London Mike

Good luck!! My mum took it badly ("taking the grandchildren away" etc). I made a mistake of saying that Britain was in a mess, Canada was paradise. Big mistake. My advice: don't trash the place you're leaving behind! Focus on the positive reasons for moving and the opportunities it presents for you and your whole family really. Canada ain't no shangri-la either ...

Top Cat

Lots of luck, Hope it goes well.

We went down the 1 year route with my family and they still cant discuss it with us. They also think its a phase that we will get over and they expect us to be back having failed., and realising the grass isnt greener.

Great when you have that kind of support.

However we are 'taking the only 2 grandchildren' away! so we kind of just let them vent their feelings.

Just be positive and remember the reasons why you want to do it.

Good luck

Top Cat

The Broady's

Good luck! When we told my in-laws they were so shocked which wound me up as they emigrated to Canada at the same age as us (but subsequently moved home when hubby and his brothers were born.)

I think they are thinking that if kids present themselves that we will go back however we have been dropping hints that it is much easier nowadays with skype to keep in touch etc. We will see

Fingers crossed,let us know how it went

duncanspilaweller

Uh Oh!

When i first told my parents we had a massive argument. I ended up staying at my sisters house for the night. i had the good old 'future grandchildren will be across the other side of the world' , 'do you prefer (girlfriends) family to ours?'. i think all this mainly happened as the girlfriends mum had just visited and they really didn't like her.

My PR visa has just been approved and now i have to go and tell them that i have to enter Canada before May 12th - not looking forward to that one!

So i feel your pain. Good Luck.

Dunc

treehavn

Oh, that sounds familiar My mother in law was incredibly supportive of the decision to move (back) to Canada...until we spent a month living with her prior to flying out, and she decided I was the antichrist incarnate after 12 years of her son and I being together. Grief/loss/whatever can make people behave irrationally, but a year later we're (mostly) over the schism.

Good luck to the OP!

R I C H

I'm amazed at how many adults seem to need permission to move house, or need some sort of validation about their choice of lifestyle and career.

If it's something you really want to do, is there an argument against it that would change your mind?

Butch Cassidy

Miss Clinique

My Mum and the in laws were fine. It was the grown up children we had probs with.

Good luck.

Bali2010

Hope it goes well Linsy.

For me I just got a bit of an uncomfortable gap in conversation - really cos my pops would prefer me to stay around i.e. the same town, as per now.

He is ok now, and he already has the opportunity to apply to move to bc (my sister already there) & whilst he likes it whilst there, the flight is long & he wouldn't want to settle there.

He doesn't voice his concern / own view, as that is not his way, but I know he would be happier if I stayed.
I just drip it into conversation every so often, to try to make sure it doesn't become an unmentionable topic.

Like someone else has already mentioned, I'm careful not to trash the UK - it just has different things to experience over there.

Bali

LinsyPinsy

Thanx everyone
Here goes...just to update you here is a copy of a previous post I put on a few weeks ago, to give you an idea of the background to this story. Then I'll tell you what happened today...you might want to grab a coffee/tea as this is a long one.
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Went to Canada for a 'holiday' in August 2009. Joked with my parents that we (hubby and 2 kids) might get a one way ticket. They actually joked that this wouldn't be a bad idea. No reason to stay here for us...my mum said. I thought great...I'm teeing this up nicely.
Went on holiday and came back but didn't see them properly until kids back at school. Unfortunately by the time I saw them, my daughter (9) told her pal we were going to Canada to live, her pal then runs to her mum(my pal) who then blabs to my dad...ooooops.
Frosty reception from parents, tears/snotters the lot. ''Do you realise the winters are really harsh?'' ''You'll come back with nothing'' ''your being selfish''
We cant talk about it now...its taboo. My son unfortunatly keeps reminding them by practicing his canadian accent.
We are going back in August for 3 weeks for a proper reccy, look at property/schools etc, so I'll need to speak to them before soon. Really worried. I know I'll miss them, but I think they will miss us more, poor souls. Is that a reason to stay in the UK...Guilt?
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Thats the story so far until today....bearing in mind not a word has been spoken about 'The Subject That Dare Not Speaketh Its Name'


Practiced my chat about 15 times in the car, got it down to a tee.
I sat them down and said...''This is really difficult but'' to which my mum replied ''If this is about Canada, your dad and I have been talking about this and have suspected that you are serious and it's OK, whilst we will miss you all dreadfully and would prefer you stayed we cannot allow our selfishness get in the way of what you want for your family'. They apparently took our decluttering as a sign that we were clearing out in prep for the move, (little did they know we had mice!!!) OMG couldn't believe it. Really shocked. We had a civilised chat about our reasons to move and 'give it a go' and they are cool about it...well as cool as you can be when you drag their precious grandkids across the world. We thought about doing the 'only for 6-12 months thing', but the kids aren't daft and they would blab to them of our real plans. Thought it best in our situation to rip the plaster of in one go and not to peel it off bit by bit. Everyone is different, but appreciate the advice all the same. Thanx.
Kids now know that Gran and Papa know and they are happy too.
Still got in-laws to do, but got a feeling they'll be glad to see the back of us!!!

Just wanted to say a huge thank you to you all. Wishing those of you who have still to go through this all the best of luck.

Linsy

Poppit

Hi LinsyPinsy

Glad all went well for you today and goodluck with the inlaws.

Poppit

sharkus

Well that is certainly good news and obviously not what you were expecting which makes it even better.

It does strike me as odd when parents of an adult get all stroppy about their children moving to another country, thinking the kids are selfish, and trying to hurt them in some way. The age old "Canada is so far away" line gets used a lot, funny how the same people are happy to travel far further for extended holiday's but when it's said they could come out and visit in Canada it's another story.

Thankfully my parents were happy and proud I was coming over here, and they still are, I think it's because we now have a house and so they know they don't have to pay for a hotel when they visit

lancashirebird

Good luck with the inlaws

LinsyPinsy

In laws will not be a problem....I could bet on that!!! But thanx anyway
Yes, I've mastered multiquote!!!
Cheers for that. Mum has apparently printed off maps of BC, has contacted Virgin media to find out how much it is to call Canada and has costed flights. Seems like they have been busy since my 'friends' faux pas last August. Perhaps she did me a favour...I'm sure I could rent her out if anyone is interested !?!
lins

Bali2010

Glad it went so well.

If they are checking out calls, worth suggesting skype & webcam - a world of difference I find with the web cam.

Bali