agree Canada is different to the UK. Some will say its better and I am sure others will say its the same and some will say its worse. It is what it is.
Did someone have a gun pointed at your head to move to Canada? Was there a promise of a land full of gold covered streets and unicorns and rainbows?
Sure Canada has its challenges for newcomers from a variety of countries. I doubt people from Somalia, Eritrea, Ethiopia and a few others rarely complain about what Canada has to offer compared to their home countries.
I know it's hard not to compare but that is one of the downfalls that a lot come up against.
Moving to another country doesn't always work out for the better and in some cases, it can be a disaster. Some have tried their best to make it work but it didn't for a multitude of reasons.
I always look at what were the reasons I wanted out of the UK or other country and did things change? In my case they did. I am not saying it was better it was different I adapted and now I am content with life in Canada. I had no expectations of it being better.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 12:30 pm
  #51  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Paul_Shepherd View Post
Well there are lots of things.......snowmobiling for a start, I had an amazing season doing that this year with friends, skiing, actually only had time to go once the snowmobiling season was so busy went once. Scotland has ski resorts but last 10-15 years there have been useless with no snow.....i guess you can go ice skaiting at the local rink, but cant really compare it to skating outside on a frozen lake. Then summer.....I have a boat, lots of older boats here that dont cost a great deal, if your prepared to do some of the work on them yourself, there is no way I could have ever even think about owning a boat in the UK......maybe a narrow boat, but I wouldnt fancy going swimming in the canal, then there is camping is far more fun in Canada, its not just a green field with camp fires not allowed, the camp fire is central in the middle of rustic woodland, you can swimming in the lake .....never warm enough to do that in UK. Which is another aspect thats better in Canada.....guaranteed summer, you can actually plan things.

There are things that you can do in both countries, but if you enjoy any aspect of outdoor activitiies which I do, then Canada offers so much more

Dont get me wrong I still love certain things in the UK too, that Canada lacks, but my point was is that there there are things that you can enjoy in Canada, that are out of reach in the UK or you just cant do as well as well as you can here.

.
But isn't it also about timing and every life is different. While you might be able to afford a boat, many others in Canada can't afford it either, especially those who moved in recent years. I drove past Carlingford Lough 2 weeks ago and there were plenty of boats out and about, so I can't imagine that it's much different in some other parts of the UK. Although we live in the Republic of Ireland, I usually go swimming in the lakes and especially in summer the water is pleasant. Even now you have people swimming in the Med around Alicante and the water temps of our lakes in summer wouldn't be different than the sea temps there now. As said timing is the biggest issue. If we moved to our location today, we would be paying 3 x more for a mortgage. That's the big problem and housing/rental prices have gone up everywhere, be it Canada, Europe and other parts of the world, so many people just don't have the spare cash, even if a boat is cheap for you. It's the same when old retired British people can't understand why a young Spanish person would want to leave Benidorm and work in Bristol.

Last edited by Moses2013; Apr 8th 2019 at 12:34 pm.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 6:13 pm
  #52  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Johnboyuk View Post
The main problem I found in Canada was the amount of holidays the average person gets.

Thats my pet hate!!! Its not even a bad joke!

Sometimes I wonder if I lived back in the UK I would have move time to vacation in Canada!
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 6:31 pm
  #53  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Moses2013 View Post
But isn't it also about timing and every life is different. While you might be able to afford a boat, many others in Canada can't afford it either, especially those who moved in recent years. I drove past Carlingford Lough 2 weeks ago and there were plenty of boats out and about, so I can't imagine that it's much different in some other parts of the UK. Although we live in the Republic of Ireland, I usually go swimming in the lakes and especially in summer the water is pleasant. Even now you have people swimming in the Med around Alicante and the water temps of our lakes in summer wouldn't be different than the sea temps there now. As said timing is the biggest issue. If we moved to our location today, we would be paying 3 x more for a mortgage. That's the big problem and housing/rental prices have gone up everywhere, be it Canada, Europe and other parts of the world, so many people just don't have the spare cash, even if a boat is cheap for you. It's the same when old retired British people can't understand why a young Spanish person would want to leave Benidorm and work in Bristol.
To be fair my boat is nothing decandant, its 32 years old, and easily affordable to a person who can afford to emigrate to Canada with a resonably paid job. However I will acknowledge that its probably a little more difficult in recent years due to big increases in property prices, coupled with an increase in the cost of living over here too.....which eats away at disposable income. I guess if OP has a family too, then thats not cheap....I don't so that does free up a bit more cash.

I was making a point that there are things that you can do here that you cant in the UK. Just like in Canada you cant find many decent pubs with decent ale with the great social atmosphere to go along with it, but you can in the UK.

As many people have said, it basically comes down to the reasons you made the move in the first place, if that wasn't strong enough, maybe you just did it just for a change, or for work, or you did it for someone else, then your probably never going to settle.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 8:44 pm
  #54  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Paul_Shepherd View Post
To be fair my boat is nothing decandant, its 32 years old.....
Got any pics?

Maybe there could be a BE boat race?

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Old Apr 8th 2019, 9:02 pm
  #55  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

From comments that I've seen posted on here over the 6 or so years that I've been on or looking on the site, I think some Brits think that Canada will be just like Britain ....... it's part of the Commonwealth but some still think of that as meaning it's a colony.

They expect the same way of life, the same foods, the same pubs, etc etc.

It's a shock when they find out it is a different country, that one needs a visa to come and live here, that they have to pass an English exam for some visas, etc etc.

Canada has basically been separate from the UK since WW1 when the men who went overseas and fought, died or were injured, showed that Canada had a spirit all its own. Although it took many more years to get the Constitution back here.

Do people emigrate to Australia expecting it to be like England but better???

I think someone who does emigrate here expecting to have a better life while living in a version of England will always be disappointed and unhappy.

I'm not sure how anyone can make it any more clear that Canada is not the UK, just as it is not the US although many aspects of our way of life are more like the US than they are of the UK.


We came out of a spirit of adventure, not really knowing what we were coming to. We hadn't researched provinces, costs of housing, where to live, or anything like that. The job opportunity for my husband came more or less out of the blue. The Pacific Northwest sounded like a good place ......... being botanists, we did know about the forests, the giant trees, and generally equable climate in the region. We came for 2 years, as I've posted earlier, but found "our" place and had the opportunity to stay for ever. Not that stopped looking at other opportunities when they came up ............. and we always did it with that sense of adventure, or "Why not try and see how far it takes us?"

Since the day we arrived, we've spent time learning about this country, this province, this city, the peoples who were here first and those that came after, the animals, the geography, taken every opportunity to visit different areas and meet people living in those areas. I've studied First Nations and how they lived, used plants, etc, especially those that live in BC. We've collected art, we made sure our child tried every sport that was available, especially those that we had never had the chance to know "back in the day".

At first, it was form the "we're only here for 2 years, so let's experience everything we can". When jobs became permanent and we knew we'd be staying, it became "we're living here now, let's know the history, geology, animals and plants like we once had to learn at school about England".

Were/are we so very different from people 30 or so years younger?
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 11:34 pm
  #56  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by scilly View Post
From comments that I've seen posted on here over the 6 or so years that I've been on or looking on the site, I think some Brits think that Canada will be just like Britain ....... it's part of the Commonwealth but some still think of that as meaning it's a colony.

They expect the same way of life, the same foods, the same pubs, etc etc?

Or they find it too similar and dislike it for that. Comparison is the thief of joy sadly.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 11:45 pm
  #57  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Paul_Shepherd View Post
To be fair my boat is nothing decandant, its 32 years old, and easily affordable to a person who can afford to emigrate to Canada with a resonably paid job.
I think there are an awful lot of immigrants who it wouldn't be easily affordable for. Not long after we moved to Canada, everything was looking like sunshine and roses, then I became seriously ill and my husband had to fit working around being my carer. Things were extremely bleak.
I had a travelling the world, great paying career which I loved, but I doubt I'll ever be able to return to it as my health is very unlikely to ever improve enough for that. In the blink of an eye things can change.

​​​​​​Just because things were rosy when someone emigrated doesn't mean they stay that way.

Since that time, things have improved drastically for us, and we are now thankfully worlds apart from that, but the OP has said that he doesn't have the great job, oodles of money etc, and whilst nobody knows what goes in behind closed doors, who knows if he's going through a crisis other than regretting emigrating.
Poverty sucks the soul out of you wherever you are.
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Old Apr 8th 2019, 11:46 pm
  #58  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Sorry Paul, I quoted your post, but that wasn't aimed at you, just a general observation
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Old Apr 9th 2019, 2:52 am
  #59  
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

Originally Posted by Paul_Shepherd View Post
To be fair my boat is nothing decandant, its 32 years old.
Pah! My car is older than that. Practically new, that is.
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Old Apr 9th 2019, 1:30 pm
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Default Re: So when does it "get better"

going the other way, my wife came over from Canada and has been in Scotland now for 10 years, total culture shock for a good while at the start, only last year or so feeling at home. We may well go back to Canada and I think she will have readjusting to do again along with me!
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